from the
Holy Land
from
Rabbi Ephraim Schwartz
"Your friend in Karmiel"
December 26th 2025 -Volume 16 Issue 10 6th of Tevet 5786
Final Destination
One suitcase, that's all your allowed to take with you. What do you pack? You're never going back home again. Your next destination, the next country you'll be going to will be the place where you will spend the rest of your life. It's where you will not only have to rebuild, recreate, survive but also where you will die. So what are you putting in that one suitcase? What possessions have you acquired over your entire life that you not only feel are too sentimental to leave behind, but that you understandably feel that you will need to begin again anew and start over with?
I'm curious what you were thinking I was referring to when you read the above paragraph. Was this a historical question for you, that all of our ancestors had to go through inevitably when they got too fa and comfortable in their place of Exile and when Hashem decided the time was up and it was time to throw them out. To move them on. To bring them closer to home. Or more often to death, to martyrdom, to another pathetic land where we would have to start the vicious cycle of galus once again. Was that the exercise you thought I was asking you to engage in? To do my traditional "Rabbi-Schwartz-scare-them-out-of-their-galus-complacency" thing. To get them to realize that the time is up and that they should really think about getting out before the hatchet falls and the Zyklon starts pumping so they don't end up like the last 6 million who didn't get the message from God and read the writing on the wall. Is that what you thought I was asking you?
Or maybe, hopefully, you were thinking entirely different about the question. It was a question not about galus, but rather about geulah, about redemption. About the shofar blowing. About wings of eagles (yes, I know that’s just a metaphor and that nesher isn't really an eagle). About Aliya, that you claim to have been dreaming of making, and in fact the only reason why you haven't is because you're scared of your children being drafted and going off the derech. But now they've resolved that with a new law and your children are too old, and they got exemptions forever. So now you can do what you always claimed you were certain to do-if they took care of that problem. You chapped as well, that there's no tuition crisis here and you'll save close to a hundred thousand dollars a year on tuition bills. And it’s a much better country to live in, rather than moving to Cleveland. Milwaukee or even Miami for those benefits. And you even get a mitzva for living here. So what do you pack in that one suitcase. That's all I'm giving you. They don't have Costco size storage closets here. There are no basements. You're getting a small apartment. What are you packing?
I think it's interesting for you to figure out which of the above questions and scenarios I was referring to above in the first paragraph. I think it's telling and revealing where your heart lies. How attached you are to the place you're living. How much in the forefront of your mind geula and Eretz Yisrael is. One thing I can tell you for certain though is, that the Chafetz Chaim, the Gaon of Vilna, the Baal Shem Tov, the Shela Ha'Kadosh, The Chasam Sofer and most of the other great Rabbis and Rebbes and leaders of the last few hundred years who waited every morning for that shofar blast, certainly would've read it the second way and even had that suitcase packed all ready to go.
I remember when we moved to Israel 15 years ago, we had the moving company that was arranging our lift come give us an assessment of what we were able to fit and bring and not. Needless to say, we had too much stuff. That was even after they sold me on the 40 foot extra hi-cube lift and we had run a bunch of garage sales. So we spent the next few weeks slowing getting rid of our stuff that we had accumaulated over the decades. We had narrowed it down quite a bit and were quite proud of ourselves. Yet, when they came back for their second review, they advised us to mark our things with green, yellow and red sticker in order to prioritize what should be packed as it looked like it still wasn't able to fit.
Needless to say, the next few days there was lots of sticker fights going around the Schwartz house. My wife would put some red stickers on some very important things that I had labeled green (like that huge stuffed monkey that had been with me since I won it at a carnival in Wisconsin Dells back in my camp counselor days in Aguda Midwest in the Summer of 94'), yes I still miss him. And mysteriously enough it seems like an angel came down from heaven and retaliated for me by removing her green stickers from millions of Chinese herbs and vitamins and knitting embroidery sets that obviously was totally unnecessary to shlep along.
Va'yavo ha'yom- moving day finally came and guess what? There was plenty of extra room and we went out shopping to Costco to fill up the stupid container, because otherwise they said we would have to pay extra for bars to hold everything in place. I paid to fill this baby, I was going to make sure I got my money's worth. Funny enough, I bought a huge shed there that was on sale for about 600 dollars and figured it would be great to store things in. However when they were loading it up, I saw that it was in fact not only Kesser brand, made in Israel, but their factory was in Karmiel a few blocks from my house. I was pretty annoyed that I had paid so much for something in Costco that would've probably been cheaper in Karmiel where it was made, but guess what? I priced that same shed here when I arrived and it incomprehensibly sells for… can you guess? 4000 shek! About 4 times the price! I should've bought five of them!
Now to get back to the dvar Torah part and life changing aspect of this E-Mail and the biblical level of this all. We certainly find that when the Jews left Egypt and came to Israel, then there was a concept that we were meant to empty the whole country out. We left Egypt, like an empty net that all it's fish removed, Chazal tell us. Our job there in Egypt was to find all the sparks of holiness and uplift them and bring them home. Yes, even the sparks in the holy stuffed monkey that sadly didn't make it here. In this week's Torah portion though we actually have the opposite scenario taking place though. And there's a Rashi that I learned this week, that I guess I never really noticed before, but it's truly mind-boggling. Its message is powerful and very relevant and perhaps even the secret to the redemption. Let's check it out together.
See in this week's parsha (my Bar Mitzva one!) of Vayigash, Yaakov heads down to Egypt for the last time. This is the opposite of the above scenarios. He's not moving from galus to galus, and he's not moving to Israel. He's heading out. It's all over. He's got one suitcase. Actually, that's not really true. The truth is Yosef sent him wagons and wagons to bring his stuff with. He's flying first class Pharaoh airlines down in Wagon Force One and he's got no limits one what he can take down with him. Yet the Torah tells us something fascinating about Yaakov's lift and last minutes in Eretz Yisrael.
He firsts heads down to Beer Sheva on the way out. It seems that this is the first important thing for him to do. It's the place where our Patriarchs spent a lot of time and where both Avraham and Yitzchak built altars and Hashem revealed Himself to them, promising them this land. It's as well where Avraham planted his Eshel trees and hosted all his guests and taught the world about Hashem. By the way do you know what street the Schwartz family lives on in Israel? Eshel. Maybe that's why I'm so passionate about teaching the world about this holy land and why we all need to be here to serve Hashem properly. So the first thing Yaakov does is chop down some of those trees and shleps them down with him. He wants his kids to have these trees of Avraham to build the Mishkan with and to remember that they're roots are here in Israel. They need to come back home. They're job is to unite together as the beams of the Mishkan symbolize and bring the Shechina back home. That's the first piece of luggage he packs up.
As well I find it fascinating that his departure airport is from Beer Sheva. Do you know what Beer Sheva is? It's the southern most point of the Biblical settled land of Israel. It's the place that is thus named after the treaty Avraham and Yitzchak made with Avimelech the king of Gaza, of the Plishtim; The ancient Chamas, Palestine. Do you want to know why we're going down to Galus. Because we made treaties with Hamas. Because we didn't conquer that land. Because we gave it away in exchange for "peace". Remember children, why we're leaving. Daven strongly that Hashem promised this entire land for us to return to. Don't make the same mistake when you come back. The last look out of the window of that cattle car train taking us down to what will become our slave pits in Egypt should be of the land that we didn't fully conquer and that we will come back to.
Yet what is most fascinating to me is his next stop that isn't really mentioned but that Rashi notes. It seems that Yaakov made a pit stop down by Esau his brother in Edom. There he unloaded his luggage and piled it up in front of him. Listen to Rashi who quotes Chazal on this verse
Bereishis (46:6) And they took their livestock and their possessions that they had acquired in the land of Canaan, and they came to Egypt.
Rashi notes that the verse is quite specific that he only brought the stuff he got in the land of Canaan. The Israeli made possessions. Yet, what about all the big money and sheep and goats that he got back by Lavan? What about all his nursing homes? His commercial real estate investments? What about his camels, his donkeys, his Teslas and his Range Rover? That he brought back with him from Padan Aram? I mean we know that this stuff was precious to him. Back in Vayishlach Yaakov goes back for some small little vessels that he left behind, maybe you know those little snow globe trinkets with pictures of Padan Aram in them. He even endangered his life for them and ended up fighting the angel of Yosef. So what about all the big stuff and bucks he made back in the alteh heim?
Rashi thus tells us amazingly what happened to them.
"But of what he had acquired in Padan-Aram he gave everything to Esau for his share in the Cave of Machpelah. He said, “Possessions acquired outside the Land of Israel are inappropriate for me.” This is the meaning of “which I acquired for myself with heaps” (Bereishis 50:5). He placed before him stacks of gold and silver like a heap of grain and said to him, “Take these.”
Can you imagine this scene? Yaakov had piles of piles of gold, silver, stocks, bonds; he was a billionaire. He made his big bucks in his twenty or so years by Lavan. After-all we all know you can't really make a living in Israel. As the old joke goes, how do you make a million dollars in Israel? Come with two million. And what does he do with all of that? He piles it up and places it in front of Esau and says "here, nem…my teiheireh bruder… It's all yours. Just affirm that the burial place our zaydeh Avraham paid top dollar for is mine. It goes to me. I'm the first-born. Just so there's no misunderstandings later." Take it all. It's meaningless to me. It's shmutz la'aretz gelt. It's not worth anything to me. I have no need or purpose for it over there. It did what it was supposed to do. It brought me home to Israel. I raised all it's sparks. Tzi vert gornisht…It's just extra baggage.
What is important is for Yaakov and that he wanted his children to learn and know is that the only thing important for them to remember when they go into galus is that all the money that they will make there has only one purpose. And I'll tell you a little secret. It's nor for building fancy shuls, mikvas, batei midrash and kollelim there in chutz la'aretz. It's to bring that money back home to Eretz Yisrael. It's worth dumping it all that "white house- Bayit Lavan" money, programs, grants, subsidies in a pile in front of that red-headed uncle of ours for even a grave in Israel. That's the message Yaakov sent to his children and to the world when they went into exile. It's the most important message of galus. To never lose focus of our goal. Our real destination. The only place that we're meant to call home. When he leaves Israel, he doesn't need a suitcase or a lift. The only thing he needs is a folder with a title to a cave in Chevron. Or being an Israeli probably one of those little plastic insert things that they love to use here, because they don't know what a real folder looks like. That's the only thing he packs. It's the only thing that he knows will make him never forget where he's meant to return to.
That is as well the final message Yaakov gives to his children. He leaves only one message to his children. Bring me home. Take my bones with you. Yosef his son the richest guy in Egypt as well makes his brother take that same oath. All of the brothers as well the Midrash tell us sent that message to their children. I take my tourists to the kever of Dan by Beit Shemesh and the grave of many of the other tribes on Mt. Arbel. The 40 years in the wilderness they were all brought back here with them. It wasn't just because of kevura in Eretz Yisrael and lice as Rashi tells us, but it was because they wanted their children to remember what their homestead was. Where a yid is supposed to live and the only place where his flesh can return to the earth it was formed form. All the money and "success" and prosperity that we will enjoy in exile- and today perhaps like never before, Yaakov wanted us to remember that it's only chutz la'aretz gelt- "v'einan k'dai li-it's not worthy of me". I'm better then that. I'm more than that. It's only there to get me home.
We just finished Chanuka, a holiday that only a small fraction of Klal Yisrael experienced it's miracles, as most Jews never came back for the second Temple. They stayed in galus. They had lots of money and success and they jus didn't want to shlep to a country that was inconvenient and always at war with it's enemies. We're heading to the holiday of Purim which ends with Queen Esther nudging her son Darius to allow Ezra and Nechemia go back and rebuild the Bais Ha'Mikdash, which he does. Little did she or even he dream that most Jews weren't really interested. That ninety percent of Klal Yisrael liked the new administration of Persia. They were happy sending duffle bags if there was a war and sending their kids there for seminary. But the real money is there. It's for that reason, Chazal tell us, it was ultimately doomed from the onset. It's why there was no miracles in the second Temple, like there was in the first. Because the miracles only come when we're all there. When we're all home.
This week hopefully we won't be fasting on the tenth of Tevet. The holiday that starts off the series of fast days that commemorate the destruction of the Temple that began with its siege on that date will hopefully be turned to a day of celebration. Of the return of the Temple. Of Klal Yisrael telling Hashem that we're willing to leave everything behind and take not even one suitcase with us to be able to see You once again. To be home. To see it rebuilt. To be one family. All we have here is not k'dai for us. It's extra luggage. Bring us home. And if someone can pick up monkey on the way from Seattle I would really be grateful. I really miss him.
Have a uplifting Shabbos
Rabbi Ephraim Schwartz
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YIDDISH PROVERB OF THE WEEK
" Tsuzogen un lib hoben kost nit kain gelt "- It doesn’t cost anything to promise and to love.
RABBI SCHWARTZ'S TOUR GUIDE EXAM QUESTION OF THE WEEK
answer below at end of Email
13. The name of the Egyptian president in the Six-Day War is _______
Who are the leaders who signed the peace treaty between Israel and Jordan and in the
presence of which American president did the signing take place?
A. Yitzhak Rabin and King Hussein, in the presence of US President Bill
Clinton
B. Shimon Peres and King Hussein, in the presence of US President George
W. Bush
C. Yitzhak Rabin and King Abdullah, in the presence of US President George
W. Bush
D. Shimon Peres and King Abdullah, in the presence of US President Bill
Clinton
RABBI SCHWARTZ'S COOL VIDEO OF THE WEEK
https://www.youtube.com/shorts/kdeLaopWLf4 – Reb Shloima Carlebach on after Chanuka sadness… amazing vort!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zv-Wk22YXqE – If you have to watch one thing this week. This is it. It's mindblowing miracles that you don't even chap are going around right now…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dil7on82jhc&list=OLAK5uy_n6et0hZ1CZfLaZpFFP4fCYFNE92DJkU4M – Ok It's Shwekey week with these amazing Shabbos music drops… Here's he first one erev Shabbos
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JVR8dRw--2U&list=OLAK5uy_nH__SlTF3KPf6GSXDZIDqXA7YyeVe4Ypc – Here's his Kabbalas Shabbos drop…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CeS7f8yjnxY&list=OLAK5uy_m9HU7OJlfwCO3XwCNix86nAJkPLws-WXA - and here's his Leil Shabbos songs playlist amazing…!
RABBI SCHWARTZ'S ERA’S AND THEIR PLACES AND PEOPLE IN ISRAEL OF THE WEEK
(Little break in chronology for the fast this week..)
Septuaguint - 246 BC- This Sunday is the 8th of Tevet. It was at one point a fast day but it got incorporated with the fast 2 days later of the 10th of Tevet. It recalls a day that our sages tell us was as bad as the Golden Calf. It was the day of the writing of the Septuaquint or Targum Shivi’m in the words of our sages. Ever hear about it? Did you think it’s that bad? Well you’ll be fasting for it this Tuesday why not learn about it.
See in about the year 300 BC or so a short little Greek Guy named Alexander who humbly called himself the Great came to Israel. With him comes all types of Greek culture. He’s good to the Jews but his generals that take over…not so much. The Egyptian King Ptolmey decides to have the Torah translated into Greek. He takes 72 Rabbis locks them into 72 rooms gives them a pen and boom get to work. Miraculously all 72 came out with identical texts, this was despite the fact that they all made politically correct changes to it. Although it was a miracle, our Rabbis saw it as a bad thing. For now, the Torah would become just another philosophy book on the shelf. Jews would assimilate more and more and Hebrew our sacred tongue as well would not be utilized by the next generation.
This phenomenon of the Septuagint and assimilating Jews during this period of the second Temple where I mention this can be seen all over Israel. In Jerusalem in the Herodian street under the old city one can see Greek writing all over the place and its influences. In the synagogues in the Ir Dovid and the north of Israel as well which id from a bit later period Greek is the commonly written language. In Tzippori one can see the illiterate Hebrew with words misspelled on the shul floors. In the cemetery in Beit Shearim we find graves that are inscribed in Greek with Greek epitaphs and names of daughters of Rabbis that are buried there that are entirely Greek; Atio and Atheon for example. Perhaps the place you see it most vividly is in the Israel Musuem where you see much of the assimilated Jewish Hellenists Mosaics and art that has been uncovered and at the museum of the Good Samaritan in the Dead Sea region as well.
It gives me, and my tourists, pause to see this striking Greek assimilation and it makes you think about what they might say about the plethora of English Torah books, if that’s a good thing as well. On the one hand it has certainly opened up Torah to many who would not have access. On the other hand maybe we should fast, and pray for the fact that we have lost Lashon Hakodesh as our mother tongue.
RABBI SCHWARTZ’S TERRIBLE LUGGAGE JOKES OF THE WEEK
I just told my luggage there will be no vacations this year. Now I’m dealing with emotional baggage.
I tried to sue the airport for losing my luggage. I lost my case.
Don’t you just hate that situation when you’re picking up your bags at the airport, and everyone’s luggage is better than yours. A worst case scenario.
Or alternatively… A German was packing his luggage for holiday when his wife interrupts him...
"I hope you're not going to bring sausages again", she said, "They exploded everywhere last time and caused a frightful scene!"
"It'll be fine", He said, "Stop worrying about the wurst case scenario".
A photon is going through airport security. The TSA agent asks if he has any luggage. The photon says, “No, I’m traveling light.”
Shaindel was flying home from Israel on a recent trip and looked rather haggard looking after getting off the plane walking into the customs area with eight children-- all under age 10. Collecting their many suitcases, the nine of them entered the cramped customs area. A young customs official watched the large entourage in disbelief, ''Ma'am,'' he said, ''do all these children and this luggage belong to you?''
''Yes, sir,'' Shaindel said with a weary sigh, ''they're all mine.''
The customs agent began his interrogation: ''Ma'am, do you have any weapons, contraband or drugs in your possession?''
''Sir,'' she calmly answered, ''if I'd had any of those items, I would have used them by now.''
My friend was arrested for stealing luggage from airport, his trial didn't last more than an hour
It was a brief case.
If my male child was being stubborn before a flight could I check him with my luggage? Or would I have to carry on my wayward son? (PS I love you if you got that one…)
At the airport today a man fainted and slumped over onto the luggage carousel. He slowly came around.
Airport police say that the number of people smuggling helium balloons in their luggage is under control. But cases continue to rise.
Yankel is a professional smuggler and every day he arrives at the border, on his bicycle with a sack on the luggage rack.
Customs officer: "Do you have something to declare?"
Yankel: "No."
Customs officer: "And what do you have in the sack?"
Yankel: "Sand."
During the check it turns out: actually sand. Every day for a whole week Yankel comes with the bike and the sack on the luggage rack. On the eighth day, the customs officer becomes suspicious.
Customs officer: "What do you have in the sack?"
Yankel: "Just sand."
Customs officer: "Hmm, let's see..."
This time, he sand is sifted. Result: just sand.
The man continues to visit the border every day. Two weeks later, the border guard has enough and sends the sand to the lab. Result: just sand. After another month of "sand transports", the customs officer can't stand it any longer and asks Yankel: "I'll give it to you in writing that I won't tell anybody, but you're smuggling something. Please tell me what!"
Yankel: "Bicycles..."
Berel, an older man is finally able to leave the Soviet Union in the late 1980s for the first time in his life. His wife and son have already left and settled in the States, and he's finally able to go and join them. On his way out through the Soviet border, the guard looks through his luggage and finds a bust of Lenin.
"What is this?" he asks.
"Don't ask me *what* this is, ask me *who* this! This is Vladimir Lenin, the great hero that fought for the rights of the people in our country, and I'm bringing him with me to remind myself to continue that battle in America!"
The guard lets him through, and he is able to go on the plane to America. Once he arrives, the American border guard goes through his luggage and finds the bust of Lenin.
"What is this?" he asks.
"Don't ask me *what* this is, ask me *who* this! This is Vladimir Lenin, the fiendish monster who destroyed my beautiful homeland! I am bringing him with me to remind myself the the mistakes of the past."
The guard lets him through, and he is able to go into the country, where he takes a taxi to the house his wife and son are staying. After reuniting with them, the son sees the bust of Lenin, and asks, "Papa, who is this?"
Berel smiles and says, "my son, don't ask me *who* this is, ask me *what* this! This, my son, is 18 pounds of gold!"
Why did the little knight put his lance in the luggage? For joust in case.
An Brit, a Frenchman, an Israeli, and a Palestinian are in a flight when one of the plane's engines fails.The crew throw all the luggage on the plane off to lighten the load, but they are still too heavy. The pilot goes on the intercom and says that 3 people need to jump off the plane to save everyone else. The Brit stands up and says, "God save the king!" before jumping to his death.
Next, the Frenchman gets up and says, "Viva la France!" before jumping to his death.
Next, the Israeli stands up, grabs the Palestinian by the shoulder, and shouts "Free Palestine from the River to the Sea!"
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The answer to this week's question is A– Baruch Hashem, another easy one. I like questions that I speak about a lot and even better the ones that I remember. So I speak about the 67' war a lot and of course knew Nasser was Prime Minister and enemy of Israel, as should know that as well. The Rabin, Hussein Clinton signing I actually remember. It's embedded in my memory. So I got that one right and the new score and am back in the passing zone is Rabbi Schwartz having a 9.5 point and the MOT having 3.5 point on this latest Ministry of Tourism exam.
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