Parenting 101 - Vayeira 2014/5775

Insights and Inspiration

from the

Holy Land
from

Rabbi Ephraim Schwartz

"Your friend in Karmiel"

November 7^th 2014 -Volume 5, Issue 3 -7^th  of Cheshvan 5775

Parshat Vayeira

Parenting 101

Parents disagree sometimes. We have an important role in life as Jewish parents. We are raising the next generation of our holy nation. It is they who will succeed and bring the world to its ultimate fulfillment on the slight chance that we don’t achieve that in our lifetime. Slight chance… of course. So charged with that important task, it's understandable that two very different people with two very different backgrounds and upbringings would have differing opinions on what is the best way to raise these children. How to discipline them, when they should go to sleep, how much emphasis should be put on their home and school work, what extra-curricular activities they should participate in, what is considered a healthy meal and what types of influence they should be exposed to.

 In the Schwartz family for example on the above issues without naming sides here, so as not to influence anyone's opinion here, there is one parent who believes in corporal punishment and yelling at their children when they get on his their nerves, who believes fundamentally in that wise adage of he who spares the rod spoils the child. Feels that bed time is when they conk out on the couch as long as they are not bothering him them. Believes that homework is very important and that the child should develop early on skills to do it on their own so that they will be better equipped to handle challenges in life-for the parent will not always be around to help them with it and that what would happen…? That same parent see's nothing wrong with chips, pizza and leftover chulent as containing all the basic elements of a nutritious meal and has no problem with extra-curricular activities that do not cost money like playing with lego (as long as it is cleaned up and not left all over the floor-all the time and running up and down the street a lot of times which is very good exercise and does not have to be boring and is really not that concerned about scary violent movies particularly Star Wars and Harry Potter which contain very spiritual elements and the secrets of the universe. The world is a scary place and it's about time they started getting used to it.

Then there's the other parent. Parent number two believes that it is important to talk to one's child repeatedly in soft and caring voice-even though they're not paying attention. Corporal punishment should only be used as threat in the least scary of term in only the most extreme situations and can be couched in innocuous phrases such as "you just wait until Parent one comes home". They also feel that bed-time should be a time of bonding with stories of educational value despite the fact that the rest of the house is falling apart and they might have to run a clothing sale the next day and parent one has no clean socks in his drawer. Meals should contain things like protein and stuff that grows from the ground preferably green and our children should take lessons in Piano, violin, art, karate and/or tai kwon do (which the other parent seemed to thing was some Chinese dish) , little league and horse therapy. Money is no object when it comes to offering our children the opportunity to find their hidden talents-as deeply buried as they may seem. The other parent does not appreciate violence of any nature either. It is from the dark side.

So how do you resolve these types of conflicts between two seemingly well-intentioned adults who want only the best for their children? In the Schwartz family it took some time and years until this was worked out. But it was finally decided that the parent that remembered when the children's birthdays were, how old they were and how many hours they sat in painful labor bringing them into this world should have more of a say than the other parent despite the fact that the other parent might have Rabbinic ordination and years of Talmudic wisdom and is really an excellent tour guide. There was some objection at first, but after a few vegetarian dinners and nights on the living room couch offered the right motivation. As long as I don't have to do the homework and can have my pizza and chips.

It seems that this disagreement about how to raise Jewish children really goes back to the beginning of our people-hood though. This week's Torah portion spends quite a bit of time and ink describing the first set of Jewish parents and their challenges and disagreements. Certainly when we study and learn about our Patriarchs and Matriarchs, who were the greatest individuals of all mankind, we can never attribute our petty foibles to their great and spiritual challenges and discussions. After-all Hashem never appeared to me and you. Yet the Torah means for us to learn from them. So let's take a look and see what we can find.

So we have Avraham, who in last week's portion was promised children that would become a great nation and yet his wife and life-partner Sarah remain barren. Sarah comes up with a kind of a novel out-of-the-box approach and recommends that her husband take their maid servant Hagar (no not the horrible guy from the cartoon) to be his wife, perhaps that will change their "karma" and she will then have children. Incidentally our sages tell us that Hagar was no simple cleaning lady, she was in fact the daughter of Pharaoh in Egypt that had tried to take Sarah to be his wife. So this was a girl with a royal upbringing. Which perhaps might explain why right after she immediately becomes pregnant she started acting like a JEP or Jewish Egyptian princess that she was-sorry I couldn't resist. Sarah-whose name actually means princess, obviously realizes that this is a problem and in no uncertain terms tells her dear husband that something must be done and Avraham after close to a century of marriage knows better to argue with the woman and Hagar is pretty much made to feel uncomfortable enough to flee. An angel appears to her and tells her to go back home, obviously this Hagar was not a simple person as well. After-all Sarah wouldn't just choose anyone to be her husband's wife.

Part two of this story takes place in this week's Torah portion after Sarah gives birth to Yitzchak and she begins to notice that Hagar's little Bar Mitzvah boy Yishmael is beginning to go down a path that would not be the best influence on little Yitzchak. Our sages note that when the Torah tells us that Yishmael was "playing" with Yitzchak the word playing was merely a polite euphemism for idolatry, murder and illicit relations. Not the best kid to have around in the home of someone who is destined to be by the end of the Parsha the pure offering to God and the grandfather of the tribes of Israel. In quite a memorable speech and with no room for any uncertainty Sarah tells Avraham

"Send away this maid servant and her son, for the son of this maid servant will not inherit with my son with Yitzchak."

It is not easy to miss the subtlety over here. Remember Yishmael is also Avraham's son. His oldest and first born child after 90 years of waiting. To the wife that his wife had given to him. Yet Sarah is quite clear. This is her son; the maid servant's son. As special as she may be she ain't your real wife and he ain't your real son. This is not what we are here to do. If you missed that the Torah is quite clear in the next verse

"And this matter seemed very bad to Avraham in regards to his son".

Now Avraham pretty much knew his children's birthday as well as Sarah did so there had to be another way to work this thing out. So Hashem steps in and who does He side with?

And Hashem said to Avraham 'It should not be bad in your eyes on the lad and on your maid-servant. All that Sarah says to you listen to her voice because it is through Yitzchak that will be called your seed.

O.K. so first of all note Hagar is not your wife, she is your maid-servant. Second of all the child is called the lad but Yitzchak is your real seed. And in case you didn't get it and feel bad Hashem continues

"And also the child of the maid-servant I will make a great nation for he is your seed"

Yishmael is not your child. He is the child of the maid servant, he is your seed though-although unlike Yitzchak your seed will not be called through him. But he will be great because of those good genes you gave him. Avraham, now having clarity on the situation rises the next morning and fulfills this test as well that Hashem placed before him and puts his faith in Hashem and sends Yishmael and Hagar out camping. Interestingly enough once again angels come rescue them for Hashem heard the crying of Yishmael and even more fascinating and quite the incredible epilogue of the story after passing of Sarah Avraham remarries Hagar and Yishmael himself is noted to have done Teshuvah and comes back to bury his beloved father. The extent of his Teshuva is so remarkable that one of our greatest sages-who's buried right up the road from us in Karmiel is none other than the great high priest Rabbi Yishmael Kohein Gadol. It seems that it became an acceptable and even righteous name to name ones children. Although I haven't heard it given recently…

Our sages though note something interesting about this first argument between parents about the raising of this first Jewish child. The first thing though to note is the special relationship between Avraham and Sarah. By none of the other Forefathers an Mothers does it refer to them in the same way as the Torah does Avraham and Sarah. For repeatedly Sarah is called Eishet Avraham Sarah the wife of Avraham. Rivka Rachel Leah are never referred to as the wife of_____ yet Sarah in almost every chapter is always connected to Avraham as his wife, his spouse, his partner. What's also fascinating as well as we don't as well find by the other Forefathers any fights or arguments about the raising of their children. Sure they each had their challenges. Esau was no picnic and neither were the 12 tribes and the Fathers and Mothers certainly had different approaches and opinions on how to raise them. Yet it is only by the husband and wife team of Avraham and Sarah that the Torah shares with us that there was disagreement and even conversation and communication about how to deal with the raising of their child. Lesson one perhaps you have to be a team a dedicated husband and wife and then it is alright to disagree about how best to raise the children. Perhaps that is even the only way that critical communication can happen.

But what were they arguing about. What was the essence of their debate. Did Sarah, the paradigm of kindness, who welcomed every guest into her home night and day-pagan or not and who even gave this woman who was the daughter of her oppressor to her husband begrudge her? It doesn't resonate and the Torah which never hesitates to share the flaws of our great people doesn't make any mention of any jealousy. And Avraham, what was he thinking? Did he not recognize that Yitzchak was his son that was meant to inherit him, and that having Yishmael who was certainly a pretty bad and perhaps even dangerous kid around needed to be sent to some rehab center somewhere? What's the real story here?

So once again our sages shed some light unto this story as they note that Hashem commands Avraham to listen to all that Sarah said to him-hinting that there was another conversation that took place. And they share with us that Avraham told Sarah I understand that you want me to send him away. But what will all the people say? Avraham who was preaching kindness for so many years sends away his oldest son and the wife that he raised to such heights! It will be a desecration of Hashem's name. And we are here to honor Hashem's name to create a world that honors Hashem. Sarah counters this argument but Yitzchak is the one with who the nation will come from and it is critical that he not be connected in any way to the desecration of Hashem's name that Yishmael is causing. Let Hashem once again judge and tell us what the right path to take is. And it is here that Hashem steps in and tells Avraham that just as in the last incident when Hagar had to be sent away, listen to all Sarah says for it is through Yitzchak that your descendants and that nation will come.

It is truly an amazing portion and insight into the building of the Jewish name from these two great individuals who for years had been focused on spreading the word of Hashem and His light to the world. Avraham-the man is focused on the big picture. We have a job to do. We may have to curtail our own spiritual perfection and environment with some less savory for Yishmael is also my son…also Hashem's son. We have to do whatever we can to increase Hashems glory despite the challenge. Sarah, though understands that the big picture of reaching out to the world is no longer the priority. The priority is creating a family and a nation that will inherit the legacy and fulfill the destiny of Avraham. In this case the purity of that family and the danger of any influence that would detract from Yitzchaks ability to grow to be the second of the Patriarch is of paramount concern. It is only after that is accomplished that Yishmael and Hagar will be able to once again return and only then can they achieve the greatness that they are meant to achieve and become.

It is not easy raising Jewish children. But our forefathers and mothers have set the path for us. One thing that is certain and that is found by all of our Patriarchs is that there are challenges involved. There are doubts, there are two paths that can be taken and there are sometimes conflicting priorities that have to be weighed. Yet when faced with those challenges ultimately we have to recognize that we are never alone. We are engaged in holy work, perhaps the holiest work and therefore we know that we have Hashem that is there to help us and guide us. Perhaps the greatest lesson is in how we have to know to turn to Him when faced with those challenges and question. Our Father in Heaven has quite a bit of experience with children that don't always turn out the way he wanted them to. Yet He is still there for us. For it is through us and our children that ultimately His name will be sanctified.

Have a positively grand Shabbos,

Rabbi Ephraim Schwartz

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RABBI SCHWARTZ'S  FAVORITE QUOTE OF THE WEEK

“The first 45 years of Parenting are the hardest.” – a Jewish mother (hi momJ)

"I am your Fathaaar"-Darth Vader JJ

RABBI SCHWARTZ'S TOUR GUIDE EXAM QUESTION OF THE WEEK

(answer below at end of Email)

 Q.  Which of the following was a Bilu’im settlement?

A.    Rishon LeTsiyon

B.     Motsa

C.     Gedera

D.    Rosh Pina

 RABBI SCHWARTZ'S COOL MIDRASH OF THE WEEK  

"And Hashem opened the eyes of Hagar and She saw the well"-Everyone has the status of a blind person for a man only sees as much as Hashem allows him to see. Until Hashem comes and opens up our eyes  for even though the well was near Hagar she only became aware of it when Hashem opened up her eyes.

Bereishit Rabba (it has been proven in the Schwartz family as well as there is a tradition that the recitation of this Midrash works when you lose something to help you find it)

RABBI SCHWARTZ'S COOL THINGS TO DO  IN ISRAEL OF THE WEEK

Remembering the Holocaust – The modern State of Israel was built upon the ashes of the holocaust. And there are quite a few museums that one can visit to learn and to memorialize the 6 million Jews that perished in during World War II. Most famous of course is Yad Vashem which is perhaps the most moving and comprehensive memorial in the world, its historical museum and video testimonials are overwhelming and moving. The children's monument, coomunities and heroes monuments are also very powerful and if you have time certainly the archives are the place to research relatives who may have been there. However besides Yad Vashem there are some samller and just as meaningful musuems. The Ghetto Fighters museum right outside of Akko and the childrens museum was the first museum in Israel and is also very powerful. Yad Mordechai in the South tells the story of the Warsaw Ghetto  and Mordechai Anilevitz where one can learn about the Resistance. And in the old city of Jerusalem by Mount Zion there is the Martef HaShoah the Holocaust chamber which contains a memorial cemetery with tombstones dedicated to communities  that have perished as well as a powerful historical timeline of the history of anti-Semitism that preceded the holocaust. In general I prefer to visit places that uplift and connect with the life of Israel  yet a trip to Israel and a true appreciation of our country and how fortunate we are when we remember our ancestors who never merited to realize the dream of coming here.

RABBI SCHWARTZ'S  COOL YOUTUBE CLIP OF THE WEEK

Funny different Parenting approaches from the classic 70's

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zh1zIx-qidE

And from the king of Fatherhood and Parenting the great Bill Cosby

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_5jKKN5v6yA  

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RABBI SCHWARTZ'S FUNNY TOP TEN LIST OF  OF THE WEEK

I know it's a week late..but still goodJ…

IF JEWS CELEBRATED HALLOWEEN- THE HALACHOS (LAWS)

1) No trick or treating until sundown. This year not before 5:54PM in the NY area. Children may trick or treat earlier for Chinuch (educational purposes), but it’s preferable if they wait until the zman.

2) A scary costume is preferable, but b’dieved (2nd choice), one dressed as a princess or a Minion has fulfilled the obligation of dressing up.

3) One who turns off the lights and pretends to be away is called a sinner!

4) Shaving cream used for tricks does not require kosher supervision.

5) If Halloween falls out on Shabbat (like this year), trick or treating within the eruv (a string around the city allowing Jews to carry outdoors on Shabbat) is permissible. If there is no eruv, one still trick or treats, but the custom is to cut a hole in bottom of the plastic jack o’ lantern so the candy goes to waste.

6) To be considered a trick, one must damage property valued at at least one perutah (approx. 5 cents). A trick must also inconvenience the victim by at least 6.7 minutes. In case of emergency, there is a lenient position of 4.8 minutes one may be allowed to rely on. Consult your Halachikauthority (your Rabbi).

7) The pumpkin should be placed on the top step, to the right of the door.
It is preferable to use a real pumpkin as a jack o’ lantern. B’dieved (2nd choice), plastic is also acceptable.

9) One does not make a blessing before trick or treating, because it is not certain that the homeowner will be home. (And one may not utter Gd’s name in vain.)

10) When giving candy, one must give an amount at least the size of an olive (about five candy corns.) Some are of the opinion that it has to be at least the size of an egg (twelve candy corns.) This opinion is preferable.

11) When egging cars, one should be careful not to drop any eggs prior to throwing them. Remember, Ba’al Tashchis (the sin of wasting)!

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Answer is C:  BILU was a small group of Jewish Socialist idealogues and students that moved to Israel in the late 1800's motivated to aquire land in Israel (which they were not able to own in Russia) and to create a socialist society. They called themselves Bilu based on the verse Beit Yacov Lichu VaNelcha- the house of Jacob shall go and we shall go forth from Isaiah. The end of that verse that they failed to mention was we shall go forth in the light of Hashem…the group which never was more than 50 people landed in Mikve Yisrael one of the early religious settlements and then moved to Rishon. However the first settlement they established was in Gedera which ultimately failed. Many of them went back to Russia or died of starvation and disease and some enede up joining some the kibbutz movements that started. Only one of them survived to see the establishment of the State of Israel

Super Mom- Lech Lecha 5775/2014

Insights and Inspiration

from the

Holy Land
from

Rabbi Ephraim Schwartz

"Your friend in Karmiel"

October 31^st  2014 -Volume 5, Issue 2 -7^th  of Cheshvan 5775

Super Mom

She is probably one of the most awesome women in the Jewish world today. Rebbetzin Lori Palatnik, has become a household name and revered figure and role model for many women in the Jewish world today as a women who not only lives an inspiring Jewish life but is determined to take that personal inspiration and share it with the Jewish world. For a woman in her mere early 50's who was not raised as an observant Jew, Lori has created quite a remarkable track record. Together with her husband Rabbi Yaakov, they founded Jewish outreach centers and synagogues in Toronto, Denver and Washington DC, she has authored books, has video blogs on Aish.com that has tens of thousands of viewers and has thousands of students worldwide that have re-connected to the faith and heritage of their ancestors.

Her most recent project that is truly transforming the Jewish world and that I was privileged as a tour guide to participate in this past week is called the Jewish Women's Renaissance Project (JWRP). The program was developed with the appreciation that it is women and particularly Jewish mothers that possess the power to build and transform the Jewish home. Over the past 6 years thousands of women have come to Israel on this very heavily subsidized "birthright" for women. The conditions to be eligible for the program is merely that one be non-shabbat observant, emotionally and physically healthy and 90% of the women have children under the age of 18 at home. The trip contains classes and sessions about spirituality, relationships, Torah ideas and insights into meaningful mitzvot and some of their concepts such as Shabbat, prayer, and Mikva. They also incorporate along the trip truly moving experiences meeting with soldiers, projects of chesed and meetings with inspirational individuals from all walks of Jewish life. Best of all of course is the great and fantastic tour guides J that truly feel privileged to show them and connect them to their land and heritage as we traverse Israel from top to bottom together.

Lori says "When people ask me 'how can I leave my children for 9 days?' I tell them you're not leaving your children-you're going for your children…for their future for everything that they will learn and be inspired from you for the rest of their lives."

In the Jewish educational outreach world that I was fortunate enough to be part of in my journeys across the States, in New York, Iowa, Virginia and Seattle, Lori is considered the "queen of Kiruv/outreach. Her love and passion for every Jew and her determination to provide everyone of our brothers and sisters who may have never experienced the true beauty of our rich heritage with the opportunity to do so inspired us to do more…to connect more…to live more inspired ourselves. But the truth although Lori may be the queen the Father and Mother of Jewish life and inspiration make their introduction to us right from the start in this week's Torah portion in the figures of our first Patriarch and Matriarch Avraham and Sarah.

The Torah does not tell us much of Avraham and Sarah's early lives. We are introduced to the them in their 70's this week with Hashem's commandment to them to pick up and leave their birthplace and dwelling place and parents home and go to the "land I shall show you"; The first Rennasaince project ever. What were they doing until then? The Torah doesn't tell us but it does drop a very subtle hint when it tells us that they went and they took with them their orphaned nephew Lot and all of their possession "and the souls that they made in Haran". Hmmmm…how do you make souls? Rashi, our greatest commentator who in general explains what he refers to as the simplest understanding of the text, quotes the Midrash that Avraham and Sarah had spent the past years where they dwelt bringing the people of the world under the 'wings of the Divine'. They were involved in the outreach business it seems. According to Maimonides there were 10's of thousands that left the pagan world and idolatry and joined the troops of Avraham and Sarah. What is even more  fascinating is that Avraham and Sarah did all of this without any word or acknowledgement from Hashem. No prophecy, No word of God speaking to them. Without even any teachers. They discerned Hashem and brought the concept of monotheism and a caring loving God that interacts and watches over all of his Creation merely by the fact that it's obvious. The world doesn't make sense otherwise. So much beauty, wonder, good, incredible intricacies of every nuance of our existence existing and continuing to function couldn't be here and function without such a Creator. And from there it all started.

Yet the words of the Torah our deep and there is even something more significanct in the words the Torah chose in describing what Avraham and Sarah did with the their students. It doesn't say the souls they converted or the souls they inspired or even the souls that they taught, when referring to these students. The word the Torah uses is the souls that they made. One of my teachers once explained this strange term with a concept that Nachmanides elaborates when he discusses our forefathers is that what our Patriarchs and Matriarchs truly did was to create Jewish DNA. To light up those natural genes that we have that connect to God and embed them within our Jewish souls. All of the actions and stories, Nachamanides suggests, that the torah tells us about our forefathers and their experiences are really stories about us. Avraham goes down to Egypt, he is rescued and comes out, their acts of kindness, the battles, their struggles and challenges even the test and request which was not carried of having to sacrifice of our children rather than abandoning our faith. All of it was just making our souls, making our DNA.

Now although we all have that special soul, and we recognize that in each of our daily prayers when we connect to Hashem by beginning our conversations with Him as the children of our Patriarchs and Matriarchs, it doesn't end there. Each and every one of us are meant to ignite and "turn on the spiritual DNA for our own children and the souls throughout the world that we are meant to "make". We have parents and ancestors that have done that for us. Somewhere somehow if you are reading this E-Mail you are connected to Jewishly (at least the Jews areJ) and that is because you must have had someone who prayed and ignited those sparks in your DNA and kept those initial sparks of Avraham and Sarah dormant enough for you to realize them and then share them and pass them down yourself.

Until a few years ago if you would have asked Lori who ignited her sparks, she would have said it was her Rabbi, Rabbi Noach Weinberg O"BM who should met when she came to Aish Hatorah on a trip many years ago. However a few years back Lori, through what can only be described as Divine providence, connected with a relative that she never knew she had done some family research of their mutual great-grandmother. It seems that her great-grandparents lived in a small Polish Shtetl of Ivansk that was quite impoverished. There were no schools, places of study, or even Rabbis or teachers in the town and so the town got together and chipped in to hire a Melamed/ a children's Judaics teacher in order that the children would be able to get their basic Jewish education. After many months though it seems the money ran dry and the it reached a point where the Melamed announced to the town that unless they came up with money he would have no choice but to leave and find other employment somewhere else. Lori's great-grandmother was heartbroken and she together with the townspeople pleaded with him to stay for the sake of their children. However having no funds and no choice the melamed packed his belongings and boarded the wagon to leave.

The townsfolk came to say their final tearful good-byes to the man who had served so faithfully and given them and their children so much for so long on his meager stipend when suddenly a commotion was heard. A woman had lain down on the street in front of the wagon and refused to get up. With tears and screams Lori's great-grandmother exclaimed "If my children cannot study Hashem's holy Torah, I have no reason to live. Let me be trampled to death. Without the knowledge that my children will have our heritage, our special gift from Hashem, I cannot bear to go on.. The people were shocked and tried to prevail upon her to get up, but she refused to move. As a crowd gathered they were so inspired and taken aback that they all agreed that somehow someway they would figure out a way to come up with the funds. The melamed himself as well so moved by this woman's self-sacrifice also stepped down and announced that he would stay. The relative of Lori's told her that when he heard this story it was the start of his return to the faith of his ancestors for as his Rabbi told him "it is in the merit of that righteous woman and her sacrifice that you unlike so many of the rest of your assimilated brothers and sisters was given the opportunity to once again find your way home".

Later that evening when Lori who was so moved by this story of her great-grandmother called her father to find out if this story was in fact true, he confirmed telling her that he heard it as well when he was a child but never bothered to tell her because he didn't feel it was too important. When Lori asked if he knew any other stories that he might share, her father said that he didn't. But then rather nonchalantly he mentioned "You know, come to think of it, Lori, you were named after…her name was Leibe Rachel". The spark that almost flickered and went out had been so strongly embedded by Leibe Rachel it just took some time until it was reignited once again. We are not leaving our children….We are going and doing for our children for their future for everything that they will learn and be inspired from us for the rest of their lives…"

Have a remarkable Shabbos,

Rabbi Ephraim Schwartz

This week's E-Mail has been dedicated by my dear friends Carl and Helen Grossman of Seattle Washington upon the occasion of their 19^th anniversary this past week. We miss you guys here in Israel and look forward to you visiting us. May Hashem continue to bless the two of you with many many more happy years together filled with health, joy, happiness, inspiration and nachas from your children!

Mazel Tov

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RABBI SCHWARTZ'S  FAVORITE QUOTE OF THE WEEK

“There are two things that are infinite, the universe and man's stupidity..... And I am not sure about the universe.” – Albert Einstein

RABBI SCHWARTZ'S TOUR GUIDE EXAM QUESTION OF THE WEEK

(answer below at end of Email)

 Q.  During the 12^th century the Crusaders built a system of fortifications for the purpose of laying siege to:

A.    Gaza

B.     Jerusalem

C.     Ashkelon

D.    Akko

 New feature!-last year we did Gematria which is the Remez portion of Torah this year we start Drash enjoy!

RABBI SCHWARTZ'S COOL MIDRASH OF THE WEEK  

 After Avraham wins the battle of the 4 kings and rescues his nephew Lot he was concerned that he had used up his merits and Hashem responded that he had nothing to fear for because of his great faith all of his reward would be intact and he would even be granted a child. When Avraham objected that it had been forseen by astrologers in the stars that he was not destined to have children. Hashem told him to forget about the stars and the forces of the Zodiac that control the world for Avraham and his descendants are above all of that and are only controlled by direct Divine decree.

The Midrash then shares a story of how Rabbi Yochanan Ben Zakkai and Rabbi Yannai were listening to two astrologers who pointed at a group of workers and foretold that two particular ones destiny as told in the stars was to be bitten by a poisonous snake and die that very die. When they came back alive, like every good Rabbi would do, the two sages went back to the astrologers and said "Didn't you predict their demise was foretold in the stars" The astrologers then asked the men if they did something special that particular day. When they responded that the recited the Shema and morning prayers as they did daily before going to work. The astrologers responded
"Ahh you are Jews, the predictions of astrologers do not apply to you people"

Shabbat 156A

RABBI SCHWARTZ'S COOL THINGS TO DO  IN ISRAEL OF THE WEEK

(New year figure we'll offer a new feature-Let me know what you think)

Hiking – Sure there are lots of places around the world to hike but Israel is the only country where you get a mitzvah for hiking. As many of our sages suggest that anyone who walks four cubits in the land of Israel is fulfilling the commandment of settling the land. Why? Because when we walk around we are showing that it is ours, Hashem gave it to us. We are not leaving it abandoned and we are appreciating this beautiful gift. In addition Its pretty cool when you hike in this country that you are literally walking in the footsteps of our ancestors who lived here and explored the land just as we are doing today for thousands of years. That's pretty awesome as well! There are really fantastic hikes in Israel that are there for everyone; water hikes, desert hikes, mountains valleys hidden springs, challenging extreme ones and easy stuff for the whole family. Two very popular extreme Israeli hikes are the sea to sea hike width-wise across the country from the Mediterranean to the Kineret/sea of Galile, although I have seen quite a few American Yeshiva guys doing this over the summer break and vacation this is a pretty fun 2-3 day hike. The other more typical Israel one is a few weeks or more and that is the top to bottom Shvil Yisrael/Israel trail that starts up at Tel Dan in the North and ends by Eilat which is not a straight shot but stops along the way across many historical sites. The trails in Israel are usually fairly well taken care of and marked with colored paint markings on rocks along the way and are all of lots of fun. Just remember take water and drink and make sure people know where you are when your exploring Hashems favorite country…your country.  

RABBI SCHWARTZ'S  COOL YOUTUBE CLIP OF THE WEEK

Check out the Lori Palatnik's JWRP tour!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qso8RPVpBmo

And guys don't feel bad theres a new JWRP program for men as well it's called Momentum here's the preview

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p2mCrWpZr9Q

and lots of personal moving testimonials..

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XDV9YzN9Rqk&list=PLmbPqkDCQ9pOdxCd9fHH1cBqMsbKXrFt4 ******************* 

RABBI SCHWARTZ'S JOKE  OF THE WEEK

Two brothers are terrible trouble makers. They are always breaking things, stealing things, lying, and making all kinds of general trouble. The parents have tried everything to get the boys to change, to no avail. Finally, out of options, they ask the Rabbi if he can help. He says he will talk to the boys, but only one at a time. The parents drop off the youngest and go home, promising to return to get him soon. The boy sits in a chair across from the pastor's desk and they just look at each other.

Finally, the Rabbi says, "Where is God?"

The boy just sits there and doesn't answer.

The Rabbi begins to look stern and loudly says, "Where is God?"

The Rabbi is starting to get angry at the boy's refusal to converse and practically shouts "Where is God?"

To the Rabbi's surprise, the little boy jumps up out of his chair and runs out of the office.

The boy leaves the synagogue and runs all the way home, up the stairs and into his brother's room. He shuts the door and pants, "We're in BIG TROUBLE. God's missing and they think we did it"

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Answer is C:  Hate to say this but this one stumped me. Frankly I hate the Crusaders. Really lousy jew murdering people. So I kind of zoned out by the nitty gritty details of their battles and sieges and the to be fully honest here shhhh…I hav never toured Ashkelon which is the correct answer here. But there is a bit of process of deduction that would have been possible here. Jerusalem is not correct because the Crusaders conquered it in 1099-not the 12^th century. Akko was the Crusader capital during the later Crusades and the Crusaders built the city and its immense fortifications but not to make siege rather to protect themselves from attacks. Gaza was conquered by the Crusaders and built up-(not that I've toured there either) but Ashkelon was held by the arabs for quite a while and they would launch attacks on the Crusaders from there so the Crusaders built fortifications to keep their on them and eventually seized and conquered them. I'm wondering though if this question is a mistaken Hebrew and English translation because the Hebrew question was that the Crusaders built fortifications in order לכתר or in English L'Kater which of the following cities and as far as I know L'kater would mean to crown the city not siege it but who knows? Any Hebrew speaking tour guides know if this question was right or wrong on the exam?

Righteous, man!-Noach 5775/2014

Insights and Inspiration

from the

Holy Land
from

Rabbi Ephraim Schwartz

"Your friend in Karmiel"

October 24^th  2014 -Volume 5, Issue 1 -30^th  of Tishrei 5775

Parshat Noach

Righteous, man!

It was a random call. I was building my Sukkah, getting ready for the chag in the few spare moments I had in between my tours, but hey you gotta answer the phone because ya never know. "Hi", the sweet voice on the line said. "I was referred to you as someone who does tours around Israel." I like calls that start off that way J. "Sure" I said "what can I help you with?"

"Well I'm here with some friends of mine and we were wondering, if you take people to tzadikim", 

she asked.

"All the time", I said. Now I had already began to develop a client profile in my mind. These were probably a few girls or young women obviously Orthodox yeshiva oriented. Probably have been back in the States after their "year" in seminary who probably have not yet found their bashert/soulmate yet, and most likely have saved up some money to come to Israel and visit some of the graves of some of our holy righteous people/tzadikim where they could pray in a meaningful way for their hearts desires. I've done those kind of tours. Many have even found their bashert. (Funny aside anecdote; Once on one of these types of trips the girl in the car afterwards starts having a conversation with her mother back in the States about her future Mother-in-Law. Man! I thought and told her, I know these prayers work but that was pretty fast. She explained through peals of laughter that she was actually engaged before the trip already and was just coming to pray for her upcoming wedding…But yes she had gotten engaged not long after praying here in Israel.)

Anyways although I had read these clients right, it became very clear a few minutes into the conversation as she began giving me the names of the places and people she wanted visit that I had had a misunderstanding. Because as far as I knew all the tzadikim that they had mentioned were actually all still alive and well.

"Oh" I said "you mean you want to visit live tzadikim. I didn't understand", I apologized. "I'm sorry I don't do those types of tours." Now don't get me wrong. I have the greatest respect and awe for many of the great righteous people that I truly believe it is in whose merit, Torah study, kind deeds, and prayers that Hasem sustains the world and continues to shine favor and mercy on us. I also have tremendous faith that their blessings and prayers on our behalf do have the power to bring mercy and beneficence down from heaven. I just don't do those types of tours. Personally, it's because I respect them so much and the value of their Torah that I don't want to trouble them with photo ops with young bar mitzvah boys and tourists all the time. In addition I hate waiting on long lines particularly on hot sweaty days in small waiting rooms. I do however know some great tour guides that specialize in this type of tour. They are great in jumping over poor widows, orphans, homeless and sickly people that are looking blessing, comfort and salvation and sneaking their well- paying tourists into the "backdoor" so that they can get their quicky bracha and traditional picture without having to wait. It's just not my thing. Now dead Tzadikim are something else. I'm fine with that . I just don't really do the live ones.

So we cleared up the misunderstanding. I think she kind of felt the way I do by the time we finished our conversation. She decided to opt for the dead tzadikim tour. Truth is, I was booked anyways but I happily gave her instructions on how and where to go and of course concluded our conversation with my personal blessing and best wishes to her and her friends. As far as I know she's not engaged yet. But if she does get engaged soon, you're all free to E-Mail me for a blessing as well J.

This week's Torah portion begins with the well-known story of the first Tzadik of the world.And Noach was and Ish Tzadik- a righteous man, Tamim Haya B'dorosuv- He was complete/perfect in his generation. Like all good tzadikim,( particularly Jewish ones-although Noach was actually pre-Jews and Jewish), right away your commentaries and sages start to note and question and critique. Maybe he was only righteous in his generation where there pretty much wasn't any competition because pretty much everyone was pretty bad. But had he lived in a better generation like Abraham's then as the guys in the back of the shul would say "Ehh"  he wouldn’t be anything special. As the saying goes you can't please everyone all the time. But the truth of the matter is as many of the commentaries note this is the first time in the first 1500 years of the history of the world and in the Torah that someone is called a Tzadik. And as the great Gaon of Vilna notes if you truly want to understand a Hebrew word and concept one needs to go back to the beginning when it is first mentioned. So what is a Tzadik? How would you define someone who is righteous?

It's interesting that the word Tzadik is the same root as two other words that are seemingly opposite concepts. The first is Tzedaka which generally we translate as charity. The second word is Tzedek which is translated as justice. It would seem that these two concepts are polar opposites. Justice is when I get something I deserve and charity is something I either give or receive when it is undeserved. The truth though our sages tell us is that the two concepts are really the same. For in truth why does one person have and another not? Is it fair? He should have the big fancy house and car and I should be driving my jalopy and another living in squalor. The answer is that all that we have is undeserved. We have done nothing to receive or earn our lives, our health and our wealth. It is all from above. It is all from the our Father in heaven. Our job in this world is to recognize that since we are the recipients of His kindness we are meant to share and give that light and love with others that do not have it. This is justice. This is charity. This is what being a Tzadik truly means. One who can share and teach a world that our lives are truly blessings and that we are here to become God-like by in turn becoming givers to the world in connecting them with that basic principle of life. It is fascinating that we find many places where Hashem as well is referred to as a Tzadik; for He is the source of all righteous-ness. Being a Tzadik means connecting to that which is right. Righteous, man!

One last interesting idea about a Tzadik that I understood on one of my many tours down to the Dead Sea area, where not too many Tzadikim live, not too many people either. But there are a lot of Palm trees there. And it is a fascinating thing about plam trees. You see unlike other trees, palm trees grow in the worst possible conditions such as the Dead Sea, where there are tons of them. Palm trees grow with barely any water or rainfall. They can withstand extreme heat, terrible soil and in fact I was told that the saltier and worse the sand they grow in is the sweeter the dates are. King David in his psalm about the day of Shabbos writes that a Tzadik flourishes like a date palm. The Tzadik is someone who can grow in the worst conditions. The two biblical figures that are referred to as Tzadikim are Noach and Joseph. Noach lived in the absolute worst place and time. A world filled with licentiousness, thievery, corruption and just plain evil. It is there that he became a Tzadik. Similarly Joseph who grew up far away from the yeshivas and religious community of his brother and father, but rather in the home of Pharaoh in Egypt of all places, what our sages refer to as the source of all Tumah/impurity and idolatry. There he becomes Yosef Ha'Tzadik. A tzadik doesn't neccesarily have to grow and flourish only in Bnai Brak, Lakewood Boro Park or Jerusalem. A Tzadik is someone who can flourish like a Tamar/ a date palm in the places where he can most impact the world and continue to grow, thrive and inspire.

This Shabbos Jews around the world have chosen to dedicate to sharing perhaps our most special gift from Hashem; the gift of Shabbos. Shabbos, the day that we recite this Psalm of King David, we recognize that V'Ameich Kulam Tzadikim- Hashem's nation are all truly righteous. Tens of thousands of Jews across the world will turn off their phones, their computers their "social" media and celebrate Shabbos as a day when we refrain from all acts of creative activity in order to bask in a world that has a Creator. Many Jews and organizations that observe a traditional Shabbos regularly will be sharing this Shabbos with many of our brothers and sisters who have yet to appreciate the beauty of this special day. It is a weekend that we can all become Tzadikim. But it was never meant to be "just one Shabbos". It was meant to be a world full of Shabbos. Shabbos is the day which we are told brings all the blessing to the world. You may not have a Tzadik that lives next to you or a tour guide that can take you to, one either dead or alive, but we all have Shabbos with which to receive that ultimate blessing from our Father who is the source of it all. May this Shabbos be the beginning of many more blessed ones to come.

Shabbat Shalom and Chodesh Tov,

Rabbi Ephraim Schwartz

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RABBI SCHWARTZ'S  FAVORITE  QUOTES OF THE WEEK

"The Pure Tzadkim do not decry wickedness rather they increase righteousness, they do not decry heresy rather they increase faith, they do not decry ignorance rather they increase wisdom  ." Rav Avraham Yitzchak HaKohein Kook

RABBI SCHWARTZ'S TOUR GUIDE EXAM QUESTION OF THE WEEK

(answer below at end of Email)

 Q.  During which period were ossuaries (gluskemaot) used for burial in the Land of Israel?

a.       First and Second Temple

b.      Chalcolithic and Second Temple

c.       Bronze and Hellenistic

d.      Second Temple and Crusader

 New feature!-last year we did Gematria which is the Remez portion of Torah this year we start Drash enjoy!

RABBI SCHWARTZ'S COOL MEDRASH OF THE WEEK  

 When Hashem commanded Noach "two of each you shall bring in the ark" all creatures came in pairs.

Sheker/Falsehood also wanted to come in. Noach said to him "You can't come in without mate"

As he was searching for a mate he met Tragedy

"From where are you coming from?" asked Tragedy

"I come from Noach's ark I wanted to enter but was refused because I have no mate. Do you want to be my mate?"

"Gladly," replied Tragedy "but what do I get in return?"

"Whatever I aquire you may take"

"A deal" said Tragedy

So Sheker/falsehood and Tragedy entered the ark together in an eternal partnership that whatever Falsehood acquires Tragedy takes it away.

Yalkut Shimoni

RABBI SCHWARTZ'S COOL THINGS TO DO  IN ISRAEL OF THE WEEK

(New year figure we'll offer a new feature-Let me know what you think)

Visiting graves of Tzadikim – Yes there is a whole tourist market for this. Jewish tradition tells us that dating back to the time of the first Jewish visitors/tourist to this country our ancestors  Joshua and Caleb who spied out the land before we moved here stopped off in Hebron to pray by the graves of our forefathers. And Jews have been coming since. However just to clarify this fascinating practice many of our sages explain that we as Jews (as opposed to other religions) believe that we only pray to Hashem, not his "son" or prophets or cows and not even to his righteous tzadikim. We have a direct line and we do not require any intermediaries. Rather graves of the righteous are a place to go to pray to Hashem because being within the proximity of  the tzadik who is buried there is meant to inspire our prayers and in the merit of us connecting with that tzadik who served Hashem our power of prayer becomes strengthened. In addition we can beseech the soul of the Tzadik to implore before Hashem for his children in addition to our own prayers. Throughout Israel there are many graves of many of our greatest sages, as well as our Patriarchs, Matriarchs and many of our biblical figures many of the traditions of their burial places go back hundreds and in some cases over a thousand years. Many of the graves are painted blue and I am told that the reason for this is to remind us as the blue string on our tzitzit fringes do to adjust our eyes and hearts to heaven as the tzadik who guides us did rather than to mistakenly pray to the tzadik. Spending a whole day visiting graves is not for everyone, but a trip to Israel should certainly include a trip to some of these holy places as well.

RABBI SCHWARTZ'S  COOL YOUTUBE CLIP OF THE WEEK

The official Shabbat project and how it looked last year in South Africa where it first started!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xhfe-MZcCjE

An interesting and cute take on what can happen this Shabbos…

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p2mCrWpZr9Q

Hey Even Paula Abdul is into it

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q5PpWG4offU

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RABBI SCHWARTZ'S TOP NINE LIST  OF THE WEEK

TOP NINE Noach Facebook Updates

9. "I can't believe my wife, she only packed one bottle of Fabreeze???" 8.  "Note to self: never put unicorns in the same cage as lions" 7.  "Looking for a shidduch for my son Ham, tough kid to setup with a name like that" 6.  Noah was tagged in the album "Animal House" 5.  "Lions, Tigers and Bears, Oy Veh!" 4.  Shuffleboard upper deck, who's in? 3.  Noah likes rainbows 2.  "New Expression: 'Save it for a Sunny Day'" 1.  "Anyone find Earth on Google Earth?"

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Answer is B:  This was a pretty tricky question as the copper (chalcolite) period and the second temple are ae a few thousand years apart. But yet it is during those periods where we find people doing a two part burial. First in the ground and a cave and then after a year the bones would be gathered and placed in a box made of clay or stone or whatever and put in a family plot plot. The gemara talks about this and discusses whether it is a happy occasion or mourning. There are some that suggest as well that this is one of the sources for the recitation of Kaddish for a year or the placing of a tombstone at that point as tradition has it that after a year the soul is elevated and has finished its atonement.