from the
Holy Land
from
Rabbi Ephraim Schwartz
"Your friend in Karmiel"
November 6th 2026 -Volume 17 Issue 5 26th of Cheshvan 5787
Parshat Chayei Sarah
Click here below for print edition
(Weekly Newsletter - Parshat Chayei Sarah 2026 )
I'm not a patient person. I want things now. I'm a fast food guy. I have places to go. Things to do. Sites to see. Work to accomplish. I don't have time to kratz around. I don't like lines. I don't like waiting. I look at my phone to see how long this is shlepping out. It's been ten minutes already. How long to I have to sit here? What's taking them so long? C'mon, already… Doesn't anyone else here have a life?
Don't get me wrong. I enjoy down time too. Just last week I went away for the week to Mitzpe Ramon, which was glorious and I just sat and chilled, with nothing to do or no where to go. It was amazing. I don't have to always be on the move, and I can relax perhaps even better than most. I'm the king of relaxing and chilling. Yet, I have to be in that mode. When it's not relaxation time, then I'm on. And there is too much to do to be wasting my time waiting.
Perhaps the most frustrating place where that plays out is while sitting in traffic. I hate, hate, hate traffic. Standstill traffic. Watching that stupid annoying Waze thing just adding minutes and minutes to my destination arrival. I'd rather get up two hours early and drive at 4:00 AM to Jerusalem and make it there in an hour and a half, than wake up at 7:00 and take chances that it could turn into a three hour drive, just sitting and inching behind cars along the Highway. What do I do in Jerusalem when I arrive there at 5:30? I have no clue. But at least I'm not sitting in traffic.
I don't think, I'm alone in this way. In fact I don't know many that don't like quick service. That don't want immediate gratification. That don't marvel when their plane arrives early. When there are no lines in the store. When you call for customer service and they pick up right away and deal with your problem immediately instead of putting you on hold with that really annoying and frustrating horrible music or advertisement for their company again and again and again for 20 minutes just to find out that you've been waiting for the wrong department and "please-hold-on-a-second-as-we-connect-you to-the-person-that-will-assist-you". And then finally when you get connected to the right person-after waiting another 20 minutes, having the phone disconnect. Yeah… being able to marvel at that not happening to me, hasn't happened yet… Certainly, not in Israel.
But, we're all like that. I know that many will say it's our self and immediate gratification generation… yada yada… but I don't buy it. I don't think anyone ever wanted to wait for anything. Sure, we've gotten faster results. And we wait less. But that's happened because people never liked to wait. Remember that whiny sound from AOL for the computer to connect to the internet which took a few seconds. Today we can't wait three seconds to skip the YouTube commercial. We have instant hot water- except for in Israel where you have to wait for the Dood to heat up. But even years ago, the invention of the microwave, was because people couldn't wait. They didn't like to. None of us do. And that's what moved the world faster and faster and to greater and greater efficiency. I believe that's a good thing. I'm not of the team that says we need to go back to the old more peaceful waiting for things years…
Yet, what's fascinating is that there is one thing in life, that I think too many of us believe and understand "take time". It doesn't happen overnight. It's a process… We've accepted that. We're not looking for quick and immediate results. We don't believe and really aren't prepared for it to happen immediately. And to be fully honest with ourselves, if it does happen then we're almost shocked and thrown off kilter when it does. You know what I'm talking about…right?
C'mon guys… You should know this. It's not in Tanach, that you've never learned. It's probably the most popular Jewish song, that all of us have sung. It's sung slow by kumzitzes. It's fast by weddings. It's dancing on Simchas Torah and it's walking to the gas chambers. It's Yossele Rosenblatt and the London Boys choir. It's every single time we mention the concept. It's Ani Mamin. It's the principle of our faith. It's Mashiach. It's Geula. It's redemption. And it's always right Now.
We don't ask to get healed right away in a second. We don't ask for our parnassa b'mehira. That we should find a job in one second. We don't daven for our shidduch immediately. We don't say that we wait for a child to be born in an instant. We understand, Hashem has his time and plan and we're good with it. We daven that it should happen b'ito and b'zmano. That all the blessings should come and that we want them, but Hashem should do it on His schedule and timing. When it's right and we deserve it and He best sees fit.
Yet, whenever we mention the concept of Mashiach, of Redemption, of building the Bais Ha'Mikdash and even the eradication of all evil. We don't want it on His time. We want it fast. We want it now. We don't want to wait. We don't have patience. We don't want a process. We don't want lines. We don't want wars. Not long-drawn-out ones. Not even short and quick ones. We don't want to take our time. We want them all to go up immediately like smoke. We want them all dead tomorrow. Them isn't just Gaza, Hamas, or Iran. It's everyone that's evil. Like smoke….poof… You know the Nuclear kind, that Iran's not developing…
We don't want to have time to pack, to sell our house. To wait for the wrecking ball to come down and knock out that golden pimple. We don't want committee meetings about how to build the Mikdash. We want the food on the table NOW. On the Mizbayach. We want to be offering sacrifices tomorrow. Or today. We want to leave everything behind in America, immediately. Without delay. Without a garage or estate sale. Without an agent. Without an Aliya specialist. "Meheira Meheira Meheira". We don't want to have time for our matza to rise. For our amazon package we just ordered to come. For the renovations we just made to finally be finished. We just want a shofar. We want it fast. Immediate. We wait and wait and wait for this to happen. We're looking at the door every moment. When will this traffic finally ease up? When can I step on the gas? We're davening non-stop for not just a redemption. We never do that. But an immediate redemption. One that doesn't delay, take time or have any process to it. That's the only thing in our lives that we ever do that for… Right?
OK… am I the only one that feels a little bit awkward here? Because, to be honest, as much as I think we all give lip-service to that concept. And there are certainly times when we feel that way. Particularly when something terrible scary and foreboding like a bad American election takes place. But l'maaseh… I think most of us are fine with a process when it comes to Mashiach, the Bais Ha'Mikdash, picking up and moving to Israel… and even crazy enough for the war to be over. I don't think anyone is really really davening and asking Hashem for a nuclear bomb to fall on everyone in Gaza. Or that a divine fire or plague break out on every Free Palestine idiot in congress, in France, in the UN. Do you really really deeply ask Hashem that they should mamash mamash mamash go up in smoke in one second? That every church should just be destroyed. That every idolatry all of a sudden implode and blow up killing everyone in one second. If you haven't that you really aren't davening out of the siddur that we are meant to be using with any real kavana.
Maybe that's why you close your eyes and don't look inside. It's hard to see the words in front of you asking Hashem to IMMEDIATELY bring you home, build the bais Hamikdash and eradicate evil. It's easier to close your eyes and just think that it should happen in it's proper scheduled time and that it should be soon…but slowly. To focus on the achakeh lo- the waiting for it, more than the b'chol yom she'yavo- that it should happen today. In one day. It should all change now.
Perhaps more than any parsha this week's parsha of Chayei Sara is an impatient one. It's one that's on the move. The main thrust of the parsha is of course the finding of a spouse for Yitzchak. It's the story and then again the repeated story of Eliezer's journey to bring together this Shidduch. Our Rabbis tell us that this parsha more than any other is repeated and shlepped out. All of the details of Eliezer's meeting with Rivkah, the feeding of the camels, his miraculous journey there, the gifts that he gave her. It's all repeated, in real time as it happens and again when he tells the story over to Lavan and Besuel. The reason given, which really isn't much of an explanation, is that
Yafeh sichasun shel avdei avos mi'torasan m'torasan shel banim- the conversation of the servants of our Patriarchs is nicer or better than the Torah of the children.
After all, our sages note, that laws of Shabbos, of slaughtering animals, of purity all of those mitzvos get a verse or two. Yet here we go on for tens of pesukim on a seemingly repetitious nice interesting story.
As I said, this seems to be an observation the sages are making, but it doesn't really explain why. What's perhaps even more revealing and telling about this statement of our sages, is that it seems to be made in middle of the story by one specific aspect of it. Rashi tells us this on the verse that Eliezer reveals that he came to Charan miraculously in one minute. Poof. He was there. The land crunched together and boom he landed there. It was Harry Potter. That's where Rashi tells us that it's a story worth repeating. That there's no process. That it happens instantaneously. That his prayer is answered even before he finishes it. That it's as we say in Hebrew chick chock.
In fact, it's not just that prayer and the land thing that happens instantaneously. The entire story is recited on 2X the speed. Everyone is running. Everyone is in a rush. Look at the verses
Bereishis (24:15) and it was before he finished speaking and Rivka came out…
(24:17) and the servant ran out towards her and he said…
(24:18) and she said drink my master and she hurried and lowered her pitcher and gave him to drink
(24:19) and she finished giving him to drink and said let me draw for your camels before they finish drinking
(24:20) and she hurried and emptied out her pitcher to the trough and she ran again to the well.
(24:22) and as the camel finished to drink the man took the bracelets…
(24:28) and the maiden ran and told her mother's house…
(24:29) And Rivkah had a brother and his name was Lavan and Lavan ran to the man…
See, what I'm talking about. Everyone is in a rush. There's no time. We've gotta move. This is the story. This is what is incredible and worth repeating. This is the most important lesson that we need to learn from conversation of the eved. This is much more important and nicer than all of the Torah of the children. Because this isn't Torah. It's not lomdus. It's not a process that makes any sense. It's just conversation. It's just what pops out of our mouth, and happens. Which doesn't take any time, or even thought. It's how the future and destiny of Klal Yisrael needs to happen and how we need to relate to it.
There's a fascinating medrash that tells us that there were three times and for three people where their prayers were answered as they left their mouths. The first was of course here by Eliezer when he asked Hashem to provide him with a sign for the match for Yitzchak. The second is Moshe, when it came to them being swallowed up by the earth. And the third was by Shlomo Ha'Melech by the building of the Bais Ha'Mikdash that Hashem should send down a fire and eat up all of the sacrifices that they had brought. Each of them was answered immediately, although as the Lubavitcher Rebbe notes, Eliezer was answered the fastest even before he finished. What is the reason behind this and what's all the hurry? And in what merit was it necessary for this immediate response to take place?
The answer perhaps is the reason why we don't really think about an immediate geula and redemption, whereas in every other area we pretty much would like to see and instant response without any hesitation or process. The reason is because in every other area in life, we have a plan. We have a game. We have a schedule. We have things that we want and we need to do and want to happen. It's about us. And that feeling that our schedule and idea and plans are not working out the way that we want them to on our terms is very unsettling. We're out of control. Perhaps it doesn't shtim with what Hashem wants. That throws us off. That make us feel helpless.
It's precisely for that reason as well that we have the opposite reaction when it comes to redemption, to the Bais Ha'Mikdash, to the winning of wars and the eradication of evil. We have a plan and an idea how that should play out as well in our mind. Mashiach should preferably come on a Sunday morning after I daven and eat a bagel and learn with my chavrusa. Preferably bein ha'sedorim. The eradication of evil and Gaza should be a short but nice and quick war. Maybe Trump and Bibi should spend a few days dropping bombs or something. Christianity should obviously fall apart, slowly they should awaken up and see Hashem and become pro-Israel. The United Nations should have a big wake up call, maybe a big terrorist attack. Yes, the Bais Ha'Mikdash should be built, but it's a slow process. We need to get everyone here first. We need to arrange flights. We need to pack up all of our espresso machines and meat smokers. We have to pack up all of our sefarim, our yeshivos, our important kollelim. There's a process. There's a Torah to it. It's not something that happens in one conversation.
Bottom line…it's all about us. And that's the problem and that's what has to be the paradigm shift. It's the one that our sages put in our prayers every time we mention the end of days. It's what they didn't put in for all our other prayers.
See, Geula can and will and has to happen, when it's not about us but it's about Him. It's about the world seeing and realizing Him. Knowing Hashem. Revealing His glory to the world. The world is sick. It's dying. It's in pain. The Shechina has been waiting so long. Hashem's goodness and light is waiting to explode into the world. We have one job here. We were chosen for one thing. To bring the world to that day. To make that revelation happen. Much like Eliezer eved Avraham, has one job. He has to put aside all of his personal dreams, desires, agendas and plans. He's the primary student of Avraham. He has a child on the market. He wants more then anything else for a different plan to work out. But that's not his job. That's not why he's an eved.
Eliezer's only job to bring about the match of Yitzchak and Rivka. To create the first Jewish marriage in Israel born to the first Jewish couple (Avraham and Sarah got married before, they came to Israel). To create the foundation of the Jewish people that will reveal Hashem as the God of the heaven and earth. It's not about him. He has to put that all aside and think about Hashem. It's with that mindset that he prays. It's why he's answered faster than anyone else in the world or history of mankind. Even faster than Moshe and Shlomo, who are close seconds and thirds. That's the sicha- the conversation of the true servant of our Patriarchs that's worth more than the Torah that we think is ours- that's all about us, and that Hashem is placed on the side. It's why from his prayer, it all happens in high speed. Because it's Hashem's timeline. Not ours or his. And if it's about Hashem and His mission and that's all I care about, then it needs to happen as soon as possible. It needs to happen NOW.
The same is true for the prayers of Moshe for the eradication of evil Korach who is challenging the whole premise of Moshe and the Torah and the Kohanim as being the ones that will connect us to the Bais Ha'Mikdash. Evil, that doesn't want our holy Hashem appointed Kohanim to be the ones doing the service. People that think that all religions are fine and should be represented. That Moshe doesn't have a monopoly on spirituality. That the temple mount should be open. That we should be pluralistic. That Palestine should be free for all. That we need to be democratically elected. That needs to end immediately. That needs to be swallowed up in the earth. That isn't a process. But that tefilla, has to come from us. It has to come for Hashem, not for our agenda, our Gimmel party. Or for tax dollars and subsidies or army exemptions. Or even settler rights. It has to do with Hashem's glory being hidden by evil. And thus, it's not subject to any delay. It needs to happen in a second. It's why we always say that it needs to happen b'mehiera- like smoke. Poof. All gone.
And finally we have Shlomo. We have the Temple. We have redemption. It's the only and last prayer we need for the fire to come down. The prayer has to be two words. "Hashem, Now." Not tomorrow. Not when I've packed. Not with all my Torah. Hashem just reveal Yourself now. Send down that fire. I'm ready. I'm all set. I have nothing else on my agenda. I have only You. I'm sick of sitting in traffic. I'm sure you are as well. You've had enough of all of that music, and kumzitz and Yerushalayim songs while You're waiting on hold. You're ready to answer the phone. We need to just press One and the Geula will be here. The question is if we can do that. I'm ready… He's ready… Are you?
Have a peaceful and patient Shabbos,
Rabbi Ephraim Schwartz
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YIDDISH PROVERB OF THE WEEK
“Shlof gicher, men darf di kishn" - Sleep faster, we need the pillows.
RABBI SCHWARTZ'S TOUR GUIDE EXAM QUESTION OF THE WEEK
answer below at end of Email
22. According to Plate tectonics, the Arabian plate is moving in which of the Cardinal Directions? ________
What is a metamorphic rock?
A. A rock that has transformed due to exposure to conditions, such as heat and pressure
B. A rock formed through a slow sedimentation process at the bottom of the sea
C. Any rock that has changed due to water/wind erosion
D. Any rock that forms inside a magma chamber beneath the surface
RABBI SCHWARTZ’S COOL VIDEO OF THE WEEK
https://soundcloud.com/ephraim-schwartz/rivkah – Every year the oilam (and me) wait for this week's Parsha to listen to my amazing chuppa song I composed for my Sister Rivky's chasuna from this week's parsha… Yitz Berry amazing arangements!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P-ij1jOOHMs&list=RDP-ij1jOOHMs&start_radio=1 - in honor of Shabbos Chevron- the one and only original Dedi Chevron in concert…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QC-OUVsJ8Wg&list=RDQC-OUVsJ8Wg&start_radio=1 – This is weird… Ishay Ribo Yitzchak Rivka… with puppets and Spanish subtitles… hmmm
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G1wzuNozYPg&list=RDG1wzuNozYPg&start_radio=1 – The Rebbe's Rosh Chodesh Kiselv song…Eli Marcus…
https://soundcloud.com/ephraim-schwartz/eishet-chayil –And in honor of sarah Immeinu and her life the hesped Avraham Avinu gave… my Eishes Chayil composition…
RABBI SCHWARTZ'S ERA’S AND THEIR PLACES AND PEOPLE IN ISRAEL OF THE WEEK
A New Era begins- 3427 from Creation-333 BC – With the settling of the Jews in Israel and the restoration of the Bais Ha'Mikdash and its service the second commonwealth begins. It is also the commencement of the Era of the Prophets from Klal Yisrael. Ezra, Chaggai, Malachi are the last ones that will be prophets. Our sages tell us only fools and children still have that power. And maybe Rabbis from Karmiel that are tour guides, although some may suggest he fits into the first categories…
The era of prophecy ends at the same time that yetzer hara, that plagued the first temple period and all of our history is also removed by the sages from us. They slaughtered the yetzer hara of idolatry. No longer will Jews be drawn to that false sense of spirituality that idolatry so overpoweringly captured our nation. Sure, Jews would serve Greek gods, and Roman pagan worship and will fall into the Buddha baloney and other idiocy today… but that's not l'sheim shamayim or for spirituality purposes. That's only about being cool. About being able to permit intermarriage and hang with their promiscuous women. It's not the same.
Now as that draw and inclination towards negative spirituality is removed, the counter-balance to that which was prophets and prophecy had to end as well. There needs to be free choice. There's gotta be equal challenges to each side. And thus it ended. With that however a new era begins. One that is of Torah. One that is of sages. Of non-prophets, but spiritual leaders. And thus the 120 members of Israel's Men of the Great Assembly was established. Welcome to the first Knesset… Wow how far we have fallen…
The Anshei Ha'Knesset Gedola began their era declaring the end of prophecy. The selected and sealed the books of the Prophets. There were lots to choose from that were not selected. Books that Shmuel wrote, that Yirmiyahu and Yeshaya did. Even King David and Shlomo… Yet they were not included. They were called Sifrei Chitzonim. They didn't have eternal messages for the nation. 24 altogether were selected and sealed. It didn't happen without debate, as most Jewish things do. Yet, that was the conclusion. These became the books of Tanach. They were meant to be learned always. They're meant to speak to us today. Are we learning them…?
From that period on we will have the Oral tradition's development. The written word was done. The oral tradition is what became the primary focus of the Rabbis since then. It was not going to be written down. It will be almost a half a millennia until after the second Temple when that happens. But phase one ends with this era. A new era has begun. The 2000 era of Torah which started on Sinai 1500 years before is ready for it's last quarter to begin…And what better way than the establishment of the Rabbis that would set the tone for all generations.
How did they proceed. Next we cover some of their decrees and changes in Klal Yisrael that set the tone until today…
RABBI SCHWARTZ'S TERRIBLE IMPATIENT JOKES OF THE WEEK
A woman asks a man: "Do you want to be the Father of my children?"
Man: "Yes, I would love to!"
Woman: "They are impatiently waiting you at home"
I took our three-year-old to Shul for the first time. Getting impatient while waiting for davening to start, he turned t and asked, "What time does Hashem get here?"
Why are people in wheelchairs impatient? They can't stand waiting.
Why are impatient doctors always broke? Because they never have any patients.
What did the impatient barber say to his customer? I think we need to cut this short
What do you call an impatient skin infection? Rash
At a restaurant, I was getting impatient waiting on my food.I caught the waiter's attention as he rushed by. “How long will my spaghetti be?”
The waiter said: “I don’t know. We never measure it.”
What did the impatient vegetarian say to the waiter? Get me a soup! And make it snap pea!
What did the contractor say to the impatient customer? We are doing asbestos we can”
Some people call me impatient. I haven't got time for those people.
So there was a huge line of animals, waiting for a store to open. They were all waiting patiently, until the rabbit came. This rabbit was very impatient and wanted to join the store first. So he tried sneaking under everyone. Although that didn't work because the lion, found him and furiously said "HEY! No cheating!" and punched the rabbit so hard that he flew 2 miles away.
But the rabbit didn't give up and tried again. Although this time the elephant found him and said "Do you think we are idiots, waiting in line?" and kicked him so hard, that he flew 4 miles away.
So the rabbit very angrily said "OK then, I ain't opening the store".
Two men are playing golf, and there are two ladies playing in front of them. The ladies are taking forever...really playing slow. The men are getting impatient.
After about three holes of this, one guy says, “This is ridiculous”. “Get in the cart and go tell them to let us play through!”
So the other guy takes off in the cart. About halfway to the next hole, he stops, turns the cart around and comes back.
“Hey”, he says. “This is embarrassing but that’s my wife and my girlfriend playing together. “I can’t get near them. You go.”
So the other guy jumps in the cart and heads off. A minute later he comes back. He doesn’t say anything...just walks over to the tee box.
The first guy says, “Well? Did you talk to them?”
And the second guy says, “Uh...small world!”
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The answer to this week”s question is A – Ok, it seems that I can't get off of this 50/50 streak here. I wasn't sure about either of these answers. But I actually was more confident about Part A then I was Part B. Turns out it was the opposite. I thought the Syrian African Rift from Arabia would be heading towards Israel which would make it West. It turns out that it's North, which is true as well. Although I would say it's North West. But oh well. On the other hand I wasn't sure about Part B. but I actually got it right. As a metamorphis is when its transformed with heat and stuff. So half right and half wrong makes the new score Rabbi Schwartz having 15 points and the MOT having 20 points on this latest Ministry of Tourism exam.
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