Insights and Inspiration
from the
Holy Land
from
Rabbi Ephraim Schwartz
"Your friend in Karmiel"
July 9th 2020 -Volume 10
Issue 37 18th Tamuz 5780
Parshat Pinchas
Mr. Right
We have funny magnets on our refrigerator door. I should know. I've
been spending a lot of time reading them …every hour or so. For like 4 months.
Even Pesach when I knew there was only potato flavored stuff inside. I really
need some tours people. It's funny to see the evolution of our magnets. I think
I should write a thesis on it one day. For example take this one
"Thank God for dirty
dishes, they have a tale to tell, while other families go hungry this one is
eating very well…." That was a
very grateful for what we have towards the beginning of our marriage when we
our kids were little and we didn't have time to do the dishes
The one that follows that is quite simply "We don't skinny
dip- we chunky dunk". Yup, we no longer were the same people from our
wedding picture. Well at least I'm not. My wife hasn't aged a day. In fact,
sometimes I get confused and think I'm looking at my wedding picture. (whewww
glad I double checked this one to edit)
The next one though is a little more graphic though. "Fridge
pickers wear big knickers". We are evolving….
And most recent addition is "One day my fridge will have
revenge on you. It will go to your room, open your door, stare at you for three
minutes and then it will leave."
And then there is that dusty old one that has been buried under all
the bar mitzva and wedding picture magnets. (Those are the worst by the way.
Why do I want a picture of what I looked like by Eli's Bar Mitzvah? Who is Eli
anyways?) I believe my wife bought it for me just a few birthdays after we
had gotten married. It says
“When we got married I
knew I was marrying Mr. Right … I just didn’t know his first name was Always."
Ahhh… the wisdom of magnets. They always
know how to hit the nail on the head. They are the words of the prophets that
are written on our refrigerator doors. And it only took her six years to learn
the truth of the statement. O.K. Schwartz, stop dreaming, it was meant
facetiously. The truth is the years of marriage have taught me that more often
than not, it is she who usually has the more correct intuition about
things and is more frequently right than I am (thank God she doesn’t read my
e-mails-I'll just leave this little line out when I read it at the Shabbos
table shhhh…)
This is not to say that I have fully incorporated this
reality into my approach in life. I don’t believe I would have received
aforementioned magnet if I had. Yet, one of the great challenges in life, for
Rabbis in particular, but in truth for anyone who feels strongly about a
particular topic is to learn how and when to properly achieve and express the
truth. My role model in achieving this goal has been of course none less an
individual who was rarely wrong; our greatest leader Moshe.
This week's Torah portion shares with us an incredible incident and
lesson of what truly made Moshe one of the greatest individuals of all time. As
the Torah relates, Moshe, commanded by Hashem, tells the Jewish nation as they
approach the land of Israel the laws of its inheritance. The Land was meant to
be divided up each tribe by a divine lottery larger tribes would receive
larger portions and smaller tribes smaller portions. In order to maintain
the balance between the tribes each tribe would pass down the Land to their
sons so as to maintain the portion remaining in the family possession and not
go to another tribe. Quite logical, yet as in all good plans a few good women
manage to find a hole.
“And the Daughters of
Tzelafchad son of Hefor… drew near and stood before Moshe, before Elazar the
Kohen (Aharon’s son) .. and the entire assembly …saying. ‘Our father died in
the wilderness but was not among the assembly that gathered against Hashem in
the assembly of Korach, but died of his own sin; and had no sons. Why should
the name of our father be omitted from among his family because he had no sons?
Give us a portion among our fathers brothers.’
And Moshe brought their claim before Hashem.”
The Chafetz Chaim one of the most impactful leaders and authors in
prewar Europe notes the incredible behavior of Moshe. Was he not the individual
who had studied the entire Torah in heaven from Hashem? Did not Hashem reveal
the answer to him on Sinai together with the entire Torah 40 years previously?
Couldn’t he have extrapolated the answer which God gave (which was that they
may inherit, yet should marry within their own tribe) on his own? Why is Moshe
the ultimate “answer man” for all questions rendered answerless over this
seemingly basic law?
His answer is I believe an inspiring perspective for all those in a
position where your opinion is asked for. Moshe could have answered (as most of
us might have been able to do) yet he was fearful that he had already been
biased. Once the Daughters of Tzelafchad said that their father was not on
Moshe’s antagonist, Korach’s, side he recognized that he would no longer be
able to give a truly objective response. He had been biased in their favor and
therefore recused himself from the decision. How remarkable! This greatest of
all men was able to recognize that even the slightest personal factors has the
power to influence his decisions and render his judgment impartial. And what
was it already? It wasn’t that he gave him a bribe or even sent him
flowers it was merely that their father was from the 3 million other Jews that
didn’t rebel (only 250 did). Yet that was what made Moshe our leader. The
ability to recognize that to render an opinion of truth even the slightest hint
of influence can render one impartial.
We live in a world where we are inundated with opinions. Radio,
Newspapers, politics religion, relationships, and advertisements, all scream
out to us with claims of possessing the truth. Fortunately, there are enough
contradictions in all of them to allow us to see that none of them are as true
as they claim to be. I don't think that there were times that were lived in
that ws so obvious of how many expert opinions have been proven to be wrong
again and again and again than in the current pandemic. Although I have yet to
hear one of them admit it. Not even just a little bit…Yet we as well have
become influenced that we must develop opinions and then of course give
direction and share out wisdom with others as to what we perceive as being the
right and proper way to approach things. And that's what we do again again and
again. Some of us even write E-Mails each week about them, others comment,
blog, or like and don't like. But we need to say something. The virtue of
silence and humility is long gone.
Don't get me wrong. I don't feel it is wrong to have opinions and I
believe that one should have strongly held opinions (even ask my wife). Yet all
of those opinions must be held up to a Moshe- level scrutiny of whether they
are entirely honest or is there the subjective personal “bribe” that may play a
role in that which I present as being the right way. If Moshe could step down
and ask himself that question, it behooves us to ask ourselves the same. We have
entered the period of the three week's of mourning for our Temple. Israel was
under siege. We were sinning, we were destroying ourselves. We had removed Hashem
from our people. Trust me, everyone back then had an opinion they were sharing
about whose fault it was. Who was to blame. What we should be doing different.
Why this wasn't really a threat or why it is imminent destruction. There was no
humility. Until… we were all on the ground mourning. Maybe as we mourn now once
again we should all take a step back and stop already "knowing it
all". Maybe than can we truly
become “Mr. Right”.
Have a Shabbos that is ALL right,
Rabbi Ephraim
Schwartz
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RABBI SCHWARTZ’S FAVORITE YIDDISH PROVERB OF THE WEEK
" Az
men chazert tsu fil iber vi gerecht men iz, vert men umgerecht.."- If you repeat often enough that you’re right, you will
discover you’re wrong.
RABBI SCHWARTZ'S TOUR GUIDE EXAM QUESTION OF THE WEEK
answer below at end of Email
35) 19th
century explorer of the Land of Israel:
A.
Richard Kauffmann
B.
Conrad Schick
C.
Erich Mendelsohn
D.
Yigael Yadin
RABBI SCHWARTZ’S COOL VIDEO OF THE WEEK
https://youtu.be/GeLegZpWaqU – Today's
the Day- Ari Goldwag Acapella version
https://youtu.be/Ba7aufdSZSo?list=PLus2WfhoUaTpT189UI7KiyoqzyQ9CaXQ9 – Beautiful Acapella Shabbat medley by
the "Yidden"
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eL4hxGVwcwU – Simcha Leiner Ani Maamin through
generations
RABBI SCHWARTZ'S PARSHA/MITZVA CONNECTION OF THE WEEK
Parshat Pinchas – Mitzva of Inheritance–It is the last of the positive
commandments in the Torah of the Rambam number 248. Yet fascinatingly enough,
the mitzva of inheritance as it is mentioned in the Torah is not that the sons
should inherit, rather the mitzva is that if a person dies without any sons
then his daughter would be the one to inherit him. The assumption thsu being
that if a man does have a son then his son inherits and not the daughter. The
question though would be why doesn't the Torah write that explicitly. Even more
fascinating is that it seems that this entire mitzva really only enters the
Torah as a result of the request for clarity from the daughters of Tzlafchad
who wanted to know what their status would be as their father died and didn't
leave any sons to inherit. Moshe after conferring with Hashem comes back with
the response that 'Mazel Tov" they get to inherit their fathers portion.
The idea behind
this is perhaps that the entire concept of the Torah principles of inheritance
are not one that at face value one would understand. Why is it that only sons
inherit and not the girls? It's not even mentioned in the Torah in that
context. The idea of inheritance is one that is not about getting my parents
money, rather it is about placing the money or property of the parents in the
place where Hashem wants it to be put. The daughters of Tzlfachad rather than
protest, riot, loot or sneak sefer Torahs into the ladies section because of
what some might see as their perceived inequity, approached Moshe for
clarification. Doesn't the role to fulfill our father's legacy fall upon us
when there are no sons to carry on his name and mission. The Midrash in fact
tells us that they came to Moshe after he finished teaching the laws of the
levirate marriage, where the woman is forbidden to marry someone else when her
husband dies without children. She must marry her husband's brother to produce
heirs that would carry on his name. Thus they understood that the inheritance
of the land of their father should also fall under their responsibility. An
inheritance isn't a windfall… It's a responsibility and obligation to utilize
the land and assets the father is no unable to continue to use to further his
presence and Hashem's presence that he revealed in this world.
When a man has
sons it is his upon his sons that obligation falls. Part of that obligation is
of course to take care of their mother, or even their stepmother as well as all
of the father's daughters. It is they that have to provide for them and they
have to marry of the daughters respectably- which in Israel means getting your
future son-in-law an apartment… or so I'm told, I'll let you know if it
happens…I'm not keeping my fingers crossed… As well there is a law that the
first-born gets a double portion. Seemingly as well that would be because he
has the double obligation to see that everything gets done. The Torah even
prohibits one from not inheriting this way. It is on this note that the Rambam
ends his list of positive mitzvos perhaps most appropriately. For at the end of
the list of the mitzvos is assuring that even after one's death the mitzvos
will still be continued to be fulfilled in his merit with the assets he has
left over.
Throughout
generations there have been rotten apples that didn't help out the daughters or
sisters and our sages instituted precautions against that wherein the courts
can enforce that the sons take care of their responsibilities. As well the only
prohibition to subvert the Torah laws of inheritance is after death. While a
father is alive he may set up trusts for his daughters and wife so that they
are provided for external of the inheritance. In fact, there was a common
custom that when a girl would get married her husband would be gifted with a
dowry promising him and equal portion to the sons. As this was done while the
father and structured as debt of the father rather than inheritance it was no
problem. The State of Israel which works under the common secular law where
daughters inherit equal to the sons had Rabbis that sought to establish this
halachic loophole into the system. It didn't fly. But yet many of those wishing
to do things properly certainly are in touch with their Rabbis when writing
their wills. If one has a family that believes in Torah values them knowing
that your last wishes were to follow the path of the Torah is certainly the
greatest last lesson you can give them.
RABBI SCHWARTZ'S ERA’S AND THEIR PLACES AND PEOPLE IN
ISRAEL OF THE WEEK
Shaul's 2nd War
Part I-878 BC
– It's hard to believe that the entire reign was just a mere
two years. So much happened for good and bad. He accomplished a tremendous
amount but somehow he always seemed to fall short. Yet the lessons of this
first king of Israel really set the table for what will seem his Bizzaro world
opposite Dovid Hamelech who will follow him.
After
his first huge victory against Nachash the Ammoni by Yavesh Gilead, it
was time to take care finally of the inner terrorists hounding us our old
friends the Philistines. The navi tell us that Shaul took 2000 men with him in Michmash
and the hills of Beit El while Yonasan, Shaul's son was in Givat Binyamin.
All of those places have kept their biblical names. Michmash in the
tribe of Binyamin is right outside of Geva Binyamin today- which is
unofficially called Adam today. (Interesting side story is that everyone
calls it Adam after the most senior Israeli general ever to get killed in
battle Kuty Adam who was killed in the first Lebanon War. However, it was never
officially called Adam because the biblical city of Adam is not near here at
all). Michmash is a few kilometers from there in the Arab village called
Mach'Mas on a hill called Tel Miriam just west of the modern
yishuv of maalei Michmash Biblical Beit El just North of there is in the arab village of
Bitin south of the modern city of Beit El. This is a serious West
Bank tour and great stories to share when in the area.
So
it starts when Yonasan kills the head of Philistine terrorist clan in Geva
(Adam). This is not a stealth campaign that we are not admitting to. Quite the
opposite it's time the boys learned there's a new sherriff in town and Shaul
blows the shofar and lets everyone. Blowing the shofar was like tweeting back
then. Well the Plishtim weren't going to take that sitting down. They come with
30,000 chariots (the ancient equivelant of tanks), 6000 riders and an army that
was 'like the sand of the sea'. They were coming full throttle and the camped
in Beit Aven which as well has been identified
where the arab village called Burka is located just west of Michmash.
This is a very hilly region of hills and valleys. Many of the Jews hid in those
caves in the area some fled across the Jordan River to the area of Menashe.
Things were heating up.
Shmuel
had told Shaul that when he goes to battle he should await Shmuel's
instructions in Gilgal where the Mishkan was. Shmuel would arrive bring
sacrifices and then give the orders. Yet the 7th day had come and
there was no sign of Shmuel. People started to get nervous and being to desert.
It was not going well. This should have been the moment where Shaul marshalled
the people to have faith. To introduce them to the concept of Jewish time which
is never at the crack of dawn. We're always going to come the last minute. But
he didn't. He brought the offerings himself and as he finished, lo and behold,
Shmuel arrives and he's not a happy camper. Shaul makes excuses, that he was
scared the Plishtim would attack him as they had not brought any offerings and
thus he brought them himself, but Shmuel wasn't buying. He gives Shaul the psak
that he will have a short kingdom and he will not rule long. Hashem is already
preparing his replacement. Shmuel then counts the people and it turns out most
had deserted. There remained just 600 from the original. To make matters worse
the Jews didn't have any weapons. The Plishtim had killed all of the
blacksmiths. All they had were farm tools to fight with. The scene is
reminiscent of the Yom Kippur War where Israel as well did not have much to
fight with since after the 6 Day War everyone, including the US of A refused to
sell us even a bullet. We had to make do with whateve leftovers we had from the
6 Day War that were in pretty bad shape to defend ourselves. The Plishtim
gathered by Michmash to fight in three different groups the West Bank was
flooded with them. Things were not looking good.
Stay
tuned next week for how it all turns out.
RABBI SCHWARTZ’S BEING RIGHT or WRONG JOKES OF THE WEEK
You know the
old story of the couple who comes to the rabbi for marriage counselling. First
the husband tells the rabbi all his complaints about his wife and the rabbi
listens attentively and then pronounces “You’re right.”
Then the wife
pours out her tale of woe about her husband and, again, the rabbi listens very
sympathetically and then says, “You’re right.”
Whereupon
the Rebbetzin rushes into the room screaming, “How can
they both be right?!’
And the rabbi
smiles and says, “You’re right too!”
And you know
what I say? The rabbi was right too!
Yankel was a rich man who was near death. He was very grieved
because he had worked very hard for his money and wanted to be able to take it
with him to heaven. So Yankel begins to pray.
An angel hears his plea and says to him, "I'm sorry, but you can't take your wealth with you."
Yankel implores the angel to speak to God to see if he might bend the rules. He said he would try. In the meantime, Yankel continues to pray.
When the angel reappears, he informs Yankel that God has decided to allow him to take one suitcase with him. Overjoyed, Yankel gathers his largest suitcase and fills it with pure gold bars and places it beside his bed. Soon afterward he dies and shows up at the Gates of Heaven.
The angel Gabriel, seeing the suitcase, says, "Hold on, you can't bring that in here."
Yankel explains that he has permission and suggests he verify his story with God.
Gabriel checks and says, "You're right. You're allowed one carry-on bag, but I'm supposed to check its contents before letting it through."
So Gabriel opens the suitcase to inspect the worldly goods that Yankel found too precious to leave behind and exclaims, "You brought pavement?"
An angel hears his plea and says to him, "I'm sorry, but you can't take your wealth with you."
Yankel implores the angel to speak to God to see if he might bend the rules. He said he would try. In the meantime, Yankel continues to pray.
When the angel reappears, he informs Yankel that God has decided to allow him to take one suitcase with him. Overjoyed, Yankel gathers his largest suitcase and fills it with pure gold bars and places it beside his bed. Soon afterward he dies and shows up at the Gates of Heaven.
The angel Gabriel, seeing the suitcase, says, "Hold on, you can't bring that in here."
Yankel explains that he has permission and suggests he verify his story with God.
Gabriel checks and says, "You're right. You're allowed one carry-on bag, but I'm supposed to check its contents before letting it through."
So Gabriel opens the suitcase to inspect the worldly goods that Yankel found too precious to leave behind and exclaims, "You brought pavement?"
Harry makes an emergency appointment to see his
doctor.
“Doctor,” says Harry, “just look at the mess I’m in. When I awoke this morning, I looked in the mirror and was shocked to see my hair all wiry, my skin wrinkled and blotchy, my eyes bloodshot and bulging out of their sockets and my face so white that I looked like a corpse. What on earth is wrong with me, doctor?”
The doctor looks at Harry and calmly says, “Well, for a start, there’s certainly nothing wrong with your eyesight…”
“Doctor,” says Harry, “just look at the mess I’m in. When I awoke this morning, I looked in the mirror and was shocked to see my hair all wiry, my skin wrinkled and blotchy, my eyes bloodshot and bulging out of their sockets and my face so white that I looked like a corpse. What on earth is wrong with me, doctor?”
The doctor looks at Harry and calmly says, “Well, for a start, there’s certainly nothing wrong with your eyesight…”
A man told his doctor that he wasn't able to do all the
things around the house that he used to do.
When the examination was complete, he said, "Now, Doc, I can take it. Tell me in plain English what is wrong with me."
"Well, in plain English," the doctor replied, "you're just lazy."
"Okay," said the man. "Now give me the medical term so I can tell my wife." '
When the examination was complete, he said, "Now, Doc, I can take it. Tell me in plain English what is wrong with me."
"Well, in plain English," the doctor replied, "you're just lazy."
"Okay," said the man. "Now give me the medical term so I can tell my wife." '
David, a senior citizen, was driving down the I87, when
his mobile phone rang. Answering, he heard his wife's voice urgently warning
him, "David, I just heard on the news that there's a car going the wrong
way down the I87. So please be careful!"
"Yes I know," said David, "But it's not just one...there are dozens of them!"
"Yes I know," said David, "But it's not just one...there are dozens of them!"
When Rivkah was called up for jury
service, she asked the judge whether she could be excused.
"I don’t believe in capital punishment," she said, "and I wouldn’t want my views to prevent the trial from running its proper course".
The judge liked her thoughtfulness but had to tell her that she was perfectly suitable to serve on the jury.
"Madam," he explained, "This is not a murder trial, it's just a simple civil lawsuit. Mrs F is bringing this case against her husband because he gambled away the entire $15,000 he had promised her for her birthday so that she could carry out a make-over on her kitchen."
"OK," said Rivkah, "I'll join your jury - I could be wrong about capital punishment after all."
"I don’t believe in capital punishment," she said, "and I wouldn’t want my views to prevent the trial from running its proper course".
The judge liked her thoughtfulness but had to tell her that she was perfectly suitable to serve on the jury.
"Madam," he explained, "This is not a murder trial, it's just a simple civil lawsuit. Mrs F is bringing this case against her husband because he gambled away the entire $15,000 he had promised her for her birthday so that she could carry out a make-over on her kitchen."
"OK," said Rivkah, "I'll join your jury - I could be wrong about capital punishment after all."
Lionel is walking home one Friday afternoon feeling quite
downcast because he is starting a new job on Monday and desperately needs a new
suit. But he can’t afford to buy one. Just then he passes the Hendon Menswear
Shop and sees a large sign in the window: -
"What d'ya think, my name is Fink and I sell clothes for nothink."
Lionel goes into the shop and chooses a new suit. He is very pleased with it – it’s just right for his new job. He is about to leave the shop, looking good and feeling lucky, when his joy is cut short. Fink stops him and demands payment for the suit.
Lionel says, "But your sign in the window says, ‘What d’ya think, my name is Fink and I sell clothes for nothink.’ So how come you want payment?"
"You are reading my sign wrong," replies Fink. "It actually says, ‘What d'ya think? - My name is Fink? - And I sell clothes for nothink?’"
"What d'ya think, my name is Fink and I sell clothes for nothink."
Lionel goes into the shop and chooses a new suit. He is very pleased with it – it’s just right for his new job. He is about to leave the shop, looking good and feeling lucky, when his joy is cut short. Fink stops him and demands payment for the suit.
Lionel says, "But your sign in the window says, ‘What d’ya think, my name is Fink and I sell clothes for nothink.’ So how come you want payment?"
"You are reading my sign wrong," replies Fink. "It actually says, ‘What d'ya think? - My name is Fink? - And I sell clothes for nothink?’"
A police officer stops Yankel for speeding & reckless
driving and asks him very nicely if he could see his license. Yankel replied in
a huff, "I vish you guys could get your act togeder. Just yesterday you
take avay my license and now today you expect me to show it to you...
Bernard, an elderly Jew, is bumped by a car while
crossing the street. He is seemingly unhurt, but Sarah, his wife,
persuades him to go to the doctor, just in case.
Bernard returns home, and Sarah says –
"Nu, vos zogt der doktor?" ["So? What did the doctor say?"]
"Der doktor zogt az ich hob a flucky." ["The doctor says I have a flucky."]
"Oy, gevalt! A flucky! Terrible! What do you do for a flucky?"
"I don't know -- he didn't say, and I forgot to ask."
Well, by this time Sarah is in a state of high anxiety. She tells her neighbours "My Bernard was hit by a car, and now he has a flucky! I don't know what to do!"
Neighbour #1 says, "In the old country, when someone had a flucky, we always applied cold. Cold is the best thing for a flucky."
Neighbour #2 says, "What are you talking about? Cold is absolutely the worst thing you could do for a flucky! We always applied heat, that's the only thing to do for a flucky."
Cold, heat! Oy! Now thoroughly agitated, Sarah decides to call the doctor herself. "Doctor, please tell me, what's wrong with my husband?"
"I told him... nothing's wrong. He got off lucky."
Bernard returns home, and Sarah says –
"Nu, vos zogt der doktor?" ["So? What did the doctor say?"]
"Der doktor zogt az ich hob a flucky." ["The doctor says I have a flucky."]
"Oy, gevalt! A flucky! Terrible! What do you do for a flucky?"
"I don't know -- he didn't say, and I forgot to ask."
Well, by this time Sarah is in a state of high anxiety. She tells her neighbours "My Bernard was hit by a car, and now he has a flucky! I don't know what to do!"
Neighbour #1 says, "In the old country, when someone had a flucky, we always applied cold. Cold is the best thing for a flucky."
Neighbour #2 says, "What are you talking about? Cold is absolutely the worst thing you could do for a flucky! We always applied heat, that's the only thing to do for a flucky."
Cold, heat! Oy! Now thoroughly agitated, Sarah decides to call the doctor herself. "Doctor, please tell me, what's wrong with my husband?"
"I told him... nothing's wrong. He got off lucky."
**********************************
Answer is B– Got it right. This wasn't easy
but a good educated guess and I was good to go. The answer was obviously not
Yadin, who wasn't even born in the 19th century (which is the 1800's
in case you didn't know- it took me a while until I got that straight). That
left the other three. Kaufmann and Mendelsohn sounded like architechts that
deisigned buildings in Israel which was I guessed after the British mandate.
Shick, though a German missionary though who's name is all over Jerusalem and
was the guy that designed Meah Shearim and the Ir Dovid Siloam inscription in
the Chizkiyahs tunnel was certainly before the 1900's. It had to be him… and it
was. making the score Schwartz 25 and 10 for MOT (Ministry of Tourism) on
this exam. Let's see if I can get my groove back.
