Holy Letters- Parshat Emor 2024 5784

 

Insights and Inspiration

from the

Holy Land

from

Rabbi Ephraim Schwartz

"Your friend in Karmiel"

 May 17^th 2024 -Volume 13 Issue 31 9^th of Iyar 5784

Parshat Emor 

Letters

 

Nobody writes letters anymore. Is the post office even still in business? Oh yeah… I forgot someone has to deliver, and more importantly return, all of those Amazon packages my wife orders. But who writes letters these days? Who even types messages that are longer than a few sentences and  that don’t have emjois in them? I don’t mean the fundraising ones, or the legal ones, or even the Holiday greetings or invitations, I mean the good old fashioned

 “Hi Mom, how are you doing?”

“Camp is great”

“I love yeshiva”

“I made lots of friends”

“Send money…”

“Love, Ephraim”

Yeah, my mother still has plenty of those meaningful letters tucked away in a box in the attic, that all pretty much end the same way. I have a box in my office, as well, with some of those letters that she sent me. All of them with words of Mussar and important reminders that I would’ve probably forgotten without them, like to stay out of trouble, study hard and brush my teeth at night before I went to bed. You know all of those things that the average 20-year-old might forget without his mother’s reminders.

That box also has letters that I received from friends of mine, some from when I was in camp, some from when I was learning in yeshiva in Israel. I even have a few that some off my Rabbis took the time to write me and my siblings too. Although, on those as I could just picture my mother standing on top of my sisters’ heads telling them that they better write a few words to their brother in Israel, if they know what’s good for them, or want dinner tonight. Yeah, my father’s head too..

 There’s something special about the written word. Something precious about seeing that ink on yellowed paper and the scrawl upon it that is not just words, but the time and thought that and heart and soul that someone special and close to me took to dedicate to tell me that they’re thinking about me. It’s something that typed words on a screen, or an E-Mail could never convey. I don’t care how many heart emojis you put in it; they don’t come close to seeing in someone’s handwriting the word “love” written out…

 We’ve lost that. It’s sad. One can even suggest that it’s symbolic or reflective of the impersonal social media social media relationship world that we are living in. People today have “friends”, have “likes”, have “followers” but they don’t have that closeness, that heart and that neshoma that my pre-techno generation had. We’re “connected more than ever before, but those connections area as deep as the screen they’re printing on and the delete box or “folder” that you will never open again.

 Yet in Israel today there is one area where that neshoma of writing can still be found. Tragically and movingly a custom has developed of letter writing by young soldiers before they are going into battle. In ancient times the Talmud tells us that the soldiers that went out to battle in the times of King David would all write a “Get” (Jewish divorce documents) to their wives. This was so that in case they were killed or captured or disappeared in battle and were unidentified their wives would be able to remarry and not remained “chained” to a marriage and spouse whose fate may never be resolved. Today’s soldiers don’t write letters to divorce, but rather to remain connected eternally to their families and loved ones. To share with them their ideals, their values, their love and deepest thoughts, because they are going to a place from where they may never return and have the opportunity to ever tell them how much they mean to them. What the really important things to them are.

 I’ve read these letters, many which families have released to the press or the public. Some which the families I have met shared with me, some even blood soaked or covered with ash and burn marks taken from their child-soldiers’ bodies, as they carried them close to their hearts in the battlefields. The letters rip the heart open. They’re filled with light. They’re filled with love. There is wisdom, depth and inspiration, that one reading them would ever think, is far beyond the young 19, 20, years these young boys have been on the earth could ever intuit. There are letters from older married miluimnik reserve soldiers to their families’, their children, their parents, their spouses.

  There are the letters from the so many expecting fathers that understood as they put on their uniforms and took their guns and got in the jeeps leaving at the doorway their pregnant newly married wife, that may have been their childhood sweetheart, that they may never hold that young son that is in their mother’s belly. The young son, who will never say the word “Abba”.

 The letters explain to this child that Abba loves him. That Abba is sad that he is not at your bris, your bar mitzva, to walk him down the Chuppa. Not there in the flesh, but always there in spirit. Yes, Abba is sad that he was taken so early and won’t be there. But he didn’t have a choice. He went to make the world a better and safer place. He went to destroy darkness. He was killed, because the nation needed him. The land had to be redeemed. The honor of Hashem and the Jewish people needed to avenged. We are born and placed here in this world to bring that light to the world. To reveal the truth of our existence. To make the world a place to where the Shechina could reside. A world of joy and happiness and eternal peace. One, where you, my son, could grow up and bask in its glory. That’s why Abba is not here. I’m not here, so you could live and flourish in a better world than the one that we are in now.

 There is only one army in the world where letters like this are being written. There is only one country where such bright light is shining forth from its blood-soaked earth. It has always been hard to imagine that scene our Talmud tells us about the martyrdom of Rebbi Chanina Ben Tradyon in the times of the Mishna, who was wrapped in Torah scrolls and set aflame by the Romans in public display. Our sages tell us that as those scrolls burnt the letters flew off to the heavens. They were eternal. Yet, in reading these holy letters written today by our so many heroic martyrs one understands that our sages our telling us that the holy words written for generations are much more than ink on paper. They are eternal. They have a neshoma. They dance and cry and float above our nation forever. The bodies may be destroyed, but their words last forever.

This week in our Torah reading of Parshat Emor we come to a turning point in the Torah. The Book of Vayikra which is the middle book of the Torah divides between the first two books which discuss the development of our nation and the last two books which are our journey from Sinai to the land of Israel. The other four books are the body of the Jewish people. Vayikra is the heart and it’s neshoma.

  That heart, much like a physical heart, is itself divided into parts. The first part of the book contains the sacrifices and the laws and process of a maintaining and achieving purity. The ways that we become close to Hashem, to our core and the things to avoid and how to overcome the blockage of Tumah that will clog our spiritual arteries. The rest of the book, from here on in, discusses how we can take that holy spirit and bring it out to the world and realize it. It’s the holidays, the land of Israel, and the blessings and the curses that lay in our hands and the actions that we take to bring that light to the rest of the world.

Parshat Emor is the center of it all. It starts with a description of the laws of the Kohanim who are the divine “veins” that transmit that kedusha- that holy spiritual energy to us and from us to Hashem. The pure state they must always be in, the complete unblemished nature that not only they must have to carry our supplications, but of the life force and blood of the offerings we bring. The Parsha concludes with the connection to Hashem, that all start to be made when all the required prerequisite conditions are met. When we are spiritually healthy. When the lights go on and are plugged in. The world then becomes a place where we have Mo’eid- we have meetings with Hashem. We visit Him. We are mikra’ei kodesh- we can call and establish holiness to the world.

 The centerpiece of all this, of the entire Torah, of our Exodus from Egypt and the turning point transition is really one essential mitzva. The Mitzva that encapsulates everything. The Mitzva of Kiddush Hashem, perhaps one of the most fascinating in all the Torah. The verse tells us.

 You shall faithfully observe My commandments: I am Hashem.

V’Lo ti’chalilu es sheim kodshi- You shall not profane My holy name,

Vi’nikdashti b’toch Bnai Yisrael -that I may be sanctified in the midst of the Israelite people—

Ani Hashem mi’kadishchem- I am Hashem Who sanctifies you.

I who brought you out of the land of Egypt to be your God, I am Hashem. (Vayikra: 22:21-23)

 Three times it says “I am Hashem” in case you didn’t notice. We need to observe the mitzvos. We can’t make a Chilul Hashem. And in case you didn’t know… I’m the God that took you out of Egypt…

 It’s a strange mitzva, I noted this year. Because it would seem that the Torah is telling us that Hashem is the One that will fulfill this Mitzva.” I am Hashem Who sanctifies you” He will be sanctified amongst us. We need merely to not be mechalel His Name and then boom- He is sanctified. There are no other mitzvos that I know of that Hashem tells us that He does them for us. It doesn’t say He is the one that will shake the Lulav for us, it doesn’t say He will bring sacrifices for us or learn Torah or honor or our parents. Yet He is the One that sanctifies us.

 Now Rashi  explains this central mitzva and it’s Egypt connection in that the Torah is telling us this to understand

Al menas kein – on this condition.

 The entire reason Hashem took us out of Egypt was for this reason and on this condition. This is what it’s all about. And what is the mitzva?

 Masor atzmecha v’kadesh shemi- give yourself up and sanctify My name.

U’Kishe’moser atzmo, yimsor al atzmo al menas la’mus- when you give yourself up, do it on the condition that you will die. And not that you will be miraculously saved.

 Our mitzva is to sanctify Hashem. To be martyred. To be “shahid-“ed. In doing that, Hashem’s name becomes sanctified. He sanctifies us. His name, that is within us, becomes revealed. There’s a fine nuance in that. It’s not Hashem who becomes sanctified. It’s His Name. The mitzva is called Kiddush Hashem. The sin of not fulfilling it is called Chilul Hashem. Hashem isn’t God. The translation of the word ‘Ha-Shem’ is “the Name”. Hashem is kadosh- is Holy, is separate from everything physical and material that we experience. We don’t sanctify Him. He’s already holy. We sanctify His Name.

What does that mean? What was our Exodus all about? How is His Name sanctified? The Name of Hashem is His signature on Creation. It’s the letter that we possess in our souls with His name on it that we are meant to deliver to the world. The word ‘Chilul’, comes from the word ‘chalal’- a vacuum. In modern Hebrew it is outer space. A big dark void. When one makes a chilul Hashem, then what you are doing is removing the light and letter of Hashem that is here in this world and creating a vacuum. When one denies Hashem, when one covers up His name, when someone says that living another day is the most important thing in this world, then they are placing their lives at the center and Hashem’s name becomes profaned. It falls into a black hole.

 Pharaoh in Egypt understood this, and this was particularly his agenda. Give them work. Make their lives revolve around staying alive another day. Let them live from telush to telush- pay stub to pay stub. From meal to meal, from day to day. The light and letter inside of us was getting erased, was becoming a void. There was a chilul Hashem. Hashem took us out to create a Kiddush Hashem. To create a nation that is willing to stand up and say that life isn’t the purpose within itself. Life is about revealing Hashem in the world. He took us out to create a nation that is willing to declare to the world that they understand that Chilul Hashem-a world without the Name of Hashem, is one that we are willing to give up our lives to make sure never happens.

 There is “Ani Hashem” within us. There’s a letter in our pocket, in our hearts, it is our very essence and soul. We are sanctified by Hashem already. We just need to be moser atzmo- we need to deliver ourselves. We need to remove our own ego, our sensed that life is about us rather than Him. When we are moser atzmo- and deliver that letter we remove taht chilul Hashem and Hashem becomes revealed. It will be read by the world.

 Now to be clear, we are not a nation of death and martyrdom. We don’t have 70 brides waiting up in heaven for us. We don’t even live or do anything for reward or for fear of punishment. Last week’s parsha taught us, precisely the opposite. V’Chai Ba’hem- we are meant to live and fulfill the mitzvos. If there is a danger to one’s life, then not only should we violate the commandment in order to live, but one who sacrifices their life for any command-besides the three biggies (idolatry, adultery and murder), is considered as if he took his own life needlessly. If you’re sick and at risk of life then you’re obligated to violate Shabbos, to eat on Yom Kippur and even have an abortion. We are a religion of life. Because we understand that our lives have the highest purpose and only when we are alive can we deliver and reveal Hashem and bring out the sanctification of His Name.

Yet that is all premised and conditioned on if that’s what our lives are about.  It’s if at the center of the lives we understand have been granted to us, is to being willing to give it up in order to reveal the Ani Hashem that is the heart of those lives and the mitzvos that we do. We’re not here to observe a series of commandments and rituals to get reward in the World to Come. We’re here to live, and through all the mitzvos that we do reveal that our entire lives are just one message to the world. We have a letter to deliver. That we will give up our lives to deliver. It is to tell the entire world that it is really full of His glory. They have a letter to deliver too. The letter is written to them.

 Our Chayalim are the ones that are delivering those letters to the world today. The word chayal itself is the same as chilul with one difference, the letter ‘yud’-Hashem’s name is at there center. The chayal transforms the chilul into holiness. With their sacrifice, with their one-minded focus and determination to give it all up for Klal Yisrael, for Eretz Yisrael, with their singing and dancing “Am Yisrael Chai”, they are declaring, not just that we are alive, but that we are the essence of life. We possess the secret of what life really is about. Od Avinu Chai- our Father lives within us.

With all your darkness, with all your evil, with all your politics, with all your attempts to destroy that letter through every generation, we live. We will never die. Dying happens when one’s entire existence is defined by their physical existence. Life, which is eternal, reveals itself when one’s identity transcends this world. It’s when we understand that Ani Hashem is within us. Just as He is eternal so are we. That is the Kiddush Hashem. That is the letter that our lives are meant to deliver.

 Each day when we pray shemona esrei we recite the first three essential blessings. The first is twhere we come from. It is the book of Bereishit and Shemot. We are the children of Avraham, Yitzchak and Yaakov. The second blessing is the blessing of our lives. Hashem not only Gives life, but he Gave us an eternal life that is mechayei meisim- that will give life to the dead. He is meimis u’mechaya- He brings death and He brings back to life. We never die. When we understand that, we then come to the third blessing Ata Kadosh, we recite Kedusha. We reveal the holiness of Hashem in this world.

 Every Jew, no matter how disconnected from Judaism, recites the Kaddish. We understand that death is not final. There is holiness, that continues and perhaps even shines greatest in death. Kaddish is that letter that every Jew recites when their loved one dies. It’s what’s being recited by so many parents this year for their sons who have fallen, for their loved ones who were killed. It’s the letter that those that perhaps didn’t merit to actually write those letters to their loved ones, but that their deaths al kiddush Hashem on behalf of our people and our land has been written. Yisgadel Vi’yitkadesh Shemei Rabba- the Name of Hashem has gotten greater and greater. It’s been revealed. The letter has been delivered. Enough of them have already been read. So many Kaddishes, so many letters, so many millennia of martyrs. It’s time for the Mo’ed to begin. For the rest of the book of Vayikra. For us to come to the land.

 Acharey Mos, Kedoshim- after the death of all the martyrs. Emor- we say, we read, we declare, Behar- on the mountain, that holy mountain that we await to rebuild Your house. Bechukosai-where we will finally be able to understand and fulfill your decrees, the words and letters that are chakuk- that you have engraved upon our hearts.

  Have a holy Shabbos,

Rabbi Ephraim Schwartz

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CHIZUK/TZEDAKA OPPORTUNITY OF THE WEEK 

Moshav Tkuma Fueling Heros, Nourishing Courage - 7 kilometers from the Gaza border lies Moshav Tkuma. Hamas terrorists drove by the Moshav on October 7th, and by miracle did not enter. Avichai and Keren Koch, devoted friends and members of Moshav Tkuma have found themselves at the forefront of a much needed, lifesaving operation. Their son has enlisted as an IDF soldier stationed in Gaza and they have evolved their preexisting fruit packing warehouses into a much needed supply and food stop for soldiers.

Tens of thousands of soldiers are stationed on the border of Gaza and frequent their location to receive a warm meal. They are currently baking on average 200 pies of pizza a day, with many unit commanders coming from Gaza to pick up warm food for their brave soldiers. They have opened a tent on the property where hundreds of soldiers come daily at night to enjoy a hot meat meal and live entertainment. They also send over 500 shabbat meals/packages into Gaza every week. When they have a stock of desired supplies, the IDF soldiers graciously accept all of them. The Moshav Tkuma operation is running solely on donations to ensure they have the stock of supplies and food needed so the soldiers can come to recharge and restock. The list as of today includes many items such as socks, underwear, tactical knee Pads, rain covers, sleeping bags, tents, neck gaiters, thermal wear, headlamps, camelbak bladders, warm gear for sleeping, showers, etc…. Please join us in this cause to support our heroes in and around Moshav Tkuma. Thank you for considering our proposal and for your potential contribution to this vital endeavor. Sincerely, Avichai and Keren Koch & Arielle Setton 

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1Ardm3CixAM  

and in English

https://youtu.be/ydxFtrioJuQ

And here’s the link to donate                

 DONATE TO THE CAMPAIGN

https://givebutter.com/kerensplace

 YIDDISH PROVERB OF THE WEEK

" Az dos harts iz ful, geyen di oygn iber.” - When the heart is full, the eyes overflow.        

RABBI SCHWARTZ'S TOUR GUIDE EXAM QUESTION OF THE WEEK

answer below at end of Email

6. The name of the preacher’s stage in a mosque is____.

The battle that caused the split between the Shia and the Sunni took place in:

A)  Iraq

B) Iran .

C) Egypt

D) the Land of Israel

 RABBI SCHWARTZ’S COOL VIDEO OF THE WEEK

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IynusNhRce4 – Im not the biggest Acapella fan..but here’s a great playlist if your into it and are having music withdrawal.

 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YKWvPXKa678  - Beuatiful Old time Ahavas Yisrael from Yehudah song sung Acapella Baruch Levine…

 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iByY7AmZ0PQ&t=88s  –  SORRY ABOUT LAST WEEK HERE”S THE CORRECT LINK to --Reb Shlomo Carlebach two incredible stories that You Never know.. loving and hating for this week’s parsha.

 https://www.mako.co.il/mako-vod-keshet/eretz_nehederet-s21/shorts/Video-bc5ab3041987f81026.htm - Funny Eretz Nehederet Yom Ha’atzmaut skit for the Hebrew speakers…

 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oNyhjjW0Suc&list=OLAK5uy_nWlrXERoIO8ewiv_hBIfaWkm1SKPtflJY  –  Ein Zeh Hastara by Mendy Worch and the Thank You Hashem Chevra… Beuatiful twist on Hastara song…

 RABBI SCHWARTZ’S PARSHA PRAYER INSPIRATION OF THE WEEK

 Biblical or Rabbinical?- We’ve spent a half or year discussing Tefilla- Prayer, and yet we haven’t yet discussed what the obligation is. It’s time… There is a famous dispute between the Rambam and the Ramban whether this is a biblical obligation or not. The Rambam repeatedly counts the mitzva to daven once a day minimally as a biblical obligation of V’Avadatem es Hashem- the service the Torah tells us we must have of Hashem. The Ramban disagrees and brings various sources from the Talmud that seem to say quite clearly that prayer is rabbinical.

 There are exceptions though. Both the Ramban and Rambam agree that when a person or the nation is in a time of trouble then there mitzva from the Torah to turn to Hashem. The entire function of the trouble is for us in fact to turn our eyes to Hakadosh Baruch Hu and realize that it is only through Him that we can find salvation. So now, in war, when so many of our brothers and children are in danger daily, every psalm of Tehillim that you recite is in fact a biblical  mitzva… not bad…

 In this week’s Torah portion interestingly enough, and you might miss this-as I did for years- the Ramban writes of another biblical obligation. The Rav of Karmiel, Rav Margalit, in his incredible sefer Mapik Margalit, notes that the Ramban writes that when the Torah describes the mitzva of the holidays that the Torah tells us that these are appointed times which we are “Mikra’ei Kodesh” – which we should call out to be holiday. The Ramban explains this Mitzva that there is a biblical mitzva for us to gather in the House of Hashem on the appointed days,

 “in order to sanctify the day publicly with prayer and praise to Hashem in clean garments and to make them days of feasting…”  

 The Pri Megadim thus notes that according to this Ramban it would seem that prayer on the holidays is as well in fact a biblical commandment. ‘’

 Rav Margalit suggests perhaps, based on the Ohr Samayach, that this might be a Rabbinic Mitzva that has the stature of a biblical one. Since our sages saw that Hashem wanted us to pray, by commanding us to do so in times of trouble. So our sages thus understood and commanded based on that that one should do so on holidays as well. He compares this Mitzva to the Rambam’s opinion of the mitzva to remember our exodus of leaving Egypt, daily. There as well, he notes that the opinion of the Rambam is that it would be Rabbinical, but that the Rabbis decreed it because they understood that since Hashem wanted us to remember the story as He cold us on Pesach night, they understood it is Ratzon Hashem and thus decreed its daily prayer based on that.

So what comes out from all this, that certainly to appreciate that tefilla is our basic service to Hashem. Hashem wants our prayers and there is a mitzva to do so biblically in times of trouble. As well all agree that it is the will of Hashem on special occasions that we not just celebrate with Hashem, but talk to Him. Communicate and praise Him. A Moed is our date, and Hashem doesn’t want us to be awkwardly quiet, or focused on the food on the table. He’s our date for the night, spend the time communicating with Him.

 RABBI SCHWARTZ'S ERA’S AND THEIR PLACES AND PEOPLE IN ISRAEL OF THE WEEK

701 BC-Appropriate Measures?-  As we said last week, with Sancheirev coming to siege Yerushalayim after destroying 46 cities in Yehudah and the destruction of the city of Lachish, which second to Jerusalem was the most fortified in Yehuda, Chizkiya took various measures to defend the city. One of those measures the Navi told us was the sealing up of the springs around Yerushalayim and particularly the Gichon Spring which brought the water to the city. He rerouted the waters through an underground tunnel which we spoke about last week, as the famous Chizkiya’s tunnel in the Ir Dovid today. Was this a good thing or not? I mean besides for the fact that there is now something fun for me to do with tourists and families besides just all the history of the old city on a Jerusalem tour.

 Now, I’m sure that many, especially those that have toured the tunnels with a good guide have heard that the Talmud (Brachos 10b) teaches us that the this one of the three things that our sages did not agree with Chizkiya on; along with sending the doors of the Heichal to Sancheirev and the adding an extra month of Nissan to the year- both of which we’ve spoke about. Yet fascinatingly enough the simple verses don’t seem to say this was a problem and it even seems to say that Chizkiya did discuss this decision with the sages and it doesn’t tell us of any issues that they had with it.

 Fascinatingly enough the Radak brings the Avos D’rebbi Nasan midrash (2:4) that writes that this was one of four things that Hashem did agree with Chizkiya about and even made him successful as the Navi tells us. Even more fascinating in the prayers that we recite on Hoshana Rabba we ask Hashem to save us and bring water and rain in the merit of Chizkiya who stuffed up the springs of water in the face the blasphemer (Sancheirev). There are a few approaches, as there usually is amongst the commentaries.

 The Chida suggests that there were some sages that that felt it was a proper thing and others that felt that he should have faith. And even though most disagreed with Chizkiya, but ultimately Hashem decided to make Chizkiya successful because he did follow the words of some of the sages. The Malbim similarly takes a different approach that although the sages disagreed with Chizkiya, Hashem allowed him to be successful but only as a test to see if he would have faith in Hashem or not, which ultimately he did.

 But perhaps the most fascinating approach is that of the Maharsha as explained by Rav Neria who differentiates between the plugging up of all the springs and then specifically of the Gichon spring. He even seems to suggest that if one is medakdek and looks carefully at the words of the midrashim and the verses and the Hoshana Rabba piyyut it seems to suggest that they are referring to separate springs. That whereas all of the other springs the sages felt it was prudent and appropriate for Chizkiya to block up, the Gichon spring was different. That spring the sages felt he should’ve let along. Rav Neriah explains perhaps that since that specific spring was used for all of the rituals associated with the Beit Ha’Mikdash, then Chizkiya shouldn’t have messed with it. Just as the house of Hashem didn’t require any extraordinary measures to protect it, the spring of Gichon has that same sanctity and its almost a defilement of the site to plug it up. To shut down a holy place because of danger from an enemy is not right. The sages felt he shouldn’t do it. It’s a desecration.

Does that have anything to do with the decision to shut down Meron and the tomb of the Rashbi on Lag Ba’Omer this year because of the threat of Hezballa terrorists? You decide…😊  

 RABBI SCHWARTZ'S TERRIBLE MAIL JOKES OF THE WEEK

Today I went to the post office to mail 20 letters... so I bought 20 stamps...

and the clerk just handed them to me. So I said "Am I supposed to stick all these on myself?"...and she said "No. Stick them on the envelopes.."                                                            

 An elephant went to the post office to get a PO Box. The clerk was happy to address the elephant in the room.

 Did you know if you rearrange the letters in "THE POST OFFICE" Nobody gets their mail.

 Why don't women work at the post office? It's a mail dominated industry.

 A marine biologist walks into the post office and says he needs to send a large tank overnight. The postal worker asks for the dimensions of the tank and when the biologist gives them to him the postal worker says, "We can't send a tank that big overnight. It'll have to go by freight train."

The biologist pleads with the postal worker. He says, "That tank contains a marine mammal that is very sick. Can't you make an exception and send it by air overnight so that it can get the treatment it needs? I've been working with him for years and he’s one of the sweetest, smartest animals I've encountered. Here's a photo."

The postal worker looks at the photo and thinks for a moment, and then he says, "Okay. We can make an exception. But only for this express porpoise."

 A guy walks into a post office one day to see a middle-aged, balding man standing at the counter methodically placing "Love" stamps on bright pink envelopes with hearts all over them. He then takes out a perfume bottle and starts spraying scent all over them.

His curiosity getting the better of him, he goes up to the balding man and asks him what he is doing. The man says "I'm sending out 1,000 Valentine cards signed, 'Guess who?'"

"But why?" asks the man.

"I'm a divorce lawyer," the man replies.

 Why don't you put a post office next to a liberal arts college? They'll always argue over the male agenda.

 What begins with a P, ends with an E and has a million letters in it? Post office

 Why will the U.S. Post Office never issue a Donald Trump stamp? Because 60 percent of Americans would spit on the front side, and 40 percent would lick the back side..

 The problem with the American two-party system is that everyone agrees one political party is stupid and the other party is evil. But they violently disagree about which one is which.

 I was at the Post Office, when I saw a blonde woman shouting into an envelope.

I asked, "what are you doing ??"

The blonde replied, "Sending a voice mail"....

 Odd how you can only send mail during the day. They are called post office hours, after all. OYY…

 The new mailman is delivering a registered parcel and needs a signature, so he rings the doorbell. Sadie sticks her head out of the bedroom window and says, "Nu, what is it?"

"I have a registered parcel for Mrs. Levy," he replies.

"Is it wrapped in fancy gift paper or just plain brown paper?" Sadie asks.

"Ordinary brown paper, madam," he replies.

"So who is it from?" Sadie asks.

"It's from Macy's department store," he replies.

"Does it say from which branch?" Sadie asks.

"Yes, madam," he replies, "it's from Main Street."

"Does it say what's in it?" Sadie asks.

"It says it's from their Cooking ware department," he replies. "Will you now come down and sign for it, please."

"Sorry," replies Sadie, "I can't do that."

"Why not?" he asks.

"Because," Sadie replies, "I'm Sadie Cohen. Mrs. Levy lives next door."!

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 The answer to this week”s question is A– I got this one right but the truth is I really didn’t think I would. I mean the second part was easy. I knew that the battle was not in Iran, Egypt, or Israel. I wasn’t sure if it was Syria or Iraq but I probably would’ve gone with Iraq anyways which was the right answer as Syria wasn’t even a choice. Not that I knew it was called the battle of Karballa. Islam and Arabs are not my thing. The first part of the question though I really thought I didn’t know. I guessed Minbar would be the answer, although I was pretty sure I was wrongn and a Minbar was the hole in the wall that points to Mecca. But I didn’t know any other word So I gueesed it and I was right! The groove in the wall is called a Michrab in case you care… So anyways I got another one  right and the score is now.  Rabbi Schwartz 5 and Ministry of Tourism 1 on this exam so far.

Downs and Ups- Parshat Toldos 5784 2023

 

Insights and Inspiration

from the

Holy Land

from

Rabbi Ephraim Schwartz

"Your friend in Karmiel"

November 17^th 2023 -Volume 13 Issue 6 4^th of Kisleiv 5784

 

Parshat Toldos

 

Downs and Ups

 

I’m not a roller coaster type person. It’s not that I’m scared of them. I’ve grown up a bit since my father took me on Space Mountain when I was 8 years old and made them stop the ride in the middle because I thought I was having a heart attack. I’m pretty confident that I’m not going to die if I go on one. I just don’t enjoy even the thrill of the slight chance that it might happen. Which to be honest, I’m not sure why anyone really does.

 

Life is good. I don’t feel the need to escape from it. I don’t like to think about the fact that it might not always be here. The “it” being me. See… I don’t even like to say it or write it… I like things to keep going the way they are. Slight improvements or small ups and downs are good- even exciting at some points. But I don’t need to go up slowly in a small open-air car on a tiny track to the top of an insanely twisted railroad track with crazy drops, again and again to get a high out of life.

 

It’s one of the reasons why this month has been particularly challenging for me. Because as much as I don’t like amusement park roller coasters- that pales as to what I feel about emotional roller coasters. Being married to a woman who was pregnant multiple times was more than traumatic enough for me. I like to be happy-always. Funn- always. Inspired-always. I can deal with a small drops here and there, but really I like the steady heartbeat.

 

I don’t know how women do it to be frank. Those highs, those lows, those hormonal emotional ups and downs that they have to go through. I never appreciated the bracha I made each day of shelo asani isha- until I married one. Until I got to know one really well, that wasn’t my mother or sister. Since then, I thank Hashem every day that I don’t have to go through those emotional swings. I can just be happy, inspired Rabbi Schwartz. Until this past month… When everything changed.

 

No, I’m not pregnant. I’m not even fat- although without tour guiding as I sit on the couch and am not out there running and hiking around Israel a few pounds have come back. But I renewed my gym membership. Yeah... it’s Corona-take-II, for tour guides. So, no I’m not carrying a baby around growing in my belly. But it kind of feels that I have the weight of the world on my shoulders. On all of our shoulders. And the emotional swings of this party are not doing me well at all.

 

The first three days were shock, grief and even fear. How can this happen? Where is this going? Where is everyone? The Army…the police…Hashem? Is this for real? After that there was anger, rage, betrayal and fury. The focus of course wasn’t just on the Hamas, although the horror and real vengeful, destroy-Amalek sentiment that I can say I never honestly felt before against an entire nation men women children babies…all of them was a new emotion for me. Rather it was against our government or lack thereof here. How could they have let this happened. How could they be so blinded. How could they continue to abandon their citizens? Why are they not doing more? Where are they? What are they? It was horrible. And to a large degree it still is.

 

And then there were the tears. The non-stop flow of tears that just keep coming at random moments. I’m still glued to the news- for better and for worse. And it doesn’t stop and perhaps it shouldn’t. Families of hostages, of soldiers that have fallen, of so so many that went through the Holocaust of October 7^th and 8^th and 9^th…. Listening to the constant barrage of tears of the 150,000 people that are refugees in our own country and can’t go home and don’t even know when or if they will return. Children who miss their homes, their friends, Businesses shutting down one after another, farmers who after Shemitta and the post-shemitta year are now seeing their fields and crops going to pot. The pain is so great, so deep, so endless. And so so personal. It is so dark.

 

And yet the roller coaster has ups. Incredible ups and slopes and tracks that we are climbing to heights never before. The Achdus/ Unity is insane.  The love of one jew to another, the disappearance of any hatred, any enmity any resentment or holier-than-thou ism that we suffered and divided us for so long. The not-normal revelation of Hashem in the world. In our world. In our soldiers, in the so many keeping Shabbos, wearing tefillin, tzitzis in the unparalleled chesed in the history of Klal Yisrael. In Egypt the Torah tells us “Ein bayis asher ein sham meis- there was no house that didn’t have a dead body. Well today there is no Jewish home anywhere in the world that not only doesn’t feel that they have lost someone, but that hasn’t done something whether it is to donate, to bake something, to take food, supplies, to daven, to learn, to comfort, to cry, to march, to post- there isn’t a Jew that hasn’t connected to do this and revealed the oneness of our nation and our God and it is inspiring. It’s mind-blowing. It’s as high as it gets.

 

There have been moments of pride. Proud of our soldiers, proud of our citizens, of our family. There are lots of funny laughing moments and fantastic memes and jokes and humor that we always seem to find in these situations. There’s lots of singing, of new songs, of concerts, of inspiration. Manny Matara- Sha- Gerrrr and Eretz Nehederet spoofs. There have been moments of unreal joy- and that’s not just for the Bris of my grandson a few weeks ago and his upcoming pidyon haben this week- but when miracles took place, when we returned to our homeland, when that hostage was rescued-that was out of the park!

 

There are those tear-jerking moments, the so so many Army base weddings taking place, the proposals, the births and the bar mitzvas. Those video clips of the soldiers coming home to their children, to their parents with that song they keep playing again and again. As I said, it’s been a roller coaster of emotions. Are you feeling pregnant just reading this? It’s like we woke up the day after Simchas Torah on emotional steroids. The ups and downs keep coming. But yet the month of light in the darkness, of miracles and of salvations is here. The ride is getting closer to the end.

 

As we enter this month we open up the chumash as we do every week and look for today’s message to me. Oh and for you too… We’ve finally reached the point of the birth of the third and last of our Patriarchs Yaakov; the father of the 12 tribes from whom we descend. As well we get his brother our Uncle Esau, who pretty much by the end of the parsha resolves to kill us. And he’s still trying to. We also have the final stories of the life of Yitzchak vs the Philistines in Gerar, non-coincidentally located in Gaza. His wife is taken from him. He’s subject to severe antisemitism. He even calls the well that he dug and that they fought with him over Sitna- hatred.

It’s actually fascinating if you read the text. The first well he dug, it says he called Iska- contention, because they fought with him over it. The third well which they didn’t fight with him over, he called Rechovot- as Hashem has widened our place and made us fruitful in the land. Yet that middle one which he called Sitna- hatred, it doesn’t say why he called it that. The answer I’ve seen given is because as opposed to the first well where he fell under the “contzeptzia” that they were fighting over land, over wells, over water, over whatever… When they continued to fight with him even after he gave it to them, he understood that the whole time it was all about hate. Hate doesn’t have a reason. They’re just hateful, spiteful, Philistine animals that can’t tolerate the Jew in our land. It’s not necessary to give a reason for it. It’s self-understood.

 

But that’s not what my E-Mail is about this week. That’s just a bonus. The moment that really stood out for me is the roller-coaster ride at the end of the Parsha. Here we have Yitzchak getting ready to pass his blessing down to his son. This is not just a bracha- this moment is really the fulfillment of all of Creation. In Yitzchak’s mind it’s a return to Gan Eden. Yaakov will be the spiritual heir and Esau will be his material partner in bringing Hashem’s glory out to the world. Unlike his father Avraham who had two wives and a Yishmael. Yitzchak has only one wife. He was brought up at the akeida and offered as a sacrifice. He knows that his entire job in life is to bring the world to its fulfillment. It’s Pesach night. It’s the night of the redemption. It’s also Yitzchak’s birthday as he was born on Pesach- as we know that our eventual exile takes place 400 years to the day from his birth. He’s literally at the footsteps of Mashiach. When Yaakov comes in, he smells Gan Eden, the food that he tastes our heavenly. It’s a Pesach Seder. He’s ready to open the door for Eliyahu. And then the ride goes downhill.

 

Eliyahu is not at the door. It’s Esau. And Yitzchak trembles the greatest shudder of his life. Rashi tells us he sees Gehenom open up in front of him. The Midrash and Zohar tells us that he sees everything that will happen from this moment on. He sees the destructions of the Temple, He sees the Crusades, He sees the inquisition, the Holocaust, the 6 million. He sees Simchas Torah 5784. Beeri, Kfar Azza, the soldiers, the pain, the horror and the terror. And he shudders. And he is terrified for he realizes that everything that he thought he knew. Everything that he thought should and would be. The son, Esau, that he loved, that he had banked so much on. That he had planned the future with. That ultimately would be essential to Hashem’s plan of revealing His presence to the world had sold it. It wasn’t going to happen. It would all be up to Yaakov now.

 

The path that Yaakov would have to take was going to be terrifying, long, and full of turmoil. It was going to be a roller coaster ride between these two brothers. One would be up, and one would be down. The day that he had hoped for, that his father had been blessed with, that Hashem was waiting for, when the entire world would find Him and bask in His glory, would require Yaakov to not only do the work of Esau with the hands of Esau that he had taken for himself, but he would still have to remain Yaakov. He would have to unite the two parts of himself. The two parts of his nation and his descendants. Then and only then would Esau become subject to him and recognize the blessing that he could only get from Hashem through Yaakov.

 

There is a fascinating statement in the Talmud Yerushalmi. Rav Hoshiya says

Gadol kiddush Hashem mei’chilul Hashem- The sanctification of Hashem’s name is greater than the desecration of Hashem’s name.

 

The Talmud proves this point from the law that on the one hand we see that we are prohibited from leaving a body of a criminal who had been executed hanging over night. Yet, at the same time we find in Navi that Shaul’s children who were executed were left hanging for months in order to publicize the sin that they did and to sanctify Hashem’s name.

 

Rav Tzvi Yehuda Kook though would often quote this Talmud and explain its seemingly simple and perplexing statement. After-all it would seem obvious that a sanctification of Hashem’s name is great and a Chilul Hashem is not. Rather he understands the wording of the Talmud to be that it is not that kiddush Hashem is greater than a Chilul Hashem- but rather that it is greater “mei- chilul Hashem”- from a desecration of Hashem’s name. When the Kiddush Hashem comes from a desecration of Hashem’s name it is and will always be greater. It will be the greatest light to happen.

 

Do you know what a Chilul Hashem is, he would ask? The Holocaust is the greatest chilul Hashem. For a chilul- a desecration, comes from the word chalal- empty space- chol- mundane or absent of God. When Hashem’s name is not apparent. When it is hidden. When all we see is evil. When the righteous are exterminated, murdered, butchered. When His nation are like sheep to the slaughter. That’s the biggest Chilul Hashem. And from that Chilul Hashem came the return to Israel. Came the State. It was a light that the world had waited 2000 years to experience.

 

It’s not only then. It’s always that way. The destruction of the first Temple led to the light of the story of Purim, and the miracle of our salvation and the rebuilding of the Temple. The chilul Hashem of the Hellenists and the Greeks and our assimilation during the second Temple led to the eternal holiday of Chanuka and the Kiddush Hashem that we celebrate annually still over 2000 years later. The destruction of the second Temple led to the Mishna, the Jerusalem Talmud, the Babylonian one. The Crusades led to the period of the Rishonim. The expulsion from Spain, the Torah in America. The ups follow the downs. The Kiddush Hashem that comes from the Chilul Hashem is from where the greatest light will come out.

 

The truth is that is the story of our biblical ancestors. It’s the entire Torah and book of Bereishis. Avraham’s success and downfall and success again and downfall. It’s Yitzchak’s story. It will be Yaakov’s story, the tribe’s story, Yosef and Egypt and our first Exodus on Pesach. It’s the roller coaster of Jewish history and life. It’s an eternal one. It’s an emotional one. It’s a tragic painful one, yet it’s the one that will bring Mashiach. One whose ride is almost over. Whose pregnancy will finally give birth.

 

The past 75 years here in Eretz Yisrael have been perhaps the greatest and most intense roller coaster ride of all. Built on the Chilul Hashem of the ashes of the crematoria and the martyrdom of the 6 million Kedoshim our state was born. Yet, that state was not one that was ready yet to acknowledge Hashem’s hand. The founders weren’t and the Jews that chose to remain in galus didn’t either. We didn’t have Yerushalayim. We didn’t feel we needed it. We were going to continue “rebuilding” in America spiritually and in Israel economically and materially. We didn’t bring Yaakov’s voice and the hands we took from Esau together in the country we were meant to. Thus the chilul Hashem got greater and greater and led to the 6-day war only 19 years after our founding. Yet, the miracles that came from that Chilul Hashem when we were abandoned by the world and when we thought we would lose it all brought perhaps the greatest Kiddush Hashem. We quadrupled our country, we got back all our holy places. We saw Hashem. Many started to return. Teshuva happened. The light was great. We were on the way up. And then we lost it.

The roller coaster took a downturn again. Kochi V’otzem yadi- our strength, our power, our army became the “contzeptzia”. Frum Jews that hadn’t moved decided that they didn’t need to. That they couldn’t. That we need to wait. That it’s not time. And the land mourned. And the miracles ceased. And the chalal- the hole and void got bigger and bigger. Yom Kippur came and we lost thousands. We were broken. We were terrified. Hashem saved us, yet the miracles were hidden. This wasn’t a 6- Day war. This didn’t give us any more land. This was a test to see if we could finally get the message and do what we need to do. And we didn’t. We made an even greater Chilul Hashem.

 

Sure we learned. Sure we strengthened our Torah. Sure we even moved to Israel. But it wasn’t together. We were divided. The frum for the frum. The Left for the left. The settlers for the settlers. In 2005 we had perhaps the next black day of chilul Hashem. We left Gaza. We left Gush Katif. We threw out 7000 Jews from their home. We made a deal with “Avimelech” of Gerar. We assumed it was just an “iska” when it was a “sitna”.

 

But it wasn’t their “sitna” for us. It was ours for one another. It was a lack of appreciation of how every inch of this land is ours from our forefathers. It’s from Hashem for all of us to live in. For all of us to inherit. For all of us to unabashedly declare that to the world.. For us to wipe out every single smelly Arab that doesn’t want to accept that. And by the way there are many many that actually serve in the army and really do want to live here in a Jewish State. It is possible. It’s what’s supposed to be. It’s what we are supposed to bring the world to see. It’s why we took the hands of Esau to use with our voice of Yaakov. It’s the end of the roller coaster ride and the last big twist and turn before the greatest kiddush Hashem finally is revealed.

 

It’s not fun being on a roller coaster. It’s not fun to be pregnant. Yet Hashem has put us on that ride. He put that baby in all of our tummies. There is a reason why the era of Mashiach is called by our sages as the birth pangs. It’s not just the actual real pain of the birth. It’s the 2000 year emotional pregnancy that we’ve been walking around with that is taking it’s final toll. Yet, the end is around the corner. We’re in the birthing room already. The crib is waiting for us. The light is getting brighter and brighter. I can smell the Kiddush. It smells like Gan Eden. The 5784-year-old chulent has been cooking for a long time. It’s going to be a real “Kiddush” Hashem.

  

Have holy hartzigeh Shabbos,

Rabbi Ephraim Schwartz 

This week's Insights and Inspirat

************************

YIDDISH PROVERB OF THE WEEK

“Aroif kletert men pavolyeh; arop kolert men zich shnell.”. – Uphill one climbs slowly downhill you roll fast.

RABBI SCHWARTZ'S TOUR GUIDE EXAM QUESTION OF THE WEEK

answer below at end of Email

 

14.The use of Muqarnas in architecture in Israel started in the ___________ period.

Under the auspices of which country did the Catholics operate during the Ottoman period?

A. Turkey

B. Italy

C. Spain

D. France

RABBI SCHWARTZ’S COOL VIDEO OF THE WEEK

 

https://soundcloud.com/ephraim-schwartz/good-shabbos    – It's been a few weeks and you probably miss this song. Here it is my Good Shabbos song!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=olxRpPMfVGg   – Ishai Ribbo and Omar Adam in Washington DC

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lDIupxVmnLo  -  Hillarious Eretz Nehedert BBC Sinwar interview spoof

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1IiqIDCYZRs     - Shulem Lemmer Holocaust survivors song for Israeli Hostages

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c0_WM5iKOfE   – Ahavas Chinam Shuki Solomon…

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-JBMG5mkg_s    –Miami Boys Choir latest- We stand with Israel.

 

 

RABBI SCHWARTZ’S PARSHA PRAYER INSPIRATION OF THE WEEK

 

Praying for others Mincha – The Torah portion this week tells us an incredible story about a special thought and approach to Tefilla that I sessential for us to feel particularly at this point in time. The parsha tells us that Yitzchak and Rivka after they had been married for 10 years and didn't have any children realized that she was barren. Rashi notes that unlike his father Avraham and even his son Yaakov, he was unable to take another wife or maidservant to marry him and produce children because since he was brought up a sacrifice by the akeida, he was sanctified and couldn't have a maidservant wife. So Rashi tells us that he went into one corner and prayed and Rivka went into the other corner and prayed.

 

There are a few puzzling things about these Rashi's. Did Yitzchak and Rivkah not pray for the entire 10 years that they would have children. Wouldn't anyone pray once they got married to have kids? Rashi as well seems to note that it was because he couldn't take another wife that they both went to pray. Really?! Is that what it took? And why does Rashi tell us they prayed in the corner? Who cares if they davened in their shul, in their kitchen, living room, study or in Uman? What does this make a difference?

 

I heard an incredible insight explaining a similar story in the Talmud in Ketuvot (62:). It tells us that the Rebbi Yehudah Hanasi married his son off to the daughter of Rebbi Yosi Ben Zimra. They got married and then he went off to study for 12 years, as it seems was the agreement and custom back then. Lock in the marriage when they're young and they'll finish the deal after the learns a bit. When he returned from his studies, they tried to have children and realized she was infertile. So the Talmud tells us that the two rabbis discussed the options. He couldn't take another wife because then it would look bad that he kept her waiting for 12 years like this. He couldn't take another wife because then people would shame her and say she is only his mistress. Therefore with no other option they decided to pray, and what do you know? She had children.

 

Once again this is a very strange story. Why do they have to go through all the options first? Did not the great Rebbi and Rebbi Yosi not understand what seemingly every one of us does; that we should daven.

 

The answer is that there is prayer and then there is prayer. As long as one feels that there are other options on the table, their prayers will not reach the ultimate sincerity. They won't hit home the way they are meant to. For them really to accomplish the maximum one has to feel that they have nowhere else to turn. They are in a corner. There's no right, there's no left. Their back is against the wall. That was the reason they eliminated all other options before their prayer. That is why Yitzchak and Rivkah’s prayer after 10 years were the most heartfelt when they realized he couldn't take another wife. That's why it tells us they davened in the corner.

 

We have a father in heaven that is waiting for us to turn our hearts to Him and understand that besides Him there are no other options. After 2000 years of Exile we have returned here to Eretz Yisrael. Yet, as we see and Hashem is telling us it’s not enough. that we have a home, a refuge, a place to settle a country even to shine out the light to the world from. We need our Father back here as well. He hasn't yet sent Mashiach perhaps because we still feel we have other options. Our backs are not yet to the wall. We're not in the corner. Hashem thus thrust us into a corner. We felt lost. We felt that nothing could stop our enemies. We woke up and we davened like never before. We still need those type of prayers.

 

We have entered the month of Kislev. It is a month of miracles. It is the darkest Shabbos of the year this week and it is in that dark corner, in that darkest of months that the light of miracles and of the dedication of the Temple can break through once again. May we merit to have our millennia of prayers for that day finally answered.

 

 

RABBI SCHWARTZ'S ERA’S AND THEIR PLACES AND PEOPLE IN ISRAEL OF THE WEEK

 

Civil War and Jewish Hostages? 620 BC – We know and we’ve learned and our sages repeatedly tell us that the worst things happen to us when we have sinas chinam- when we’re fighting amongst each other. Today, those fights are civil compared to the times of the prophets, we have demonstrations, media posts and lashon hara. We couldn’t possibly imagine Jews taking swords against one another. But that’s exactly what happens at this juncture we are up to in our column. Amatzia the king of Yehuda after his resounding and brutal victory over Edom, is dealing with the pillaging and raids of the tribe of Ephraim from the Northern kingdom who had felt rejected by Amatzia when they were turned away from battle. So Amatzia sends message to Yoash the king of Israel in the North that they should meet in battle and settle this in war. Craziness…

 

Yoash tries to beg out and warns Amatzia that he’s messing with the wrong Kingdom. Remember the Northern Kingdom is 10 tribes against the two of Yehuda and Binyamin. As well fascinatingly enough the Northern Kingdom looked upon themselves as being more righteous. Since Yoash is a grandson of Yehu that had killed out the house of Achav, the only remaining members of Achav’s house were from his daughter (or sister) Atalia who had married Amatzia’s grandfather Achazya. So ironically we have the King of Yehuda being considered rightfully so not frum enough as they are looked upon as Achav’s descendants. And Yoash who is a grandson of Yehu that killed out Achav’s family felt that it was time to finish the job. Nothing like a family fight and certainly a generational one.

 

So they meet in battle in Beit Shemesh. The fact that the battle took place in Amaztia’s home turf showed that Yoash really wasn’t that scared. They devastated the army of Amatzia who fled back to Jerusalem. There Yoash pillaged the temple taking gold and silver from the Beit Ha’mikdash and even taking children as hostages from the house of Amatzia and his vassals and lords back to the Shomron. They were taken in order to serve as “insurance” that Amatzia would not try to attack him back again. As I said this is pretty insane, especially in light of what we are going through now. Jews taking other Jews as hostages. Using them as protection that they won’t be attacked, and in fact they weren’t. Amatzia was eventually hounded out and assassinated over a decade later by his own servants in the city of Lachish- not far from Beit Shemesh. Probably because they were upset that their hostages were not returned and seemingly he did nothing to return them Yoash on the other hand died right after this story. It’s chaos. And as we will see it spirals down even worse.

 

Kind of makes you feel that we were miles ahead with our petty fights about judicial reform and mechitzas in Tel Aviv and nasty rhetoric. We perhaps have learned the lesson that fighting among ourselves is never a winning strategy.

 

RABBI SCHWARTZ'S FUNNY GAZA MEMES/ JOKES OF THE WEEK

 

Shifa is a hospital like Mengele was a doctor

 

If a Jews is murdered in the woods, does the World make a sound

 

Not everybody likes my new slogan- from the Sea to the River don’t you mess with my shvigger

 

New Monopoly Game Card- “Get out of Jew-Hater Jail Free – when you’re too much of a coward and a hypocrite to admit you hate Jews. Claim you’re an anti-Zionist and not an Anti-Semite

 

Washington Rally Security guards- “umm this rally is for 2 hours, you have enough food for a week.

 

The News used to tell us what happened and we had to decide how we felt about it. Now the News tells us how to feel and we have to decide if it happened.

  

          I       F

       Y    O    U

    C A N T   S  E  E

   WHATS HAPPENING IN

    I S R A E L  Y O U   N E E D

 

TO   BUY   SOME   NEW   GLASSES

 

OK I think that we have to really give it to them. No more mercy. We need to return to them their internet today… But we have to make HOT their provider and let them try to disconnect from them…

 

I have family fighting in Israel now. They’re not in the army… they just fight a lot.

 

A new study out of Johns Hopkins University shows that an increase of gun ownership among Gabbaim correlates with reduced talking during Davening.

 

People now seem afraid that Gaza will be occupied by Israel. Those same people were already saying that Gazs was occupied by Israel. For everyone’s sanity please make up your minds!

 

In response to the call for a boycott of Israeli made products amongs Palestine supporters here is a List of Palestinian Made Products and Companies You can Boycott

1)

2)

3)

4)

5)

Yeah…

 

The answer to this week”s question is D – Got  a half and half on this one. Arab archeology isn’t my strong point, but I knew that much of the architecture we have is in the Mamaluk period that really built a lot. The muqranas is the flowery columns I believe so I got that one right. Churches and all that mishigas is even less my interest. I guessed that the Ottoman which is Turkey was the right answer for Part B, the answer was France. Who cares? Not even interested in googling it. I’ll take the half right and be happy with is.  So got the new score being Rabbi Schwartz at 10 point and the MOT having 4 point on this latest Ministry of Tourism exam.