Mashiach's Kippa- Parshat Vaeira 2025/ 5785

 

Insights and Inspiration from the Holy Land from Rabbi Ephraim Schwartz "Your friend in Karmiel" January 24th 2025 -Volume 14 Issue 13 24th of Tevet 5785   Parshat Vaiera Mashiach’s Kippa It’s the old joke/truth/story about Mashiach. That when he finally comes nobody is going to accept him. The chasidim don’t want him because he’s not wearing a shtreimel. The litvaks because he doesn’t have a black hat. The Daati guys because he doesn’t serve in the army. (Although I think that they believe that he really will- while the more chareidi aren’t really that hung up that they believe he will have a shtreimel or black hat). The modern orthodox want him to have a college degree. It’s a problem he will have. But I guess that’s why he’s Mashiach. He’s going to have to convince everyone that he’s one of them. Or perhaps even more significantly and even more challenging, that we are really one of his. That, my friends, is perhaps an even more challenging job then wiping out Chamas, building the Bais Hamikdash or somehow convincing the Jews in the Diaspora that they should make aliya and leave their way too comfortable galus from the country that is on the cusp of finally becoming Made Great Again. If he can pull getting the Jews to all agree upon him to be Mashiach, that is the greatest mofeis/ miracle/ sign that he’s really the right man. Now the truth is if Klal Yisrael paid much attention to our leaders in the Torah, his job really wouldn’t really be that hard. I mean all our greatest leaders were outsiders. The first King of Israel, I pointed out to my tourists the other day, was King Shaul, who was certainly a tall strapping good looking warrior. Yet, at the same time he came from the tribe of Binyamin, that just a few minutes before were pretty much almost wiped out in a civil war by an army of hundreds of thousands of Jews from every tribe (of which Binyamin themselves killed in the first two battles tens of thousands of their brothers of those other tribes) in the worst civil war in our history following the story of the pilegesh/Concubine of Givah. What? You don’t know the story? I guess you need to come on a Rabbi Schwartz tour. But just imagine in America after the civil war of the North against the South, which the North won and got to keep their slaves. Imagine if the first president following that would be Barak Obama. It would be incomprehensible. It took almost 200 years until the racist laws were removed from the books and blacks could even sit next to whites on the bus. Yet, that’s the first King of Israel. The unlikely leader from the tribe of Binyamin that just lost the civil war. The next King, Dovid Ha’Melech, is even worse. A poor shepherd boy that hung out with the sheep all day. His own family pretty much left him behind. There were those that claimed he was a mamzer being born after his father separated from his wife. Others pointed out that his grandmother Rus wasn’t even really Jewish. His own father-in-law tried to take him out numerous times. And then of course you have all of those really bad scandals that one might arguably say makes Donald Trump look like Mother Theresa. There’s no way that Dovid Ha’Melech would’ve ever gotten into Brisk. And it’s highly doubtful his kids would be accepted in any school in Lakewood. Neither, for that matter, would that great anti-religious shepherd Rabbi Akiva who swore that he hated Rabbis so much that he wished he could bite them like a donkey (because a dog doesn’t break enough bones), and who ultimately passed the most draconian Chariedi draft laws in the history of Klal Yisrael, pulling his 24,000 Kollel Rabbis out of the Bais Midrash and forcing them to join that arrogant Israeli army of his student Bar Kochva to fight against the Romans and in which they were all ultimately killed. The Yerushalmi tells us that Rabbi Akiva himself took off his black hat and put on the green army uniform and was the Nosei Keilim- the bearer of arms/ general in that army. I wonder how many demonstrations there were against him in the streets of Jerusalem. And the list goes on and on and on. The origin stories of the greatest leaders of Klal Yisrael’s lives look more like a pathetic Hollywood makeover or critical Bible theory book perhaps,  than one of our Artscroll Gadol biography books. And Chazal as well don’t pull many punches in thus describing them. Although we do find throughout our sage two approaches in their descriptions, with some Rabbis trying to put shtreimels and black hats on all of our biblical great men and others knocking them down to the gutter. Yet both views (which are both obviously true- as paradoxical and mystical as it sounds) all come to the same conclusion. They were great. They were superhuman. They overcame challenges and most importantly they were one of the people and they were there for the people. Parshat Va’eira begins the story of our Exodus. We are told that when Mashiach comes our redemption from Egypt will pale in comparison to what we are hopefully very soon going to experience. Yet, before this whole story begins the Parsha begins with a pause and rude interruption that at first glance doesn’t seem to have much of a point. It’s information that we have all been given before. But even more perplexing is that the Torah really only tells us part of the story. Let’s recap the first chapter of the parsha in a nutshell. It begins with Hashem telling Moshe that He will take us out of Egypt with the four terminologies of redemption that we all know, as we drink the four cups of wine on Pesach each year to remind ourselves of them. It then stops and tells us that Moshe and Aharon speak to Bnai Yisrael as Hashem commanded them, which seemingly we know from last week. Parshat Shemot concluded with the Jews all being angry at Moshe and Aharon because of that, and Moshe complained to Hashem about putting him in this situation. Moshe tells Hashem that there’s no way Pharaoh will listen to him if he can’t even convince the Jews to listen to him. So why is the Torah telling us this again? The next verse is that Hashem is vayitzavem el Bnai Yisrael- he commands them to the children of Israel, which Rashi tells us is to be patient with them. And then to command them and Pharaoh to send the Bnai Yisrael out of Mitzrayim. And just when you thought this was all repetitive and boring enough. After-all we’re all itching to get to the fun part of the parsha with the staffs and snakes and plagues of blood, frogs, lice and wild animals, the Torah then stops and gives a yichus lesson of the lineage of the first three tribes. Reuvein and Shimon are called the “houses of their fathers” and tells us of their children. While for Levi, it gives us their children, their grandchildren, their great grandchildren their great-great-great grandchildren. It also tells us of Moshe’s mother Yocheved. Which fascinatingly enough it never told us any of this beforehand. If you remember back in Shemot, when it tells us about the birth of Moshe it only tells us that an anonymous man of Levi took a woman and had Moshe. It kind of conveniently left out the very messy fact that the woman that Amram, Moshe’s father, married and was Moshe’s mother was in fact his very incestuous older aunt. It seems Hashem left that out of Moshe’s yeshiva school application or shidduch resume. I wonder why. Yet here, davka at this point, it all comes out. Now it’s not only Moshe’s sketchy yichus that comes to the forefront here. It also drops some information about his brother Aharon’s as well. He has a grandson named Korach… Yeah that guy… As well his son Eliezer marries the daughter of Yisro, who was of course a goy that converted but before that was the chief idolator of his time. They have a kid who is a zealot named Pinchas and that lousy reputation of coming from an idolatrous grandfather follows him as well. These, the Torah concludes finally at the end of this dirty laundry list, are the heads of the house of Levi for their families. Finally this really strange chapter concludes with a very seemingly pointless and repetitively and grammatically awkward pasuk. “That’s Aharon and Moshe that Hashem spoke to about taking the Jewish people out of the land of Egypt… They are the ones’ that are speaking to Pharaoh the King of Mitzrayim to send the children of Israel out of Egypt. That is Moshe and Aharon. And it was on the day that Hashem spoke to Moshe in Egypt.” It’s only after that we read all this that the Torah goes back and tells us once again of Moshe’s complaint about Pharaoh. Yet this time if you look carefully his tune changes. The second time, Moshe’s only worry is that Pharaoh won’t listen to him because he’s got speaking problems. It’s got nothing to do anymore with the Children of Israel listening to him. Hashem tells him that it’s not going to be a problem. Aharon will interpret, all will be good. And then, by the way, this is how old Moshe and Aharon are. What’s going on here? What’s with this chapter? This interruption. This repetition. What is the Torah trying to tell us before we get to the big fun story of our redemption? The Shelah Ha’Kodesh, the Chizkuni and other commentaries all seem to suggest that this parsha is really a contrast to the parsha of Shemot in terms of our redemption. Until now Moshe is really an outsider. He has no connection as being part of the Jewish people. It really doesn’t even tell us who his parents are. He’s pulled out of a river. He’s raised like a goy. He only first goes out to them later in life. They turn onat him and call him a goy. He lives in Midyan for 60 years or so and marries some shiktza there, the daughter of a priest. Is it any wonder that he can’t fathom why the Jewish people won’t accept him? Even the tribe that he’s from, the tribe of Levi, isn’t really that hotsy tottsy. After-all they as well really weren’t part of the “people”. They were never enslaved. They weren’t “sharing the burden”. They were sitting in kollel all day, while everyone else wasn’t getting killed. How are they going to make this happen? How are these two going to bring the redemption?  Hu? Who? Aharon and Moshe… They’re both not nogaya- they are “him”. They’re not us. That’s where we left off on last week’s parsha. This week the Parsha called Va’Eira- Hashem shows us right in the beginning how He will show us. He shows us by commanding Aharon and Moshe unto Bnai Yisrael. The word doesn’t only mean I will command but it also means to connect. Hashem shows the Jewish people and us, how our redeemer, how Mashiach, will always come from the one that seems like he’s on the outside. That seems like he’s not from “unzereh” beis avos- father’s house and shtibel. but rather comes from quite the opposite; from rather precarious and messy roots. He might have an Egyptian accent, he might be the product of an incestuous relationship, he might be married to a colored shiktza from Midyan, or the daughter of the Pope of Egypt. But guess what? That’s Aharon and that’s Moshe. They’re Beit Avot. They’re the house of Levi. They’re the ones that you need to connect to and realize that your redemption will only come when you humble yourself enough to recognize that. It’s not just a lesson for Klal Yisrael and us. It’s a message and lesson for Moshe and Aharon. It’s not fun to be alienated and isolated and have your kids not accepted in their schools or red any shidduchim. You just want to throw up your hands, as Moshe does at the end of last week’s parsha and ask if it’s all really worth it. How and why would Pharaoh ever think that he should let the redemption of the Jewish people come and for Mashiach to reveal himself, if the Jews themselves can’t see the spark of Moshe in each of themselves? If they don’t believe in him, that he’s also part of them. That all of us have dirty laundry that perhaps we’ve buried in our father’s house that we’ve forgotten about. How can Mashiach come if we can’t see that even the most unlikely and most unlike us frum bessereh Jews also needs to be pulled out of a tunnel in Gaza. That unless he or she is saved, then we’re all not really in there together. That maybe that guy in the slave pit, or maybe that secular looking intermarried Jew is really not just one of us, but maybe even our redeemer that has a message from Hashem that perhaps we need to listen to. Thus the Torah pauses a moment before the redemption and connects us with this lesson. It’s the prerequisite to the plagues, to the wrath of Hashem falling upon Egypt and the miracles that will happen for our ancestors. The Torah tells us where Moshe and Aharon come from and then tells us that that’s really who Aharon and Moshe are. It is them that Hashem sent to Bnai Yisrael to take them out of Egypt. It is then them who can speak to Pharaoh. They are Moshe and Aharon. They are us. The sefarim note that it doesn’t tell us who Moshe’s children are in this recording, despite the fact that it tells us who Aharon’s are. Because we are all the children of Moshe. It is on “that day that Hashem spoke to Moshe”, the Klei Yakar tells us it tells us, because Moshe’s prophecy unlike all of the other prophets is by daytime. He’s the mouthpiece of Hashem. He speaks to him in Egypt. In the lowest place of the spiritual world. But it’s daytime for Moshe. And we are all connected to him.  From that verse on Moshe changes his tune. He has no doubt anymore about the Jewish people not believing in him in the rest of this process. He’s a beit Av. He as well is from our father’s house. It’s only his stutter that concerns him. Hashem tells him that he need not worry anymore. This is no longer about speaking skills. This is about revelation. It’s about connection. Moshe will speak, Aharon will speak. Pharaoh won’t listen anyways and the world will know that Hashem is one, his nation is one and the miracles and judgements will all take place. For we are all one down here, and thus the Oneness from above can reveal itself. What’s the message for us today? You tell me. Do we feel and relate to the children of Israel back then in Egypt? Can we not even imagine that Mashiach can come out of some secular Kibbutz? Do we believe that there are some Jews that probably don’t deserve to be redeemed? Do we feel that Mashiach can only be someone that looks like us? That he has to be someone that follows the takanon and rule book that my kids school or seminary will only allow you to be part of if he fits in that box. That Mashiach can only be someone who comes from a family that I would allow my child to marry and that I wouldn’t throw a shadchan down a flight of stairs for even suggesting. If we feel that way, then would probably have missed out on Shaul, we certainly would’ve never accepted Dovid Ha’Melech. We would neve have gone to the yeshiva or Rabbi Akiva and would probably still be in Mitrzayim waiting for a redeemer that had a black hat. It took us 210 years in Egypt to finally get the message. It took 86 years of severe persecution to finally just cry out and ask Hashem to send whoever and whatever it takes to redeem us. After 474 days of this war I’m ready. I want out. I want redemption. I don’t care what type of Kippa he’s wearing or if he even wears one at all. I want all of them home. I want all of you home. I want the ending that we have been promised and waiting for so long for. Va’eira- I want to be shown that glory. May this month of Shevat finally bring that awaited day. Have a blessed Chodesh Shevat and an amazing Shabbos! Rabbi Ephraim Schwartz  ************************ YIDDISH PROVERB OF THE WEEK   “A guter yid darf nit kain briv, a shlechten yidden helft nit kain briv” - A good Jew doesn’t need a letter of recommendation; for a bad one, it would do no good.   RABBI SCHWARTZ'S TOUR GUIDE EXAM QUESTION OF THE WEEK answer below at end of Email   5. Solomon’s Pools are located in the area marked in the Oslo Accords with the English letter ______ Which Order of Crusaders settled on the Temple Mount? A. The Templars B. The Hospitallers C. The Teutonics D. The Lazarists RABBI SCHWARTZ’S COOL VIDEO OF THE WEEK   https://soundcloud.com/ephraim-schwartz/vehi-shemada  -  Feeling a Little Pesach with the parsha this week here’s my Vehi She’amda which is amazing Dovid Lowy Arrangements  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lOa15INaXvI  – Eitan Katz Latest song Lulay Torascha Kinyan Masechta https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RcpdkRLU2Zc – Hayom Kamti Samayach Hanan Ben Ari Latest… https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=buiNbNUqB2g  – Yechadshau Dudi Kalish RABBI SCHWARTZ'S ERA’S AND THEIR PLACES AND PEOPLE IN ISRAEL OF THE WEEK Megiddo Armegeddon- 609 BC – It’s a problem when you’re too sure Mashiach is on his way sometimes. I’m trying to work on this concept. The downfall of and end of the glory period of Yoshiyahu concludes with this sad story that we recall each Tisha B’av with the Kinna that Yirmiyahu composed on this fallen righteous king. Yoshiyahu after this entire teshuva movement that he had kicked off was on a high. The Temple had been restored. The idolatry had been removed. There has never been an era like this since his great-zaidy King Shlomo. The people were united. And thus he felt that Eretz Yisrael was living in a Messianic time. Yet, he was wrong.   See, despite his best efforts, our sages tell us, the Jews really still were harboring hidden idolatry. It was fake new. They had TV sets behind their sefarim shanks and unfiltered internet that nobody knew about on their other smart phones that they hid away while they only used their Kosher ones in public. But Yoshiyahu that it was all good. And thus when Pharaoh Necho of Egypt decided that he wanted to travel through Israel to attack Bavel and help his ally in Syria/Ashur (or alternatively to attack Ashur- it seems that there’s some debate about this historically although the Navi seems to suggest the latter case). Yoshiyahu told him that he was not going to allow him to do that.   Now, Pharaoh is not someone that you say no to. Not back in Moshe’s day and not in Yoshiyahu’s days either. He however was very polite about it. He splained that he had no intention of invading Israel. It was really just to get across to the North that was the issue. Yet, Yoshiyahu told Pharaoh that the Torah tells us that when the Jews are doing the will of Hashem, “A sword will not pass through your land”. And so he wasn’t going to stand for it. They went out to fight meeting in Meggido, here in the North of Israel in the Jezree’el valley. A great Tanach site by the way.  The terrible tragic battle took place there where Yoshiyahu who stood at the forefront of his army himself was killed with 300 arrows that pierced him.   Yirmiyahu, who was a kohen, held his dying body and buried all the blood out of each wound and cried as his soul left him. It is at that moment that he composed the Kinnos we recite. It is a Kinnos that starts the destruction because its all downhill from here. Our sages tell us that Yoshiyahu who was buried in the city of David’s mistake was that he didn’t ask Yirmiyahu first about what he should do. Had he done so he would’ve realized that it’s not what Hashem wanted. It wasn’t time yet. The Messianic Euphoria wasn’t ready to be realized. It’s this lesson that I have to knock into myself as we sit here and wait for that day finally to come. May it be soon.   RABBI SCHWARTZ'S LINEAGE JOKES OF THE WEEK My bloodline has a history of stomach problems. Runs in the family.   What do you give a dog that graduates from university? A pedigree   I couldn't join the KKK, apparently my bloodline isn't pure enough. Turns out, my parents weren't even related.   Native American run deep in my bloodline. That’s why I can’t grow facial hair. I have Apache beard.   A potato had 3 daughters. When they were all grown up, the first one came to her father and said “daddy, daddy, I’m going to get married!” Father potato asked to whom? “To an Idaho potato!” Said the first daughter potato. Father potato said “Idaho potatoes are very hearty and good lineage. He will be a good provider for you, you have my blessing.” The second daughter went to her father and said, “daddy, daddy, I’m going to get married!” Father potato asked to whom? “To a sweet potato!” Said the second daughter. Father potato said “sweet potatoes are very loving and will care for you forever. He will be a good provider for you, you have my blessing.” The third daughter went to her father and said, “daddy, daddy, I’m going to get married!” Father potato asked to whom? “To Sean Hannity!” Said the third daughter. “Oh no!” Said the father potato, “he’s just a commentator!”   Fred came home from University in tears. "Mum, am I adopted?" "No of course not", replied his mother. Why would you think such a thing? Fred showed her his genealogy DNA test results. No match for any of his relatives, and strong matches for a family who lived the other side of the city. Perturbed, his mother called her husband. "Honey, Fred has done a DNA test, and... and... I don't know how to say this... he may not be our son." "Well, obviously!" he replied. "What do you mean?" "It was your idea in the first place" her husband continued. "You remember, that first night in hospital when the baby did nothing but scream and cry and scream and cry. On and on. And you asked me to change him." "I picked a good one I reckon. Ever so proud of Fred."   I wanted to find out more about my ancestors so I did a little digging and... ...got thrown out of the cemetery.   What do you call a protestor whose ancestors grew weed? A grass roots activist   If you find $60-80 to be too expensive for ancestry DNA kits, I have a cheap alternative...Announce that you won the lottery and you'll quickly find relatives you never knew you had!   An assistant to Donald Trump told him she had a fantastic dream last night. There was a huge parade I sent that ‘Ancestry’ site some information on my Family Tree. They sent me back a pack of Seeds, and suggested that I just start Over..   Took an ancestry test and found out I’m 50% Jewish. But I talked them down to 40.   What do you call someone with no German ancestry? Guten free.   The problem with Trump jokes: Republicans don't think they're funny, and Democrats don't think they're jokes *************************************** The answer to this week”s question is A – A fairly easy question. Solomon’s Pools which are named after Shlomo Ha”Melech as the pasuk tells us that he built pools for his wives near ein eitam and that is the general area. Yet the pools themselves are much more modern built by The Chashmonaim and Herod hundreds of years later. They served as the main source of water for the Temple Mount that Herod constructed. The area that it is in is Area A, which means that its under Palestinian Control and there are big red signs that say it would be dangerous to Israelis lives to enter there. Nice… The second question was even easier. Templars were called that because they watched over the temple. So that was fairly simple So I got them both right this week and the new score is Rabbi Schwartz 3.5 Ministry of Tourism 1.5 on this exam so far.

The Last "I"nitiative- Parshat Mikeitz Chanuka 2024

 

Insights and Inspiration

from the

Holy Land

from

Rabbi Ephraim Schwartz

"Your friend in Karmiel"

December 27^th 2024 -Volume 14 Issue 9 26^th of Kislev 5785

 

Parshat Mikeitz/ Chanuka

 

The Last “I”nitiative

 

I told him that I thought it was a bad idea. It was a stupid idea. And perhaps most of all I thought it was an evil idea. I think he was a bit taken aback. But, what did my well-meaning friend really expect when he called me to join him on what he thought was going to be a world-changing project? I was never really a yes-man, or Rabbi. Particularly when it comes to ideas that to me seemed to be taking off in the frum world. I’m a traditionalist, I guess. And I particularly get nervous when people come up with things that they believe others have to do for the miracles to come.

 

So to back up a bit, my friend and colleague called me a few weeks into the war with what he thought was going to be THE project that will save all of the hostages and win us the war. See, there was this story or video clip that was going viral all over the frum media of this woman that lived in Kfar Azza that I’m sure all of you have seen or at least heard of. It was a story of how the terrorists were coming to her house on October 7^th and she was hiding and cowering with her two children in fear. Something came over her at that moment and she turned to Hashem and prayed. She promised that if Hashem would save her and her children, that she would begin to observe Shabbos. Sure enough. As soon as she finished her short prayer from the depths of her heart, the terrorists turned around and left the direction of her house and she was spared. That’s the story. And I have no doubt that it’s true. She’s for real. It’s an amazing story.

 

As many know there certainly was an inordinate amount of shomer shabbat kibbutzim, settlements, cities, synagogues and yeshivos that were spared that Simchas Torah morning. There were some non-religious ones as well, but certainly most of the devastation took place in the non-religious areas. The ones that weren’t observing Shabbos. The ones that were perhaps even violating it by music festivals… Shabbos saves. Our rabbis tells us this. I believe that.

 

To be fair, as well, I also believe fundamentally, and it’s quite obvious, that our Rabbis have said that anyone that doesn’t have the benefit of a HEALTHY Jewish education and that was raised secular, has the same halachic status as a child that was kidnapped that at a very young age. Think that cute red-head baby Bibers. If God forbid we don’t bring him home…God forbid… He wouldn’t be responsible for not fulfilling mitzos. He doesn’t know. He didn’t learn. Neither did anyone that didn’t have a healthy Jewish education. It’s not their fault they don’t keep Shabbos or go to parties. They won’t even be punished for it. They’re an oneis. They had their heritage stolen from them. Yet, at the same time they don’t have the protection and beauty of Shabbos.

 

So this friend of mine called me up after he saw this video and he wanted to start this project. There were at the time assumed to be 251 hostages that were taken to Gaza. So what he wanted to do was start a project or movement, by which everyone would try to find 251 people that had never observed Shabbos before and they would undertake to keep Shabbos as a merit for one of the hostages to return. He thought that this would be an amazing idea. It would bring people closer together, make them more religious, it would connect us through Shabbos and of course it would bring back all of the hostages. He wanted my support. I wasn’t as excited as he was to put it mildly. But maybe that’s because I read this week’s parsha a little different than he did.

 

Parshat Mikeitz, which is always read Chanuka time, is a parsha that is very much about returning hostages. It’s about silly, stupid and bad, failed attempts. And it’s about understanding what really can bring them back. What we need to do to BRING THEM HOME. It’s 2024. Ba’yamim ha’heim ba’zman hazeh- in those days, but for our times. That’s what Chanuka is all about us realizing. About us revealing. It’s not ancient history. It’s us today.

 

The parsha picks up from last weeek with Yosef being held in some tunnel in Egypt. With no hope left. It’s Mikeitz. It’s the end. He thought the Butler would help him. He thought maybe he would get a pardon. But everyone else did except for him. Maybe he thought if Trump would get into office everything would be better. But he was wrong. 2 years passed and nothing changed. Keitz sam la’choshech- an end came to the darkness, our parsha begins Rashi tells us. The darkness was his faith that someone else could change his situation. After two years of waiting for it to be over, he realized there was no one else but Hashem that was gonna pull him out. Not Pharaoh. Not the Butler. Not Biden’s “Don’ts” Not Trump. Not Bibi. Just miracles. Just Chanuka. Yosef’s efforts are pointless and misguided. Stop looking to other people to solve your problems. There’s only One address one needs to turn to. We needs to turn within to ourselves. One needs to turn their eyes to Hashem.

 

Although Yosef was in prison for ten years. The parsha begins with the end of the two additional years that he sat there, waiting for his efforts and his hope and faith by turning to others besides Hashem to save him, to finally come to an end. Mikeitz, doesn’t only mean end or conclusion. It means li’hakitz- to wake up. Yosef needed to become “woke”. He needed to get out of the dreamland that deals, and exchanges, and diplomacy and anything besides Hashem will bring him home. When that ends. Yosef is redeemed. His new mantra is mi’baladei Hashem- there is nothing besides Hashem. No one else that can help Pharaoh, that can interpret dreams, that will save Egypt from the famine, that can return him to his brothers. It’s only Hashem.

 

The parsha continues with the brothers going down to get back Yosef. Shimon is taken hostage, by Yosef. There are demands and the conclusion of the parsha is about the possibility of Binyamin being taken hostage too. Yosef’s brothers implore Yakov to send Binyamin with them to get back their brother. To get food. To finally bring a cease fire. But Yaakov is wary. He doesn’t trust deals. He’s a bit older than his kids. He’s been betrayed again and again in his life. Esau backs out of his deal. Lavan as well. He knows that you can’t trust these people as far as you can throw them. He doesn’t want to lose Binyamin too.

 

There are two hostage negotiating teams that come to Yaakov. Two attempts to BRING THEM HOME. The first, Reuvein, fails. According to Rashi, Yaakov calls him a Bechor Shoteh-. It’s a stupid idea. What’s Reuvein’s approach. I’ll trade. If I don’t bring back Binyamin, I’ll give up my two sons instead. Yaakov is aghast. Really…? Reuvein, you just don’t get it. This story is not about trades. It’s not about your sons/my sons. The address you should be turning to is not looking at how you can manipulate or convince me by showing signs of faith, by making offerings of what other people or your even own children would or should give up. You’re missing the boat. You’re not looking within. You’re not taking personal responsibility. I’m not impressed.

 

Approach two is Yehudah. He doesn’t offer any trades. He merely says. I guarantee it. I’m responsible. I will do whatever it takes.

V’chatasi Lecha kol Ha’yamim- I have sinned to you all of my days.

 

No deals. No trade-offs. No putting it on someone else. It’s my sin. It’s all on me. That works. Yaakov bites. The redemption can come.

 

Yehuda, who perhaps had learned his lesson with the death of his own two children. Yehuda, who perhaps had learned what it means when he put the blame on Yosef, and as a result his own brothers put the blame on him. Who had almost obviated his own responsibility to his daughter-in-law Tamar, who fascinatingly enough as well was a hostage. An aguna, a trapped caged woman, unable to marry because of his own actions and sins. He had gone through his own process and understood that for the redemption and return of the hostages, he couldn’t put it anyone else’s shoulders besides his own.

 

Yosef, learns this lesson, Yehudah learns this lesson and finally as well, our parsha continues with the rest of the tribes learning this lesson as well. When they leave Yosef’s house, the Torah tells us that they stop off at an inn for the night and “The One”- who Rashi tells us is Levi (the one previously mentioned with Shimon) opened up his sack and finds the money they paid Yosef and that he had planted back there inside of it. He shows the rest of the brothers, whom, the Torah goes out of the way to tell us, don’t check their bags until much later after they get home. They have an interesting response to Levi

 

Va’yeitzei libam, va’yecherdu ish el echov ma zos asah Hashem lonu- And their hearts went out and they trembled- a man to his brother, what has Hashem wrought upon us.

 

Their hearts go out, and they tremble. But the Pardes Yosef notes, that they are not scared for themselves. They tremble for their brother. They’re nervous for Levi. The Yonasan Ben Uziel, adds even more poignantly that they ask what Hashem has wrought upon us, for they don’t feel that it’s their responsibility our sin. It’s Levi’s fault. It’s his sin. The way that they were processing this was placing the blame and responsibility, which is clearly coming from Hashem on someone else. It’s what they always did. What we always do…

 

 Yosef, was wrong. He was a snitch. A rodef- trying to be King. Yehuda’s at fault, they remove him from his position. Shimon is taken hostage. Well, that makes sense. He was the one that threw Yosef in the pit. It’s Hashem punishing him. Now Levi has the money in his bag. They tremble for their brother. But at the end of the day, it was him and Shimon that were in on this. The rest of us… We’re still good. We’re just following orders.  It’s not me that caused the hostages to be taken. It’s the guys not keeping Shabbos yet…

 

It was only after they come back home and empty their own bags that for the first time they don’t just tremble for their brother, but the Torah tells us Va’yirau- they feared. Or perhaps they saw. They understood. They’ve got stolen money in their own pekeleh as well. They have something that they have do teshuva on. Something that they have to return. It’s fascinating when they come back to Yosef, they change the story, they describe how they came to the inn and they all opened up their bags.

 

V’hinei kesef ish b’fi amtachto- and the money of a man was in his sack.

Kaspeinu b’mishkelo- our money in its weight.

 

It’s confusing. Is it one man who finds the money? Is it each man? Is it our money in its weight? Why change the story, when it seems that in reality they didn’t really find their own money until they came home, not there in the inn. Many of the commentaries wonder why and how they could lie like this. It seems a strange thing to make up.

 

But perhaps what they are saying is really the truth. This is their confession. We came to the inn. We all checked our bags. None of us found money except for Levi. We thought it was his fault. That we are guiltless. It’s his sin. But then we discovered that we were wrong. Kaspeinu b’mishkelo- our own money was also taken. We had our own sins. Our own mishkal- scales of guilt. Our own burden. We also made money off the sale of Yosef.

 

Va;neshev oto b’yadeinu- and we returned it to our own hands. Our own plates. Our own guilt.

 

There was a speaker that once came to my daughters Beis Yaakov school and spoke about the war. He took questions after the lecture and a girl raised her hands and asked why everyone was so busy helping out and getting things for the soldiers. Barbeques, doughnuts, Pizzas, raising money for them. In her holy spiritual Bais Yaakov world and innocence, the way she saw it was that the soldiers are really not doing anything here. They are just the external force of our battle. The real power is in our Torah. It’s the Kollel Rabbis and Yeshiva Bochrim learning. It’s the prayers. It’s the kabbalos and resolutions. That’s the real fighting force and artillery of the Jewish people. Why are we busy with soldiers so much?

 

My daughter, being my daughter,r was a bit upset by this line of questioning and asked me how I would respond. I told her that I would’ve told the girl that she is a hundred percent correct. The entire war is spiritual. Every bullet that hits its target, every tunnel we blow up, every Hamas guy we kill it’s all only because of the merit of Torah and our prayers and mitzvos. The soldiers, tanks and airforce are really not doing anything.

 

At the same time though, I asked her, why she is angry at Chamas? Chamas didn’t kill anyone. They didn’t burn, they didn’t pillage, they didn’t terrorize, they didn’t kidnap. That’s just Chitzoniyos. That’s just external. The real guilty party here is the Kollel guys. It’s the bitul torah. It’s the sinat chinam. It’s the machlokes and fighting in Satmer, in Gerrer, in Bobov, in Belz, in Ponivizh. It’s all the Jews in America that don’t move to Israel. It’s the talking during davening. Those are the real murderers. Those are the real terrorists. The blood is on their hands. On our hands. It’s my fault.The stolen money is in my bag… Chamas is just the external. Why are you angry at them? You can’t just take the credit and not the responsibility. Our Gedolim never did- as the Chafetz Chaim would repeatedly say that if there’s an earthquake in China it’s because someone is wasting time during seder in Radin… Or something like that… Certainly it’s even more true when something is happening in Israel…It’s not them. It’s not even the not-frum. They’re an oneis. They’re tinokos she’nishbu. They don’t know better. It’s us. It’s the Rabbis It’s the Chareidim- the ones who “fear Hashem”. It’s me…

 

But you are angry at Chamas it seems, little girl.  So, you do worry about the chitzoniyos. If that’s the case then you can buy a soldier a pizza, you can say thank you to them, you can at least say the prayer for their well-being.

 

Do you know why the project to get people to keep Shabbos to save a hostage is a bad idea? It’s because it’s putting the blame on someone else. It’s their chilul Shabbos that is preventing the return of the hostages. That’s the way they would hear it. How would you like it if I started a project and put up signs that 251 people from each chasidus should make peace with their dissenting break-off to save a hostage? Or that the two sides on the various yeshiva fights, the Bnai Brak and Jerusalem factions, the two Ponivizhes should make peace for a hostage. How long would that sign stay up on the bulletin board there in the hallway?

 

What if I said that 251 people should make Aliya to save a hostage. There was a great miracle story that someone promised to make aliya and he was saved. So how long would a sign like that stay on the wall in Lakewood? In Monsey. In the five towns. Maybe even in Teaneck? It wouldn’t last long. Because it’s not my sin… It’s Yehuda. It’s Yosef. It’s Shimon. It’s Levi…, I don’t have anything really bad in my pekeleh…

 

The parsha that we read on Chanuka is Mikeitz. It’s the holiday of the end. It’s the holiday of waking up. Of putting a wick in our menora. Ner Ish u’beiso. It’s in front of my own house. By my Mezuza that I have to light the candle. It’s the holiday of the miracle of finding me searching to find my own oil that I have to redeem. That I can uplift. That I can ignite.

 

We sing Maoz Tzur. We sing about the keitz bavel- the end of Iran. The keitz shivim- the end of the seventy years of exile when we realized that Bavel and Iran isn’t our home. That Zerubavel, that what we had thought that we could flourish outside of Eretz Yisrael was wrong and it was time to come home for the redemption. That the keitz is here.

 

Do you know what’s fascinating about this song? It’s first person. It’s me.

Maoz Tzur Yeshuosi- It’s my Rock of salvation

Tikon beis tefilasi- It’s my house of prayer

Az egmor b’shir mizmor- I will conclude with song.

 

Ra’os sava nafshi- my soul has been satiated with bad

B’yagon kochi kila- my strength is expired

 

Dvir kodsho haviani- I was brought to the Beis Hamikdash

V’higlani ki zarim avaditi- I was exiled, I served strangers.

 

It’s me me me me. Unlike most other songs and holidays that are “we” and plural Chanuka it’s about me. It’s my song. It’s my miracle. It’s my candle. It’s my hostage. It’s my redemption. But for that to happen we need to take the “I”-nitiative. It starts with I. With my own miracle. Karov keitz ha’yeshua- the awakening and end of the salvation is close. The beginning of the salvation has started. Iran and Bavel are falling. May by the end of Chanuka, perhaps even this Shabbos we merit for the return of the longest hostage. The Shechina, Hashem, back to His Home. Keitz sam la’choshech- there should be an end to the darkness. The bright new morning should begin.

 

Have a light-filled Shabbos and a happy Chanuka

Rabbi Ephraim Schwartz 

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YIDDISH PROVERB OF THE WEEK

 

“Shuldik iz der stolyer: ven er volt nit gemacht di bet, volt ich nit gekumen tsu keyn chet - It's the carpenter's fault: if he hadn't built the bed, I wouldn't have sinned.

 

RABBI SCHWARTZ'S TOUR GUIDE EXAM QUESTION OF THE WEEK

answer below at end of Email

 

NEW EXAM STARTS THIS WEEK!

 

1) At the start of the 21st century, Israel discovered reservoirs of _______________

near its shores.

 

What is reclaimed water?

A. Wastewater treated to enable reuse in agriculture and industry

B. Desalinated seawater to be used as drinking water

C. Water restored to natural areas which have dried up, such as the Hula Lake

D. Water artificially infused into salinated wells, mainly in the Arava region

 

 

RABBI SCHWARTZ’S COOL VIDEO OF THE WEEK

 

https://soundcloud.com/ephraim-schwartz/maoz-tzur   – In honor of Chanuka my latest song composition Maoz Tzur! Aren’t you ready for a new tune.. this one is great with Dovid Lowy doing my amazing arrangements and vocals!

 

https://soundcloud.com/ephraim-schwartz/haneiros-halalu  – And once you’re at it already why not use my fantazstically uplifting Haneiros Halalu tune for lighting your candles as well

 

 

https://soundcloud.com/ephraim-schwartz/al-hanissim  – And here’s my Al Ha’Nissim another amazing Lowy arrangement and vocals

 

https://soundcloud.com/ephraim-schwartz/chasof-zeroah  -  Finally my first Chanuka hit Chasof Zeroa arranged and sung by Yitz Berry!!

 

 

RABBI SCHWARTZ'S ERA’S AND THEIR PLACES AND PEOPLE IN ISRAEL OF THE WEEK

 

Old Bones- 621BC – Prophecies get fulfilled. Hashem just doesn’t work on our timelines. It’s Chanuka time. It’s time to go back to those days of the Beit Hamikdash and think about when it all went South. The First Temple built by Shlomo was only in use by all of the Jewish people for about 20 years or so. When he died Yeravam ben Nevat, Shlomo’s Rebbe breaks off and builds his own Temple. Two of them actually. One in Beit El and One in Tel Dan. Yup… Jews didn’t want to daven together. Back then Hashem sent a prophet to Yeravam to Beit El and told him that a day would come when not only would his kingdom be destroyed, but the very altar he was worshipping on would be used to burn the bones of all of the false priests and prophets by a future king named Yoshiyahu a descendant of Dovid. Guess what? It took 350 years, but we finally got here…

 

Now the prophet that came to Beit El with this prophecy and preformed signs from Hashem by freezing the hands of Yeravam and splitting the Altar and its ashes, was sworn by Hashem that he couldn’t eat anything in Beit El and needed to return home a different way then he came. Yet a false prophet met him along the way and wanted to discredit him so he convinced him that Hashem gave him a new prophecy that permitted it. The good prophet then joined him for his “last supper” and set off where he was killed by a lion. Ouch… Hope it was a good meal. The false prophet had regret and took the prophet’s body and buried him and admitted his guilt to his children and ordered that he be buried together with him. He figured that would save his bones from being burnt by Yoshiyahu later on. And sure enough that’s what happened.

 

Our chapter tells us how Yoshiyahu comes to do his job and sees this one grave that has trees growing all over it, different than all the other ones. He inquires after this and hears the story and spares these bones. Teshuva works. It helped this prophet. This is the final act of Yoshiyahu before the great rededication ceremony. The Pesach like no other one in our history. Stay tuned next week…

 

RABBI SCHWARTZ'S FUNNY INITIATIVE & CHANUKA JOKES OF THE WEEK

There is an initiative by the US government and the American Dairy Counsel that cheese needs to be sold only in block form. By doing this we could make America Grate Again.

 

My friends say I never take the initiative. I wish they'd just stop being my friends

 

A government run initiative to restore the male geese population is getting a lot of media attention...

Critics are referring to it as proper gander.

 

I was in a job interview.

"Can you give me a time where you've wrongly taken the initiative?"

"Hey, I'm the one that asks the questions here," came the reply.

 

A guy bought his wife a beautiful diamond ring for Hanukkah.After hearing about this extravagant gift, a friend of his says, “I thought she wanted one of those sporty four-wheel-drive vehicles.”

“She did,” he replies. “But where was I going to find a fake Jeep?

 

Who do penguins celebrate Hanukkah with? The Icebergs

 

I asked my dad if I could borrow 50 dollars to buy stuff for Hanukkah... He said "40 dollars? What do you need $30 dollars for?".

 

An old Jewish couple, Harry and Sadie, were married for 35 years but never got along...

...One day around this time of year, he says to her, "So? I suppose you'll be wanting a Hanukkah present?"

She says to him, "Harry, I want a divorce."

Harry says, "I wasn't planning on spending that much.

 What did the older Hanukkah candle say to the younger one? You’re too young to smoke.

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 The answer to this week”s question is A – Baruch Hashem new exam this week and off to a great start! This first question is easy, despite the lousy English translation of the second part. Obviously the answer to part A is Natural Gas! The Leviathan as its called. But being it’s Chanuka and this exam miraculously many times coincides with the times and parsha and Email you should have known that… Part B as well is pretty easy, although the better translation of mayim tehorim is purified or recycled water which is of course the waste water in this country that is recycled- by parasites that eat up all the poop in about two weeks and then it becomes clean drinking quality level water, although its only used for most of the agriculture in this country- thus we don’t really have water crisis anymore, unlike decades ago… So starting off this first exam with Rabbi Schwartz 1 and Ministry of Tourism 0. Not bad lets see if I can continue this streak!