The Unlikely King- Shavuot Edition / Parshat Naso- 5786 2026

 Insights and Inspiration

from the

Holy Land

from

Rabbi Ephraim Schwartz

"Your friend in Karmiel"

May 21^st 2026 -Volume 16 Issue 30 5^th of Sivan 5786

 

Parshat Naso - Shavuot

 The Unlikely King

 

(Amazing newest and latest Edition for you guys… After years of making me crazy… I'm delighted to share with you each week a PRINTABLE LINK! For the Dvar Torah or whatever you wanna call this portion of the Weekly E-Mail for your Shabbos table…

Thank you Amit Landau for putting this together for me…

CLICK HERE BELOW FOR PRINT EDITION

( weekly newsletter parshat naso Shavuot edition  )

 

They called him a "mamzer". That's not a nice name. Others called him a "goy". A "sheigetz". I don't know if there were any Yerushalmi kids there at the time, but they might have even called him a "Nazi". It was really a shame, they said. His father was such a holy special person. Some say that he never did an aveira his entire life. He was the gadol ha'dor. It's a really Shanda, that he has a kid like that. It's no wonder, that he really doesn't want to talk about him to much, and he just lets him wander around on those hilltops with his guitar all day, like those "lost boys". Those na'arei ha'gevaot that are just violent psychopaths in the making with their slingshots and stuff. At least they're taking out their aggression issues away from the rest of us normal people. He's a red-head, and you know what they say about "gingies". He's got that Esau blood running through him.  

 

He's so wild, did you hear? The army didn't even want him. All that crazy radical talk about wiping out all those uncircumcised goyim. Liberating the land, as if we aren't already living the geula for the past few hundred years. We have our Mishkan in Shilo. Our Beis Medrash and Torah in Bnai Brak and Ponivizh. Sure, we have to deal with those Philistines coming up from Gaza every couple of years and terrorizing us. But that's life in Israel. No one ever said it was going to be easy.  Anyways, we have a man in office that's dealing with that. We have an army. The most moral army in the world…

 

Somebody's got tell this kid to stop with his posts and whatsapp statuses. He's irresponsible. He's endangering all of us with his rhetoric. With his violence. With constant nagging for the Beis Ha'Mikdash. With those Mashiach patches and those Har Ha'Bayis signs he's putting up all over the place. Can't he see, that there's a reason why Hashem never revealed to us the place to build him that home, yet. We're not meant to go there. There's probably some grain yard, or some golden pimple there. When the time comes, Hashem will bring us all there. For the meantime, just hang out with your sheep. Because you're not accepted into any of our yeshivos. You don't fit into our system. You're a loser. A blight on our elitist Torah system and world. Even the Gadol Ha'Dor your own father knows that, and every day you're alive you’re a shame and Shanda on him and your entire family.

 

Little did anyone ever dream that this kid would become the King of Israel and the grandaddy of Mashiach. That he was the only one that really had it right the whole time. That his father, that gadol ha'dor was so wrong about him. He was wrong about himself, about his wife, about his bubby, about his own roots and insecurities that he projected onto him. That this youngest son of his, that everyone wrote off and were sure would never amount to anything, turned out to be greatest leader of the Jewish people.

 

He really was the only one, and the first in a few hundred years, that actually got right what we were supposed to be doing here in Israel- and no it wasn't just about setting up Torah, shuls, batei midrash or even planting and growing stuff. It wasn't to create an Israeli Defense Force either. We weren't brought here to live in self-created minimalist borders, and try not to upset our neighbors, or step on their feet, or graze on their land. Certainly not to destroy their places of forcing worship. Sure, Hashem gave us this mandate, but to be honest, despite what He told our ancestors, He's pretty happy with the Torah we're learning. When He's ready He'll come take care of it Himself. It's not really our job. We're just meant to sing 'Ani Ma'amin' until then. Vehi She'amda is nice too. Maybe the kid could write some songs. That could be a nice way of using his energy for good. It's such a shame what his father has to go through. Maybe we could be mekarev him…

 

I imagine, you guys have figured out that I'm talking about Dovid Ha'Melech. I imagine as well, that you know this is exactly the way they talked about him. The same way, that we talk about them today… 3000 years and absolutely nothings changed. The story with his father Yishai- whose tomb in chevron I visited yesterday, along with his great-bubby who he thought was shiktza; Rus, is a perhaps less famous one. It's worthwhile to know it, especially since that's one of the reasons we will be reading it tomorrow. The sefer, which really doesn't have much to do with Shavuos explicitly, is read on the yartzeit of Dovid Ha'Melech. Not just his Yartzeit, but his birthday too.

 

We read the book, because there was a question about Dovid's yichus. His grandmother was Moabite convert. The Torah says you can't marry or convert someone from Moav. They're bad people. They're selfish. They're promiscuous. They have bad middos. We don't want that bad blood mixing with our pure holy nation. Now there was a debate whether that was just the men from Moav or even the women as well. But, why take chances? Tachlis, a goy is a goy, and maybe they're good shidduchim for some ba'al teshuva or something or another convert. But certainly not for a nice haymisheh family like ours.

 

Particularly this Rus, girl, is a problem. Her father was Eglon. He was like Sinwar, like Arafat. He was the guy that lived in Jordan that made deals with Amalek and for 18 years persecuted and attacked Israel. Her grandfather was Balak that hired Bila'am and ultimately 24,000 Jews were killed in a plague after he sent his daughters out to seduce them. 24,000, non-incidentally, is the same number of the students of Rabbi Akiva that died during the period of Omer. The students that died for not giving kavod- honor to one another. They died for 32 days, according to some, which is the gematria of kavod. They died during the 49 days of Omer which the gematria of Moav. It ends on Shavuos, with this granddaughter of Moav's story. It ends on Shavuos with the story of the birthday of the boy, who's their descendant who didn't seem to get too much respect himself; Dovid Melech Yisrael chai v'kayam.

 

Yishai, Dovid's father, although he never knew or even acknowledged that until the end of his life, had even separated from Dovid's mother in order to try to "purify" his questionable lineage. To get rid of this persistent skeleton in his closet, of this great-bubby of his that a few hundred years later people were still talking about. We have a way of doing that. He separated and married a maid servant, with plans of freeing her and thus she would become a regular convert and the line would be purified. Yet Dovid's mother wasn't a big fan of the concept. She wasn't such a lamdan, like her gadol ha'dor husband. So much like great-bubby Rus she took matters into her own hands. She snuck in the middle of the night, and poof Dovid came out of that conception, that Yishai didn't even know was from him. He assumed, Dovid's mother was with someone else during that separation period. Dovid was a mamzer. A goy perhaps. Nisht fun unzereh…So he chucked him out.

 

It wasn't until Shmuel comes to anoint one of his children to be the King of Israel, that he surprisingly finds out that none of his yeshivish brisker kids were worthy, and neither were the ones that were faithfully serving in the army of Shaul, that seemed so much more politically correct and leadership worthy. It was the kid with the sheep and guitar on the hilltop that was the anointed of Hashem. It was the kid they threw out of all of the yeshivas. It was the one fighting with animals. It was the kid we wrote off…and said wasn't real ours. That has bad blood. That was the chosen of Hashem. It's from him that not only does Mashiach descend from, but for whom, Rashi tells us in this week's parsha the Bais Ha'Mikdash is even named after. He's the red-headed leader, that doesn't have just a new "Trump" wing or hotel of the White House named after him, but the entire house of Hashem, then and what we daven for is called The Bais Dovid. David's house.

 

The Alshich, the Shela, the Ramachal and many other Jewish sages throughout the generations all note the bizarreness of the origin story of Dovid and Mashiach. The truth is it's even worse than what I've even written. For Moav's early roots come from the daughter of Lot's incestuous relationship with their father. Boaz is a descendant of Yehuda and Tamar and their illicit harlot's tryst unknowingly with his own daughter-in-law. It's not nice stuff. It's skeletons in our closet. It's people that we talk about perhaps at best, treating with kavod, and respect and being mekarev, but l'maaseh never really dream that they can be Mashiach, they can be greater than all of us. That they should marry into our family, let alone lead it.

 

Yet, that's not only the real secret of Mashiach, that seems incomprehensible to us, they suggest. Rather it's the only way that he can ever be born and ultimately reveal himself. What they write is that there is a real power of the Satan, to prevent and prosecute the coming of Mashiach and the revelation of Hashem. That's the job Hashem created him for. To create a counter-force in the world that will grant us free-choice and always balance out holiness and revelation with a significant force and challenge that will try to hide and destroy that. It's why every Yom Kippur we have to give a goat to Azazel as a gift to distract him. To pretend as if we're worshipping idolatry so he'll be quiet and let our atonement fly. It's why on the day of giving of the Torah, Hashem distracted the Satan to the point that the Midrash tell us that when the Satan came home he didn't even know it was given and therefore immediately upped the ante with the sin of the golden calf temptation, by floating the coffin of Moshe. He does that after the Akeida, with the death of Sarah. And particularly when we get closer and closer to Eretz Yisrael and fulfilling our divine mandate, he's there with Amalek, with Balak and Bilaam, with the spies. He doesn't stop.

 

The Satan's job didn't end even when we came into Israel. He made us satisfied with settling parts of the land and getting too lazy to take the whole thing. He made us happy with Shilo and we forgot about the house of Hashem. He does this after the building of the Temple with the division of our kingdom. With the Jews not wanting to return during the 2^nd Temple with Ezra. With the sins of the 2^nd Temple. The Greek influence. Assimilation. Political correctness. Sinas Chinam. He's done it through out our Galus. He's still doing it today. He's smart. He's savvy and there's only one way to overcome him and bring in the light. It's through the back door. It's with people that he doesn't see as a threat. It's from the darkest shmutziest stories, that he knows we will never believe in or find light in. That's the only way Mashiach could be born. Happy Birthday Dovid.

 

The Eim Ha'Banim Samaycha, Rav Teichtel, writes during is time during the Holocaust, about the secular and perhaps even anti-religious underpinnings of the Zionist State. Although initially having been an anti-zionist before the Holocaust who decried this movement, his thinking shifted and he quotes source after source throughout Chazal that the opposite is quite true. It is only through these non-frum, through the sins just like Dovid's and Mashiach's illicit promiscuous origins that the redemption can come. That we can get past the Satan's spiritual camera, that he has on his phone that's always on the lookout for of happening. Mashiach can only be revealed, through a hiddenness that looks prust, and filthy to us, that you don't even want to tell your children what's going on. It's coming from people that we may call eruv rav, but the truth is they're our ticket home. There's a spark in them, just like Dovid that is willing to sacrifice it all for the house of Hashem, that Rashi tell us

"because he sacrificed himself for the house of Hashem, it is called on his name"

Just as the Mishkan is called after the name of Moshe.

 

I spend a lot of times on the hilltops with my tourists. I love this 15 year old kids and simple families that are fighting and doing it all with their sheep, to conquer the land. To chase out our enemies. To fight against our own Israeli army and beauracacy because they long for our return home. What's fascinating though is that these same kids with payos, tzitzis and sandals who I see as modern day Dovid Ha'Melechs and are perhaps some of the most vilified in Israel and in the world, were here a hundred years ago as well. They were secular back then. They were chalutzim, pioneers without kippas and many even ate on Yom Kippur and denied Hashem. Yet they sat the ground for what these holy ones are doing today. They got us past the Satan. And now we're slowly sancitifying their work.

 

Interestingly enough, the same is true in our army. The original army of Israel was all about kochi v'otzem yadi, Our own power, our own greatness. Yisrael Bitach Ba'Tzahal. The Satan had no problem with them. He was even willing and allowed miracles to take place. Even ask the Satmar Rebbi and Neturei Karta… They were the harlot at the crossroad of Yehuda, they were daughters of Moabite sinners, they were Lot's daughters who thought they with their own sins can save the world and create a new one. Yet, they held and were hiding the light of Mashiach. The light of Dovid. Toady look at the army of Israel. They're mostly wearing Tzitzis, yarmulkas, they sing songs about Hashem. They all daven. They learn. They believe. They're on fire and have Mashiach patches on their uniforms. We got through the door of the Satan. We've avoided his camera. We now need to finish the job.

 

Parshat Naso, that we read this Shabbos here in Israel, is all about that idea. It's the counting of Levi and then it’s the ones thrown out of the camp and bringing them back, the tamey, the zav, the metzora, the sota and even the holier-than thou- nazir. Only after we return them, only after we see the blessing of the Kohen for them, can the nesi'im then each bring their sacrifices. Because they are our key to bringing mashiach. They've got the visa that can get us into the country. They possess the holy spark that we need to find the chen the Kohen blesses us with in order to bring Shalom, to the world. To build an eternal house of Shalom.  

 

The holiday of Shavuos, is really not so much about the Torah. The Torah is our kesuva- our marriage document, with Hashem. Can you imagine someone by their wedding dancing and running around and showing them their kesuva all night. Check it out, what an amazing document. What s brilliant idea. What beautiful writing! Meanwhile the kallah is sitting in the corner wondering when her chasan will remember that she's there waiting. She wants to go into the yichud room. She wants him to bring her home. Shavuos is about being one with Hashem. It's about a house of Dovid.

Dovid is the same letters as dod- my beloved. That's what we need to remember. That's the ball we need to keep our eye on. If we do that, then we would be more focused on the ones that we need to be there with us, the ones that can perhaps be our key to getting there. The one's we're overlooking because we're so focused on the kesuva and not the house. Dovid, never forgot the house. On Shavuos, we read his story to remind us and tap into his energy so we can redirect our thoughts and perhaps undergo that one last paradigm shift that we need, so that we may once again merit to see our King and bring Him back down to His palace.      

 

 Have a revelatory and celebratory Chag Shavuos Samayach and an uplifting Shabbos

Rabbi Ephraim Schwartz 

 

This week's Insights and Inspiration is sponsored by my dear friend Shel Donner in honor of their upcoming trip to Israel in honor of his granddaughters Ruthies 10^th Birthday!

Mazel Tov.. It's so great to have you back here, and there's no better way to celebrate a birthday like a trip to Israel. May Ruthie continue to grow into a beautiful bas Yisrael and be a source of much yiddishe nachaas to her entire family and her grandparents that love her very much!

  

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YIDDISH PROVERB OF THE WEEK

 

"Fun krume shidukhim kumen arois glaikheh kinder."– From crooked matches also come straight children..

 

RABBI SCHWARTZ'S TOUR GUIDE EXAM QUESTION OF THE WEEK

answer below at end of Email

 

33. In honor of which ruler’s visit was the road from Jaffa to Jerusalem paved? ________

 What is the earliest text in which the city of Jerusalem is mentioned?

A. The Torah

B. The New Testament

C. The Execration texts 

D. The Dead Sea Scrolls

RABBI SCHWARTZ'S COOL VIDEO OF THE WEEK

 

In Honor of Shavuous it's Rabbi Schwartz compositions playlist!

 

https://soundcloud.com/ephraim-schwartz/dovid-melech-r-ephrayim  - In honor of Dovid Ha'Melech's Yartzeit my Dovid Melech song that we should be zochen to sing soon to greet Mashiach!

https://soundcloud.com/ephraim-schwartz/vatem   – Dreaming of the Geula? Here's my wings of Eagle composition with the promise Hashem gave us on Shavuot! Dovid Lowy on the arrangements and vocals!

https://soundcloud.com/ephraim-schwartz/kad-yasvun  - This beautiful heartfelt composition of mine Kad Yasvun… When we are joyous in our study of the Torah Hashem tells the malachim to look at his beautiful children who forget their own tzaros to only take joy in Hashem… Dovid Lowy again on vocals and arrangements…

https://soundcloud.com/ephraim-schwartz/melech-rachamon  - From our holiday davening our longing and prayer for Hashem to rebuild the Bais Ha'Mikdash- You even get to hear me sing the first 20 seconds or so… Baruch Hashem Dovid takes over from there…

https://soundcloud.com/ephraim-schwartz/torah-hakedosha  – Our Tefilla to the Torah to turn to Hahem and not forget that Shavuos Morning when we first wed Him and said "I do" and to answer our prayers…

https://soundcloud.com/ephraim-schwartz/eitz-chayim  – And finally my song for Shavuous Eitz Chayim Hi- It's our tree of life. It's ways are pleasantness… And the song is great!

RABBI SCHWARTZ'S ERA’S AND THEIR PLACES AND PEOPLE IN ISRAEL OF THE WEEK

Prophecy Ending- 350 BC-   The return to Eretz Yisrael was happening. As per the nevuah of Chaggai the Jews started rebuilding the temple. The process that had started 19 year before hand with Koresh/Cyrus that had been halted now commenced once again with the return of Zerubavel and the permission of Darius. Yet, not everyone came, as we noted. Most stayed. The Navi Zecharia steps into the limelight here and rebukes them. He tells them that era of prophecy in coming to an end. There's really no point in it anymore he tells them. For a few reasons.

 

The first is that nobody really is paying attention and coming. So why talk and reveal and try to cajole if the words aren't being heeded to return. The second reason though he gives, is even more powerful. He tells them that they are experiencing more prophecy now than before. Because the words of the prophets of the past are actually taking place before their eyes. Why can't they see it? Why don't they not how miraculous it is that we are returning. That we are building. Why are they still there? Finally, he tells them that the reason prophecy is ending is because Hashem is angry. He's hiding His face from us. We've refused to come home to see Him and to bring Him home. He will not hang out and communicate with us as well as He did in the past. He is our shadow. He's taking His cues from us.

 

For 19 years we had been in Jerusalem and even starting to sacrifice offerings on the altar we constructed there, despite there not being a Temple. Now that the process had begun of rebuilding it, the Jews started getting a bit frummer and asking about purity and impurity laws. Who can come and who can't. Zecharia again tells them an unbelievable and tragic and prophecy. He tells them that tumah and tahara isn't as important as the actual building and return to the service. The 2^nd Temple will not be the final one. The Jews have rejected it by not coming. It will last, we will worship there. Yet, the shechina and miracles can't come until the next Temple that will follow. Then we can fix our sins. Then we can come back for good. That's the era we're in now.

 

Take that thought in your minds as you daven this Shavous, wherever you are but especially in chutz la'aretz. We want the real deal. We want to come home and build the Bais Ha'Mikdash. Totty is waiting for us…

 

RABBI SCHWARTZ’S TERRIBLE KING JOKES OF THE WEEK

 

There once was a king who was 12 inches tall.He was a terrible king but a great ruler…

 

A king has 3 cups in front of him. The first 2 cups are full, the third cup is empty. What is the King's name? King Philip III

 

What happens when the King leaves the toilet? A Royal Flush.

 

Once upon a time, a King wanted to have some fun. He went on a podium and said loudly: "I will give half of my fortune to anyone who manages to tell me a lie that I, myself, admit that it's a lie."

An old man walked to the King and said: "I can draw rainbows wherever I want."

The King replied: "That's true, I saw you making one yesterday and it was really pretty."

A soldier then walked to the King while everyone stared at him, and said: "Your majesty, I have a gun that shoots atomic bombs."

The King quickly said: "That's great, and by the way, good job on Hiroshima."

After hearing all that, the kingdom was discouraged to ask any further questions because it would simply end the same; the King can always find a way to dodge that lie.

Almost desperate, a young Jewish boy named Bereleh, approached the King holding a barrel and loudly said: "I lent you a barrel of gold last week".

The King said: "That's a lie."

The boy replied: "Give me half of your fortune then!"

The King quickly said: "Wait, I remember, you did lend you me barrel of gold last week."

Smirking, Bereleh shouted: "Give it back to me then."

 

What's it called when a King and Queen have no children? A receding heir-line.

 

Which of King Arthur's knights was chosen to make the round table? Sir Cumference

 

Why did none of the women King Midas dated want to marry him? They got gold feet.

 

A king had 10 wild dogs. He used them to torture and kill any minister that misguided him.

A minister once gave an opinion which was wrong and which the king didn’t like at all, so he ordered that the minister to be thrown to the dogs.

The minister said,

"I served you loyally 10 years and you do this..?

The king was unrelenting. The Minister pleaded

"Please give me 10 days before you throw me to the dogs"

The king agreed. In those 10 days the minister went to the keeper of the dogs and told him he wanted to serve the dogs for the next 10 days. The guard was baffled, but he agreed. So the minister started feeding the dogs, caring for them, washing them, providing all sorts of comfort for them. So when the 10 days were up, the king ordered that the minister be thrown to the dogs as sentenced. When he was thrown in, everyone was amazed at what they saw. The dogs were wagging their tails playing with the condemned minister and licking his feet. The king was baffled at what he saw.

"what happened to the dogs? !!!” He growled.

The minister then said;”

I served the dogs for only 10 days and they didn’t forget my service…

Yet I served you for 10 years and you forgot all at the first mistake!”…

The king realised his mistake and replaced the dogs with crocodiles !!

 

My friend is such a big fan of the Royal Family, each of his four sons are named after a king.

**Henry**

**George**

**Charles**

**Burger.**

 

There's a depressed king back in the 14th century. And nothing could cheer him up. Eventually the royal advisor hired a new fool to entertain the king. The clown was very funny, and most of the court laughed, but the king merely sighed, and then turned towards his advisor.

"I don't think this worked Henry, but I appreciate the jester."

 

King Henry VIII had six wives. He beheaded two of them. Those were his axe wives.

 

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The answer to this week's question is C– OK I always marvel how this sometimes connect to the time of year that this falls out. It's a divine kiss to those that make it this far into my column 😊. Now the first part I got right officially, the second part only spiritually. Franz Josef I knew. His visit to Israel was famous, and its why we have the Tifferet Yisrael shul currently being rebuilt's dome in honor of his hat and visit. Part II I got wrong according to them. I of course went with the Torah. The answer they were looking for was the excrecation scrolls which were found in Egypt from about 1000 years supposedly before the Jews were even in Egypt. They mention Jerusalem. So technically the pre-date the Torah. But as we know it all starts with the Torah, which was my guess…

So I got this one only half right. and the new score is Rabbi Schwartz having 22.5 points and the MOT having 10.5 points on this latest Ministry of Tourism exam.

A Spin on Dreidel- Parshat Vayeishev/ Chanukah I

 Insights and Inspiration

from the

Holy Land

from

Rabbi Ephraim Schwartz

"Your friend in Karmiel"

November 27^th 2021 -Volume 11 Issue 9 22^nd Kislev 5782

 

Parshat Vayeishev

 

A Spin on Dreidel

It's an ancient tradition that we try to observe. We light our menoras, we have Chanukah parties, we sing holiday songs, and even compose a few and of course we eat latkas and being in Israel jelly doughnuts. And there is of course dreidel. Now perhaps when we were kids this custom was fun as we sat around spun our sevivon / top and counted out pennies from the pot. The tradition has that it began when the Greeks forbade us from learning Torah, the Jews would secretly study and when the Greeks would come in they would hide their books and pretend to be playing dreidel. Although that may be the source, it seems that the custom to play is only a few hundred years old or so. But that's good enough for me.

Now pennies or even shekels and spinning tops were just not going to cut it for my chevra in yeshiva. It was too childish and no fun or challenge. So it seems the yeshiva world- although some of our Rebbeim would probably protest at us hijacking that distinguished title, came up with other alternatives to fulfill the concept. The dreidel became a deck of cards and the game was given some name that had some chassidic spiritual mystical element to it; Kvittlach. In reality I believe that it's just yeshivisheh blackjack. Poker, with some herring thrown in for good measure. It involved some money changing hands. But everyone knows that Chanukah gelt is a mitzva, right? I guess the only connection that it had with the original custom was that when the Rebbeim would walk in they would hide the cards and money and pull out a sefer and pretend to be studying. So it's almost like the real thing.

I personally was never a gambler. Probably because any gelt that I did have I used to buy sufganiyot and shwarmas. I tried learning the kvittlach game once but it was beyond me. I still have no clue what an elevaroon is. Maybe an elevated macaroon? Instead I went to visit my good friend in more of a "fun" yeshiva. Those were "my 'other' boys". My yeshiva was where I would learn. Theirs was where I would go when I needed to get away for a bit.

 It was late at night, after seder of course, when I arrived there. My buddy Yanky was sitting down with some of my friends discussing the Chanukah night activity for the evening. These were not kvittlach people. The typical card games were too lame. One of them finally came up with a great idea. Monopoly! Now I was a big board game person. Risk, Stratego, chess, games that required using our yeshivish noggin and beating someone else with our incredible strategies. Conquering the world, killing kings capturing flags. We were good at that. Monopoly is a luck and throw of the dice game. What's the kuntz?

The boys smiled at me and pulled out the game. They replaced the monopoly bills right away with shekels. Now I know that shekels are painted to look like monopoly money. I tell my tourists so that it's that they shouldn't confuse it with real money. Otherwise your typical American could get sticker shock hearing repeatedly that it's 100's of shekel for this and for that. But once you realize it's not real money, it's only shekels then it's not so bad.

But this was different. Monopoly with real money, albeit shekels is a totally different game. Do I buy this? Do I build? All of a sudden these question have real financial consequences! Hmmm. It sounded interesting. Not having any money, I sat down to watch (Ok maybe I chucked in a few shekels…Shhh…). The game became more and more intense as the night wore on. The trading got heavy, the arguments and under the table deals were heating up. And all of a sudden…Boom, the door opened.

 In front of us stood Rabbi G., the Rosh yeshiva. Now this was not my yeshiva. I wasn't too worried. But, it was still scary watching his face as he took in the scene before his eyes. He looked at Yanky with a stern glare and asked him what was going on. Without batting an eye Yanky turned to his Rosh Yeshiva and told his Rebbe,

"Can you believe this? He wants me to trade him Pacifc and Atlantic for Mediterranean and Park Place., what does Rebbe have to say about that?"

I will never forget Rabbi G.'s expression and response. He looked at Yanky. He understood his boys. He knew when to fight 'em, when to hold 'em and when to fold 'em.

"What!" Rabbi G. said, "Mediterranean?! Even Kollel guys don't live on Mediterranean…!" and with that he walked out and left as if he didn't see a thing.

Oy…. Those were the days. I think Yanky got his schmooze on the evils of gambling the next day, but in my opinion the wisdom, self-control and wit of that Rebbe, taught me an even more important lesson. One has to see the big picture of connecting with your students over losing it all over a game of monopoly. It's a lesson I will never forget.

It's Chanuka this week, My Chanuka box is out with all my Chanukah paraphernalia. Menora, silver polish, candles wicks, oils, and Happy Hanukah signs and of course dreidels. What is the deeper concept behind this dreidel? Now we know that there are four letters Nun Gimmel, Shin and Hey or Pey, which stand for Neis Gadol Haya Sham - A great miracle happened there or alternatively Po-here. The difference of course is depending on if you are playing in Israel or the Diaspora. Although I understand that Satmar and some other-shall we call them "not-pro-Zionist" of our brethren-don't use the "peh-here" ones even in Israel either. They claim it’s a Zionist invention. Although a gambling game of spin-the Jewish-top would seem like a lame place to start declaring religious indignation about foreign secular influences. But hey... I would never crash anyone's fun or party as Rabbi G taught me.



But the truth is that there is something sacred about the dreidel spinning game. There were great Rabbis like the students of the Baal Shem Tov, the Chasam Sofer, and I've been told that even (lbl'ch) Reb Chaim Kanievsky has mentioned that his father the Steipler played dreidel with them as children. It's fascinating that when they went through the concentration camps storehouses where they Nazi's kept the items they confiscated from the Jews many dreidels were found. It seems that the Jews who were limited by what they could bring with them to these camps, somehow felt the dreidel was something to bring. One can imagine the clandestine games in their barracks late at night. They may not have been able to light a menora, but at least they had something to remind them of the miracles of old and to give them faith that it could happen again.

There are many different insights about the dreidel game. The Bnai Yissachar sees it as the difference between Chanuka and Purim. Whereas on Purim we spin the gragger from bottom, Chanuka the dreidel is pun from the top (excuse the spun…oyyy). On Chanuka the miracle came openly from Hashem. It was clear that He was running the show. The Jews did not merit redemption or the miracle as most of them had assimilated. Hashem had to spin that dreidel from above. On Purim we fasted, we prayed and we repented. We were the ones turning that Divine grogger. We made the noise and Hashem in kind responded.

Rebbi Nachman of Breslav has an incredible insight into the dreidel game though. He notes that the dreidel is like life. We spin and we spin and we fall. Sometimes when we fall we are gadol- we are great we win. Other times we are Nun- nisht nothing. Sometimes we pay, sometimes we lose half, but yet we pick ourselves up and spin again. Sometimes it's our turn and the next spin it could be my neighbors and other game players turn. Life is constantly spinning and we are constantly waiting to see where it will fall. Some spins are longer and some are shorter. The one thing that unites all of the players though, is when the top is turning you can't see the letters. When it is spinning around and around they all look like one. That is the message we are meant to internalize about our lives. We are all on a dreidel and we are all part of the miracle. Today's shin could be tommorow's gimmel.

The parsha that we read this week before Chanuka Vayeishev (and you thought I'd forgotten about this part of the E-Mail…shame) is also like a dreidel and completes this message. The Rokayach notes that almost every single verse in the parsha begins with the letter vav, which translates as "and". And this… and that… and this… and he came… and he settled …and he went… It’s a parsha on the move. It's a parsha that is constantly spinning. The vav is like that little handle on the top of the dreidel that Hashem is spinning. Yosef is the favorite child. He got a colored coat. He got the first gimmel. But then he is thrown down in a pit. He falls. Shin. Yaakov is settled and happy. Gimmel. He falls in mourning for his kidnapped son. Shin Reuvein is the oldest, and he loses his position, Yehuda is the leader and he falls. Tamar is on the bottom and then she rises up. They all ultimately rise again. It's one continuation. They're all spinning. It's ironic that the parsha is called Vayeishev- and he settled because no one seems settled after the first verse. But the Torah is not ironic. It is settled like our dreidel. It falls, but then rises and spins again.

Do you know how many verses don’t start with vav in the parsha? Eight. Yup. Eight days of Chanuka. Interestingly enough there is another book that also has every verse besides eight that start with the connecting letter vav that unites it all together; that is spinning the entire story. It is the book of Ruth. There as well, people are rising and falling. Elimelech, and his two sons are the leaders and they flee Israel and ultimately intermarry and die. Naomi who was once the big Rebbetzin comes back as a pauper. Rus is a former princess and she now is begging for wheat and charity. It's an amazing story. But the end of that story is the birth of the grandfather of King David; the beginning of the messianic line.

That messianic line of King David had its start in our parsha. The beginning of the driedel game started already centuries before with Yehuda and Tamar the ancestors of Boaz. The great miracle is happening here. Do you know what the gematria of Nun Gimmel Shin and Hey is? 358. Do you know what else has that same gematria? Mashiach.

The top is spinning. This Sunday night we will light our menoras. We will sing Maoz Tzur. It's a song about all of our exiles. We start with Egypt, we go through Bavel, Chanuka and Purim. We conclude with the final exile that we are still in and ask Hashem to bring Mashiach. Then we pull out our dreidel and watch it spin in the glow of those candles. May the dreidel of Klal Yisrael finally land on that winning letter. We want the gantzeh pot. It's time for the Nes Gadol.

Have a winning Shabbos and a Happy Chanuka

Rabbi Ephraim Schwartz

 

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RABBI SCHWARTZ’S FAVORITE YIDDISH PROVERB OF THE WEEK

 

" “Ainem’s mazel iz an anderen’s shlemazel."– One’s good luck is another’s misfortune.."

 

RABBI SCHWARTZ'S TOUR GUIDE EXAM QUESTION OF THE WEEK

answer below at end of Email

 

4) According to the resolution for the partition of the Land of Israel, Nahariya was to be in the territory of the _____ State.

The partition proposal was put to a vote at the UN following the recommendation of:

a) The Jewish Agency (ha’sochnut ha’yehudit)

b) The Arab Higher Committee

c) UNSCOP

d) Recommendation of the great powers - the Soviet Union and the USA

 

RABBI SCHWARTZ’S COOL VIDEO OF THE WEEK

https://soundcloud.com/ephraim-schwartz/al-hanissim   – Chanukah is coming time to enjoy your favorite Rabbi Schwartzes Chanuka compositions here's my Al Hanissim

 

https://soundcloud.com/ephraim-schwartz/haneiros-halalu- And of course my haneiros halalu… we'save the chasof for next week.

https://youtu.be/NinkEVhCmc4 - Nissim Blacks latest song and video "Change" the man is mamash the holiest rap star I know

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jiskf_lZXv8   – Tis the season once again traditional Chanukah acapella musical knockoffs songs this is West Side Story by Six13

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Kd_vS0IINIE  - "Illuminating" by Maccabeats

  

RABBI SCHWARTZ'S PARSHA/SHABBOS CONNECTION OF THE WEEK

 

The Super Power of the day- Parshat Vayeishev- This week's Torah portion introduces us to Yosef and all the ordeals and challenges that he went through, the pinnacle of which our sages tell us is that "test" that he had in avoiding the temptation and seduction of the wife of his master Potifar. The Medrash tells us that Yosef has told Hashem, that his father Yaakov underwent challenges and tests as did Avraham and he seemed to be having an easy life. As a result Hashem responded that he would give him an even greater challenge than they ever went through and thus the story begins. Lesson one. Be careful what you ask for in life.

 

What made the challenges of our ancestors so difficult the sefarim tell us is that Hashem to a large degree upped the ante of their Yetzer Harah to the point it where it really was almost unhumanly possible to resist. For example by Avraham when Hashem told him to take his child whom he loved for a sacrifice, Hashem increased Avraham's love for Yitzchak so much it was almost impossible to go through with the command. Similarly when Yosef was being seduced again and again and again by this woman, Hashem removed all his natural inhibitions and increased his desire to such a degree that it was too difficult to pass up.

 

How then did Yosef survive? So the Divrei Shmuel suggests that the Torah reveals this to us by telling us when this happened. It says Vayehi ka'hayom ha'zeh- and it was like this day, when the final temptation took place. The Midrash there says, what day was it? You guessed it/ None other than Shabbos Kodesh. Why is this so significant? Because on Shabbos, he tells us, a Jew is given extra super spiritual powers to lift themselves up from the bottom and rise to places that one could never reach during the regular weekdays. Shabbos, is when the entire world is elevated. We can make even the mundane holy and special. How? Because Shabbos possesses that super-power and energy into a Jew that connects him so close to our Creator that no forces of evil have and weight.

 

It was from Shabbos that Yosef was able to tap into and overcome his yetzer harah and run out of the house. In the same way that Hashem tells Avraham who thought he could not have children that he needs to go outside and count the stars. They are both things that happen outside. Outside of the physical world, outside of the normal constraints of nature and human capability. Leave the physical world and enter the Shabbos world. There the rules and game changes. There every Jew can rise up from the ashes. And thus each Shabbos when we sing Lecha Dodi we repeat this theme. His'naari his'o'reri- shake off the world, awaken and shine that light. It is the super power of Shabbos.

  

RABBI SCHWARTZ'S ERA’S AND THEIR PLACES AND PEOPLE IN ISRAEL OF THE WEEK

 

Unfinished Business end of Yoav- 837 BC- Shlomo Ha'Melech tried to be a nice guy when he inherited the reigns from Dovid by sparing his brother Adoniyahu, but sometimes a kings gotta do what a kings gotta do. And with Adoniyahu's attempted coup by asking Batsheva to give him Dovid's maid servant Avishag who kept him warm at night as his wife, he knew that there were still forces that unless they were taken care of would always be a thorn in his side. And thus he orders his loyal servant Benayahu ben Yehoyada to kill Adoniyahu, and he does. One down. Two more left to go in Shlomo's eyes.

 

The second person on his hit list was Aviathar the Kohen who had backed Adnoniyahu. Here unlike Adoniyahu, Shlomo had mercy. Aviathar was faithful and loyal to Dovid. As well, he was the only surviving Kohen from the city of Nov that Shaul had destroyed while he was seeking to Dovid who hid there. So Shlomo felt that to a large degree a bit of guilt over the death of their family as it was because they were seeking his father Dovid that the entire city was killed. Thus Shlomo ordered that Aviathar would be banished to his home city of Anatot. Today the city of Anatot is located off of Highway 60 near the valley that runs down to Nachal Perat. Those that do that incredible water hike can see where the arab village of Anata still stands. Incidentally that is also the city where the prophet Yirmiyahu was from.

 

Finally the last person to be dealt with was Dovid's former general and nephew, Yoav. Yoav had taken matters into his hands too many times. Killing his cousin Ammasa and Shaul's general Avner and now once again he had supported and encouraged Adoniyahu in his rebellion. Shlomo orders Benayahu to kill him, however Yoav seeing the writing on the wall runs to the Altar and grabs on to its corners and refuses to leave claiming that the Altar will protect him and not thinking that Shlomo would carry forth his decree in such a holy place. He was wrong.

 

Where was this altar and why didn't it protect him. Different midrashim suggest that it was not in the Temple, which had not been built yet obviously and it was located in either Shilo or Givon. Only the altar in the Temple had the power to afford sanctuary. The ones in the temporary location didn’t have that power. Regardless Shlomo gives the order and Yoav is killed there and his body is buried in the Midbar/ wilderness. The once proud general will not have a tomb that anyone would or could visit. Next week Shlomo' malchus really starts.

 

RABBI SCHWARTZ’S TERRIBLE DREIDEL GAMBLING JOKES OF THE WEEK

 

What did the father dreidel say to his daughter when he came home from work and found her still in the shower? What! You're still not dry and ready?

What did the dreidel tell the doctor? I've been having these dizzy spells

Q: What do you call Hanukkah gelt that you gamble with? A: Chocolate chips. 

Q: Did you hear about the two dreidels that fell in love? A: They met at a spin class. 

Q: How did the dreidel feel about calling in sick? A: He felt a little gelty.

"My son is something else," Mrs. Finkelstein told her friend. "He traveled to Las Vegas last week in a $25,000 car and returned a few days later in a $100,000 vehicle."

"Wow! He won that much money?" her friend replied. "He must really know how to gamble."

"Well, not really," said the mother. "He went in our car, but had to return by bus."

 

When Rivkah was called up for jury service, she asked the judge whether she could be excused.

"I don’t believe in capital punishment," she said, "and I wouldn’t want my views to prevent the trial from running its proper course".

The judge liked her thoughtfulness but had to tell her that she was perfectly suitable to serve on the jury.

"Madam," he explained, "This is not a murder trial, it's just a simple civil lawsuit. Mrs F is bringing this case against her husband because he gambled away the entire $25,000 he had promised her for her birthday so that she could carry out a make-over on her kitchen."

"OK," said Rivkah, "I'll join your jury - I could be wrong about capital punishment after all."

A rabbi, a minister, and a priest were playing poker when the police raided the game.

Turning to the priest, the lead police officer said, "Father Murphy, were you gambling?"

Turning his eyes to heaven, the priest whispered, "L*rd, forgive me for what I am about to do." To the police officer, he then said, "No, officer; I was not gambling."

The officer then asked the minister, "Pastor Johnson, were you gambling?"

Again, after an appeal to heaven, the minister replied, "No, officer; I was not gambling."

Turning to the rabbi, the officer again asked, "Rabbi Goldstein, were you gambling?"

Shrugging his shoulders, the rabbi replied, "With whom?

 

Moishe meets Arnold at their social club and asks how Abe’s funeral went the other day.

"It went OK, Moishe," replied Arnold, "but at the end of the Rabbi’s eulogy, I had to try and stop myself from laughing aloud."

"Why was that?" asks Moishe.

"Well," says Arnold, "throughout his marriage to Miriam, she was always telling me what a mean man he was. He never had a steady job and the money he brought home to her wasn't enough for food and clothing, let alone holidays. Yet he drank heavily and often stayed out all night gambling. Altogether, a good husband he was not. But at the funeral, the Rabbi spoke of how wonderful the deceased was - so considerate, so beloved, so thoughtful to others. Then, when the Rabbi had finished, I heard Miriam say to one of her children, "Do me a favour, David, go see whether it’s your father in the coffin."



Rabbi Bloom gets on the train and as soon as the doors close, a priest gets up, goes over to the rabbi and says, "Good morning rabbi. I have a question to ask you. Why is it that everybody thinks Jews are smarter than Gentiles?"

Rabbi Bloom, who is not up for an argument, says, "I’m sorry, but I am just a simple rabbi and I’m not really able to participate in such a discussion."

But the priest insists. "Look, no harm meant rabbi, but I have a theory and I need to test it out in the form of a bet. I’ll pay you $100 if you can ask me a question that I can't answer. But if I can ask you a question that you can't answer, you must pay me $100."

Rabbi Bloom replies, "But I’m a poor rabbi - I only have $10 on me."

The priest hesitates then says, "OK, rabbi, it’s my $100 against your $10."

Rabbi Bloom realises he can't get out of this so he agrees, but on condition that he asks the first question. The priest agrees.

"OK," says Rabbi Bloom, "what animal has scaly skin, the body of a cat, the face of a squirrel, the ears of a mouse, webbed toes and swims under water?"

Surprised, the priest admits that he doesn't know and asks the rabbi for a few more minutes to think about it. The rabbi agrees.

2 minutes later, the priest takes $100 from his wallet and gives it to the rabbi. The priest then asks the rabbi, "So what animal was it?"

Rabbi Bloom replies, "How should I know?" and gives the priest $10.

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Answer is C – So my first wrong answer on this exam. Well, no entirely wrong. I did know that UNSCOP the United Nation something Commission of (on?) Palestine were the ones that prepared the Partition Plan. But I actually thought that Nahariya was included in Israel's portions as it was a Jewish city. However had I thought about it for a few seconds I would've remembered that the top of the upper Western Galile was in Arab hands and so the original plan it was meant to be part of the Arab State. So another I guess it's 50/50 on this one leaving the score at Schwartz 3.5 and .5 for MOT (Ministry of Tourism) on this exam. .