Cigar Wars- Kit Teitzei 2015/5775

Insights and Inspiration

from the

Holy Land
from

Rabbi Ephraim Schwartz

"Your friend in Karmiel"

August 28^th 2015 -Volume 5, Issue 41 13th Elul 5775

Parshat Ki Teitzei

Cigar Wars

Yankel was a good Chasid. He loved his Rebbe the Imrei Emes of Ger, with all of his heart. When he was younger he studied the pearls of Torah his rebbe taught him so lovingly. As he grew older the Rebbe married him off and was the Sandak (godfather) for all his children’s circumcision. Each year along with 10’s of thousands of Chasidim from around Europe, Yankel would go to his Rebbe’s court for Rosh Hashanah. It was said that on the special train lines that the Polish government added for the high holidays, there were over ten thousand chasidim that came who ate on Yom Kippur and didn’t wear Tefillin…all boys under the age of Bar Mitzvah. Yet even with the thousands that came Yankel looked forward to his precious few private minutes with the Rebbe. He would get the Rebbe’s blessing for his family, his health and business. Yet, most important to Yankel was the blessing he would recieve for his continued spiritual growth.  He was enough of a Gerrer Chasid to know, that more than anything else, his relationship with Hashem and the inspiration to lead a vibrant Jewish life was the greatest gift one can have.

This Rosh Hashana though, the Rebbe surprised Yankel as he began to ask him about his business. Yankel shared with the Rebbe that his business was expanding and in fact in a few weeks he would be traveling for a few days to Paris to purchase more materials and to create new networks of supply. The Rebbe then made a request of Yankel.

“I heard that they sell very good cigars in Paris, would you be able to pick me up a box?”

Yankel was a bit taken aback. Was the Rebbe really thinking about cigars on the holiest of days?

Yet, he knew better then to question the Rebbe. He quickly assured the Rebbe that he would bring him two boxes of the very best he could find and would return within a month with the Rebbe’s cigars.

Sure enough two weeks later Yankel returned from his trip with the two boxes of cigars. The Rebbe after examining them closely though asked him if they were indeed purchased in Paris. Yankel blushed a little and apologized to the Rebbe. He explained that while he was in Paris he was so caught up in business that it totally slipped his mind. On the way home however, when he remembered, he made a stop in Belgium and bought the cigars over there.

“But don’t worry Rebbe” Yankel said “the cigars in Belgium are much better and I made sure to purchase the best of the best for the Rebbe’s pleasure”.

“Oy Yankeleh… Yankeleh”, the Rebbe sighed,

“Did you really think that I needed or had any interest in Cigars from either Paris or Belgium? It wasn’t the cigars I wanted it was the chasid that I wanted. I wanted you to remember that even though you may be in Paris you still have a Rebbe back in Ger that is waiting for you. A chasid in Paris is what I was hoping you would be and feel like. Not a business man without a Rebbe.”

This week’s Torah portion contains a unique mitzvah of war.

Ki Teitzei LiMmachaneh Al Oivecha V’Nishmartem mikol Davar Rah-When you go to camp against your enemy you should guard yourself from all bad things.

The bad things that the Torah is referring to here are in areas of licentiousness, impure thoughts and all matters that will distance oneself from God.

The Slonimer Rebbe notes how it is interesting that this mitzvah as opposed to the two other commandments of war preciously mentioned does not refer to it as a war rather as when one camps against the enemy. In addition both the commandment and the enemy are referred to in the singular form rather than the plural. He therefore suggests a deeper more meaningful understanding of the Parsha. What the Torah is hinting to us a here is not merely the global biblical warfare battles and its commandments, rather it is teaching us about our personal internal battles that we each are challenged by. And the enemy- the greatest enemy we have- is our Yetzer Harah the evil inclination that is there relentlessly to tempt us.

The previous Parshiyot describe and allude to how one must go out and engage that force whether it is in areas of observance, where we must know the places to avoid and the things that bring us down and actively battle those temptations. Or as the latter Parsha suggests there are even battles in matters of a permissible nature such as excesses where one must reign oneself (like the case of the captive women) or in our worship of God where we must offensively strategize how to win those battles. How we can put more energy into our prayers, our studies, our faith and our acts of kindness and even limit our exposure to the baser although permitted physical pleasures that come our way. In “times of war” changes have to be made

 Yet there are times when there is no ‘war” and this is what this final mitzvah is talking about. It is when one goes out in to the world to do his or her regular things. Shopping, Business, Teaching, Learning, Touring. It is here the Torah tells you that we are also vulnerable. Ki teitzei Machaneh- when we go out from our “camp”.  It could be vacation; it could be your workplace. Maybe Paris. You’re not in Shul you’re just doing your everyday thing. Vnishmartem Mikol Davar Rah- watch out. Protect yourself. Why?

Ki Hashem Elokecha Mit’Halech B’Kerev Machanecha - Because Hashem is always found within your camp. L’Hatzilcha- to save you and to place your enemy before you. When you leave home base,  to a place that may seem so innocent and so necessary, however if it is not part of your camp; if you feel that you are chutz la’Macheneh- outside of the camp than the extra protection we so need to inspire us to sanctify Hashem’s name is much harder to achieve. For His presence is found amongst the camp. And to paraphrase a US president who just a little over ten years ago said-You are either with us or against us- you’re either part of His camp or you’re not.

We read these Torah portions as we get closer and closer to Rosh Hashanah; the end of the year and the beginning of the year. There are so many battles, struggles and challenges each of us have gone through and may still yet face and yet the greatest battles are sages teach us are within ourselves. Yet perhaps the strongest weapon we have in our arsenal is knowing that we have a camp that we can always be attached to. We may not all have a Rebbe in Poland, as Yankel did, but we have a loving Father in heaven who is always amongst the Jewish people waiting and watching for us to reattach ourselves to our community. Imagine the nachas and pleasure He has as His children all gather in synagogues around the world as they join together and crown Him annually as our King. But once or twice a year is not enough. Neither is once a week, neither is even each day. We have to feel that we are part of His camp wherever we go and whatever we do. He’s not looking for cigars either or even for Chasidim. He’s looking for his children and for His soldiers to be standing tall at His side

Have an inspirational Shabbos,

Rabbi Ephraim Schwartz

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RABBI SCHWARTZ’S VIDEO OF THEWEEK

http://www.humansofjudaism.com/humansofjudaism/kimmelvid  – Yeshiva save SpongeBob on Kimmel Late night TV!

https://youtu.be/RVksB8Pqi5Y  - For the Yiddish speakers pretty ummmm interesting video Rebbe Nachman Uman Rosh Hashana..what do you think?

https://youtu.be/fi90dhz4Ou8 - Another pretty wild Yiddish music video…one really has to wonder what Rabbi Nachman must be thinking…? Gevald new …hit ? or not?

RABBI SCHWARTZ’S FAVORITE YIDDISH PROVERB OF THE WEEK

While in the states I picked up a great book with yiidsh quotes and wisdom and I have always wanted to teach my kids Yiddish so here we go each week another great proverb in yiddish maybe you guys will learn it too!!

“Gutskeit iz besser fun frumkeit”-  Kindness is better than piety.

RABBI SCHWARTZ'S FAVORITE QUOTES  OF THE WEEK

"I have made it a rule never to smoke more than one cigar at a time.” Mark Twain

.“ Smoking is indispensable if one has nothing to kiss.” Sigmund Freud

“The end of a good smoke is a little saddening. In some regard, it's a bit like losing a best friend who had time to sit and listen.” ~ Zen Warrior

RABBI SCHWARTZ'S TOUR GUIDE EXAM QUESTION OF THE WEEK

(New exam this week these questions are from the most recent tour guide exam-let’s see how I do)

answer below at end of Email

Baybars conquered from the Crusaders

A.    Akko and Akziv

B.     Ashkelon and Jerusalem

C.     Ein Jalut and Gaza

D.    Arsuf and Tzefat

.RABBI SCHWARTZ'S COOL MIDRASH OF THE WEEK

The weeks Portion tells us about the mitzvah to for one to put a fence around his roof so that no-one will fall off- “And blood not be in ones house”-The Midrash derives from here that it is not specifically the fence but anything that is dangerous shall not be in ones house. The Talmud says this refers specifically to “bad” dogs. It even tells a story about a woman who was pregnant whose baby aborted when she was frightened by a dog. When the owner told her not to worry because the dog has not teeth-“It’s all bark and no bite”. The Talmud tells us that it was to late… Lesson, the Maharsha says, even a dangerous looking dog is something one should not have in one’s house…. I just wish that Midrash would have said bunny rabbits as well…J

RABBI SCHWARTZ'S COOL THINGS TO DO IN ISRAEL OF THE WEEK-

That Yonah doesn’t think I can come up with each week…

Randomly bump into herds of animals on the roads – I don’t literally mean ‘bump’ into them of course, rather happen on to them. This week alone we had a herd of horses just running along by Mt. Bental in middle of the road, sheep and goats along the Judean wilderness trails and camels as well. The galilee has cows all over the place and in the evening hours on many roads one can see deer, fox and even wild boar. Israel is a country that raises wildlife and cattle and prides itself on its and they have full reign of the roads. Sure there’s other places you can see that. But I challenge you to find me anywhere else in the world that has a such a great variety as they do in Israel. It’s really an awesomely cool experience just driving down the road and just seeing these herds. Just very very cool!

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RABBI SCHWARTZ'S LAWYER JOKES OF THE WEEK

 A Russian, a Cuban, an American and a lawyer are riding on a train.
The Russian takes out a bottle of the best vodka out of his pack; pours some into a glass, drinks it, and says:
"In USSR, we have the best vodka of the world, nowhere in the world you can find vodka as good as the one we produce in Ukrainia. And we have so much of it, that we can just throw it away..."
Saying that, he goes to a window and throw the rest of the bottle through it. T he others are quite impressed.
The Cuban then pulls out a pack of Havanas, takes one of them, lights it and begins to smoke it saying: "In Cuba, we have the best cigars of the world: Havanas, nowhere in the world are there such good cigars and we have so many of them, that we can just throw them away..."
Saying that, he throws the pack of cigars through the window as the Conductor approaches. One more time, everybody is quite impressed.
Slowly, the American just stands up, with a superior smile.
He opens the window, and throws the lawyer through it...

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A guy traveling through the prairies of the USA stopped at a small town and went to a bar. He stood at the end of the bar, ordered a drink, and lit up a cigar.
As he sipped his drink, he stood there quietly blowing smoke rings.
After he blew nine or ten smoke rings into the air, an angry American Indian stomped up to him and said, "One more remark like that and I'll smash your face in!"

Yankel was in a lawsuit involving large sums of money and he was talking to his lawyer. "If I lose this case, I'll be ruined."
"It's in the judge's hands now," said the lawyer.
"Would it help if I sent the judge a box of cigars?"
"Oh no! This judge is a stickler or ethical behavior. A stunt like that would prejudice him against you. He might even hold you in contempt of court. In fact, you shouldn't even smile at the judge."
Within the course of time, the judge rendered a decision in favor of Yankel. As the he left the courthouse, he said to his lawyer, "Thanks for the tip about the cigars. It worked!"
His Lawyer responded "I'm sure we would have lost the case if you'd sent them."
"But, I did send them."
"What? You did?" said the lawyer, incredulously.
"Yes. That's how we won the case."
"I don't understand," said the lawyer.
"It's easy. I sent the cigars to the judge, but signed the plaintiff's name.

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Answer is D: OK So this Baibars guy was a former slave in Egypt who rebelled and pretty much cleaned the Crusaders out of Israel. He was a fierce warriaor proving himself first by getting rid of Ghengi Khan and the Mongolians in the battle of Ein Jalut. I knew that so therefore I knew that Ein Jalut was not the right answer as it wasn’t a Crusader Battle. I also tour Akko A lot and know that he didn’t  conquer Akko rather he sieged it and then left it. Knocked out two answers. Jerusalem was already conquered by the arabs before Baibars- that’s kind of the reason why they were based out of Akko. Which of course leaves Tzfat and Arsuf  apoliana as the correct answer. In Arsuf he used tremendous sieges engines and then they surrendered and he raazed it and in Tzfat he fortified the Crusader fortress and because it was so strategic. PS  If you ever have a tour guide that that is busy talking about Baibars in Tzfat for more than thirty seconds or so…you’ve got the wrong guide.

Jewish Occupation- Shoftim 2015/5775

Insights and Inspiration

from the

Holy Land
from

Rabbi Ephraim Schwartz

"Your friend in Karmiel"

August 21^st  2015 -Volume 5, Issue 40 6th Elul 5775

Parshat Shoftim

Jewish Occupation

“A Rabbi ??!!, What type of job is that for a nice young Jewish Boy?” My Savta didn’t pull any punches, neither did my great Auntie Franka of blessed memory. My parents weren’t too thrilled with the idea as well. “Eef you want to stahdy and learren a leetel beet- dat’s fine-eet’s wanderfool even,, but you have to provide for your faahmilee too” Let the goyim become rabbis,  A Jew should be a doctor or a lawyer, worst case an accountant, but a rabbi wasn’t gonna cut it for my family. So I went to college. I got my degree. In finance, of course- it was shorter and easier than law or medical school and allowed me to pursue my Semicha rabbinic ordination at the same time while I was in Kollel. It helped me tremendously in life, this degree of mine. I know understand the principles why I have no money. I think it’s something to do with getting a real job.

 My father really would have loved me at least to join him in his business. Although he’s not a doctor, but he prides himself on being an MD… a metal dealer. Selling metal was never really my thing. Why sell metal when I can sell God. So I spent many years doing exactly that. My yiddishkeit was enhanced by meeting and growing off the inspiration of my fellow brothers and sisters and their inspiration as we introduced them to Judaism. I even got to work on Shabbos J. After moving to Israel, when it was time in life to find a “real” job. I chose tour guiding once again relishing the opportunity to sell not metal but rather ‘Eretz Sh’Avaneha Barzel’- A land flowing with milk and honey whose very stones are compared to metal. And there you have it my Jewish career.

The truth is though it’s a fascinating thing about the Jewish people. According to my informal google searches Ivy League schools have anywhere from 15-30% Jewish students in grad school. In medical and law schools it’s even higher.  We are about 2-3 % of the population but are overwhelming represented in the fields that require higher education, the US supreme court and even in the hi tech world. This is not only explained by the higher IQ that Jews possess which has certainly been documented. But rather by a intense drive by Jews to “make it”; to fix the world. We have something in us as a nation driving us to create a complete society that functions, with laws, with longevity, that solves the problems the world faces with poverty and dysfunction. Now if only we could get everyone to realize that the place that we are meant to do that from is Israel… Than we could really get things done.

This week’s Torah portion describes for us the process of setting up our country when we arrive here. It begins with the fascinating mitzvah of setting up judges and officers of the law in all the gates of our cities. Our sages explain this mitzvah and qualify and quantify it. There is meant to be a court in Jerusalem where whenever we have a difficult case we shall “Go up the place to that I have chosen for you and you shall come to the Kohen and Levi that will be in your days and you shall ask of them and they will tell you the law that you shall follow.”. Our sages teach us that the court in Jerusalem would have 120 members on it, each minor city would have a court of 23 Judges. A city incidentally would have to have at least 120 people in it. This is a pretty mind-blowing concept if you think about and crunch these numbers a bit. Where’s my Jewish accountants to do the math here? Each Judge had two understudies. Which would mean that in a city of 120 people 69 of them would be part of the court system. I know we need Jewish lawyers and judges, but really?! More than half the population? I mean I know that we are a litigious people, but we don’t really do the petty crime thing, how much court do we need.

Rabbi Yochanan Zweig offers a fantastic insight, which is that the function of a Jewish court system is not to merely enforce the law. In fact he argues, that if a court and justice system is only about enforcing, punishing and delivering verdicts and justice than the legal system becomes a game of “is it worth the risk-or not?”. Jews are not meant to uphold the laws because “crime doesn’t pay” rather it’s because crime is wrong. It’s a sin. It’s a mistake that will remove you from Hashem and ultimately prevent you from fulfilling yourself and achieving the Divine mandate for which we are here.  A Jewish court system is meant to create a society that appreciates Hashem; that teaches and serves the world as role models of the beauty of the Divine system of Law that Torah and Mitzvos provide. It is for that reason, the Torah tells us that the most important part of our society is to have the court system not merely to enforce, but rather to inspire society, to serve as a place where we can hear the word of Hashem. It is for this reason, he suggests, that our Torah portion is adjacent to the portion, from last week’s Torah portion that describes the mitzvah of the holiday of Sukkot. Sukkot is the holiday when we leave our physical homes and enter into the Divine Shade of Hashem’s glory for a week. When all our physical surroundings are of being in the presence of Hashem and the Divine glory. That’s what our cities are meant to look like. That’s what our land is meant to look like. It is that light we are meant to shine out to the world.

There is a story told about Rav Avraham Pam, the great and most humble of Roshei Yeshivas of Torah V’Daas in New York, who was once summoned to Din Torah. It seems that someone had some financial claims against the Yeshiva and they went to the Jewish court and subpoenaed the great elderly Rabbi to come to court. His students were aghast at the audacity of this individual. How dare he summon the Rabbi to court like one would any simple litigant? Didn’t he realize this was one of the greatest Rabbis of the generation? When they approached Rav Pam though, he was perplexed. He couldn’t understand what the tumult was all about.

 “I have been called to a holy Jewish court, to seek out the word of Hashem. This is a mitzvah of the highest order. It is an opportunity to hear what Hashem wants us to do. This is an honor. How could one think otherwise?”

We are in the month of Elul and it is a time when we begin to prepare ourselves for Rosh Hashana-our annual day of Judgement. These are days that are reffered to as Yamim Noraim- Days of Awe. There are many that tremble during these days, out of fear for what the New Year holds for us. Many are busy doing the mitzvah of Teshuva, bettering our ways, aking forgiveness from those that we wronged. These are all important things. Yet the bulk of our prayers on the holy days that approach us will be about the “big plan” for the world. That Hashem’s kingdom will reign supreme. That sin will be destroyed and that the land will rejoice in the ultimate fulfillment of our Divine mandate. We will feel the holiness. The world will acknowledge the truth. Parshat Shoftim, which is always read in the beginning of this month serves as a reminder to us of this big picture. A world of justice. A world where there will be no need for lawyers and even doctors, as we will have achieved the perfection and brought the world to its ultimate Tikun. We’ll still need Rabbis and tour guides though… I think

 Have a magnificent Shabbos,

Rabbi Ephraim Schwartz

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RABBI SCHWARTZ’S VIDEO OF THEWEEK

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l463vS68reA&safe=active – Hakol Lavtova great new song from my friend Yosef Chaim Shwekey

https://soundcloud.com/ephraim-schwartz/asher-bara - My latest song composition “Asher Bara” composed in honor of the wedding this week of my dear friend’s daughter..Mazel Tov!

RABBI SCHWARTZ’S FAVORITE YIDDISH PROVERB OF THE WEEK

While in the states I picked up a great book with yiidsh quotes and wisdom and I have always wanted to teach my kids Yiddish so here we go each week another great proverb in yiddish maybe you guys will learn it too!!

“Aider me zogt arois s’vort, iz men a har; dernoch iz men a nar”-  Before you utter a word you are the master; afterwards you’re a fool.

RABBI SCHWARTZ'S FAVORITE QUOTES  OF THE WEEK

"Doctors are just the same as lawyers; the only difference is that lawyers merely rob you, whereas doctors rob you and kill you too..”-Anton Chekov

.“ Where there are too many policemen, there is no liberty. Where there are too many soldiers, there is no peace. Where there are too many lawyers, there is no justice.”-Lin Yutang

RABBI SCHWARTZ'S TOUR GUIDE EXAM QUESTION OF THE WEEK

(New exam this week these questions are from the most recent tour guide exam-let’s see how I do)

answer below at end of Email

The first Crusader King was

A.    Godefroy de Bouillon

B.     Baldwin the First

C.     Richard the Lion Heart

D.    Fredrick the First

.RABBI SCHWARTZ'S COOL MIDRASH OF THE WEEK

The weeks Portion tells us about the mitzvah to build cities Arei Miklat of refuge for someone who kills someone else unintentionally to flee there. The law is that the court is obligated to put up signs all over telling people how to get there, so there would not be any need for them to ask people directions. The signs probably said Ir Miqlat though with a “Q” as it seems Israelis have a thing for that letter in all the cities here. The reason for this specific mitzvah for signs, the midrash tells us is so as not embarrass the murderer and force him to humiliate himself. Rabbi Chama Bar Chanina applied the verse “Good an upright is Hashem, therefore he instructs sinners the way”. If Hashem is so concerned that even sinners find the right way certainly much more so he does so for the righteous.

It’s interesting that the counter to this mitzvah is the pilgrimage road to Jerusalem, there were no signs in order that people would ask others and increase the glory of the mitzvah inspiring others to come with them to Jerusalem. They would be forced to ask directions. And others would then join them. I can tell you the way if anyone out there wants to come. I’m heading there next week J

RABBI SCHWARTZ'S COOL THINGS TO DO IN ISRAEL OF THE WEEK-

That Yonah doesn’t think I can come up with each week…

Finding your Bashert – They tell me that there is a Shidduch Crisis or as others refer to ita Shidduch Catastrophe in America. Maybe it’s another sign and gentle push from Hashem for people to come move to Israel. Here in Israel it seems there are plenty of nice guys and girls to marry (I know one of the latter J). But many people have told me that it is much easier here. First of all being an American is an added benefit here as well as speaking English helps. Second since there are a much smaller population and demographic of American Olim here so there’s great networks and a pretty much even playing field without all the competition that goes on in the States. In addition, weddings are cheaper here, people are much more laid back about them and everyone is your family and participates in your simcha. Finally finally how cool is it that finding your Bashert here and marrying her is a fulfillment of the ancient promise and prophecy that the streets will once again be filled with the sounds of Brides and Grooms from their wedding feast. Jeremiah never said that about the Terrace on the Park in New York….

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RABBI SCHWARTZ'S LAWYER JOKES OF THE WEEK

 lawyer and an elderly Hasidic man are sitting next to each other on a long flight. The lawyer is thinking that Hasidim are so dumb that he could get over on them easily. So the lawyer asks the Hasid if he would like to play a fun game.

The old Hasidic man is tired and just wants to take a nap, so he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The lawyer persists and says that the game is a lot of fun. "I ask you a question and if you don't know the answer, you pay me only $5. You ask me a question and if I don't know the answer, I will pay you $500".

This catches the Hasidic man's attention and to keep the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game.

The lawyer asks the first question. "What's the distance from the Earth to the Moon?" The elderly Hasid doesn't say a word, reaches in his pocket, pulls out a five dollar bill and hands it to the lawyer.

Now it's the Hasid's turn. He asks the lawyer "What goes up a hill with three legs and comes down the hill with four?"

The lawyer is stumped, so he uses his laptop and searches all references he could find on the Interet. He sends emails to all the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour of searching, he finally gives up. He wakes up the Hasidic man and hands him $500. The old Hasid pockets the $500 and goes back to sleep.

The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He wakes up the elderly man and asks "Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and comes down with four?"

The Hasid shrugs, reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5 and goes back to sleep.

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Q: In the Jewish doctrine, when does a fetus become a human?

A: When it graduates from Law school. 

Q: How can you tell if someone is half Catholic and half Jewish?

A: When he goes to confession, he takes a lawyer with him. 

A lawyer, a Jew and a Hindu were on vacation. They were taking a road trip through the backwoods of Tennessee and they were tired but could find no hotel with a room to rent for the night. They came across a farmhouse and thought they might as well try to convince the owner to let them stay there.

“Sure, y’all can stay here tonight,” the farmer said. “But the guest bedroom only sleeps two so one of you will have to sleep in the barn. Don’t worry about that barn — it’s nice out there and I sleep there myself when the wife is mad at me.”

The barn sounded good to the Hindu.

“Y’all take the bed and I’ll sleep out in the barn,” he said.

So, the lawyer and the Jew were getting settled down in the bed when they heard a knock at the door. It was the Hindu.

“There’s a cow out there,” he said. “It’s against my religion to sleep with a cow.”

“No problem,” the Jew said. “You two take the bed and I’ll go sleep in the barn.”

So the lawyer and the Hindu were getting settled down in the bed when they heard a knock at the door. It was the Jew.

“There’s a pig out there. There’s no way I’m sleeping with a pig.”

“Fine,” the lawyer said. “You two take the bed and I’ll go sleep in the barn.”

The Jew and the Hindu were getting settled down in the bed when they heard a knock at the door.

It was the cow and the pig.

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Answer is B: So this is a really trick question. First of all a bit about the Crusaders. They were really bad people. They slaughtered Jews and destroyed Jewish communities on their way to Israel to redeem the land from the Moslem infidels. They killed them too. The first Crusade was led by Godfrey and his brother Baldwin. Godfrey was the first ruler but…. He chose not to take the title King. Believing that there was only on “king” of Jerusalem. Sadly it wasn’t “The King” Hashem but someone who impersonated as “His”  prophet/son/Messiah. His brother though didn’t have some compunction and had no problem declaring himself as king. Richie and Freddy were in the Third Crusade, after the Crusaders were thrown out by Salaadin. Freddy also known as Barabarossa never made it here, he drowned along the way, which is a good thing. Richard did make it here and setteled it up with Saladdin, when he lost his battle at the Horns of Hittin and he they then moved the capital from Jerusalem to Akko

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Happy Times- Re'eh 2015/5775

Insights and Inspiration

from the

Holy Land
from

Rabbi Ephraim Schwartz

"Your friend in Karmiel"

August 13^th 2015 -Volume 5, Issue 39 30th of Av/Rosh Chodesh Elul 5775

Parshat Re’eh

Happy Times

I’m missing about seven or eight weddings this summer. I like weddings. Sharing in the Simchas of my friends, seeing new generations moving forward, the beauty of the moment under the chupah, the singing and dancing and of course the food. There’s nothing like a good American smorgasbord. It would be sinful if it wouldn’t be a mitzvah. And I like mitzvas like thatJ. These are weddings of close friends of mine’s children, friends and neighbors here in Israel, my rebbe’s last child to marry off and even students and congregants of mine. It’s really inconsiderate, I think, of people to plan these things during my busisest season. What’s wrong with a nice February or March wedding when I sit at home at night and wonder what I should do as I munch on leftovers from Shabbos? Why can’t people take a tour guides business into consideration?

One of my close childhood friends even offered me a ticket to fly in to the States for their child’s wedding. When I told him how sorry I was that I couldn’t make it. He sent me a  cryptic message, a quote from our sages in the Talmud- “Adam Doeg Al Ibud Damav V’Aino Doeg al Ibud Yamav- Damav Einam Ozrim V’Yamav Einom Chozrim”- A man worries about the loss of his money and doesn’t worry about the loss of his days. Money doesn’t help you and Your days never come back.” Ouch. I of course responded that for me this wasn’t a financial decision (at least entirely) as of course I knew that he would cover any losses I might have- he’s good that way J- nice to have friends like that, Isn’t it?- Rather, I had given my word to my tourists that I would guide them and they of course booked their trip here with their family based on that.- Tip- smart prerequisite to booking your trip is to contact me first J. So I could not go back on my word. I told him that I was glad he sent me that message, because it shows he understand as King David rights. Who is a man who desires life and loves his days-he guards his tounge from speaking evil and his lips from speaking falsehood. So obviously his message to me was that I shouldn’t come and should keep my word. But that I would remind him of his quote God- willing by my daughter’s wedding- It should happen soon-…Happy Birthday Shani!

 Have to pause now for Shidduch plug- Shani Schwartz is officially on the market to the lucky guy who gets to marry her- she’s looking for someone who will support her father in Kollel for many years JJ Contact my wife with all suggestions Alizaschwartz@ yahoo.com As I have ben banned from talking to matchmakers- I can’t understand why?:)))- Now back to our regular E-Mail.

Anyways jokes aside my friends words struck me. Their important words to live by and lead ones life by. Money doesn’t help and your days never come back. This weeks Torah portion contains in it one of the last messges and mitzvos that Moshe gives to the Jewish people before they will enter the land of Israel. All of the Book of Devarim, known as the Mishneh Torah- the repetition of the Torah, are not merely just additional commandments but rather grousp fo mitzvos that contain the critical principles and mindset one needs to be successful in our fulfilling our mandate and ‘making it’ in the world and land we are entering. Think of it as a father’s last messages to his children from his deathbed. In this weeks Torah portion the Mitzvah that Moshe conveys and the principle he is teaching the nation about is Simcha- joy.

Seven times in this week’s portion this mitzvah come’s up. Incredibly most of it has to do with food and money. We are told about bringing all our sacrifices to Jerusalem and only slaughtering them in the Temple. Sure a Jew understands that we have offer our thanks to Hashem or atone for our sins. By why shlep all the way to Israel. Can’t I just do it in my little shteibel in Brooklyn? Isn’t Hashem everywhere? The answer is, Yes, he certainly is. But for you to really feel happy come to My Home- Hashem says come visit. We are told about the mitzvas of tithes. A man works hard, prays for rain, plows, plants, reaps and it finally grows. OK so I have to thank Hashem, but now I gotta give to the Kohen and then 10% to the Levi. To these guys that don’t’ work and are studying all day? Yes. You know why. So that you’ll feel happy. That you realize that the blessings you have are given to you to share. And there’s a lot more from where they came. In fact Hashem says- test me. Aser Te’Aser Tithe and I will make you rich. Not just that I will cover your losses, but in fact make you rich. Like, bring your best friend in to your daughter’s wedding rich J. It’s like a kid in a magic show and the magician says throw in a nickel and I’ll turn into a hundred dollar bill, and the kid doesn’t want to throw in the nickel. The kid doesn’t want to find the happiness that will come. He’s Doeg Al Damav and not Yamav.

Perhaps even most fascinating is the mitzvah of Maaser Sheni. When we are commanded to take our tithe again 10% of our crops and bring them to Israel, to Jerusalem and….eat them there. And if it’s to long to shlep then you should convert it to money and then take the money and buy food and eat in Jerusalem. But why!!? I like my dining room. My wife’s cooking. I hate driving to Jerusalem. The traffic is crazy. Parking is impossible. I understand my sacrifices to Hashem I should bring to his Home. I understand I have to give to the Kohen and the Levi. But my own food too? The answer again is yes and Yes. I want you to be happy. Spend money on yourself, on your own happiness and holiness. 10% of your earnings should go to your ‘Take Abba to Israel and Jerusalem fund’. You need to feel the joy of coming home to our Father’s house.  You shouldn’t just make you alimony payments to charity or to Israel; take my money and leave me alone. This should be your Simcha fund. All of your money should be a Simcha fund.

The mitzvos continue with charity. Helping the poor and the needy, the widows and the orphans. We all understand the mitzvah. It’s our social obligation. We have to be kind and generous. Hashem is telling us your missing the point. It’s not for them. It’s for you. It’s so that you will be happy. Your money won’t make you happy. The act of charity will give you such joy, such connection to your fellow man, to our Father, it’s for this reason we need to give. To bring Joy to the world. Finally the Parsha concludes with the Jewish holidays and pilgrimage festivals combine all of these concepts. We visit Hashem three times a year and we bring and take care of the poor and needy together with us. We give to the Levio the Kohen and we do this three times a year. It all concludes with Sukkos times when we are told. V’Hayisa Ach Samayach- you will be only happy. Entirely and totally happy. Pure bliss. No worries. We’re all together, We’re in our Abba’s house. He’s got a big credit card and is not only footing the bill for everything, but will be giving us all blessing- Bakol Mishlach Yadeinu- in anything we stretch out our hand for this is what it’s all about. This is Moshe’s message to our nation

We are entering the month of Elul. The month where we are getting closer to our beloved. A month and season that will conclude with that holiday of Sukkot. Our work in this month is to begin to return to Hashem to focus on our days. Each one is precious. Tragically many peoples High holiday prayers are focused on their money rather than on their days, rather on the finding and achieving the happiness that is just waiting for us. This month our sages tell us increase your charity. Start to feel it. Be happy. God willing by Sukkot, we’ll all be here together celebrating together.

Have an joyous Shabbos and fantastic Rosh Chodesh,

Rabbi Ephraim Schwartz

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RABBI SCHWARTZ’S VIDEO OF THEWEEK

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Sr4jSBlk7rM- Rak Simcha- awesome song sits in your brain

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dyMrufF1C-c- Nachas simcha song

and of course the classic

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=huTq8hWT5pE –Eis Rikod Shwekey

RABBI SCHWARTZ’S FAVORITE YIDDISH PROVERB OF THE WEEK

While in the states I picked up a great book with yiidsh quotes and wisdom and I have always wanted to teach my kids Yiddish so here we go each week another great proverb in yiddish maybe you guys will learn it too!!

“A mayse on a moshl iz vi a moltsayt on a tsimes.”-  A story without a moral is like a meal without a sweet dish-(tzimmis is a sweet carrot dish)

RABBI SCHWARTZ'S FAVORITE QUOTES  OF THE WEEK

"Happiness cannot be traveled to, owned, earned, worn or consumed. Happiness is the spiritual experience of living every minute with love, grace, and gratitude.”-Denis Waitley

.“ Most folks are as happy as they make up their minds to be.”-Abraham Lincoln

 “ Money doesn't make you happy. I now have $50 million but I was just as happy when I had $48 million.”-Arnold Schwarzenegger

RABBI SCHWARTZ'S TOUR GUIDE EXAM QUESTION OF THE WEEK

(New exam this week these questions are from the most recent tour guide exam-let’s see how I do)

answer below at end of Email

An early synagogue that contains a “catedra D’Moshe” (Moses Chair) can be found in

A.    Tzippori

B.     Ein Gedi

C.     Korazim

D.    Kfar Nachum

.RABBI SCHWARTZ'S COOL MIDRASH OF THE WEEK

The Midrash this week on the mitzva of Tithing tells us the story of the famous donkey of Rav Pinchas Ben Yair who was as meticulous as his master in only eating food that had all of the tithes taken off of it. He once lodged at an inn and the Donkey refused to eat.Whereas Rabbi Pinchas said "Even this poor animal wants to preform the Creators will and yet you offer it tevel/untithed food"!

He went from there to another city as well where they were suffering from a plague of of mice infesting all their food. When the people complained to Rav Pinchas the Midrash says, he summoned all the mice to him and they started squealing and whistling. Rav pinchas turned to the people and told them that the mice are telling him that they were sent from heaven to devour their food because they had not tithed  properly. The people repented and teh mice left and were never heard from again. So if any one has a mice problem out there....

RABBI SCHWARTZ'S COOL THINGS TO DO IN ISRAEL OF THE WEEK-

That Yonah doesn’t think I can come up with each week…

Jewish outdoor musicians – All of the world you have people on street corners with their guitars strumming and hoping to get some money thrown in to their cases from people passing by. But in Israel it’s all Jewish music. Walk into the Jaffa Gate and theirs a young lady playing a harp and Yerushalayim Shel Zahav. By Ben Yehudah street you’ll find all types of Jewish musicians on the streets. Tiberias on the boardwalk, Tzfat’s fiddlers and ancient musical instruments. And most night cafes in these vacation cities are alive with the sounds of music. Songs to Hashem, Songs about the land of Israel, Songs that warm the Jewish heart. Sure you’ll have some Sinatra or some old 70’s music secular music thrown in as well here and there. But overwhelmingly. The Land Of Israel is a festive country that celebrates. Random people may start to join in and sing and dance with strangers. Some tour guides even join in as well J.  

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RABBI SCHWARTZ'S JOKES OF THE WEEK

So Moishe comes home and eats the delicious meal his wife prepared and as he is wiping is mouth after he gobbles it all down turns to her and empathetically says

“It must be so difficult for you. You work so many hours to prepare such a meal and I just walk in here and its gone in 10 minutes. I can’t imagine how that must feel.”

 “Sure you can” Rivky says “It’s like when you go out and work so hard for a whole month and I go to the mall afterwards and it’s all gone in twenty minutes!”

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Answer is C: This one was somewhat easier from me. I’ve been to Tzippori and Ein Gedi and know there’s no Moshe’s chair there. Which left the last two. Moshe’s chair sounds Christian and Kfar Nachum is a Christian place-Jewish city that chucked out the J- Man in the ‘new’ testament. But that would be too easy. The right answer is Korazim a city from the Talmud times that’s actually pretty cool although not cool enough for me to shlep people there yet. The Moshe chair which is what its called in the new testament and also interestingly enough in the medrash of pirkei drav kahana. Is like a stand that the rabbi would speak from. Called Moshe after Hashem gives him the Torah. Others suggest that it was a misreading and really it was the Droshe stand Drosha being the speech. Anyways there you go.

Natural Heeling- Eikev 2015/5775

Insights and Inspiration

from the

Holy Land
from

Rabbi Ephraim Schwartz

"Your friend in Karmiel"

August 8^th 2015 -Volume 5, Issue 38 22^nd of Av 5775

Parshat Eikev

Natural Heeling

Yair is a friend of mine. But he’s a bit different than you and I. We live in the city or the suburbs. We have a house. We get our food from the supermarket or lately it seems more often than not at hotels for breakfast, falafel and pizza stores for lunch and some nice restaurants for dinner. Oyy the rough life of being a tour guide. We spend an inordinate amount of time on our phone and computer. We have children that see Dadddy do that and can’t wait till they grow up and do and have all that too. In fact, a few weeks ago I took my little 5 year old Tully along with me on Friday afternoon to Tzfat, and showed him all the sites. What most enthralled him though was all the free drinks and ice creams many of my frequent restaurants and kiosks were giving me and him as we passed by-in appreciation of the frequent customers that I’m there with. At the end of the day Tully warmed my heart when he turned to me and said “Daddy, I also want to be a tour guide like you”. After a few minutes though he began to ponder and turned to me with a more somber and concerned look and asked “Do I have to be fat to be a Tour guide...?” Oyy...Good question, my son... good question.

But anyways, back to Yair. Yair is different. He is not fat. In fact he is skinny. He does not live in a city, suburb or even a house. He lives in the forest. Yaar Baal Shem Tov to be precise. He is married with 5 kids. I believe that he might have a computer. His phone is definitely not anything too ‘smart’. He does have a nice piano though, out there in his small home-made shack in the woods. He also has a hand operated washing machine that he’s quite proud of having made. Food? Well, Yair and his lovely wife Tovi and their children are vegans. They only like to eat what’s natural. Unlike me who also likes natural though I define it as food that doesn’t bite me when I put it in my mouth, they only eat things that comes out of the ground. No milk or cheese either. “Just like Adam and Eve in the garden of Eden”he tells me. He does have goats though, but that’s just because he like the sounds that they make. The water they have on good days comes in from a pipe that runs a few kilometers from a natural water source nearby. It gets clogged up, but they don’t need so much. “Vegans, don’t really sweat” he tells me. He does have solar panels that provide some electricity for their lights. He feels like he’s cheating a bit by doing this, and even points out to me that even the energy efficient LED bulbs he has attracts bugs, which natural fire wouldn’t- he claims. Although I remember getting bitten up by all the campfires I used to go to. But maybe because those mosquitos also wanted a taste of those hotdogs or s’mores that I had just eaten, that of course wouldn’t be found in Yair’s ‘natural’ lifestyle. Yet, Yair explains guiltily, that although he’s still cheating with that electricity, it’s because he’s originally a city boy, (raised in Telshe Stone) and his still in the process of weaning himself off of that as well. As I said Yair’s different than you and I.

Is this fair for his children? He asks me is my lifestyle, our lifestyle fair for ours. I visited him this past week and asked him if I could bring anything. He asked for two bags of ice cubes. It was after all 115 degrees outside. I can tell you, though I have never seen children so enthralled with ice cubes though in my life. It would’ve taken me buying my own children a brand new I-Phone with unlimited data and texting to get even half the excitement that filled Yair’s home. Ice cubes... I can tell you that Yair’s children (all but the oldest incidentally born ‘naturally’ in the forest) are some of the truly happiest children I have ever met. Each day they come home from school excited over the different activities that they do. Renovating their bedrooms with newer and prettier stones that they fine, carving out wood, making pottery art taking care of their goats, and running freely through the mountains of the Galilee with their pet dogs. When, their father comes home all of the children come running up to see him and greet him, excitedly showing him all they have done each day. My tourists that I brought with me to visit him, remarked how they only wished their children would look up for a minute from their computers to even nod at him when he walks into their room. So, his words echo in my mind, is our lifestyle truly being fair to our children? Fair to ourselves?

Don’t’ get worried. I’m not going vegan or moving out to a forest anytime soon. It would be hard to write this weekly E-Mail from there. But my visits to Yair never fail to inspire me. His incredible ability to see beyond the “norm” and to actually have the resolve to do something and be different to live and raise his family in what he calls an “authentic, natural lifestyle”. His love and connection to the Eretz Yisrael and how he doesn’t want to taint that with anything “made in China”, any South American beef, or anything to distract him and his appreciation of what the Torah describes in this week’s Torah portion repeatedly as the “good land”, is one of the most beautiful things I can only aspire to feel. I admire his and his wife’s determination to turn off all the noise, all the media and commercial manipulations, messages and alternative distractions and pursuits that I think we can all acknowledge dominate our existence. The noise is so loud, we can’t hear the sound that I hear at night at Yair’s den, of the earth and land and even of Hashem calling out to me anymore. Somehow “natural” seems tempting even to me.

The portion this week is called Eikev. It’s an interesting name for a Parshaas the word literally means heel. Yes, like on the bottom of your foot. The title for the portion comes from the first verse which uses the word in an entirely different way. The verse reads and

 And it shall be Eikev you will listen to my laws and you will observe and perform them and Hashem your God will guard for you the covenant and the kindness which he swore to your forefathers. And he will love you and bless you and multiply you...

The commentaries all struggle to understand the context of the word Eikev here. Some suggest it should be read in exchange for listening to my laws, others understand the word to mean as a result of following the laws and yet others see it as meaning that as soon as you follow my laws. Rashi however diverts from his usual way of interpreting the verse according to the simple meaning and reads the word as heel. And understands that Hashem is telling the people to be diligent about those simple mitzvahs that one might neglect and step on with his heel. I find it fascinating that our holy language of Hebrew this one word can mean all of the various interpretation. The question is what all the other translations of the word have to do with a heel.

The great Rebbe of Sassov suggests an interesting homiletical interpretation. He said if a person will listen to his heel than he will have these laws and he will guard and observe them. I’ve had long hard day hiking in the desert. And I know what my heels are saying to me. But the Rebbe was referring to something else entirely. The heel is the lowest and hardest part of the body. It has the thickest skin. It’s not easy to get through to the heel. But the heel is the part that most connects to the ground, to the earth. If we listen to the heel meaning try to understand what the most natural state of the world is asking from you to do, instead of just marching forward to wherever the rest of the body wants us to go. Than inevitably we will find that we would observe the mitzvos and bring the world to its fulfillment.

I thought about this idea a lot since visiting Yair. He’s listening to his heel. He only wants to connect to Hashem through the holy land of Israel whose cry to him he is listening to. The natural state of the world sings praise to Hashem. How often do we stop to hear that song? Do we let it touch and move our spirits? Are we treading on holy earth with heavy boots and shoes with our earphones plugged in our fingers texting and our minds online? Have we lost our connection to the beauty of Creation that is waiting for our composition, longing for the blessing that we are meant to bring as soon as we bring that song to its incredible climax? The Torah portion ofEikev is replete with this idea. The natural state of the Land and its blessing is dependent on the mitzvos that we do and the sanctification we bring to the land. The rains will fall or not fall based on our heeding our Eikev. We will win or lose our battles and challenges Eikev. Nachmanides notes that the heel is bent and curved. From the bottom it moves up. It is the natural circle of life and the Torah and Mitzvalifestyle in the land is what will allow the earth and blessing to flow.

Perhaps the most poignant idea that I heard about the Eikev, though is one I heard from Rav Moshe Shapiro. He suggested that generation before Mashiach comes is called the Ekvita D’Mashiach, the heels of Mashiach. For the generation before Mashiach may be the toughest and the thickest skinned and the hardest to penetrate and elicit and emotion, feeling or sensation from. The apathy will be overwhelming. Yet there is one thing that can get through to the heel. That he suggests is a little tickle. It doesn’t need any big booms or slaps. One just needs to tickle it with love and laughter and just watch that heel start to kick and jump. Now you know why there’s a joke in my weekly E-Mail J. We have finished our period of mourning for our Temple. We are in what our sages refer to as the 7 weeks of comfort and consoling. It’s the time for healing. It’s the time when we can get out and listen to our heels as we explore the beauty of the world that Hashem has given us. It’s the time when we can bring a smile and a hug to someone who needs it. All we need is that tickle. Mashiach is awaiting our heels.

Have an amazing Shabbos

Rabbi Ephraim Schwartz

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RABBI SCHWARTZ’S FAVORITE YIDDISH PROVERB OF THE WEEK

While in the states I picked up a great book with yiddsh quotes and wisdom and I have always wanted to teach my kids Yiddish so here we go each week another great proverb in yiddish maybe you guys will learn it too!!

“A melocheh iz a melucheh, ober men hot nit kain minut menucheh.”-  A trade makes you a king but robs you of leisure.

RABBI SCHWARTZ'S FAVORITE QUOTES  OF THE WEEK

"Let food be thy medicine and medicine be thy food”  -Hippocrates

.“Healthy is merely the slowest rate at which one can die.”-Unknown

“ Now there are more overweight people in America than average-weight people. So overweight people are now average. Which means you’ve met your New Year’s resolution.” - Jay Leno

RABBI SCHWARTZ'S TOUR GUIDE EXAM QUESTION OF THE WEEK

(New exam this week these questions are from the most recent tour guide exam-let’s see how I do)

answer below at end of Email

The Empress that is from the Byzantine period that is connected to building in Jerusalem is

1. A.    Eudocia
2. B.     Breccia
3. C.     Melisinda
4. D.    Roxelana

.RABBI SCHWARTZ'S COOL MIDRASH OF THE WEEK

The second chapter of Shema ends with a blessing of longevity:
(If you observe the Mitzvot listed above - Tefillin, Mezuzot and learning Torah)...
"In order that your days and those of your children will be long ... on the land that Hashem swore to your fathers to give to them." (Eikev, 11:21).

The Talmud (Brachot 8a) relates that when they told Reb Yochanan that there were elderly people in Bavel, he was surprised, seeing as from the above posuk (verse) it is clear that longevity is restricted to "the land" which refers to Eretz Yisroel (the land of Israel), and not the Diaspora. But when they informed him that the elders of Bavel would arrive in shul (synagogue) early to daven (pray) each morning and stay there late into the evening, he understood that it was through their attachment to the shul that they merited old age.

The Kli Yakar answers explains this Midrash with a Talmud in Megilah (29a), which states that every shul is an integral part of Eretz Yisroel. The Talmud quotes Reb Eliezer, who says that the shuls in Bavel will one day be relocated to Eretz Yisroel. In that case, concludes the Kli Yakar, a Jew who davens in shul is actually standing in the Holy Land. Those people who lived in the shul, so to speak, and who grow old, are people who are growing old in Eretz Yisroel. One of the miracles that will occur during the final redemption is that all shuls and batei midrash (houses of study) will be flown to Eretz Yisroel.

Thus, the Kli Yakar concludes, whoever rises early to go to shul and stays in shul late gives more honor to the house of Hashem.Therefore Hashem "prolongs his days ... on the land" because it is as if he spends the best part of his days in Eretz Yisroel.

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RABBI SCHWARTZ'S COOL THINGS TO DO IN ISRAEL OF THE WEEK-

That Yonah doesn’t think I can come up with each week...

Bentch with Kavana - Now I know that there are some of my readers that may not be familiar with the above terms, but I didn’t know how to write it in English. Bentching is the Yiddish word for blessing and it is commonly used as term for the grace after the meals that we recite and are biblically commanded (in this weeks Torah portion) to do. Why it’s called bentch? Presumably because after eating a nice shwarma in a Laffa Pita or a hefty Jewish Shabbos meal you really can’t move and feel benched. Ouch! Kavana is the intent and the focus one has when reciting the bentching and recognizing that one is thanking Hashem for the delicious meal one has just eaten. This is done everywhere a Jew eats including the Diaspora. But in Israel it is and should be really cool. That is because the commandment to “bentch” is to thank Hashem for the good land He has given us. The half of the four blessings are all connected to the land. The first is on the food how Hashem provides for all his creations. The second one is for the land he has bequeathed as an inheritance to our forefathers. The third blessing is to have mercy on us and Jerusalem and to rebuild our holy city. And the last one that was established after the Jews were permitted to bury the dead of Beitar who had perished in the last attempt to establish Jewish sovereignty in Israel under the Romans in the Bar Kochva revolt. For millennia our ancestors said these prayers thanking and praying to Hashem each time they ate bread longing and dreaming of Israel. And now we can actually thank Hashem for the good land we are actually living in that he has given us. That my friends, is very cool.

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RABBI SCHWARTZ'S HOT JOKES OF THE WEEK

It's So Hot....... I saw a chicken lay an omelette!!

It's So Hot....... you can wash and dry your clothes at the same time!

It's So Hot....... I saw two trees fighting over a dog!!

It's so hot...the cows are giving evaporated milk.

It’s so Hot I saw a chicken running of to the Shochet (ritual slaughterer) in order to be put in the freezer already.

Best of all- It’s so hot I saw a Yemenite Jew buy a cold drink (Yemenites in Israel are know for their frugalness J)

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Answer is A: This one I found to be fairly easy. I only knew two names Melisinda, who was a Crusader queen about a few hundred years after the Byzantines and Eudocia. Breccia I think is some type of rock and after googling Roxelana I found out she was some type of consort and eventual wife of Suleiman the Magnificent. How I could’ve forgotten that I can’t imagine. Anyways I remembered Eudocia because I recalled that she rebuilt the walls to Jerusalem-the first to do so since Hadrian had destroyed them- based on the verse that it say “Heitiva Birtzoncha es Chomot Yerushalayim. She rebuilt with her desire the walls of Jerusalem”. King David wrote that in Psalms, but she thought it was a prophetic reference to her. She was also pretty good to the Jews, which was not to common back then. And so I remembered her. It also helps that her name rhymes with Sudoku which I like.