Amazing Guests- Parshat Haazinu- Sukkot Edition- 2018 /5779

Insights and Inspiration

from the

Holy Land
from

Rabbi Ephraim Schwartz

"Your friend in Karmiel"

September 21^st 2018 -Volume 8 Issue 49 12^th  Tishrei 5779

Parshat Haazinu/ Sukkot

Amazing Guests

What an amazing people we are, I thought to myself. Is there another nation in the world that could do what we just did. Who else can sit in shul for 10-15 of the last 24 hours pretty much straight through? Add to that, not eating, not drinking, and pretty much not talking either. Yeah there might be some Buddhists up in some mountain in Tibet with a few Jews spiritual seeking Israelis or hippies that might try the whole meditating thing. But it ain’t Yom Kippur. Not only do we do that, I thought to myself, but I actually feel uplifted as a result of it. I looked around my shul, I thought about my yeshiva days, I think about the different communities and strains of Jewish life I have been exposed to and the truth is I find that most of the people in most of the shuls and services I have attended on Yom Kippur actually feel the same way. It’s a real high. The ultimate one perhaps.Neila, when those gates of heavens are closing at the end of the day, there is an indescribable holy energy that is in the synagogue. It’s truly amazing and we are amazing that we can pull through until that point when the holiness explodes, when our bodies are truly recognized as secondary; as mere hosts for the soul and the spark of God that is our truest essence.

 Now, there are of course people in every shul that don’t feel that way. There are people that are checking their watches, critiquing the cantor- wishing they can’t- hear. There are shuls where you just don’t feel that spark. I certainly was one of those guys in shul- many times. I’ve certainly been in shuls and minyanim that didn’t touch me or inspire me at all. I’m sure you have as well. Interestingly at least for me I’ve found that the shuls that have a bit of chasidish spirit, a more alteh heim-feel, speak more to my soul. That hasn’t happened to me though since I started my own shuls and led services. I like the chazan there 😊.  For others I’m sure they can’t imagine not being in their more formal shuls, maybe with a choir. Maybe with the old chazan. Maybe there are certain songs, tunes, liturgical pieces that you need to hear, and if you don’t then your day just isn’t the same. It doesn’t make a difference. You’re there. You’re trying. And ultimately you’re aware that there is a part of you that is trying to move beyond this world. And when it gets there. Its mind-blowing.

 Now there are other Jews that tragically have never had what I believe is the true Yom Kippur experience. Some that are or were at least raised Orthodox, who just were miserable and never moved beyond the minyan their parents sent them to, or the one they had in yeshiva which may have never worked for them. Others who were raised in non-orthodox homes who may have been from the “twice-a-year” Jews and resented the hypocrisy of coming to synagogue and asking forgiveness for sins they had no intention of feeling bad for, or praying to a God they weren’t even sure existed. I’ve met a lot of those types in my wanderings. Tragically I would say they are part of the rapidly disappearing majority of our people; our brothers and sisters who have not found anything meaningful in our 3000 year old heritage, tradition, wisdom and Torah. It’s not a new phenomena in our people. We’ve lost way more to assimilation then to persecution and annihilation. It’s not their fault. I really believe that. They were brought into the wrong Judaism. Their soul never found its path. Perhaps that wasn’t their mission this time around for their soul. If you believe in reincarnation and that our souls can come back multiple times to fulfill and repair different aspects of it purpose, then life or lives might have different objectives, they might be easier, they might not include my Yom Kippur experience. But yet those Jews as well are part of me. They are still part of my family, my nation and ultimately I believe that they will experience it. Every Jewish soul will. Our souls are too amazing not to.

 But what is even more amazing to me then our High Holiday fortitude is our post Yom Kippur activities. See, we have just spent the entire day in prayer. In fact we pretty much have spent the entire past 10 days in prayer and supplications. Sefardim who get up early and say selichos weeks before the Ashkenazim do and guys in yeshiva with regular Elul speeches from their mashgiachhave been in prayer and teshuva mode for a whole month. We just went through Rosh Hashana pretty much spending 20 out of 48 hours in shul davening. We are on major holy Highs. We have been repeatedly asking Hashem non-stop to “Shine His Kingdom and glory to the whole world”. We are on the top of the world.

 So where do you go from there? What do we do the next morning, or even that night? We are not on the top of the world but outside in the backyard on the top of a roof banging nails together and figuring out how to make a Sukkah. We are walking around the market place and looking at palm branches, citrons and counting leaves on myrtle branches. Is there anyone else out there in the world like us? We have gone from the Holy of Holies to the agriculture and construction business and we don’t even blink an eye. We have been doing this for 3000 years and we don’t even think twice about how bizarre it is.. We are like little kids decorating our Sukkah. Hauling branches and making sure its shady enough. Bringing in our fine china, our silverware and our little squeezy honey bear for our challah (I miss those guys by the way here in Israel, if anyone has one send me it). That’s awesome. But what is it all about?

 It struck me today that perhaps what we are doing is beginning construction on that world that we have been asking Hashem for. That world where He will shine out from. Yeah, He has a heavenly palace, a Temple even that will come down and rest on the Temple Mount. First, however He wants to see us build Him a little one in our backyard. Sukkos is the ultimate culmination of all that we have been davening for. We’re building a home where our soul doesn’t have to hide in the basement of our body, right under the bills, the traffic, the noise, the blogs, the news, the carpool and yes even our Torah learning and prayers that may be more mechanical, cultural, social and intellectual rather than something and someplace that It would achieve its proper expression. It’s a place where it, where the real “I” was talking and exploding about during the Neila service. So now we build our soul, we build our truest self that home. It’s made out of wood. Out of branches. Its not too fancy but it glows like my soul does. I put down my smartphone, my car keys, my wallet and I pick up my Lulav and Esrog; a little palm ,a little myrtle, some willows and a citron and I shake them around. This is what surrounds me. This is what I need to be enveloped with. My body is the home of the shechina. My sukka is the House and shade of Hashem. That is where I want to dwell. That is the life I’m looking for.

 There is an interesting custom we have on Sukkos. Every night we invite into our Sukka the 7 heavenly shepherds; Avraham, Yitzchak, Yaakov, Moshe, Aharon, Yosef and Dovid. We don’t do this by any other holiday. We don’t invite them to our Pesach Seder when we have our finest china and Pesach goblets. We don’t invite them to join us for some latkas on Chanukah even though we’ve got plenty of nights for them to come. They’re not there for blintzes on Shavuot when we celebrate the giving of the Torah and not even for hamantashen on Purim and you know we try to find anyone to give those leftover poppy seed ones to. What is about Sukkos that enjoins us to invite them and have them grace us with their presence?

 The Shemen Hatov suggests a profound answer, he says it’s precisely because it’s not our house that we are inviting them to that we know that they will come. We are inviting them to Hashem’s house. To our Sukka, the tzeila dmiheminusa- to those heavenly clouds of glory and faith. To the house that we built for Hashem and our neshomas after finally finding our true selves on Yom Kippur. That is where they are invited to join us. Pesach Shavuot all the other holidays we are in homes that don’t and can’t radiate that holiness. The ushpizin probably won’t feel too comfortable there. They are built for our bodies, our tastes, our neighbours tastes and they house all that is physical about us. After Yom Kippur though our souls are beyond this world and our Sukkah is beyond this world as well. It is our taste of Gan Eden and if we are in Gan Eden then our Patriarchs and the holy ushpizin can certainly feel comfortable to join us. For our souls are joined with them as they our joined with our Creator, our King, our Heavenly Father who we have been so close to.

 It is not only the ushpizin that recall our connection to our shepherds. Each of our 4 species as well connects to them. The three myrtle branches are the Patriarchs, the two willows are Moshe and Aharon, the Lulav is Yosef and the Esrog is Dovid. Just as the we shake those species around ourselves, and many have the custom to do that in the Sukkah, we surround our soul with the souls of our forefathers. We connect with the spheres of holiness and gifts that they gave to us. We move beyond this world and even more fascinating we move beyond the differences that are between each other. He notes that the Torah tells us in the mitzva of Sukka

 Vayikra (23:42)“You shall dwell in Sukkos for 7 days every native/citizen of Israel shall dwell in a Sukkos”

 Seemingly it is a repetitive verse. As well the term every ‘citizen’ or ‘native’ of Israel is meant to dwell in the Sukka. Since when do we refer to Jews by their citizenship? The answer our sages suggest is that we are referring to the ushpizin. They represent the 7 days of Sukkos and they come because in our Sukka we have all become united. We are all one soul. There are Lulavs amongst us, Esrogs, myrtles and willows. Each one of our shepherds are there to make sure that anyone with Jewish citizenship will be connected in that house we built for Hashem. They may not have made it to Yom Kippur. They may not have even found their place in Yiddishkeit. They may just be Jews by citizenship only, but the 7 days Holy ushpizin that come to dwell in our Sukkos are coming with them as well in our Sukkos. For they are also part of our collective Jewish soul. They are also part of revealing Hashem’s Kingdom in this world. They are there as much as Avraham, Yitzchak and Yaakov are there.

  Fascinatingly he notes, that Moshe and Aharon represent the willow branches that have no taste, no flavour. The power of Moshe’s Torah, the unconditional love of Aharon’s clouds of glory gather in those souls as well. We may have never invited those Jews that are not as holy as us into our homes. But you know what? The Sukkah is not our house. It’s Hashems. The ushpizin are there. We are all one. And aren’t we all amazing together in that Sukkah.

 For seven days we will be in those incredible clouds of glory. We will bask in that holiness that we brought down to this world by our little man made huts. We will shake our Lulav branches, we will sing songs with our family and we will remember we came from and where we are meant to bring this world to. May it be the will of Hashem that He brings every Jew into His Sukkah as well. And may His light then finally shine out to the entire world from what will becoming His permanent dwelling place in Yerushalayim

 Have an amazing Shabbos and a otherworldly Sukkos

Rabbi Ephraim Schwartz

  

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The Young Israel of Karmiel would like to invite you to join us this Shabbos for our warm and friendly services. Our Shul is located at 24 HaChavatzelet Street in the Dromi in the Beit Meli building/home.

SHABBOS SCHEDULE

SHABBOS PARSHAT HAAZINU

CANDLELIGHTING- 6:10 PM 

MINCHA & KABBALAT SHABBAT- 6:20 PM

SHACHARIS- 8:30 AM

MINCHA 5:50 PM

MARIV- 7:22 PM (10 minutes after tzeis)

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SUKKOT SCHEDULE 5779

SUNDAY EVENING

CANDLE LIGHTING 6:07  PM

MINCHA-6:20 PM

FOLOWED BY MARIV

MONDAY

SHACHARIS- 8:30 AM

MINCHA 6:00 PM

MAARIV- 7:20  PM

TUESDAY-FRIDAY

SHACHARIS-8:15 PM

SHABBOS CHOL HA'MOED

CANDLELIGHTING- 6:00 PM

MINCHA/KABBALAT SHABBAT- 6:15 PM

SHACHARIS- 8:30 AM-

MINCHA 5:45 PM

MAARIV- 7:13 PM

HOSHANA RABBA/SIMCHAT TORAH -

SUNDAY

SHACHARIS -8:15 PM

CANDLELIGHTING-5:57 PM

MINCHA- 6:10 PM

FOLLOWED BY MARIV AND HAKAFOT

MONDAY SIMCHAT TORAH

SHACHARIS-8:30 AM

MINCHA AFTER HAKAFOT AND MUSAF

MAARIV- 7:10 PM

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RABBI SCHWARTZ’S FAVORITE YIDDISH PROVERB OF THE WEEK

“Mit a guten gast frait men zikh ven er kumt arein; mit a shlechten gast, ven er gait avek...”– With a good guest, you are happy when he arrives; with a bad one, when he leaves.

RABBI SCHWARTZ'S TOUR GUIDE EXAM QUESTION OF THE WEEK

answer below at end of Email

Q A kibbutz in the region of Judea and Samaria:

A. Ofra

B. Kfar Etzion

C. Tirzah

D. Tapuach

RABBI SCHWARTZ COOL VIDEOS OF THE WEEK

https://youtu.be/NPIPrQAtIz4- Greatest scene from Ushpizin movie The power of prayer. Must watch (really should rent and watch entire movie but if you don’t have time at least this scene)

https://soundcloud.com/ephraim-schwartz/ushpizin-2- My Ushpizin song composition- the nicest song you’ll hear this Yom Tov. If I had one song I composed that I would want out there- this would be it… After all how many times can you sing vsamachta

https://youtu.be/FNAG8nhF7vo- A movinng Tribute to the Lion Ari Fuld who was cut down to early by an arab terrorist this past week. May Hashem avenge His blood.

https://youtu.be/B2W-8Ea835s  - Sukkas Falling? I don’t know what I just watched hmmmmm

RABBI SCHWARTZ'S HAFTORA CONNECTION OF THE WEEK

Parshat Haazinu – I believe that not only is the haftorah connected to each parsha but the prophet that is chosen for that haftora as well has a connection to the Parsha. So certainly Yeshaya and Yirmiyahu have connections to many parshiyot. Yet when we have a prophet that doesn’t show up to often is when we can really note that. This week our haftora to the portion of Haazinu, the “song of the Torah” is only appropriate to be connected to the prophecy of the Noam Zemirot of Klal Yisrael- the great singer and composer Dovid Hamelech.

The song of Haazinu is not 99 bottles of beer, or row row row your boat or even twinkle little star. It is complex. It discusses Hashems’ kindness to us. It describes us forgetting him and the wrath Hashem pours upon us and ultimately it describes His mercy and revelation to the world. Dovid is a microcosm of the Jewish people. I don’t think it is a coincidence that Haazinu is chapter 32 gematria lev- heart. .Dovid  is our heart. He is our Esrog. In the prophecy which is mostly repeated in his psalms.. he traces those themes as well.

He is purused by Shaul, he is chased by enemies from within and without, Yet in it all he realizes

Shmuel (22:2) God is my rock, my shelter, my refuge

Just as in our parsha Hashem tells us that He is

Devarim (32:4) Hatzur Tamim Pa’aalo- Our Rock, perfect in his actions

The song of Haazinu describes all of the tribulations as ultimately coming to that great revelation of Hashem telling us

Devarim (32:40) “For I raise up My hand to heaven, and say, 'As I live forever..

Ibid (22:47-50) “Chai Hashem UVaruch Tzuri-The Eternal lives! Praised be my Rock! God is exalted…so I thank You, Eternal One, among the nations, and sing praises to Your name”

The Haftorah concludes with the words that we conclude our bentching with

Ibid (22:51) Migdol Yeshuos malko voseh chesed lmeshicho LDovid U’Lzaro ad olam- Hashem gives great salvation to His king, and He performs kindness to His anointed; to David and to his seed, forevermore.

We will be reciting those words as we bentch the entire week in our sukka. As we sit in the shade of Hashem. Let them inspire us of the kindness that Hashem has given us the descendants of Dovid and may we merit to see His Mashiach soon, god willing this year!

RABBI SCHWARTZ'S ERA’S AND THEIR PLACES AND PEOPLE IN ISRAEL OF THE WEEK

Clouds of Glory and Sukkos- 960 BC  40 years is a long time to be wandering around the wilderness. My tourists have generally had enough after an hour or two. Yet the Jewish people, the Torah tells us had a different experience. They had clouds of glory we are told that surrounded and protected them. They provided protection from the arrow and spears of our enemies. They knocked out and cleared the road of all the obstacles that stood before them. They provided the perfect climate control AC conditions. As well it also served as the dry cleaner, as their clothing never wore out. I have had a bunch of tourists that would have loved to travel under those conditions. Each year we go out in our Sukkos and we remember and commemorate the miracle and that feeling that we were driving for forty years in that heavenly limo of the clouds of glory.

I try to connect my tourists to those clouds of glory whenever we go hiking through the Judean Desert, or in the Negev by Mibdar Tzin where the Jews actually wandered and I point out to them how much nicer it would be if we had those heavenly clouds right then. As well and perhaps even more poignantly when I drive near the borders in the North of Israel in Galil or the Golan or even more so in the South near Gaza, by Sderot, I talk about the miraculous clouds of glory that surround our country. How our enemies throw missile after missile at us and they seem for the most part to fall in empty fields. To land on arab villages and this is even without the iron dome. Our war in Gaza in 2012 was called amud anan- the pillar of cloud or in English Pillar of defence. Missiles in that war hit as far as Tel Aviv for the first time from Gaza, but once again of the almost 1500 rockets that were shot at us only one direct hit caused loss of life in Kiryat Malachi and over 1100 fell in either Gaza or open areas. Yes, the clouds of glory are still here today.

In regards to how we celebrate those clouds, so there are a few places where one can really appreciate the incredible Sukkos that we erect this holiday in commemoration of those miracles. In Neot Kedumim they have tens of sukkos that are there that are all mentioned in the Mishna, on  a camel, a boat, double decker on a tree. It’s very cool. In Jerusalem you have the Safra square Sukka the largest one in Israel that has over 100,000 visitors over sukkot and is over 1000 square meters. The Waldorf Astoria one in the lobby is also exquisite as it seats over 250 people in the middle of the hotel dining room. Belz has all kinds of incredible displays  in their sukkah as well from what I understand. The President of Israel even invites children from all over the country to decorate his Sukka and thousands visit them. It is amazing to live in this country and to walk around neighbourhood to neighbourhood and to see each house, each shul, each nature reserve, restaurants historical sites, each block remembers that miracle that Hashem did for us then as he did to us today as He envelops us in His Sukkah of peace.

RABBI SCHWARTZ’S GUEST JOKES  OF THE WEEK

Rabbi Bloom was in the park one Sunday when he meets three members of his Synagogue who have not attended services in some time. They are a little embarrassed but he encourages them to come to shull. Next Shabbos they make an appearance, but because they turn up some time after service began, all the main seats are filled. Several other latecomers were already seated on folding chairs. 
Rabbi Bloom calls over the Shammas. "Moishe, please get three chairs for our guests in the back." 
Moishe is a bit deaf so he leans closer and says, "I beg your pardon, Rabbi?" 
Rabbi Bloom again says, "Get three chairs for our guests in the back." 
Moishe was puzzled but as there was a lull in the service, he goes to the front of the shull and loudly announces, "The Rabbi says, 'Give three cheers for our pests in the back!'" 
A Gabbai approaches a guest in the shul and says,"I want to give you an Aliyah. What is your name?" The man answers, "Esther ben Moshe." 
The Gabbai says, "No, I need your name." 
"It's Esther ben Moshe," the man says. 
"How can that be your name?" 
The man answers,"I've been having financial problems,so everything is in my wife's name."
Rabbi Cohen was invited as one of the religious leaders of the community to be a guest at the community civic dinner. The main course much to his chagrin was baked ham with glazed sweet potatoes. Rabbi Cohen regretfully shook his head when the platter was passed to him. 
 "When," scolded Father Kelly, the local catholic priest playfully, "are you going to forget that silly rule of yours and eat ham like the rest of us guests here?" 
 Without skipping a beat, Rabbi Cohen replied "At your wedding reception, Father Kelly." 
It was at a typical Jerusalem party and the hosts Moishie and Shaindy was getting worried because there were too many people and not enough refreshments. She was sure that not all of these people had been invited but didn’t know how to tell which ones were the crashers. Then Moishie got an idea….
He turned to the crowd of guests and said “Will those who are from the brides side of the family stand up please?” About twenty people stood.Then he asked ” Will those who are from the groom side of the family stand up as well?” about twenty five people stood up. Then He smiled and said
“Will all those who stood please leave, this is a birthday party”.
 Berel was down on his luck, went into a the local synagogue which catered to the "bessereh mentchen- the elite of the community". Spotting the man's dirty clothes the president worried about the synagogues image, went to the man and asked him if he needed help. The man said, "I was davening and Hashem told me to come to this Shul."
The president suggested that he go pray some more and possibly he might get a different answer. The next Shabbos Berel returned. The president asked, "Did you get a different answer?"
Berel replied, "Yes I did. I told Hashem that they don't want me in that shul and Hashem said,'Don't worry about it son; I've been trying to get into that synagogue for years and haven't made it yet."

Yankel was walking down the street when he was accosted by a particularly dirty and shabby-looking homeless man who asked him for a couple of dollars for dinner. The man took out his wallet, extracted ten dollars and asked, "If I give you this money, will you buy some beer with it instead of dinner?"
"No, I had to stop drinking years ago," the homeless man replied.
"Will you use it to go fishing instead of buying food?" the man asked.
"No, I don't waste time fishing," the homeless man said. "I need to spend all my time trying to stay alive."
"Will you spend this on greens fees at a golf course instead of food?" the man asked.
"Are you NUTS!" replied the homeless man. "I haven't played golf in 20 years!"
"Well," said the man, "I'm not going to give you the money. Instead, I'm going to take you home for a terrific dinner cooked by my wife."
The homeless man was astounded. "Won't your wife be furious with you for doing that? I know I'm dirty, and I probably smell pretty disgusting."
The man replied, "That's okay. It's important for her to see what a man looks like after he has given up beer, fishing and golf,.
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Answer is B–  Easy. Kfar Etzion is a kibbutz, a famous one perhaps most tragically for the massacre of its Jewish kibbutznik settlers the Friday morning the State of Israel was declared. Once I knew that it didn’t matter that I never heard of Tirtza, which is just an ancient city or Ofra or Kfar Tapuach which are both West Bank Settlements but not Kibbutzim. Although I wasn’t sure about that. Once you know the right answer no need to search for alternatives. A good and profound lesson for life.

Goat to Zell- Parshat Vayelech-Yom Kippur edition 2018 / 5779

Insights and Inspiration

from the

Holy Land
from

Rabbi Ephraim Schwartz

"Your friend in Karmiel"

September 14^th 2018 -Volume 8 Issue 47 5^th  Tishrei 5779!!!

Parshat Vayelech/ Yom Kippur

Goat to Zell

(what a terrible title)

Jewish phrases have meaning and depth. I’m not just talking about the words of our sages and prophets, I’m talking about the average Yankel and Berel. Their slang, their vernacular has depth and meaning and is many times rooted in deep tradition and wisdom. Our sages tell us that when in doubt about something go check out what the “amcha” – the regular guy on the street has to say or does. The collective wisdom of the Jewish people “if they are not prophets they are sons of prophets.” It’s why I like to add the Yiddish quote of the week in  my E-Mail. When I write those pearls of wisdom, I hear the amcha, I hear the genius and perhaps even the prophecy of our people in their simple day to day phrases.

Now I don’t know how far you can take this thing. But I’ve always liked to push the line and there is no greater “amcha” then your typical Israeli on the street. The wagon drivers, water carriers and peddlers of old are the modern day taxi drivers, barkeeps and guys that sell stuff in the shuk. Now the eengleesh words that they tranzleeterrchrait here don’t count of course, like logeestika, or mahnumentalit, or autobooz. I’m talking about the Israeli words that have depth to them. It’s before Yom Kippur so there’s one in particular that sticks out. I heard it first when I got into an argument with an Israeli that I was upset about for not doing what he had told me he was supposed to do and I refused to pay him therefore in full. I was more than happy to pay him for what he did. Just not for what he didn’t. He for some reason didn’t understand that logic. And after a few minutes of elevated discussion when he realized that I had lived here a few months already and was no longer a freiyer- another great Israeli word for sucker, but literally means a “free person” imaginably someone who pays for free things. He then told me quite agitatedly

“Lech La’Azazel- go to Azazel”

Now in America I am familiar with a different place they would tell people you were upset with to go to. It ended with double hockey sticks and kind of rhymes with Azazel. But I guess here in Israel as frustrated as you might be with someone you would never ever tell them to down there. So we came up with an alternate place for people you were upset with to go to. A biblical place certainly and in fact a place I visit quite often with my tourists in the Judean desert; Azazel mountain. For those that fall asleep during the lengthy part of the Yom Kippur service and missed the Torah portion of Acharey Mot that we read on that day as well- hey, it’s a long service I sympathize with you and I’m here to give you the short version. Ok maybe not that short… but it’s not nearly as many pages as your prayer book. Anyways it’s the tallest mountain in the Desert,, about 12 km from Jerusalem that the Kohen would one of the twin goats that were chosen by lottery to the cliff and chuck it and all the sins of the Jewish people off the mountain. Meanwhile his twin brother was taken as an offering in the Holy Temple. When the scapegoat, yes that’s another one of those Jewish terms we coined, was thrown off the mountain and atonement was achieved the red string hanging in the temple would miraculously turn to white and it would be a sign all our sins had been forgiven. So that’s where the guy was telling me to go. Hmmm strange.. is he telling me to jump off a cliff? Is he saying I need atonement?

Now being interested in this phrase I researched its advent into the lingua franca or hebraica of the country. As it seems that a lot of people are being told to go there. It’s actually a pretty cool story. It seems the first time the phrase was coined was in 1927 by none other a great Yiddish speaker and enthusiast Chaim Nachman Bialik was walking down the street in Tel Aviv speaking to his friend in Yiddish. He was accosted by Aharon Nachmani, a young and zealous member of the Battalion for the Defence of the Language, a group dedicated to policing the exclusive use of Hebrew among Palestine Jews. Can you imagine if they had a organization like that today? We would be in serious trouble. But for that matter so would many peetza and amboorger eating Izraelees. So he approached Bialik and shouted “Bialik, speak Hebrew!” to which the annoyed Bialik responded, “Lech le'azazel!”

This could have been the end of the story, but Nachmani went to court and sued Bialik for insulting him. In his defence, Bialik wrote:

“It is possible that the word is a bit harsh according to its regular use in the marketplace, but according to its accurate and real meaning, it is a name of a mountain in the desert, not far from Jerusalem a two-three hour walk in the Judean Desert. And this place, in my opinion, is pretty dignified place for that man to take a walk in.”

 Nachmani withdrew his lawsuit and was charged 180 prutot in court fees. I wonder if he appreciated the irony of paying 10 times chai to Azazel.

Now what it this sacrifice and ritual really about. It definitely should rank up there with some of the more bizarre ones in our tradition to our western mindset worldview. And we’ve got a lot of competition for that title. Listen to the clip of the Country Yossi ‘Cuz I’m a Jew’ to hear all of those in the running. The commentaries have a field day trying to figure it out. The Ibn Ezra cryptically says that whoever understands the secret of 33 will find the answer. Now I know Baskin Robbins 31 flavours. What’s 33?

The Ramban explains the 33 secret by explaining that if one counts 33 verses from the verse that talks about the Azazel you arrive at the pasuk

Vayikra (17:7) And they shall no longer slaughter their sacrifices to the se’irim-demons after which they stray. This shall be an eternal statute for them, for [all] their

generations.

The word for demons, sei’rim is also the word for goats, and there you have it. It seems that the Jews worshipped idols with goats, so to rectify that Hashem commands us to take that goat and chuck it off the mountain, thus taking our former idolatry and turning it into a mitzva. This is a secret and although I’m 33 for like 15 years or so now, it doesn’t really speak to me. I was never into idolatry and although I haven’t really eaten goat steaks, I’ve heard their pretty good and wouldn’t waste any on any demons. As well I have a hard time finding an eternal message for all generations that makes this the pinnacle of our Yom Kippur service.

Rav Hirsch and Rav Dessler see in the word Azazel two words. Az is strength and azal means to move. We use the strength of our opponents against them. The Satan comes to us with our desires and we are meant to take those desires and move with them. Like good food, eat it on Shabbos and holidays. Like to talk a lot-  speak Torah, write an endless weekly E-mail. Like money and nice things make your mitzvos beautiful, make sure the poor have as much enjoyment as you do. A nice concept as well. We use that desire for idolatry for atonement in the service of Hashem as commanded. But still how is this an atonement for all sins.

Other commentaries note that the two identical twin goats represent Yaakov and Esau. Each one until 13 were on the same track. Then Yaakov chose life, Torah, holiness and spirituality, Esau went out to the fields. The symbolism of Azazel is Hashem choosing us over him. Imagine the goats mindset. The one going to the Temple thinks he’s in trouble. He sees dead animals all over. The temple was a slaughterhouse. The other goat thinks he’s off the hook. He’s going for a nice quiet walk in desert. He strokes his billy goat beard and breathes in the beautiful air of this world, checks out the view from that highest peak and laughs about the fate of his brother that was “chosen”.   I guess he got the short straw. What bad luck. Then… boom. Bye Bye Billy goat. This world and all its sins are temporary. It’s all downhill when you leave the Temple. The goat in the Temple though becomes eternal. Becomes uplifted. He is one with Hashem.

Reb Meir Simcha of Dvinsk though perhaps shares one of the more original ideas about this sacrifice. He suggests that we have two major sins at the founding of us as a nation that are the cause of all of our troubles. The sin of the Golden Calf, when 40 days after receiving the Torah we were dancing around worshipping idols. That sin represents essence of all sins between Man and God. There is as well the sin of the brothers selling Yosef to Egypt. sinat chinam- baseless hatred, this is the core of all sins between man and his fellow man. By Yosef we dipped his coat in the blood of a goat. He points out as well that the string that was tied in horns of the goat weighed two selaim- which is the same amount of weight that the material for Yosef’s coloured garment over his brother weighed. Cool!

In the case of the golden calf the Torah tells us when Aharon dedicated the Mishkan Hashem tells us Aharon

Vayikra (9:20) And say to Aharon that he should take a calf the son of a bull as a sin offering.. and to the children of Israel tell them saying they should take a goat for a sin offering.

The midrash notes that Aharon was nervous about coming into the Temple because of the sin of the golden calf and Hashem tells him to bring the calf to atone and that the Jewish people would bring a goat. And so there you have the two goats.

He, as well, notes that’s why the two goats atonement had to take place in different places. The one that was offered to Hashem for the sin of the golden calf and thus all sins between man and Hashem was brought in the courtyard heichal of the Temple and the Holy of Holies which is the portions of the tribe of Yehudah and the mainly in the tribe of Binyamin. The children of Leah and Rachel. We all sinned by the golden calf. We all need atonement for our sins between us and Hashem. The other goat which atones for the sin of the selling of Yosef and for our sins between our fellow man, can’t take place in the Temple in the portion of Binyamin. He was the only tribe that wasn’t a party to that sin. It was Yehuda that was the ringleader. It is therefore taken out to the Midbar Yehuda. It is thrown off the mountain as that symbolizes the throwing of Yosef into the pit. The throwing off of our ego that is on the highest mountain and that is the root of all of our fights with our friends. We think we know better. We think we are right. He dissed ME. I’m the king. I’m the leader. I should be the favoured son. I deserve all the coloured coats. We chuck that ego off the mountain and poof we are atoned. We are free of the worst baggage that we have. Our pride, our ego, and our relentless narcissistic behaviour that brings us down.

What is most fascinating and meaningful to me about going to Azazel, is that the goat of Azazel and the goat of the temple are identical. One is not more important than the other. Our sins between our fellow person and our sins between us and our Creator are the same. They are two sides of the two tablets. Reb  Yitzchak Kamarna notes that the verse

V’ahavta Es Hashem Elokecha-and you shall love Hashem our God and Vahavta Lirayacha Kamocha Ani Hashem – and you shall love your friend like yourself I am Hashem are both in gematria identical (907) . Like the two goats. identical.

 We need forgiveness for both. We need to get to the core of them both. We can’t bury them anymore. We can’t just focus on one. We can’t just be all about God and Torah and mitzvos and forget our obligations to our friends. We need to be menschen. At the same time being a mench is not enough. We need to connect with our Creator. We need to reveal His Presence to the world. We need to follow his direction of life for us. We need to bring heaven to earth and connect with eternity. We need to lech la’azazel to get our atonement. We need to bury pride. We need to come with humility. We need to want to be forgiven.

At this time of year, as every year, I wish to aske forgiveness from all of you. I don’t express my appreciation to you enough. You and your reading fill me with inspiration each week and force me to focus, read, learn and grow. Thank you. Especially those of you that even occasionally give me feedback and particularly constructive criticism. That’s more important and appreciated then the occasional LOL’s and accolades some of you sometime share with me. As well I want to ask forgiveness if I offended you ever, if I quoted or made up stuff that wasn’t true or misquoted. I have. And most of all I wish to bless all of you that all of us should merit to have all of our sins thrown to Azazel, may we be uplifted in the holiest of way with the Temple rebuilt and may we blessed with a Gmar Chatima Tova.

Have a holy Shabbos of Return and a Gmar Chatima Tova

Rabbi Ephraim Schwartz

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RABBI SCHWARTZ’S FAVORITE YIDDISH PROVERB OF THE WEEK

“Der gehenem iz nit azoi shlecht vi dos kumen tsi im..”– Gehenom is not as bad as the way coming to it.

RABBI SCHWARTZ'S TOUR GUIDE EXAM QUESTION OF THE WEEK

answer below at end of Email

Q A ruler who destroyed fortresses from the 5^th Crusade:

A. Baibars

B. al Hakim bi Amar Allah

C. Dar el Omar

D. al Malik al Mu’azzam Isa

RABBI SCHWARTZ COOL VIDEOS OF THE WEEK

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y0KjxPhW_8g- Classic Country Yossi “Cuz I’m a Jew”

https://youtu.be/WgCMi9MnVgY- Whats Shabbos Shuva without Reb Shlomo Carlebach Return Again

https://youtu.be/WpV4MVHKkSg- Gornisht- a interesting song by Eliezer Brodt

https://youtu.be/rTWhtUIv9t0  - I love this new moving song of Baruch Levine- Kivisi

 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FfsmLgD2ZFM – Funny Goat videos

RABBI SCHWARTZ'S HAFTORA CONNECTION OF THE WEEK

Parshat Vayelech – I find that most haftoras are the part of davening when we doze off, or perhaps in some finer shuls the “the boys” head our for kiddush club. Generally most people (myself included) have a difficult enough time sitting through davening and Torah reading, but haftora, the tune, the words of the prophet that were usually in flowery poetic and repetitive language would put me to sleep. Yet there were a few haftorahs that I would be up for. That I think everyone is. That people know the first few pesukim  and many of the other ones. They call to us. We are awake and they’re pretty short too 😊. Shabbos Shuva is one of those.

Who doesn’t know the first words of the prophet

Hoshea (14:2) Shuva Yisrael ad Hashem Elokecha ki kashalta b’avonecha-return Israel to your God for you have stumbled in your iniquity.

After 7 weeks of Yeshaya’s comforting us we have come to the “the best of” list of three prophets Hoshea, Micha and Yoel, just a few verses from each of these prophets but each one of the verses are classic parts of our texts, our prayers and our liturgy as they encompass the core of what all our prayers are about.

Ibid (14:3) Vnishalma parim sifaseinu- and we should pay back or complete our “cows” (for sacrifices) with our lips.

Hashem doesn’t need our sacrifices, He wants our hearts. Our love and he waits for us to return.

He even mentions my name

(14:9) Ephraim; What more do I need the graven images? I will answer him and I will look upon him: I am like a leafy cypress tree; from Me your fruit is found.

The whole service of tashlich can be found in the words of Micha in his image which became Jewish ritual of

Micha (7:8) Cast in the depths of the sea all your sins

The conclusion of Yoel is really the essence of these days Rosh Hashana, Yom Kippur, Sukkos

Yoel (2:15) Blow the shofar in Zion, sanctify a fast, call a solemn assembly;

The final words is our hope and prayer for the redemption for the time when all is forgiven and when Hashem promises to restore the land and make up for all those years we have been apart.

Ibid(2:27) And you shall know that I am in the midst of Israel, and that I am Hashem your God, and there is none else; and My people shall never be ashamed. 

Micha the prophet (758-742nBC)-  Little is known about the personal life of the prophet Micah. He came from a town called Moreshet, and was therefore called Morashti. He lived during the reign of king Jotham of Judah, and succeeding kings, about 150 years before the destruction of Jerusalem by the Babylonians. In this time, as often before him and after him, the people of both Judah and of the Northern Kingdom, had abandoned the ways of G‑d. Jerusalem and Samaria, the capitals of the two Jewish kingdoms, were centers of idol worship and bad living. The rich oppressed the poor, and the laws of the Torah were rejected.

Fearlessly, as the prophecy of G‑d rested on him, Micah came out to denounce the evils that had filled his beloved land. He warned that Samaria and Jerusalem would be destroyed. The prophecy about Samaria was fulfilled only a short time later, less than a quarter of a century; it was destroyed by Shalmaneser, king of Assyria, in the year 3205 (after Creation). Jerusalem existed for another 133 years, and was destroyed until it was destroyed.

RABBI SCHWARTZ'S ERA’S AND THEIR PLACES AND PEOPLE IN ISRAEL OF THE WEEK

Yom Kippur sacrifice- 960 BC – A little pause from our chronological historical sites and era for the upcoming holiday of Yom Kippur. This holiday has certainly transformed and/or e -or de-volved since it was once practiced in the Temple and I try to share that concept with my tourists, perhaps giving them an extra reason to long for the return of the Temple. See in the Temple times the Talmud tells us this was the happiest day of the year. No one sat in synagogue all day with a prayer book counting pages. They didn’t even have prayer books back then.

Rather it was a day when the Jewish people gathered in the Temple and stood in awe of the Almighty. They watched the High Priest/Kohen Gadol in all his holy clothing preform the service. They heard him recite the explicit name of Hashem numerous times as he asked for forgiveness and blessed them. All eyes were turned to a hanging red string that symbolized our iniquities as they waited for it to change colour to white. Then they would go out to the fields and vineyards and dance and the young men would meet the young woman and it would be a major shidduch matchmaking scene. Perhaps something to consider to solve the current shidduch crisis? Yes it was certainly different back then.

I like to mention this idea to my tourists. I enjoy pointing out paradigm shifting things about the way that we observe our Judaism and how it differed back then. As well its cool to be able to connect what the Torah and our sages tell us about our history and rituals with seeing and imagining the scenes and places these took place. So obviously the best place to talk about this is from Mt. Azazel itself or Jabel Muntar as its pronounced in Arabic. The mountain which is the highest in the Judean desert and about 12 Km from Jerusalem, as described by chazal was the site of non-Jewish worship after the Temple was destroyed and one can still see remains of Mosaic rock there. It’s amazing to stand there and look over to Yerushalyim and Temple Mount with next to the very visible Mt. of Olives and Har Tzofim and appreciate the path the Kohen took to get here with the scapegoat-literally.

Of course as well I like to speak about the tons of Bedouin goats that are in the area and sometimes even like to stop and show them a few. Finally I like to point out the Yom Kippur festival as we drive through the hills of Yerushalayim and we pass the vineyards.

Just as we have seen the prophecies of this once desolate area rebuilt and flourished may we soon merit to see the Yom Kippur restored to its original glory.

RABBI SCHWARTZ’S REALLY TERRIBLE YOM KIPPUR AND GOAT JOKES  OF THE WEEK

What do you call a goat with a beard?
It is goatee!

Why is it hard to carryon a conversation with a goat?
Because they are always butting in.

What do you call a goat on a mountain?
Hillbilly.

Doctor, Doctor I feel like a goat".
"How long have you felt like that"?
..... "Since I was a kid".

Why did the ram run over the cliff?
Answer: ...He didn't see the ewe turn.

What kind of music do goats listen to?
…...Baaa-ch!

What do you call a goat dressed like a clown? A silly billy. 

Rabbi to congregant:"Yes I understand that Burger Bar has a kashrut certificate and that they call it "fast" food......but you still can't eat it on Yom Kippur!"

A Jewish painter once went to speak privately with his rabbi shortly in Elul, the month that precedes the High Holy days. He confided in him that he had done dreadful things professionally: he had used poor quality paint and lied about it; he had not prepared the surfaces properly and lied about it; and had thinned his paint with turpentine. He asked what he could do to atone. Responded his rabbi:

"Repaint. Repaint, and thin no more."

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Answer is D–  This one was a coin toss for me. I got it wrong. I was never good with Arab names. They’re all Muhammed or Ali or Abu something or other, and knowing that no one that I would ever take on a tour would ever really care, I deleted all that information from my brain the second I passed the exam in order to leave room fro far more important information like where the best mehadrin restaraunts might be. It was a coin toss because I deleted two from the list right away. See Baibars was the Mamaluk guy from Egypt that wiped out Louis IX yemach shemo (may his wicked name be obliterated-He was the guy that massacred Jews and burned all of the Talmuds in Paris and who St. Louis is named after) and that was the 7^th Crusade about 50 years after the 5^th Crusade. Dahr Al Omar as well was in the 1700’s during the Ottaman period and was the ruler of Akko, he rebuilt on top of the Crusader city. I know that because I tour Akko a lot. So it left El Malik and El Hakim. Do you even care which one? I guessed Hakim. I was wrong Hakim was before the first Crusade and Malik was the man. I’m not losing any sleep or tourists over my failure to know that one.