Lepers, Lambs and Liberation- Parshat Metzora Shabbat Ha'Gadol PESACH EDITION

 

Insights and Inspiration

from the

Holy Land

from

Rabbi Ephraim Schwartz

"Your friend in Karmiel"

April 19^th 2024 -Volume 13 Issue 28 11^th of Nisan 5784

Parshat Metzora -HaGadol

Lepers, Lambs and Liberation

Ten Plagues. Yup, ten of them. That’s what Egypt got as payback. Each one of the plagues, the various commentaries reveal, correspond to what they did to us. Our sages tell us it’s mida kneged mida- or quid pro quo. If you haven’t heard that before, you haven’t been by a real seder.

Frankly, by that point of the Seder, though, most people are just ready for the meal and are looking at the clock wondering if they’ll have enough time to eat that Afikoman before midnight or not. So perhaps one of the most important aspects of the Seder, discussing and figuring out how that all worked has pretty much just gotten down to dipping your finger in the cup of wine (licking it of course, because you’re really thirsty), and maybe having some fun throwing some toy animals around the table-if you’re creative and bought those “seder sets” that you just feel you have to use to keep your kids engaged and thought would be really cute and entertaining. Frankly though they just want to get to the afikoman present already. They said their Ma Nishtana, leave me alone. When do we eat?

 Recognizing this reality and in order that we don’t miss out on this important aspect of the Seder, we have a custom to prepare the Hagadda the Shabbos beforehand. That’s this week in case you forgot and were too busy dodging missiles to remember. Yet, as we say in the Vehi She’amda song, and throughout the entire Seder, it’s not just a recounting of the story of our Exodus. That’s for simple Jews, or as the Rambam fascinatingly says for children or the mentally challenged. The mitzva is to tell about the miracles. It’s about our Exodus in 2024. It’s today, not just then.

 Well this year, the year of our redemption, it’s time to do it really right. Let’s talk about the plagues that we suffered through this past year from our enemies. From Hamas. From Amalek. From those that stand up each generation and in this final generation to persecute and try to destroy us. We don’t need to tell Holocaust stories at the Seder this year. We have October 7^th. We have Simchas Torah 5784. Let’s talk about the ten plagues we suffered on that day and since then. And then let’s talk about how Hashem will pay them back for it and perhaps even what this entire process of redemption that is always preceded by these tzoris and the parsha we read of tzora’as is really all about.

So from the beginning. Blood. Yes, we had lots of it that was spilled on that day. Yes, they killed our babies. In their chant and on their pursuit of the river to the sea they echoed what our sages tell us Pharaoh’s mantra was. “Li ye’ori v’ani asiteev- The river is mine- I made it. Umm reality check Pharaoh… It’s not yours.  You weren’t even around when the world was created. Same for you Hamas. There was no such thing as a Palestinian when the State was founded. Hashem was here long before Pharaoh and the Jews were in Israel long before Hamas. But they didn’t care. They spilled our blood. And so Hashem needs to spill theirs.

 Tzfardeya- frogs. It’s interesting the word tzfardaya comes from the word tzfira- sirens. Noise. The plague of the frogs was primarily about the unbearable croaking and shrieking of the frogs that rang out wherever they went. Well, we had our sirens that morning with their missiles. Again and again, like there never was in the history of our country. Just as back then there was never so much noise. It was terrifying. People that were here and lived through it are still suffering trauma from those sirens and many still stay evacuated in places where there won’t be subject to those deafening alerts. They shudder whenever they hear one as it returns them to that unforgettable horrible morning when everything changed for them forever. It takes them back to “Egypt”.

 Lice. They came up from the ground. From tunnels. That’s what these maggots do. That’s where they took our hostages. Burrowed in the ground that we thought was oh so safe and secure. Yaakov didn’t want to be buried in Egypt because he saw, the midrash tells us that we would have to roll through tunnels to be resurrected by techiyat ha’meisim and those tunnels would be infested with lice. Do you think he saw perhaps these tunnels as well? These maggots. The tunnels we have to go through for techiyat hameisim?

 Arov- a wild multitude charged into our country. They terrorized our homes, our kibbutzim, our farms, our cities. They tore us apart. They raped, they pillaged, they wreaked havoc. It wasn’t even that they were hungry or about food. It was just to terrorize. It was just to impart fear and to murder. Yeah, that plague is not a far stretch.

 Dever- Pestilence. They woke up that morning and all their animals were dead in the field. Their horses, their donkeys, their cattle. The one image too many Zaaka members told me about that morning that they can’t get out of their heads, and perhaps one of the most powerful places that I have brought people to on my Chizuk missions is the so many burnt cars that lined the roads of highway 232- the highway of death. Our “horses” our “donkeys” were all dead in the fields. The smell of death, the bullet-ridden 1000 or more cars, cars that until that day were our means of going to family get togethers, to go to work in our fields, to celebrate the holiday. Those are all now symbols and monuments of the plague that they laid upon us.

Shechin- boils. The sky was filled with smoke and ash. The fires they set. They families they burnt alive. The boils and burns in our hearts and souls that will never go away. So much fire. So much smoke, so many burns, bullets, searing wounds we suffered from the whips they laid upon us in Egypt… and since October 7^th.

 Hail- Firey brimstone reigned down on our homes that morning. The sky was lit up that morning in the non-stop barrage. Fascinatingly enough this plague started beforehand when the Egyptians were warned it was coming and they were told that they need to bring their animals into their homes to protect them. Their homes became shelters. Bomb shelters from the barrage. They were holed up there just as we were on that morning, cramped in small rooms with whatever possessions they had while terror and fire hailed down outside destroying everything that they didn’t manage to bring in with them. Hashem made the Egyptians suffer that morning and learn to fear Hashem. And we suffered as well that morning learning that same lesson.

 Arbeh- the sky was black. It was swarming. The locusts looted and ate and stole anything that remained. They controlled the skies, the fields and they pillaged like a dark cloud. More and more and more. Arbeh. They just kept coming. Like a big dark black cloud that blocked out the heavens. That hid Hashem from us.

 Choshech- and then the darkness fell. We were immobilized. We were in shock. We couldn’t see our brothers. We didn’t know what happened to them. Where they were taken. Were they alive or dead? Were they in a tunnel somewhere in a cold deep dark dungeon? Are they still there?

 Nine plagues down. We’re almost there. We’re almost redeemed. The geula is coming. It is Rosh Chodesh Nisan and Hashem tells us that we need to get ready. There is one plague left. Then we will be born as a nation. The preparation that we need to do is the Korban Pesach. We need to take a lamb and tie it to our bed and then slaughter it. We need to roast it whole. We need to have blood on our doorposts for that fateful night of the Seder. For we will be exiting that bloody doorway- that mashkof- that we look at as we enter the new world. The world where Hashem smites our enemies Himself. The world where we are born as a nation as His “Firstborn”, His chosen ones.

 Now I want to share with you a fascinating idea that incredibly connects with this scene and this imagery. Something I never appreciated before, but because of the way that Hashem orchestrated our Torah reading this year where Shabbat Ha’Gadol falls out on Parshat Metzora hit me like a ton of bricks. See, this scene and the many of the words that connect with it are all found in this week’s Parsha that discusses what seems to be the strange and certainly unique process of the purification of the Metzora. Which of course non-coincidentally is the only other place until now since the ten plagues where the Torah utilizes the word nega- blemish or in Pharoh’s case before the last plague, Hashem tells us

Od nega echad avi al Pharaoh V’Mitzryaim- one more plague/blemish I will bring upon Pharaoh and Egypt.

 Now what is the process of this purification? Fascinatingly, Rabbi Dovid Fohrman points out, it contains almost all the elements of the Korban Pesach. In both cases we are told that a hyssop brush and wood are dipped in blood. In Egypt it is dipped there and put upon the wooden doorposts, while by the Metzora the blood it is sprinkled on the metzora himself. By the Metzora two birds are taken and one is slaughtered while the other is “sent free” in the field after being dipped in the slaughtered blood of the first bird. In Egypt our firstborns are saved, and we are born as a nation when we are “sent free” into the wilderness, while theirs are slaughtered.

 Even more fascinating is that we are told that the blood of the slaughtered bird is poured over a pail of water, from where the other bird is set free. Isn’t it amazing that as well our final redemption from Egypt also takes place by the bloody waters of the Yam Suf where we look back and see the dead Egyptians floating on the sea? That takes place on the 7^th day of Pesach, by the way- a seven-day process of us being born as a nation and becoming free. And wouldn’t you know it? The Metzora as well has a seven-day purification process until he is returned from his isolation to rejoin, or perhaps even more accurately be reborn again as part of the nation and the community.

Now lest you think this is a one-way street, if you look back with new eyes at the story of our Exodus from Egypt, you’ll be surprised to see that it all starts with a tzora’as story as well. Moshe is forced to run away from Egypt when he stands up and kills the Egyptian because as he says

achein noda ha’davar- Now I understand why the nation is in Exile. They speak lashon hara. They’re going to snitch on me to Pharaoh. There are dilutrin- people that speak gossip amongst them.

 When the time for the redemption comes though, Moshe himself is guilty of that same sin. Hashem tells him that it is time to go back and redeem the Nation and Moshe responds by saying that the nation will not believe him. They won’t believe that Hashem had sent him. Hashem’s response is to give rebuke him by way of giving him three signs. The first his staff turns into a snake. The snake being the symbol of Lashon Hara, as it is the original sin convincing Eve to eat from the tree. Next Hashem tells him to stick his hand in his cloak and it comes out with tzora’as- the first time in the Torah where we find this spiritual malady. Finally, Hashem tells him that if those don’t work then the water will turn to blood. So there you have it leper, blood, wood and do you know how long Moshe was by that bush in isolation? You got it! Seven days. Our original redemption is the birth and purification of the Metzora

 What is the connection between these two processes and what are they all about? Rabbi Fohrman notes that our sages repeatedly tell us that a metzora is halachically considered like a dead person. The impurity he exudes we find in many ways is on the similar level, where he is me’tamey anything that is even in his tent, unlike other forms of impurity. On the one hand, this poor metzora is alive and breathing still has a pulse. Yet, on the other hand he is considered as if he is dead. He is isolated from everyone else. He’s all alone. Arguably he might even worse than a dead person. Because he’s alive and aware of his situation. He’s not dead up in Shamayim with all his ancestors. He’s here in this world, with no one to talk or connect to. No one to love. No one to be there for him.

 In fact, when Hashem tells Moshe to go back and liberate the nation, He tells him it’s because the coast is clear. The ones that wanted to kill him are dead. Now the truth is that Dasan and Aviram that snitched on Moshe were very much alive, but as our sages note, they had fallen off their high horse. They were like dead people. That had lost it all. Just as when a Metzora loses it all, he’s just a corpse with a pulse.

 Do you know what the process of purification for this malady is? For this sickness that one suffers from when he speaks about others, or when he thinks and acts with ga’ava- with haughtiness. When one thinks he’s better than everyone else? When you don’t want to help anyone out and are only focused on self. The Metzora’s problem is that he is all alone. That he isn’t connected to the rest of the nation. What he really is experiencing as a result of this disease of the spirit and his self-absorption is a form of death. To recover you need to be born again. He has to recognize how all of humanity is one and a reflection of Hashem.

 To do that we essentially send him back to the womb. He goes back to that small dark little tight, lonely place and reflects on how essential human connection is to who and what we are. How in pregnancy we experience being part of our mother’s body literally. That’s how we are born. We are part of her body, like one of her limbs. We are one and then although we separate, and we come out, and it’s bloody, and it’s painful, and it’s traumatic, but we always will feel that we are one with our mother. We are one with our siblings. We are a perhaps individual human beings, but we are born to be connected as one. It’s why Adam and Eve were created as one and separated. It’s why last week’s parsha of Tazria, of the women who gives birth, precedes the parsha of Metzora.

 On Pesach what took place was the birth of our nation. The plagues we suffered were our birth pangs. The plagues they suffered, separated us from them again and again and again defining us more and more. We were being formed and born as a unique nation just as Hashem told Moshe in the beginning of our story would happen. We are His first-borns. As those final birth contractions come, we are told to take the Korban Pesach. To take that lamb with its head bent over its knees as one whole. Take it to the bedroom and tie it your beds where life is born from.  Do you know what that animal’s position is when we roast him and bring that sacrifice? It’s in the fetal position. It’s a baby.

  We place it’s blood on our doorposts- that birth canal that we will come out of and enter the new world. We take the hyssop that lowliest and most humble of brushes and prepare for our birth. We are commanded that there is a new measure of time called Rosh Chodesh, because its our birthday. And just as the bird of the Metzora that flies free dripping the blood of the slaughtered bird of loneliness and constraint that it left behind and was extricated from soars into a whole new world, so too we march out of the meitzarim- the constraints of the tzirei leida- the birth pangs of Mitzrayim- Egypt and are born as a nation.

 The past few years have all been leading up to this Pesach. It’s been more than a few years actually. The birth pangs of the Shoah led to the mass return of Klal Yisrael to Eretz Yisrael and the cleaning us out of our galus in Europe where for thousands of years we were disconnected from our home. For the first time since the Maccabees a state of Jewish sovereignty was reestablished in Eretz Yisrael. The land became pregnant and bigger and fatter with her nation growing in her belly. The land returned and developed and the industry and construction of all her limbs grew. The Torah spiritually flourished within as it seems like the angel of Hashem was teaching and building yeshiva after yeshiva. And the entire world flocked to drink from her holy nectar and breathe its air that makes all wiser.

 There were kicks and complications along the way as the contractions got bigger and bigger. 1967, the Yom Kippur War, Lebanon, Gaza, Gaza, Gaza. There were fights. We were falling apart. We become Metzoras. So Hashem put us and the rest of the world into isolation. Corona. Alone. Bidud. Contemplate. It’s the final stage. And then the final contractions of our birth began on October 7^th. It started on Shemini Atzeret when we were alone with Hashem in the delivery room. Only the Father is allowed in that room. All the other nations can’t come in. For it is a painful delivery room. The delivery room of His First Born child. The First-Born son He has been waiting over 3300 years for since we left Egypt.

  The Kabbalists mystically tell us the difference between the birth of a son and a daughter. Whereas a female’s job is to receive and develop the baby, the man’s job is to give and provide and fill the world. Our Exodus from Egypt, and all our previous salvations are compared to the birth of a female. They are only temporary. It’s cyclical. We received it without any of our own merit. The ultimate redemption though is the birth of a boy. It’s the first-born son. It’s the child that will have the power to give to the world and not just receive the beneficence of Hashem. It will be eternal.

 There is an incredible prophetic Midrash that is flying around in the Jewish social media. It tells us of the end of days.

 Rabbi Yitzchak said: The year in which the King Messiah reveals himself, all the nations of the world will be fighting with each other (Russia? Ukraine? China?). The King of Paras [Persia/ Iran] will fight with the King of Arabia, and the King of Arabia will go to Edom [USA?] to seek counsel from them. The King of Paras will [attempt to] destroy the entire world, and all the nations of the world will be screaming and confused and falling on their faces, and they will experience pains like those of a woman giving birth. The Jewish people will also be screaming and confused, and will say, To where shall we come and go? To where shall we come and go? And Hashem will say to them, My children – don’t be afraid - for all that I have done, I only did for your sake. Why are you afraid the time for your redemption has come! Unlike previous redemptions though, this will be the last redemption.  For the previous redemptions were followed by more pain and persecution, but this last redemption will have no more pain and persecution after it.

 The Talmud in Sanhedrin (98a) Discusses the names of Mashiach. The final opinion though of the Rabbis is that he is called the “Metzora of the house of Rebbi”. Mashiach is considered like metzora. The Megale Amukos tells us that the day Mashiach comes will be that of the Taharat Metzora. He points out that’s why our parsha begins with the words cryptically

“Zot Tihiyeh Torah Ha’Metzorah- this will be, in the future, the Torah of the Metzora

Ba’yom taharato on that final day of his purity.

 The verse from Daniel that our sages tell us that he is a metzora as well speaks to our time.

V’chayaleinu hu nasa- he has uplifted and carried our soldiers

Machoveinu savlam- he bears our intense pain

V’anachnu nechashavnu nagua- and we were considered blemished

Muka Elokim- Struck/plagued (makkos) by Hashem

U’mi’uneh- and persecuted

 The redemption is here. The prophecies one after another are being fulfilled. Our Avoda is to bring that Korban Pesach. To connect like we never connected before to one another. To understand that we are all one whole. To see that baby, that is us, as the First Born of Hashem. And then God willing Pesach Night just as 3336 years ago we will open up our doorways and walk out of our bloody doorposts and walk from River to the Sea. But this time eternally liberated in the final redemption of our nation.

 Have a great Shabbas Ha’Gadol and a liberating Pesach of Geulah!

Rabbi Ephraim Schwartz

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CHIZUK/TZEDAKA OPPORTUNITY OF THE WEEK

Merkaz HaChesed of Sderot- I’ve mentioned this place beforehand and I actually visited with Avichai this past week as they are undergoing a tremendous campaign for Pesach where over 650 families require food and basic Pesach assistance for this holiday. Each family will be getting packages with over 700 shekel of basic holdaiy needs as well as 300 shekel vouchers. Please help out Avicah and the people of Sderot by donating to this campaign!

 

Founded 24 years ago the by my friend Avichai Amusi who had moved to the city of Sderot by the Gaza Border with the aim of caring for the people of Sderot as well as the residents of the towns and villages in the region The Chesed Center is a not-for-profit organization that is based on the work of volunteers who bring their enthusiasm to these projects. With so many familied moving back now the demand is more than ever…

 The Chesed Center incorporates the following areas of assistance:

 1. Distribution of food baskets – Some 670 families in Sderot as well as those in the towns and villages in the Gaza Strip area receive food baskets every week. The baskets contain in-season fruit and vegetables as well as basic food commodities. About half the food baskets are handed out at a special distribution center while the rest is delivered to the homes of those needy individuals who are unable to come in person to the center. In addition to the weekly allocations, special efforts are made at holiday times (Rosh Hashanah – New Year – and the festivals celebrated in the fall, Purim, and Passover) to make a substantial distribution of food on a much wider scale and thereby they will have all they need to celebrate the festivals and experience the true holiday spirit.

  2. Soup Kitchen - The Sderot Hessed Center runs a restaurant to provide a nutritional response as required on a daily basis. The kitchen serves a hot and nutritious meal for about 80 diners, most of whom are senior citizens, especially those who have been left all alone in the world; Holocaust survivors; and the handicapped. The soup kitchen is designed to look like a regular restaurant. The atmosphere in this restaurant is welcoming and shows respect to its patrons just like family, and those same people who lack the means to eat warm and nutritious food during the week can now enjoy every day an hour or so of relaxation and contentment.

3. Clothing store – This is a second-hand clothing store, d offers for sale clothes, shoes, and other accessories. The clothes are donated by well-known companies or collected by the local residents, sorted and sold at a nominal price, a policy which shows respect for the customers who come there to buy their clothes.

4. A charity furniture store - This store offers second-hand furniture, which was donated to the Hessed Center, collected by the Center's volunteers and distributed to the needy and families on low incomes. In special cases, the Center succeeds in obtaining new furniture and these are allocated to needy families.

5. A charity store for tables and chairs – These chairs and tables are made available for festivities and celebrations as well as for mourners, heaven forbid.

 6. Yad Sarah

NOW THEY NEED YOUR HELP MORE THAN EVER WITH FAMILIES MOVING BACK TO SDEROT!!

 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tCk04TvWeaY 

 And here’s the link to donate                

 https://thechesedfund.com/ameiricainfriendsofiyim/emergency-food-and-assitance-to-homeless-and-beraved-families-in-sderot 

 YIDDISH PROVERB OF THE WEEK

" Got zol af im onshikn fun di tsen makes di beste..”- God should send upon them the best of the Ten Plagues

RABBI SCHWARTZ'S TOUR GUIDE EXAM QUESTION OF THE WEEK

answer below at end of Email

3. The name of the fortress that was built in Jerusalem during the Seleucid rule

over the Land of Israel is_____.

In which city are there remains of Herodian buildings?

A) Scythopolis

B) Beit Saida

C) Sebastia

D) Shivta

 

RABBI SCHWARTZ’S COOL VIDEO OF THE WEEK

https://soundcloud.com/ephraim-schwartz/vehi-shemada – My latest new release in honor of Pesach… You gotta hear this… It’s amazing, beautiful and Dovid Lowy knocked it out of the park…especially the shticky harmonies… You want to sing this by your Seder.

 

https://soundcloud.com/ephraim-schwartz/melech-rachamon   – Composed this hartzig Pesach song two years ago… But you have to suffer through the first 17 seconds of me singing to earn the right to hear the whole song… but don’t worry it’s so beautiful you won’t even remember afterwards my singing…

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZU6dgsylGYE  – Motty Shteimetz with this incredible rendition of Chasal Sidur Pesach an ancient Chasidic tune from the alteh heim..

 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7L2vv9uXACk   – 613 Acapella a Funny Abba Pesach rendition Matza Mia…

 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a1zqEOUCLGc – Benny Friedman Pesach in Der Heim a medley of all of the classics

 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R8c-iuwpkD0 – and here’s perhaps my favorite Pesach composition by Rebbi Nachman Seltzer of Chasal Siddur Pesach… My Seder is not complete without it…

 RABBI SCHWARTZ’S PARSHA PRAYER INSPIRATION OF THE WEEK

Seder Night- You know the old joke they say about how when one davens to Hashem from America it’s a long distance call, while from here in Israel it’s a local one. Well on Pesach Seder night we are told that it gets even better than that. Hashem Himself and the entire Heavenly hosts, the Zohar tells us, comes down and are sitting right next to us at the Seder. It’s not even a phonecall. He’s right there at the table. The Targum Yonasan tells us that this dates back even before we left Egypt to the times of when Yitzchak gave the blessings to Yaakov which was on Seder night. It’s why Yaakov brought him two goats. One for the Pesach and one for the Chagiga. It is on this night when the blessings are best to be given and when Yaakov got them from Esau. For as he says “All the gateways of heaven are opened on this night”. It’s where everything can turn around. It’s when all decrees can be nullified. Historically this has been the night of salvations throughout our generations.

 The Mishna tells us as well that on Pesach we are judged on the wheat and thus this is also an evening to pray for parnassa. There are some that suggest that it is perhaps one of the reasons why we wear a kittel. It’s like a day of judgement. It is a day of judgement. The best time to have in mind it’s brought down is when we eat the Maror fascinatingly enough as there is a hint in that the dove of Noach told Noach when he brought back the olive branch that “my mezonos- my food should be bitter like Maror”. Not that it should be bitter but rather that it is judged at the time we eat Maror and we turn to Hashem.

 As well the Ohev Yisrael notes that this is an evening to pray for ones children. For even the wicked son has a place at the Seder. It’s when everyone can be inspired by the miracles. There is a special light that comes down to our table. And thus the evening should be maximized to share that light and daven that it radiates in the hearts of all of Hashem’s children just as it did in Egypt when we were all on the 49^th level of Tumah

 Finally, Rav Milchovitz notes that this is obviously the best night to pray for the redemption. For it is this night that Hashem answered our cries and our prayers in Egypt. There are some that think we are different then previous generations because we don’t have Moshe Rabbeinu to rescue us. But as he notes, the Hagada doesn’t mention Moshe. It’s all Hashem. It’s all our prayers. And thus on this special night we should use all our power of prayer to   

RABBI SCHWARTZ'S ERA’S AND THEIR PLACES AND PEOPLE IN ISRAEL OF THE WEEK

722 BC-The Major Reform-  After that incredible Pesach of Chizkiya everything changed. A spiritual reform took over the nation that was truly Messianic. Everyone destroyed the idols amongst the nation. All of the altars that had never been taken down before throughout the entire country were removed. The nation flocked to the Temple. The Kohanim and the Levi’im swarmed there and shifts were set up for the renewed daily services and the to deal with the multitude of korbanos that the nation was finally bringing to the right address. Even more than the sacrifices though was the tithes and priestly gifts that hadn’t been given for so long. There were piles and piles, the navi tells us all around Jerusalem. From Shavuot until Sukkot of that year mounds formed all over Jerusalem of food for the Kohanim. Chizkiya then took the initiative to set up and divide it amongst the Kohanim and Levi’im all over Israel. For they had an important job as well to do.

 Chazal tell us that in the times of Chizkiya he instituted that it was no longer enough to just bring sacrifices, Torah study was going to be of essence to our nations survival and a mass Torah program started all over the country, led by the Levi’im and the scholars. He stuck a sword in the door of the study hall and said “he who does not study will suffer the fate of the sword”. What a powerful message that is for us today. It’s not our army that will save us, it’s the merit of the Torah study! 300 missiles that fell last week- or rather didn’t fall- were prevented miraculously, not because of the the US, Jordan, or even the Iron dome or Davids Slingshot and incredible Israel Air Force. It’s the merit of the Torah that our soldiers and entire nation studies that brings the divine protection from the sword. In the times of Chizkiya there was not a child from Dan to Beersheva that wasn’t familiar in even the most difficult areas of study.

 Which brings us to the next stage as well which is also amazing for our times. For what did Chizkiya do next with this strengthened nation? He attacked the Philistines in Gaza. There would be no more threats coming from there. He wiped them out like never before. And to make things even better, he then headed after our big enemy Assyria, Sancheirev and refused to bow down and be robbed and persecuted by them. They would no longer dictate what we can and can’t do. We are the nation of Hashem like never before. And thus everything is set for the fateful Pesach night miracle that will take place, that hopefully we will talk about next week…

 But C’mon isn’t this great? This column really gives us a feel and taste of how the entire country can flip around in one second, and the geula can be on it’s way…

 RABBI SCHWARTZ'S TERRIBLE IRAN JOKES OF THE WEEK

Waiting for missiles from Iran makes me feel like I’m waiting for my Hot internet tech guy who will come some time between Friday and Sunday.

 

If you are Jewish anywhere around the world and have been assaulted, insulted or harassed please call 1-800-STOP-ISLAMOPHOBIA

 Poll: What scares you more?

a) No daycare or school and the kids will be home on vacation and I haven’t finished Pesach cleaning

b) Iran

 Estimated time of Arrival of Missiles in Israel

4:02 AM Magen Avraham

4:32 AM Gr”a

8:15 AM Rabbeinu Tam

1:30 PM Monday Morning- Amshinov

 Don’t be worried about the Iranian missiles. It’s like an Israeli bank transfer. It takes a few days until it shows up in your account.

 9 hours until the missiles fall in Israel is enough time to allow your dough to rise. Let’s get started so we don’t get stuck with Matzas for the next holiday established.

 If everyone is already awake all night tonight, let’s just make the seder already…

 Joe Biden- It’s critical that Israel starts sending humanitarian aid to Iran before the closure of Israeli airspace.

 There are reports that Iranian warheads are being loaded with cheerios and breadcrumbs

 The Gaza Ministry of Health has justa announced that Israel killed 20,675 Palestinian women and children in Iran

 They sent UAV’s from Iran but it will take a few hours… It’s like when contractions start and they in the meantime until the birth, try to sleep a little.

 The Iranian Army didn’t take into account that Israel’s entire airspace had been covered in not one, but two layers of heavy duty aluminum foil.

Cleaning for Pesach reminds me of the war in Gaza. We move everything to the south part of the house and clean the North and then when we come to clean the south the children return to the north with their chametz. We either have to stop the Humanitarian aid or control the entire house by Monday!

Iran: We’ve launched missiles at you

Israel: Hmm we can’t see any

Iran: Did you try to refesh your sky some times it takes a minute because of the connection.

Israel: Yeah..nothing

Iran: Check your spam…

I don’t mean to brag or anything, but this is like the tenth “end of the world” I’ve survived…

New Biden Speech notes : “You say DON”T” really loud…

 Update: The owner of the local Makolet said Israel will bomb Iran in the next day or two. I will update after I speak to my taxi driver.

 Breaking News: The final missile sent by Iran four days ago has nearly arrived in Israel. It has just completed its’ fourth bus transfer and will be staying in a motel overnight before taking to the skies again where it will be shot down by the Israeli Iron dome system.

 The UN is fuming because of Waze recalculating being messed up all of the humanitarian aid ened up in Bnai Brak as part of the Pesach Kimcha D’pischa distribution.

 I have two nephews who were called back to Gaza and they told me that a certain number of soldiers would be allowed to return home for the Seder Night and the soldiers could decide amongst themselves who it would be. It was unanimously agreed that whoever was invited to their mother-in-laws would be allowed to remain in Gaza.

**********************************

 The answer to this week”s question is C– I got this one half right as well. Surprisingly though I got the wrong half correct. I really knew it when I answered that I was going to get it wrong. Somehow I forgot the name of the Temple Mount fortress called Anotnia that I should’ve really remembered. I remembered it was an A name But for some reason I just said Apolliana instead. Oh well… close. Part Two though that I got correct was Sebastia. I wasn’t really sure, but it made the most sense as I narrowed out the other ones. I’ve never been to Sebastia as today it’s in Shechem. But actually I remember when I wrote about it in our Tanach column, as this was a capital city of Shomron in biblical days. That it later on was a Heordian city. S0 it’s a half right for me.  And the score is   Rabbi Schwartz 2 and Ministry of Tourism 1 on this exam so far.

Time of Birth- Parshat Tazria 2024 5784

 

Insights and Inspiration

from the

Holy Land

from

Rabbi Ephraim Schwartz

"Your friend in Karmiel"

 April 12^th 2024 -Volume 13 Issue 27 4^th of Nisan 5784

Parshat Tazria

Time of Birth

Dear Ribono Shel Olam,

 Master of the world, Abba, Tatteh, Melech… Ad Mosai? How long…? How much more do we need to wait… to suffer… to hurt….to pray…to cry….? When is this going to be over? When will it start? When will You come home? When will you bring them home? All of them. It’s too much already. We can’t anymore. It’s too much already.

Was it just a two years ago by Corona that we sat alone in our homes that Seder night and thought that Eliyahu would really be by our doors when we opened them up? That the worst had already come. That You were finally ready to redeem us. That You had taken the last sacrifices You needed. That the world had finally realized that ein od milvado- that there is no one to rely on besides You. But when we opened that door there was no one there. No old man with a white beard on a donkey. No shofar. It was the same empty 2000-year-old doormat that greeted us, that has been lying there by our blood painted doorpost telling us that the redemption is not yet here. We’re still in Egypt. Adayin lo higiya geulaschem- the time is still not yet.

 So we continued with faith. It didn’t shake us. We vaccinated. Or didn’t. But we prayed. We shemitta’ed. We came to Israel like never before. We learned. We davened. We did chesed. And yes, we did fall back into our old lives somewhat, but our eyes were and still are always on the ball since then. We were ready for it to happen. We davened that past High Holidays that this year should be the last year that we are without You. That we aren’t home with You.

It was the year after Shevi’is after all. A year when our sages saw that the redemption is opportune to come. But it didn’t happen that year, and so we davened that it should be this year. And then October 7^th happened. And then that Shemini Atzeret day when the King sits with His child and asks to spend one last day together, because it’s too hard to separate from them after these incredible holidays that we celebrated for 7 days in our Sukkos. On that special holy day You walked out of the room. You left that Sukkah of protection. You let them come in. You turned Simchat Torah into Tisha B’av. All the Kinos- lamentations that we’ve said for 2000 years happened on that day when we should’ve been dancing together with Your Torah.  Since then, It’s been like the three weeks of mourning when tragedy comes again and again, only that its been” the three weeks” for the past 6 months, with no end in sight. With just an empty doorway awaiting us again this Pesach.

 We thought it might’ve happened on Chanuka the holiday of miracles; when we won over our enemies and rededicated our Temple. We finally have soldiers like the Maccabees of old, that are fighting just in Your name. Just for Your glory. But it didn’t happen. There weren’t any miracles of redemption, despite the so many small lights we lit around the world and prayers we offered.

 Perhaps when we read the book of Shemos; the book of our Redemption. Maybe that’s when You would bring it. Maybe in the month of Shevat when the sap of the geula starts to sprout up? Would it only come in Adar? The month of Simcha would finally bring that joy we had been waiting so long for? Would all the pain be batel- get wiped out, in the 60 days of those festive extra month of Adar that this special year had. Would we see a Purim miracle? We were wiping out Amalek like never before. We were united. We got smashed and lost all our da’as. All our conceptions. We sang to You. We danced with You. We cried and davened on Purim. Bring them Home. Come Home. Make this over. Turn it all around. And yet Purim passed. And Adar is over. And nothing has changed.

 So I ask you Tatteh… Ad Mosai? What more can we do? If Your plan is that if You keep squeezing us with the hope that we will do even more teshuva, I hate to be the one to tell You, but open up the Newspapers and turn on the News. It’s not happening. The nation is stiff-necked, in case You didn’t chap that yet. They’re fighting again. They’re politicking again. They’re protesting. They’re drafting. They’re pointing fingers at one another. They’re bowing down to the seuda of Achashveirosh and taking cues and directions from the goyim that want to wipe us out. The pain is too great. The letdown is too much. Amalek is laughing his tuchas off. Where are You…?

 Is there any of us that haven’t written a letter like that this past year. At least in our hearts and in our prayers, I know that you have had those thoughts and those words. I don’t think anyone of us in my lifetime has ever been more ready for Mashiach then we are today. We’re exhausted. We’re wiped. We’re terrified of the ramifications of him not coming this Pesach. We see the clock turning back to October 6^th. The troops pulling out before the job is over, while threats loom over our heads. While evil still threatens to destroy us.

 We’ve seen the true faces of the world towards us once again, when the Shechina is not amongst us, and we are not in our home with Hashem shining His light out. How much they hate us. How little they care about our blood, our children, our hostages. How little they really want us in their country and think that we’re anything like them. It’s not just the nations either and perhaps that’s the scariest part. It’s Israel. It’s our brothers and sisters here that are just falling apart despite the so much we underwent and are going through together. It’s the government, it’s the courts, it’s the sinat chinam that’s sprouting up again. So much blood has been spilled, so much pain and the baby doesn’t seem to be coming out. It’s stuck. It’s strangling itself with its umbilical cord. Has this all been for naught?

 The birthing analogy I just stuck in there by the way is really no coincidence. I think all of us in Klal Yisrael finally get a little, or maybe even a big, taste of what takes place in that birthing room in the last final moments. The woman just has no koach to push anymore. She’s done. Just slice me open and take the kid out already. I’ve been going at this for hours. I can’t anymore. Make that nurse or Doula who keeps yelling in my ear with their unhelpful words of encouragement be quiet already.

 “Breathe!”

“Push!”

“Just a little bit more!”

“You can do it!”  

“C’mon! you’ve got it now…”.

Well, I don’t

. Hashem just make it over. Take the kid out and let me go to sleep. Yeah, I get what my wife felt like now. We all do.

 Well on that note, let’s take a look at the parsha- or letter Hashem has sent us to read this week in our Torah reading, strangely titled ‘Tazria’. I say strangely, because the majority of the parsha which is focused on the laws of purity and the tumah of tzara’as’-the spiritual blemishes that can afflict our people, has nothing to do with the first verse or few pesukim which begins with the laws of the tumah of a woman who gives birth. Or in the interesting Torah term for that word- a woman who is mazria- she plants or “seeds”. Why is that the title of the entire parsha and even more perplexing is why is the particular tumah of childbirth the introduction to all of the laws of impurity. Seemingly it’s not a major impurity. It would seem that the tumah of coming in contact with death, or of a Niddah, or even the metzorah should precede these laws. It even tells us that Yoledes, woman who has given birth is like a Niddah menstruating woman, despite not even having told us what that tumah is yet. Yet, it seems that Hashem is telling us that if we want to understand Tumah. If we want to understand the way that we will become purified to come to the Bais HaMikdash, then we have to first and foremost appreciate that it’s all part of Tazriah. We’re being planted.

 Now personally unlike my father who always loved gardening, I’ve never had a green thumb. I want a burger and fries in five minutes, well done please. I have no time to dig, to plant, to water, to hedge. I’ll skip the tomato, thank you. Pickles don’t really come from the ground anyways… right? Yet over the year and half or so of Shemitta where I spent a lot of time with farmers and this year as well with many volunteer chizuk trips to farms to help them with their crops, I’ve developed a better appreciation and awe for this holy work. It’s really amazing the entire process if you think about it. We take this ground. We seemingly dig it up, we plow, we overturn it, we take seeds and throw them in and bury them in the deepest, darkest, filthiest place. We then water them, we hedge them, we cut around them, and slowly slowly they start to flower. They start to grow. The fruit sprouts forth. It’s magic. It’s life. It’s a miracle.

 Think about childbirth and the process as well. It’s pretty much the same thing. We’ll skip the first steps, but just look at the mother once she become pregnant. Just don’t tell her how she looks. She’s fat, she’s in pain, she’s bloated. She’s stretching. And then poof. A brand new life is on this world. There is no one that has ever been in a birthing room and doesn’t feel that miracle. That doesn’t get all teared up when they hear that first healthy cry. The “Mazel Tov!” Especially if it’s a boy…

 But it started so dark. So ugly. So hidden. In a place and an act where one would think that Hashem is not present. Yet just as the farmer knows that what he’s doing is not just burying a seed in the dirt but rather is creating a new life, so too does that mother when she is implanted. When she is Tazriah. Because Hashem is everywhere. Because new life starts from a dark place where one doesn’t see Hashem. It’s how the world was created from nothing. It’s how each life is created again in this world. It’s how every plant and every tree and every animal that has a spirit of Hashem on whatever level comes into existence. And it is as well how the redemption will and has sprouted up in the past.

There is so much dirt and darkness in the world from where new life sprouts up every single day. It’s the only places that it comes from if you think about it. But do you know how it comes up from there? It comes when it is planted with love and knowledge that there is life being born. The farmer is working that field and he doesn’t see earth, he sees life. He sees the fruit that will sprout up. The mother doesn’t look at her belly and see fat. She doesn’t see veins. She sees and feels that heart of a new baby being developed inside of her. The Torah is telling us that when we see blemishes, when we see tzora’as, when we see Tumah, when we see death, when we see blood of life that hasn’t flourished and “seeded” in a niddah, it’s all Tazriah. It’s all part of a process of birth and a new life. It’s Toras Ha’Yoledes- it’s the Torah of the creation of a new world, that comes from that darkness.

 That’s why by the way, it’s only the Kohen that can tell and determine what tzara’as is. For only the Kohen who blesses us each day with love, who the Torah goes out of it’s way to tell us is a child of Aharon and his sons, and whose mantra was to be oheiv es ha’briyos- to love everyone. Only he can look at that tzora’as and see and convey the love that is there, the life and purity that will come from it. Only the Kohen can tell us that it is the way for us all to come back to the Beis Ha’Mikdash.

 This past week as well we read the last of the four supplemental parshiyot we started before Purim. It’s parshat Ha’Chodesh, the reading of the first mitzva given to our nation prior to our Exodus from Egypt; prior to our birth as a nation. It’s a parsha that Chazal and the first Rashi in the Torah tells us should’ve really been where the entire Torah started from. And what is this mitzva? It’s a mitzva that tells us that there is a process in creation called Rosh Chodesh that begins with the Bnai Yisrael. We count the months. A new frame of reference of time begins. Until now the world ran on a 7-day week and 365-day year. Now there’s something new. It’s called Chodesh- which means new. Something that didn’t exist before. Something that will be revealed by this new nation that’s about to born out of the darkness and slave pits of Mitzrayim.

 Rav Moshe Shapira, in an amazing piece explains the concept of Rosh Chodesh, that as opposed to a year which is called Shana, doesn’t work on the same system. Shana- also means repetition. We say Vi’shinantam li’vanecha- we have to keep repeating and teaching the same words of old, of Torah, again and again. The world was created in 6 days and on the 7^th day of Shabbos Hashem rested. Since then that process continues again and again. There is nature. The sun rises and the sun sets. Chodesh though is another framework of time. It’s the moon that gets smaller and smaller as each month ends and then it is reborn again. There is a molad. A yoledes.

 It is in the darkest night that it restarts again. We call it a new moon, despite the fact that it’s the same old moon, because we see in it a birth of a new framework of existence. We see that time doesn’t have to work as it always did, as the rest of the world sees it. With sunrises and sunsets like clockwork. Rather it’s a framework of time that Hashem said Klal Yisrael will establish and reveal to the world that reveals to us that there can be a new world; a new Creation that has never been before. One that is not teva- natural, but rather one that is of revelation of Hashem creating anew every aspect and every moment of our existence, that is not bound or limited by the hiddenness of a natural world that was created in 7 days and put into place. For just like a newborn baby, the whole world is before him, He has the potential for everything.

 That recognition of this new framework of time is the prelude to our birth. That’s what Rashi is telling us where the Torah should’ve really started from. Because that’s the real reality. That’s the birth and creation of the world that Hashem really wants to bring us to from the beginning. We start off our Seder with the strange phrase of

 Yachol Mei’Rosh Chodesh- we might think that already from the Rosh Chodesh of Nissan we could celebrate Pesach. This is even though we were still in Egypt and our enemies were still around us. They hadn’t been destroyed yet. It was still dark. We were still hostages. The redemption, the Temple, the land of Israel seemed so far away. They had a huge army. There was a sea that stood between us and our promised land. In the seven day a week, 365 day a year world that just repeats itself, it didn’t seem possible we would ever get there.

 Yet, on Rosh Chodesh we realized that world and that frame of reference wasn’t the real one. We were in a different zone. Seas could split in this new world. First Borns could die. Pharaoh could come running and begging us to leave and to even bless him. We could destroy every idol they have and slaughter it in their face. Every humanitarian principle, every politically correct convention, every resolution and hypocritical “ethical” Geneva code that a godless Amalekite world created for themselves that never applied to the am ha’nivchar, could finally be shown and declared to be the empty antisemitic standards that it is. Because the real world that was revealed to us on Rosh Chodesh is one of miracles. One that is born anew. One that although it looks dark, that looks blemished, that looks bloody, and tamei understands that it’s just a birth canal, a wheat field, an orchard, that is about to sprout new life.  A new life that could do and become whatever it wanted to.  

 Yes, you might think that already from Rosh Chodesh we could celebrate, we start off our Magid by the Seder saying.  But the Torah tells us that we can’t. We need to wait just a little bit longer until we have matza and maror in front of us. We need to wait until that Seder night, which is our birthing room for those last final pushes. When we feel and taste that bitterness, like we’ve never felt it before. And at the same time drink those four glasses of wine and have our bags packed and our matzas with no time to bake on our shoulders ready to go and leave.

 The baby never comes when you expect it. It’s always either early or late. It comes when you’re too tired to push. When you’ve had enough. But it comes at that moment when every mother turns to Hashem and says I’m entirely in Your hands. I can’t anymore. It’s not physically possible. That is the moment when the moon rises and is born. That is when it shines the brightest. As we saw in the most recent Solar Eclipse, which is certainly not coincidental, the power of the moon can even blot out the sun. The symbolism is so much deeper knowing that the moon is Israel’s frame of reference to overcome the natural teva of the world run by the sun. It’s when we become new. It’s when the whole world will celebrate. That is when it will all finally be over and when the New world will finally for the first time begin. Mazel Tov it’s a boy!

 Have a new Shabbos and a redemptive month of Nissan,

Rabbi Ephraim Schwartz

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CHIZUK/TZEDAKA OPPORTUNITY OF THE WEEK

Chesed Shel Emes- Nacham Ami- “True kindness”-The initiative to support the families of those murdered in the “Iron Swords” war.

 One of my greatest resources in the Chesed and Chizuk trips that I’ve been doing is meeting with families who have lost someone in this war, is with the help of this incredible volunteer organization. Started by a few Kollel wives and Chareidi women in order to help these families in the first days of the war , the organization has expanded from beyond giving information for Shiva and consolation visits, but to helping financially the families that desperately need assistance.

  In the “War” room of the project in Jerusalem sit 25 ultra-Orthodox women and girls who work in shifts: they scan the web, receive information from various institutions about the times of funerals and Shiva, and update it according to regions of the country for the sake of approximately three thousand volunteers who are active in seven WhatsApp groups. The volunteers come to the homes of the bereaved families, take part in the pain, listen to the stories and to the needs of the families, and honor the memory of those who murdered. We hope that the grieving families feel that the people of Israel surround them with love and share in their pain.

 Now the initiatives seek to reach out to more people around the world. Make the story of the 1400 murdered accessible to them. Allow them to share in the pain from and send consolation.

You can also take part from afar and contribute to this project. The donations will be transferred to the needs of the bereaved families and distributed to them according to their needs as soon as possible.

 PARTICULARLY BEFORE PESACH THERE ARE NINE FAMILIES WHO LOST LOVED ONES IN THE NOVA FESTIVAL THAT REQUIRE YOUR FINANCIAL HELP FOR THIS FIRST PAINFUL YOM TOV. PLEASE PLEASE FIND IN YOUR HEART TO CONTRIBUTE TO THEM AND LET THEM KNOW THAT THEY ARE OUR FAMILY AND WE ARE THERE FOR THEM.

PLEASE SEND ME SCREENSHOTS OF YOUR DONATIONS so i can forward to these holy women  and let them know that we appreciate and are one with them in all that they are doing.

 https://nachamuami.com/about/  – Here’s A LINK FOR THIS ORGANIZATION

 And here’s the link to donate * PLEASE VERY IMPORTANT WRITE FOR THE “NOVA FAMILIES” IN THE NOTES OF YOUR DONATIONS SO THAT YOUR CONTRIBUTION CAN BE DIRECTED TO THEM*

https://impactcubed.org/give/

YIDDISH PROVERB OF THE WEEK

" Vus brentzach-Vet moshiakh geboyrn vern mit a tog shpeter.”- What’s burning? So the messiah will be born a day later

RABBI SCHWARTZ'S TOUR GUIDE EXAM QUESTION OF THE WEEK

answer below at end of Email

2. The Christian holiday that is comparable to the Jewish Shavuot is called_____.

Which of the following figures is considered to be a “Protomartyr” in

Christianity?

A)  Stephen

B)  George

C)  Peter

D) Paul

RABBI SCHWARTZ’S COOL VIDEO OF THE WEEK

https://soundcloud.com/ephraim-schwartz/vehi-shemada  – My latest new release in honor of Pesach… You gotta hear this… It’s amazing, beautiful and Dovid Lowy knocked it out of the park…especially the shticky harmonies… You want to sing this by your Seder.

 

https://soundcloud.com/ephraim-schwartz/melech-rachamon   – Composed this hartzig Pesach song two years ago… But you have to suffer through the first 17 seconds of me singing to earn the right to hear the whole song… but don’t worry it’s so beautiful you won’t even remember afterwards my singing…

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nINk8uj0sXE – and Joey’s latest with Ka’eileh, You know you’re excited that we’re gonna lein that soon right?

 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8U-rbugZHOw  – I remember this song from my Bachurishe yohrnin in yeshiva. It’s from Reb Baruch Ber Zt”l… Appropriate for Pesach’s Shir Ha’shirim Kol Dodi Dofek done beautiful by Duvy Meisels

 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i9e4DreXvgo   – Benny Friedman with a new take on a Yid never (like a moon) in honor of Chodesh and the Eclipse

 

RABBI SCHWARTZ’S PARSHA PRAYER INSPIRATION OF THE WEEK

Heart Words- For many of us the biggest challenge of our prayers is thinking about what we say. The words just flow out of our mouths. It’s like a magic ritual that we just recite. Three times a day, again and again. The blessings we make before we eat, afterwards. Prayer is called Avoda she’belev- it is work of the heart. There are two things that are important for it to work. Number one is to understand that it is work. And the second is that it has to come from and penetrate our heart.

 Now although this challenge applies to all of our prayers, but particularly when we are in such an elongated period of prayers for this war its hard to keep it fresh and not just say the words. And that’s even with the knowledge that we need our prayers now more than ever. So perhaps this column and insight this week from our parsha might help with that a bit.

 

There is a fantastic midrash Shochar Tov in the beginning of the book of Tehillim, I’ll just quote the part that’s relevant to this lesson

 “Rabbi Yehoshua ben Karcha said that it says the word Ashrei twenty times in the book of Tehillim that correspond to… Rebbi says it says it twenty two times corresponding to the letters of the aleph beis… and on all of them King David said

 “yehiyu l’ratzon imrei fi v’hegyon libi lifanecha- may the words of my mouth and thoughts of my heart be desirous before you”

 That they should do this for generations and it should be established for generations and they should not be read like the books of “Moryus”- (Homer?). Rather they should read and contemplate them and receive reward like the laws of  nega’im blemishes and Ohalos -the purity of tents.”

 There are a lot of fascinating insights in this midrash. I just want to focus in our limited space on the insight of the Sefat Emes who asks what does Tehillim and Dovid’s request specifically have to do with Nega’im and Ohalos? After-all there are a lot of different areas in the Torah that this could be compared to. What’s unique about these laws that our recitation of Tehillim, Dovid asks, should be compared and rewarded to.

 He explains that the law is that the rules of blemishes and purity of a tent is only done through a Kohen. And if there is no Kohen available that is knowledgeable then one must bring a scholar to tell the Kohen what the law is and the Kohen merely must recite whatever the Talmid Chacham tells him. The Kohen’s words work even though he doesn’t really understand them. Similarly, Dovid requested that although there is so much depth in the words of Tehillim, yet we simple people don’t always understand what we are saying or how to say them precisely. Thus he asked Hashem that the mere recitation alone should be able to give us and achieve our desired requests alone just like the laws of blemishes when the Kohen doesn’t know what he’s saying.

 The truth is each prayer of Shemona Esrei we conclude with those words of Dovid Hamelech that our thoughts and the words of our mouth should be desirous before Hashem. There are two conditions though, there has to be thoughts and there has to be words. Many times our thoughts are not really thoughts. We’re dreaming. We’re traveling the world. We’re thinking about where we need to go next. But at least we said the words of our mouth. Other times it’s the opposite, we recited the words but we didn’t pay any attention to them. They just came out, but deep in our hearts we have desires, we have fervent thoughts. Thoughts about redemption, about the return of our hostages, about a refuah shlaima- complete healing for all those injured, for those suffering, thoughts for parnasa, for help, for our children and our families. We had the thoughts in our hearts but never connected them to the words. Thus we ask Hashem that He should put them together. That he should accept them. That He should answer them, like He answered Dovid. That’s how we conclude each prayer and that’s why as well, many have the custom to recite this specific verse at the end of every prayer that we recite.

 There’s no reason to feel helpless when Davening if we didn’t have complete Kavana. Dovid already prayed that it should work for us even without the complete intent. It’s our blemish, it’s our purity of tents. That’s what connects us to Hashem. We’re trying to get close and get purified. In that merit alone Hashem will answer us.

RABBI SCHWARTZ'S ERA’S AND THEIR PLACES AND PEOPLE IN ISRAEL OF THE WEEK

722 BC-The Pesach Sin of Chizkiya- So last week we discussed the Pesach offering of Chizkiya’s generation which the Navi tells us was the greatest one since the times of Dovid and Shlomo. I presented it as two Pesch Sacrifices, the first being in Nisan and the second being in the following month where those that didn’t make it from the other tribes, the first time around or those that were unpure- or tamei came and did it as a Pesach Sheini- 2nd month make up offering. Well, that’s not necessarily the entire story. Like all good Jewish things this 2nd Pesach of Chikziya seems to be up for debate and interpretation.  

 The Talmud tells us that there were a few things that Chizkiya did that we will learn about that the Rabbis of his time were happy with and others that they weren’t. You can’t please all the people all the time, I guess. One of those things was the fact that they say he made the year of this Pesach offering into a leap year. He added a month. The question is though what that means? Now to explain before the establishment of the set calendar that we currently have, which dates back to Hillel in the 2^nd Temple period, the months were established by the court and the king. They were able to make an extra month when they felt it was necessary for agricultural or even political reasons. We have that extra month in order to coordinate that Pesach always falls out in the spring. That extra month though is always at the end of the winter in the month of Adar like we have this year.

 According to one opinion Chizkiya added that extra month though in the month of Nissan already making a second Nissan. He did that in order that the rest of the tribes could come and bring their offering of Pesach. That would seem to explain why when the Navi describes the holiday for the second time around it’s why they celebrated it for 7 days when usually Pesach Sheini in Iyar would only be for one day. Other opinions similarly with that same rationale say that the ibur leap year was added on the last day of Adar but it was also after the time it was meant to be added. These opinions follow the rule that even though the nation was impure, yet it’s permitted to bring a Pesach offering when the majority of the nation is in that state. Tumah hutra b’tzibur- for the sake of the congregation it’s permitted and thus it shouldn’t have been pushed off.

 According to other opinions though, Chizkiya only pushed off and added a second month of Nissan after the first offering was brought. This was done only after he realized that so many weren’t tahor or hadn’t come to do it the first time. The problem is that as we said the extra month has to be added at the end of the year rather than the beginning of the year. So it would seem that the month when they brought the sacrifice wasn’t a Pesach Sheini offering at all. It was Nissan take II. The sages weren’t happy about that as well, as Chizkiya had missed the boat. He shouldn’t have made a second month for this. And the truth of the matter is, fascinatingly enough, it didn’t work… sort of. You see the people weren’t ready the second time either. There were many that even the second round also were still tamei. They didn’t believe it would really happen. And so they sinfully ate as well. No one stopped them. No one threw stones at them. They were violating the law and eating impure and yet it happened seemingly against the Rabbis will.

 What makes this most incredible is that we find that Chizkiya davened to Hashem after this offering and Pesach and begged forgiveness for the people. They had meant well. They were trying to get close. They didn’t sin out of spite but rather out of love, out of teshuva. Hashem please forgive them. And he did. Unlike the offering of Nadav and Avihu who sinned on that first day of the coronation of the Mishkan in Nissan that Hashem killed, here he forgave. Here he didn’t allow it to upset the simcha. Here he finally accepted us. It’s an amazing story, with so many perspectives and lessons, that I want you to think about. Look it up. Learn it. And perhaps maybe in that merit we will once again merit to have that offering this Pesach again.

 RABBI SCHWARTZ'S TERRIBLE CHILDBIRTH JOKES OF THE WEEK

Watching your wife in childbirth...Is like watching your favourite pub burn down.

Whoever coined the term ‘delivery’ for childbirth made a big mistake. It should have been called takeout instead.

 A woman walks into a library and asks for a book on childbirth. The Librarian says "Try over there in the C section."

 God created childbirth to give women the chance to experience what it's like...For a guy to catch a cold....

 I said to my wife, "They say that childbirth is the most painful thing someone can experience..."

"Now, maybe I was too young to remember, but I didn't think it hurt that much."

 A blonde gave birth to two beautiful babies, twins, however, she cries endlessly! The nurse then tells her "But see madame! Why are you crying ? You are now mother of 2 beautiful babies, in good health!

- I know, says the blonde, but I do not know who the father of the second one is!

She was a new nurse in the maternity ward in Israel, not aware of the miraculous births that take place here. As she entered the first room she saw a new mother with 4 newborn babies lying next to her in their hospital bassinets. “Wow” she said “are all of these yours?”

 “Yes” said the new mother. “I just had quadruplets last night, but actually…” she said “that’s quite common.  You see, I come from the city of Kiryat Arba (the Israeli community translated as “village of four) and a lot of my friends have four children.”

“Pretty amazing” the nurse thought as she went to the next room. Much to her surprise the next patient was lying down with 7 little infants around her. “Are these all yours?” she again asked in shock. “Certainly” the proud mom exclaimed, “I’m from Be’er Sheva (the well of seven) and many of us have septuplets”.

The next room had a mother from the city of Kiryat Shmona (the city of eight) and sure enough 8 adorable little babies were pleasantly cooing around the mother’s bed. When the nurse came to the next room though, she immediately turned around and started running out of the hospital. On her way out the doctors asked her where she was going. With a sign of total resignation, the poor lady said “I quit! There’s no way I am going in the next room”.

“Why? What’s the matter?” the doctor said.

“Don’t you know,” the exasperated and clearly overwhelmed nurse responded. “The lady in the last room is from Meah Shearim!

 

What do you call a group of baby soldiers? An infantry

What’s a group of chubby newborns called? Heavy infantry

 A woman in labor suddenly shouted, “Shouldn’t! Wouldn’t! Couldn’t! Didn’t! Can’t!”

“Doctor, what’s going on?” asked the concerned father-to-be.

“Don’t worry,” said the doctor. “Those are just contractions.”

 What do you call a cow that had a baby? De-calf-inated

  What do you call a group of baby garbage bins? A litter

 Mrs. Goat: “Honey, we’re going to have a baby!”

Mr. Goat: “You’re kidding.”

 Did you hear about the mother who gave birth to her baby while she was in the sky? I guess you can say the baby was airborne.

 Did you hear about the lady who had her baby while on an Ocean Cruise? She needed a sea section

 Little Berel’s new baby brother was screaming up a storm. He asked his mom, “Where’d we get him?”

His mother replied, “He came from heaven, Berel.”

Berel exclaimed, “Wow… I can see why they threw him out!”

 How did the baby tell her mom she had a wet diaper? She sent her a pee-mail (sorry couldn’t resist..)

 How can you tell the gender of a baby?

If he cries it’s a boy

If she cries, it’s a girl

 I sat next to a baby on a ten-hour flight. I didn’t think it was possible for someone to cry for ten hours straight. Even though the baby was impressed, I pulled it off

 I requested the flight attendant to switch my seat as I was next to a screaming baby. Apparently, you are not allowed to do that if the baby is yours

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 The answer to this week”s question is A– I just have no kpoach for these dumb Christian questions. Really… Hopefully Mashiach will be here soon and we can just blow up all of these idolatrous churchs in this country. I got this one half right. The first part is easy Pentacost is an easy holiday to remember because penta is 50 and Shavuos is 50 days from Pesach. The second part though I really had no clue, nor do I care who the first martyr is of these ridiculous Christians made-up faith. I guessed George the answer was Stephen. Like I said who cares? Os it’s a half right for me.  And the score is   Rabbi Schwartz 1.5 and Ministry of Tourism .5 on this exam so far.