Karmiel

Karmiel
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Thursday, July 15, 2021

Nesting- Parshat Devarim - Tisha B'Av 2021 / 5781

 

Insights and Inspiration

from the

Holy Land

from

Rabbi Ephraim Schwartz

 "Your friend in Karmiel"

July 16th 2021 -Volume 11 Issue 40 7th Av

Parshat Devarim / Tisha B'Av

Nesting

My wife did not have an easy time with her pregnancies. Most women don't. She always said the reason Hashem made women the ones to carry the children for 9 Months is because men couldn't handle it. I agree, although I did counter that it was as well because women could never handle being married to a pregnant man. She didn't appreciate that. And a word of advice for my soon to be married son- don't say things your wife won't appreciate particularly when she's pregnant. That's what friends are for.

 Needless to say it was not fun. She had pretty severe hyperemesis which is a fancy medical word for lots of nausea to the point where she literally didn't eat or drink for months and was hooked up to IV for most of the time. That's just besides all the usual annoying and painful things about carrying a kid around in your belly for a few months. Fuggedabout childbirth, I don't even want to think about how much that hurts. One would think that after undergoing something as traumatic as that you'd pretty much be done after one or two, I certainly would. But not my wife, or most of the religious women I know. They keep going and going and going. If my wife had her dream come true she would've had at least 10 children. I'm good with the 5, Hashem has blessed me with. I'm even better that they're getting married and slowly one by one starting to move out.

 Now one of the most perplexing phenomena that I noticed when my wife was pregnant in the last month or so before our children were born was that there were changes that started to take place around my house. Furniture was being rearranged, my favorite couch was being thrown out, we suddenly needed a paint job, although it seemed pretty fine to me. I generally have no problem with getting rid of old stuff, particularly other people's stuff in my house, but suddenly my drawers were being emptied and my tools and chazerai that I just kept around in case I need them one day-not that I would know how to use any of them, I'm more of a duct tape, butter knife type of guy to be honest- were being thrown out, or posted for sale. New furniture delivery started showing up at my door. My house as changing. I didn't know where to sleep anymore. Who stole my wife and replaced her with an interior decorator or clutter-clearer?

 When I told my fellow commiserating Kollel chavrusa who was a bit older than me about this strange behavior I was encountering, he welcomed me to the phenomena that is called "nesting". It seems that women are like birds he told me. Before the birth of a baby they undergo some natural instinct and urge to "prepare the nest" for the newest arrival. I was confused. He tried to make it more meaningful to me. He pointed out that when I sit down to eat a nice big barbeque, I usually loosen my belt a bit beforehand, I kick off my shoes, roll up my sleeves, sometimes even tie a little bib on for those sticky buffalo wings. I prepare myself for the bird or cow I'm about to devour. Well, women are also like birds in that way. Except that the baby bird (or pargit as they call them here in Israel- I have no idea why…) is inside of their belly already. They are going to be bringing the baby bird out and they are obsessed with making the house comfortable for them. OK I was beginning to understand. But regardless if I did or I didn't this was the reality that I had to put up with at least until her childbearing days were over… Or so I thought.

I came home yesterday and my very nice bedroom dresser and mirror that I had since we were married was outside of the front of my house. Right next to it was my dresser. Hmmm… Actually come to think of it, the other day there was someone in our spare bedroom tinkering away. Is something going on that I don't know about? Sure enough I went up there and saw my bookshelves half empty and boxes of books next to them. This is not a good thing. I thought I passed this point in my life. I knew my wife wasn't pregnant, so where is this coming from? And then I chapped.

 See my daughter Shani, god willing is due in the coming weeks (B'sha'ah tova, bli ayin hara..pu pu pu…!). We're expecting to be grandparents once again. Now my wife has never really been clear on the concept of grandparenthood. Yoliyahoo, my grandson is probably here more than he's by Shani's house. He sometimes slips and calls Aliza, Mommy. (He never gets me confused though..). I tried to explain to Aliza that grandparents is just about feeding them lots of sugar and sending them back home to their parents, but she's bad about the sending home part. Shani, my daughter, incidentally has no real problem with this. In fact when Aliza told me Shani was due she even mentioned to me that she might have to move in with her after the baby to help her out a bit for a few weeks with the new-born. I told her she didn't need to worry. Shani would probably just knock on the door and drop the baby off and pick him/her up a few weeks later…

 So now I understood. My wife was "nesting" for her new grandchild… Sigh… this really doesn't end.

 Now the truth is there is another reason why all of this "nesting" stuff might be coming up this time of year. It's the month of Av. Sunday is Tisha B'Av and it's a time when all of us are really meant to be "nesting" a bit. Thinking about the home and place we need and want to build to host the Shechina that is coming back home to the world once again very soon. Our mourning is part of our preparations and the building of those bricks of the new home of the third temple which should hopefully coming soon. Perhaps my wife's nesting is something we are all meant to be doing this week.

 Now, in order to prepare for this "nesting" process we begin the fifth and final book of the Torah. Fascinatingly enough Reb Moshe Tzvi Savran would advise people that were having a hard time having children to study the Book of Bamidbar. The Belzer Rebbi finds a remez for this in that when Torah tells us that Yitzchak dug wells there were five wells that were mentioned by name. Each one of those five names corresponds to a different book of the Torah. Esek- is that Hashem was busy creating the world, Sitna- hatred is Shemos where the Egyptians persecuted us, Be'er mayim chayim- the living well is Vayikra which is full of the laws of sacrifice and closeness to Hashem. Bamidar is Be'er Sheva because it is divided into two books making the 7 books of the Torah (deeper concept-don't worry about it). And finally the last well was called Rechovot- because Hashem has made us large and fruitful in the land. And there you have it Devarim is about having children.

The Zohar even notes that the 5th letter in the Alef Beis is Hei which is the letter of pregnancy. It is the letter that was added into Avram and Sarai's names who couldn't give birth transforming them to Avraham and Sarah the Patriarch and Matriarch of our nation. All of the wives of Yaakov had a hei in their name; Leah, Zilpa, and Bilha'ah even had two hei's. The only one that didn't have a hei was Rachel and therefore, Reb Chaim, the brother of the Ma'aharl suggests, Rachel took Bilhaah and gave her to Yaakov. She figured that maybe that extra Hei of pregnancy that Bilh'a had, would roll over to her. The Radvaz even notes that the letter Hei even looks like a pregnant woman. It is the only letter of the entire Alef Beis that has a letter in its belly. I bet you'll never look at hei again the same way…

 Do you know why we read this 5th book this particular Shabbos? The Gemara tells us that we have a very special birth coming up this Sunday, on Tisha B'Av. Perhaps the most important birth in the history of the world. No less than Mashiach Ben Dovid we are told is born on Tisha B'Av. Devarim is the parsha of that nesting before his birth. It is the parsha where Moshe awakens us to do teshuva, by remembering the sins that kept us out of the land. It was the Eicha that we read of our troubles, our fighting, our arguing.

Do you know what Eicha is? Why doesn't it just say Eich- which means how? What's Eich- ah with a hei at the end. It is how did we lose that excitement and anticipation of our redemption. Why have we stopped nesting? How come we have stopped waiting for the birth of that new day to finally begin? How have we forgotten how pregnant we are, and how close we are to our due date.

 This has been a very long pregnancy. But the contractions are certainly getting stronger and stronger. The world is screaming for redemption. Cries of tragedy after tragedy, craziness after craziness, panic, emotions soaring unexplainably. We're in the labor room. We just need to push a little harder, mourn a little deeper, daven a little stronger and then very soon we will celebrate the Shalom Zachor we have all been waiting for and our empty nest will finally be filled once again.

 Have an uplifting Shabbos

 Rabbi Ephraim Schwartz

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 RABBI SCHWARTZ’S FAVORITE YIDDISH PROVERB OF THE WEEK

" Az men ken nit iberharn dos shlechteh, ken men dos guteh nit derleben.." If you can’t endure the bad, you’ll not live to witness the good.

RABBI SCHWARTZ'S TOUR GUIDE EXAM QUESTION OF THE WEEK

answer below at end of Email

37) The Arab village A-Shibli is located in the area of:

A) Mount Tabor

B) Givat Hamoreh

C) Tel Arad

D) Hula Valley

 RABBI SCHWARTZ’S COOL VIDEO  OF THE WEEK

https://soundcloud.com/ephraim-schwartz/al-eileh-acapellaMy Al Eileh Compostion sung by the incredible Dovid Lowy- Acapella… what do you think?

https://youtu.be/5lkodrL5_pk  Trailer for Rabbi Yoel Gold's "The Wait" Tisha B'Av film

 

https://youtu.be/cMEilW4ADB8     - Trailer for the BJX Tisha B'Av program with Beri Weber, Baruch Levine and incredible speakers… looks good.

 

https://youtu.be/rRI4srWglHs  - Trailer for OORAH's children video with Rabbi Yitzy Erps also

 

https://youtu.be/39c-5KXBk9A - Tisha B'Av and Rachel's tears with Rabbi David Fohrman

 

RABBI SCHWARTZ'S PARSHA/ ERETZ YISRAEL CONNECTION OF THE WEEK

 

The Real Torah – Parshat Devarim- We begin the last and final book of the Torah this week; Sefer Devarim. It is always the book and parsha we read before our national day of mourning for the Temples and all of the tribulations of our Exile throughout the generations. The Book begins with the words

Eileh Ha'Devarim- these are the words that Moshe spoke to all of Israel on the banks of the Jorna in the land of Moav Moshe explained this entire Torah.

 There is a rule our sages teach us and Rashi in  Parshat Mishpatim quotes that whenever a narrative begins with the introduction of "Eileh- these" it invalidates the previous things mentioned. In this case, the Mei Merom notes, it would seem that this book which is known as Mishneh Torah- the repition of the entire laws and narratives of the Torah that Moshe explained here would be invalidating everything said in the previous commandments. What could that possibly mean? How can the previous Torah be invalidated and why would Moshe feel the need to repeat it all here?

 He suggests a very powerful and mind-blowing idea that the Ramban notes in Parshat Eikev that the primary objective of the Mitzvos are to be fulfilled in Eretz Yisrael. He quotes the Midrash Sifri which writes

 "Even though when I will exile you from Eretz Yisrael, you should still be meticulous in following the commandments in order that when you return to Israel it should not be like brand new to you."

 The Ramban explains that the commandments are the judgements of Elokey Ha'Artetz- the God of the land of Israel, even though we the obligation is upon on each individual wherever they are. The Mei Merom elaborates on this idea that the individual obligation each person has to fulfill the mitzvos emanates from the Land of Israel where they draw the source and spiritual root of the commandments. We keep the mitzvos in chutz la'aretz to bring the holy air and spirit of Eretz Yisrael into our lives. When one fulfills a commandment no matter what it is, putting on tefillin, making a mezuza, giving charity, observing Shabbos one pulls the energy of that mitzva from the air of Eretz Yisrael and we are connected to the land despite how far we may be from there. That spirit gives us life. It keeps us spiritually connected to our source even if aren't privileged to live and observe the mitzvos where they are naturally meant to be kept and have the most power.

 He explains that this is what means when it says we need to preform commandments so it shouldn't be new to us when we come back. The Sifri is not saying that we may forget the commandments, but rather that we will be kept new and connected in even when we are in Exile and we will not need to be renewed when we come back to Eretz Yisrael. For we will have always maintained the connection vis a vis the Mitzvos that always breathed the air of Eretz Yisrael into our lives.

 It is for this reason that Moshe reviewed the Torah right at the border of Eretz Yisrael. He was telling the nation that the Torah that you observed until now in the wilderness.  We are now entering into the source of the Mitzvos. If we fulfill the Mitzvos properly there, we will not need to be exiled. We will not need to come on to the power of this "repetition of the Torah" that Moshe is teaching here which will be the conduit to bring the Torah and commandments even to the Diaspora. This "Chutz La'aretz" Torah of Sefer Devarim invalidates the original commandments that were given on Sinai that were all taught to be kept and infused with the holiness of the land. This is the reading our sages felt we need to hear every year as we mourn the destruction of our Bais Ha'mikdash and the sins that caused our exile from the land.

 We need to long to come back to the place where we were meant to keep the Torah the way it was given on Sinai. We need to have that direct line to Hashem. If we mourn with this intent Hashem will certainly bring us all back home again.

 RABBI SCHWARTZ'S ERA’S AND THEIR PLACES AND PEOPLE IN ISRAEL OF THE WEEK

 

War Preparation- 840 BC Having just confounded Achitofels's plot to launch a surprise ambush attack against Dovid, Chushai Ha'Archi, Dovid's trusted plant in Avhshalom's camp decides to send word to Dovid of this plot in case Avhshalom had a change of heart. He sends out the son of Tzadok Achimatz and Yonasan ben Eviatar to warn Dovid. They were staying the pasuk tells us in Ein Rogel.

 Ein Rogel is today an identifiable place and is mentioned a few times in Tanach. It's in fact right below the city of David in Silwan and there is even a mosque built next to what used to be this former spring and then well called Bir-al Ayub. It is located right by the middle of the two valleys of Gei-Bein Hinnom and Nachal Kidron. The Spring will have significance again in Tanach when Adoniyah the brother of Shlomo gets his coronation over there.

 When the messenger came to tell them to go warn Dovid, they were spotted though and they quickly run to the city of Bachurim, if you remember that was the city of Shim'i Ben Geira who cursed Dovid, near Anatot or Mt. Scopus on the way to the Midbar Yehuda. Hashem though was looking out for them, and despite the fact that they were in enemy territory, he provided them a well or resouvir to hide in. As well He arranged that the woman of the house would come out at that moment and cover up the well by laying out her wheat to dry. The guards of Avshalom who came searching for them, didn't want to disturb it and they gave up the search. Whewww…. Close call.

 Achimatz and Yonasan make their way to Dovid and warn him that Avshalom may start coming to him if he chooses to follow Achitofel's advice who is trying to encourage him to attack immediately. Dovid heeds the advice and quickly crosses the Yarden. Achitofel realizing that his plot was up and that his advice would not be taken, went on home and hung himself. His last words of advice to his children were to never start up with the house of Dovid and not to involve themselves in dispute. Thus another one of Dovid's enemies meets their fateful ignominious end.

RABBI SCHWARTZ’S JOKES  OF THE WEEK

SHAME ON YOU… TOMMORROW IS TISHA B"AV…. NO JOKES THIS WEEK…

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Answer is A- I has mazel for this one, which actually happens on the real exam as well. To be honest I had no clue where the Arab village of Shibli was. Although somehow I remembered that it was a Bedouin village. Where it might be I have no idea. So I propbably would have guessed Arad because most of them are in the South. But just yesterday I did a tour for Mishpacha Magazine on stories on Tanach in the Jezre'el Valley and sure enough I drove through Shibli as it is the village to go up to Mt. Tavor from. Isn''t that cool, how the one place I needed for this week's question I was there yesterday for. So the score now is 29 for Rabbi Schwartz and 8 for the Ministry of Tourism on this exam.

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