from the
Holy Land
from
Rabbi Ephraim
Schwartz
"Your friend
in Karmiel"
May 25th
2023 -Volume 12 Issue
32 5th of Sivan 5783
Shavuot
Naso /Shavuot
The Most Insignificant Significant Ones
He was the youngest kid in the
“Levi” family Not only were they all Levis , but they were in fact the first
Levis ever, as their father was actually Levi the son of Yaakov. All his older
brothers had it made. His middle brother, Kehas, really did well for himself.
He was the proud Zaidy of Moshe, Aharon and Miriam. Not bad. The family of
Kehas were the ones that got the most important job in the travels in the
wilderness as well. They were the ones that got to carry the vessels of the
Temple, the menorah, the altars and the table- pretty awesome. Best of all they
got to carry the famous Ark with the Ten Commandments in them. Talk about a
good gig. The truth is that they didn’t even have to even exert themselves for
that honor because as our sages tell us the Aron miraculously carried them.
Cool!
Now, his oldest brother,
Gershon also had a pretty cool job, being the one to carry the curtains and the
walls of the Mishkan. But Merari was the youngest. He got stuck with doing the
real legwork. He schlepped the beams, the nuts, and bolts. Nothing too fancy or
pretty. Just a regular shlepper.
But it didn’t just end there.
See, Merari really doesn’t get too much respect over-all. His name is kind of a
lousy one. Every Pesach Seder everybody would joke about him and rib him about
being their bitter herbs/Maror.
To make matters worse, in last
week’s parsha Hashem commands Moshe to “Naso” the rosh of
Kehas- to count them and lift them up. As well this week’s Parsha begins with
the command to uplift as well the heads of his older brother Gershon. Yet when
it comes to Merari though, Hashem just kind of says
‘and the Children of Merari should be
counted’.
Nothing fancy. No uplifting. Just
the plain old dirty work of schlepping beams. The Midrash even notes this and
says
“Hashem
gave honor to the family of Kehas and Gershon uplifting of their head. Kehas
because of the honor of the Ark and Gershon because he was the first-born.
Merari, however, who was only a simple son and whose work was carrying the
beams, poles, and bolts it does not say the words ‘uplift their heads’
Poor
Merari. It doesn’t seem fair.
Moving along we approach this
week the holiday of Shavuos. As well it seems to be a holiday that’s pretty left out. First of all
unlike its two brothers Pesach and Sukkot, the holiday of Shavuot only has one
day. Not a week-long holiday. Next, its name seems pretty pathetic as well.
Shavuot-weeks? Huh? That’s more about counting from Passover, rather than its
own holiday. Kind of like the younger brother of Pesach.
To make it even more pathetic.
Shavuos doesn’t really have any fun things about it. No real mitzvos. No matzas,
no sukkas, no shofars, no menoras or even hamantash.
The Torah doesn’t even tell us exactly when it is. Is it the 6th of
Sivan? The 7th? We’re not really sure. Moshe added another day. When
I look at the Torah to find the laws of Shavuot it doesn’t have its own parsha,
unlike every other holiday that has a little peh or samech in the
Chumash telling us that it has its own chapter, Shavuos kind of just gets stuck in the middle
of the conclusion of the counting of omer laws.
People even eat milchigs for
their meal on Shavuot…pizza, quiche…things that would be considered
disrespectful to other holidays. Rightfully so I should say, I mean if there’s
no dead animal on your plate is it really a holiday? ‘Hello-oh?’, as my
kids would say. Isn’t it even worthy of mention that the Torah was given on
this day? Shouldn’t there even be a mention somewhere that this was perhaps the
most significant day in the history of the world. As the famous Rashi in
Bereshis tells us that and ‘It was morning and evening and it was ‘The’ 6th
day (of Creation) is really just a reference to the 6th of Sivan-
the day the Torah was given. The entire creation of the world was only created
for that day; that moment when Hashem would reveal himself to mankind
face-to-face and we would accept the Divine mandate. Man would be given the Divine
blueprints of the world; the Torah.
On the other hand, Shavuos has
somethings that no other holiday has. We actually count for 49 days up to this
holiday. From the month of Sivan we stop reciting tachanun, the prayers
beseeching Hashem for mercy. Because these are festive days, special days
leading up and preparing for the holiday and the receiving of the Torah.
Even more fantastic. In the times of the
Temple, there were a lot of Jews that came to bring their sacrifices for the
holidays. For each holiday, Sukkot and Pesach, one had the entire 7 days to
bring their sacrifices because it would have been impossible to do it in one
day. When it comes to Shavuot one also has 7 days after the holiday to bring
the sacrifices. The only difference is that it’s not even Shavuot anymore. It’s
a regular weekday. A regular working day. Yet one can and certainly did bring
their holiday sacrifices still. That’s pretty amazing. So what’s really up with
Shavuot? What’s the real deal of that poor shlepper youngest brother Merari?
Our sages tell us that all the holidays
represent a force, a spiritual energy that Hashem put into creation that we can
and are meant to tap into. Pesach is freedom, we therefore eat matza,
and we therefore recline and celebrate. Sukkos is faith, understanding that
Hashem is watching over us and thus the Sukka. Even Chanuka and Purim have
their energies of light in the darkness and miracles, and of course the High
Holidays are all about repentance, atonement and the kingship of Hashem, so we
blow the coronation shofar and we are busy fasting and repenting.
Shavuos is different though.
Shavuos is when we became one with Hashem. It was the day that Hashem took us
as His nation, and we took Him as our beloved. We became one. That is not
something that can and ever should be symbolized by any particular action or
even energy. It’s the basis of everything. It’s above time. It’s above any specific
descriptive name or even historical commemoration. It transcends any definitively
limiting mitzvos. We were forever bound with the eternal. We became the
possessor of the Book and the instructions and mandate of how to transform the
entire world to the eternal and connect them to Hashem.
You can’t put a name, a time,
a custom, or even a celebration on that. Shavuos’s power and revelation can transform a mundane regular weekday to a
holiday sacrifice day because it’s all one. It’s all Hashem. It’s the one holiday
that all the sages agree can only be fulfilled if you enjoy the physical world -the
‘lachem’ the you’ as well. You don’t even need a steak to make that
happen. Even a pizza will do. For the ‘you’ is entirely Hashem. Both the flayshig
you and the milchig you.
Just as significantly it is
the day that each Jew saw each other as no better or worse. Not more religious,
no prettier, no smarter, no more or less important than the other. Like one man
with one heart. Just as my hand, my arm and my leg all married my wife and not
one part of me is more or less married and important than another, so did every
Jew look at their neighbor: the Yankel, the Jack, the Saa’dia, the Ayelet, the
Ora, the Michael, the Bethanny, the Shaindel and the Ephraim. The doctor, the
lawyer, the Rabbi, the Rosh Yeshiva, the garbage collector, the professor, the
tour guide, the soldier, the pizza maker, the farmer, the sheitel macher and
the yenta down the block from the grocery store; we are all one. There is no
me, him and you. We are all Hashem.
There is nothing about all of
these aspects of this day that could ever be picked out to signify it and
encapsulate its essence. It’s everything. In fact, quite the opposite would be
true. Selecting one thing and one aspect would lift one piece over the other
and minimize it. This holiday is the holiday of total bitul-as the
chasidim say- totally removing everything and connecting myself to Hashem and
in that process to His entire creation. The raising up of anything over the
other will only serve to negate that oneness.
Which brings up back to Merari
and the children of Levi. Levi was chosen to be that tribe that would have no
part of the land of Israel. Hashem is their portion. They are above one
particular area of residence. They serve in the Temple as the intermediaries
between us and Hashem; the connectors. Each family has its own aspect of that
connection. Kehas, which comes from the word gathering (v’lu kehat amim)
is the Ark, the Divine, the vessels, the holy of the holy; obviously raised up
above all. They are the goal we strive for.
Gershom-from the word chase
out, and as well the word ‘dwell there’ is represented by the curtains. They
are the sur mi’ra- the removal of all the negative forces that serve to
pull us away from Hashem. Incidentally, the beginning of the process, as King
David tells us is to first be sur mi’ra and then asei tov-do
good. Therefore, it is represented by the first born Gershon. But that process
also includes protecting all the vessels, covering and enveloping them. Our
commandments and mitzvos serve as an adornment for the Torah and our external
expression to the rest of the world. They are also a process that uplifts and
is “Naso”.
And then there is Merari- the
day to day sometimes bitter daily grind; the world that we live in. The nuts
and bolts of our physical existence. They are represented by the beams of the
Tabernacle that really correspond to the entire world and all of Creation. The
Creation where hidden underneath it all is the Divine. It is all One. Merari is
us. There’s no need to uplift it because it is the foundation of it all. It was
built with the blueprints of the Torah. It is the purpose of the entire
creation. It was given to us on Shavuot.
We stood, this Sunday 3335
years ago, on a small simple mountain and connected to Hashem. It was a truly
remarkable day. On Shavuot we will have the ability to reconnect with that
moment. To experience the Divine once again and feel it burn with in each of
us. May we merit to experience it once again in His holy home.
Have a uplifting ephemeral Shavuos,
Rabbi Ephraim Schwartz
************************
YIDDISH PROVERB OF THE WEEK
“Ganaiden
un gehenem ken men baideh hoben oif der velt.”- Heaven and hell can both be had in this world.
RABBI SCHWARTZ'S TOUR GUIDE EXAM QUESTION OF THE WEEK
answer below at end of Email
23)
Christianity became a state religion (i.e. an official religion) in which
century?
The first
council of the Christian church took place in:
a) Nicaea
b) Chalcedon
c) Ephesus
d) Rome
RABBI SCHWARTZ’S COOL VIDEO OF THE WEEK
https://soundcloud.com/ephraim-schwartz/eitz-chayim -In
honor of Shavuot- Rabbi Schwartze’s greatest hits Shavuot Playlist- Here’s my
Etiz Chaim Hee- with a little bit of Gilligan in it?
https://soundcloud.com/ephraim-schwartz/kad-yasvun -
This holy song I composed is about the tremendous simchas Ha’tora in heaven
when we study Torah- My take on the classic Kad Yasvun… beautiful!
https://soundcloud.com/ephraim-schwartz/torah-hakedosha – Composed
by my father’s hachnasat Sefer Torah to our shul last year… It’s our prayer to
the Torah to daven to Hashem for us. Torah Hakedosha- with the 2nd
sentence of this lyrics that most people don’t know…
https://soundcloud.com/ephraim-schwartz/dovid-melech-r-ephrayim
– And finally Shavuos is the
yartzeit of Dovid Ha’Melech so get on your dancing shoes and be sure to sing
this great fun song by your Shavuos meal- my Dovid Melech song…
RABBI SCHWARTZ'S ERA’S AND THEIR
PLACES AND PEOPLE IN ISRAEL OF THE WEEK
Famine and Pigeon Poop- 680
BC- It’s been
6 years since that battle with Aram, and despite the fact that Elisha
showed them mercy they had laid a siege around our capital city of Shomron.
Now the siege in itself wouldn’t have been that bad, had there not been a
famine that took over the land. The famine was decreed by Elisha in
order for the Jews to be inspired to do teshuva, but as generally happens, it
takes time until we finally get it. And in the interim, it gets worse and
worse.
Our sages tell us that the first year they ate what was in
storehouses, the 2nd what was in the fields, year 3 kosher animals
and then from there on it was downhill. Non-kosher animals, insects and by the
sixth year… the flesh of their own children. This was what the prophets Yeshaya
and Yoel described would happen, as well as the Torah itself when it
describes in the Tochacha to us what would be if we didn’t follow the
commandments.
The Navi uses an interesting description to tell us about the
poverty and it tells us that the hunger was so bad that the price of a head of
a donkey- which can’t be too tasty cost 80 shekalim and pigeon dung was going
for 50 shekels. Now pigeon dung was important in ancient times. We find on Masada
and really most Roman 2nd Temple period cities Columbariums
which are these huge towers where they raised pigeons. Pigeons were used as
food, as well as they were the ancient cell-phone towers, I like to tell my
tourists, as they were the messenger birds. But perhaps most important about
pigeons was that their dung was used as fuel to make fires and warm stoves and
ovens and cook and bake on. In many places you don’t have wood to burn, like in
Midbar Yehuda and other desolate places in Israel and thus pigeon poop
was the fuel of choice. When the Navi is telling us about their poverty it
accentuates that by telling us that there wasn’t even fuel to use.
The famine and siege hit such a low, that King Yehoram would
walk around daily to the people and make sure his troops and walls were
protected, on one such excursion a woman came over to him with a tragic demand.
Her neighbor and her had made a deal. On day one they would eat her child on
day two the neighbor would cook up her child. The problem was after the first
neighbor’s kid was all eaten up by the two of them, the other one was backing
out of the deal and hid her kid. Chutzpa! So this woman came to the King to demand
justice and that the other child should be handed over to be eaten. Absolute
insanity…
When the king heard this he rent his garments and put on sackcloth.
He was remorseful of the evil ways of his people. Yet, at the same time he was
furious at Elisha for bringing them to this point and threatened and even put
out an order to have him killed. Yet, once again Elisha is not that concerned.
Hashem had accepted their flawed teshuva and that was enough. What happens next
will be another one of the fantastic miracles of Elisha.
RABBI SCHWARTZ’S CHEESECAKE AND
BLINTZES JOKES OF THE WEEK
While driving to work today, I saw a huge cheesecake...Around the
next corner was a large trifle, followed by an apple turnover. There were no
cars. It seemed to me the roads were strangely desserted.
What do you call a vegan cheesecake? Cake.
God: (creates cheesecake)
God: (While fressing it up deliciously) “Oh wow! This is so
great!”
Angel: “Don’t you think you should be sharing that?”
—pause—
God:(creates lactose intolerance)
An ice cream, a creme brulee, and a slice of cheesecake joined the
army, but they abandoned their fellow soldiers on their first deployment .They
are wanted for dessertion.
You know what they say about New York Cheesecake? If you can bake
it there, you can bake it anywhere.
I knew I needed to do my stomach surgery when I went to the
doctor...and he said "Don't eat anything fatty."
So I asked "So you mean like potato chips and cheesecake
and stuff like that?"
And he said "No fatty, don't eat anything."
Did you heard about the cave-in at the cheesecake factory? There
was de-brie everywhere
The cheesecake was picking on the cookies. The pie came over to
break it up. And said “Hey! Why don’t you Pecan someone your own size!”
I like to eat cheesecake when I go to Midbar Yehuda. It’s my
favorite desert
Yankel walks into a bar and orders a beer. "I need a place
to hang out a bit. My wife is upset with me again. She got home from work and
asked me if I ate all of her cheesecake in the refrigerator," the guy
tells the bartender.
"I told her, Don't be silly. I ate it on the couch.'"
What’s the best thing to put into a cheesecake? Your teeth.
One cold winter day in Chicago a poor Jewish man was slowly walking
home from the factory when he passed by a fancy, expensive restaurant. He
stopped before the huge glass window and gazed for several minutes at the rich
people sitting in the plush warm room talking and laughing while eating
delicious cheese blintzes, completely oblivious of him as though they were on
another, higher plane of existence.
"Blintzes," he muttered to himself as he turned
and continued home.
"Sarah," he announced to his wife as he closed the door behind him and
threw his coat over a chair, "Sarah, I've been thinking, do you think
you could make me blintzes? I would really like some blintzes."
"Of course Max," she answered. "I'll try
my best."
Sarah took out her old cookbook and opened it up to "Blintzes".
"Aha!" She happily exclaimed. "Here they are… blintzes!"
Two cups of flour, a cup of water... "Oh, look here, Max,
it says we need cream cheese. We don't have cream cheese," she said
sadly.
"Listen Sarah, you know what? Forget the cheese,"
consoled Max.
"Look here" she called out again. "It says we need
walnuts, honey and raisins!"
"Forget that stuff,
too," he advised. "Oh you are such a good husband Max! But,
what's this? What about cinnamon and brown sugar," she read out from
the book.
"Not necessary!" he decreed. "Just please
start baking already, Sarah, I'm really hungry."
So she ceremoniously lit the oven, mixed the flour and water,
rolled it into cigar shapes put them in to bake and in just minutes there they
were, sitting on a plate before a very happy Max, napkin tucked into his
collar. His knife and fork immediately went to work and within seconds he was
actually doing it! He was eating
blintzes just like the rich guys in their fancy restaurant. Sarah watched him
proudly as he slowly swallowed. After several seconds of complete silence she
couldn't resist. "Nu, what do you think? Do you like it?"
“You know, Sarah," said Max. "You know, I don't understand what
those rich people see in blintzes."
Irving goes into a restaurant and orders potato latkes. When they
come, he complains that they do not look good and he changes his order to
blintzes. After he eats the blintzes, he stands up and starts to leave the
restaurant.
"Wait a second," the manager shouts after him.
"You have not paid for your blintzes."
“What are you talking about?" Irving says. "Those
blintzes were an even exchange. I gave you the potato latkes for them."
"Yes," says the manager, "but you did not pay for the latkes
either."
"Why should I pay for them?" asks Irving. "I didn't
eat them."
THE FEMALE STRESS DIET
This is a specially formulated diet designed to help you cope with
the stress that builds up during the day:
Breakfast - I grapefruit, I slice whole-wheat toast, I cup of skim
milk.
Lunch - Small portion of tuna with a cup of spinach, 1 cup of
herbal tea, I cracker.
Afternoon Tea - The rest of the packet of cracker, I tub of Ben and
Jerry’s ice cream with chocolate topping, I jar of Nutella.
Dinner - 4 bottles of red wine, 2 loaves of garlic bread, I family
size supreme pizza, 3 Snickers bars.
Late Night Snack - Whole frozen Sarah Lee cheesecake eaten directly
from the freezer.
Diet Rules
1. If no one sees you eat something, it has no calories.
2. When drinking a diet Coke with a chocolate bar, the fat in the
chocolate is cancelled out by the diet Coke.
3. When you eat with someone else, calories don't count if you do
not eat more than they do.
4. Food used for medicinal purposes does NOT count. (For example:
hot chocolate, toast, cheesecake, vodka...)
5. If you fatten up the people around you, you will look thinner.
6. Cinema-related foods have a zero-calorie count as they are part
of the entertainment package and not counted as food intake. This includes
popcorn, skittles, caramel Corn, Doritos and frozen Cokes.
7. Small pieces of chocolate chip cookies have no calories because
breaking the cookies up causes calorie leakage.
8. Food licked from knives and spoons has no fat if you are in the
process of cooking something.
9. Foods that are the same color have the same amount of fat.
Examples are: spinach and peppermint ice cream, apples and red jelly snakes.
Carrots and Fanta soda, bananas and custard pie.
10. Chocolate is like a food-color wildcard and may be substituted
for any other color.
11. Anything eaten while standing has no calories due to gravity
and the density of the calorie mass.
12. Food consumed from someone else's plate has no fat as it
rightfully belongs to the other person and will cling to his/her plate. (Oh,
how fat likes to cling!)
And remember: 'STRESSED' SPELT BACKWARDS IS 'DESSERTS'!
********************************
The answer to this week”s
question is A – hald right
or half wrong, who cares.? I'ts still not bad for Christianity which is not my
strong subject. Especially before this holy day of Shavuos when the truth came
down to the world. I got the firt part right which is of course the 4th
century, when the Byzantines came inot power and got rid of the pagan worship
and upgradedn to Christian avoda zara. The second part I got wrong. I really
was going togo with Nicacea which was the right answer, but I thought maybe it
was a trick questiona dn went with Chlacedon instead. Oh well... Anyways. it's all
bubbeh maysehs anyways... so th escore now stands at 17 for Schwartz
and 6 for Ministry of tourism on this exam so far.
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