from the
Holy Land
from
Rabbi Ephraim Schwartz
"Your friend in Karmiel"
August 2nd 2024 -Volume 13 Issue 41 27th of Tamuz 5784
Parshat Matos-Maasei
Revenge of the Yehudi
(Yes, I know it’s extra long… but double parsha and important week…but don’t miss my new song release below)
It was cool. There I was Wednesday morning finishing up my davening in shul at the sunrise neitz minyan that I daven at. Who can sleep these days anyways? The Psalm of the day that Levi’im would sing in the Bais Ha”Mikdash for Wednesdays that we recite at the conclusion of each morning prayer starts off
Kel nekomos Hashem- Hashem is the God of vengeance
Kel nekomos hofia- The God of Vengeance will shine forth.
Hinasey Shofet Ha’aretz- Arise the Judge of the earth
hashev gemul al ge’im- render retribution on the arrogant
Ad masai resha’im Hashem- Until when will the wicked Hashem,
Ad masai reshaim ya’alozu- until when will the wicked exult?
Ya’biu, yidabru asak- they speak freely, they utter malicious falsehood
yisamru kol po’alei aven- they glorify themselves, all those evil doers.
Amcha Hashem yida’aku- They crush Your nation Hashem,
v’nachalascha ya’anu- they afflict Your heritage
Almana, v’geir ya’harogu, v’yesomim yeratzechu- they kill widows and strangers, and orphans they murder.
Va’yomru lo yireh K-ah, v’lo yavin Elokey Yaakov- and they say ‘See not Hashem and don’t understand the God of Yaakov…’
There have been a few times that I’ve recited this prayer over the past year when I had more kavana and appreciated the words, as they echoed the thoughts of my heart. Certainly, the first few months after October 7th each time I said these words, I certainly meant them like I never in my life have before. I wanted revenge. I wanted the obliteration of evil. I wanted them to not just be killed but to suffer. As the Psalm continues quite descriptively
Va’ayeshev aleheim es onam- He turns upon them their own violence
U’vra’asam yatzmiseim- and cut them off with their own evil
Yatzmiseim Hashem Elokeinu- cut them off Hashem our God.
I don’t want anyone else to die. I don’t want anyone else to be killed fighting this cancerous evil. I want to see it be ripped out. I want them to pay dearly and deeply for the so much pain that they are causing my brothers and sisters. For the horrors they have perpetuated. For the children they have killed, the women they have defiled, the bodies they have desecrated and the martyrs they have massacred. I wanted them to suffer all the pain they have caused and more. I wanted Hashem to take care of the job and restore His name. His miracles. His greatness to the world. The chilul Hashem- the desecration of Hashem’s name that permeates the world every moment that His nation is being beaten and killed and He remains hidden is abominable. It’s painful. It’s the epitome of evil.
Yes, the first few weeks and months after October 7th I would recite this psalm with a lot of kavana. I felt, as many Jews throughout our long, bloodied exile have certainly similarly felt, that Dovid Ha’melech wrote these words 3000 years ago prophetically to speak to me today in my times. For me to recite and to appreciate and beseech Hashem with.
But the war has shlepped out. It’s 300 days. 300 endless days since Simchat Torah; that “black Shabbos”. I still have kavana in my Shemona Esrei (check out last week’s email- if you missed it). There are words and phrases that jump out at me as I recite them throughout the prayers and that I pause for a second or two and think about. But the end of davening is rough. I’ve got a day. Places to go, tours to lead, people to take care of. This past Wednesday I wasn’t working though. The truth is, I wasn’t working most of the week. People aren’t and weren’t coming. I had more time to think about this prayer at the end of davening. Each sentence felt like it was written for me to recite that morning.
Last Shabbos the 12 children from the Druze village in the Golan were massacred while playing soccer. Children. Beautiful children. Some families losing more than one child. My heart went out for them. The Druze are generally loyal Israeli citizens that serve in the army of Israel, and to a large degree are in general even tougher, more aggressive and hate the Muslims more than we do. The Golan Druze though are a different breed. None of those killed are Israeli citizens. They chose not to receive citizenship since 1967 when we returned the Golan Heights, the ancient land of Bashan conquered by Moshe, to the borders of Israel. It’s the land where Moshe places half the tribe of Menashe, who joined Reuvein and Gad in this week’s parsha, who preferred these hills and grazing land to the land across the Jordan River that we had been promised. Yet, despite their lack of citizenship, these Druze are perhaps the “stranger- the “ger” that was killed together with our widows and orphans that Dovid wrote about. They demanded revenge and so did this entire nation. The psalm of Wednesday of the Levi’im was being sung by all of Israel that morning.
{Aside- I was actually limping around on crutches that morning, as I had hurt myself on an EZ-Rider accident, while riding through some vineyards with my tourists the previous week. I guess there must have been some angel with a sword standing in my way, that I didn’t see, but my faithful EZ-Rider did and swerved out of the way and threw me from its back. So when I recited the verse in that same psalm that said
Im amarti matah ragli- If I said my foot falters
Chasdecha Hashem yi’saadeini- Your kindness Hsashem supports me.
I reached down to my own faltering foot and realized that it also had particular relevance to me}
Yet, one has to ask oneself, I’m sure many of us have and struggled with this. Is revenge a good thing? Is it something we should want to do? Now to be clear, I’m not talking about the eradication of evil. I’m not talking about removing threats, returning hostages, bringing our evacuees back to the North and South of our country. I’m not even talking about punishing the terrorists and creating fear and deterrent for anyone else to ever start up with us again. That’s not revenge. That’s common sense. Those are all essential and necessary responsibilities of every country and civilization to its citizens. Someone who doesn’t believe that those core values and objectives are critical to their continued existence probably have never cracked a history book and chances are they won’t be around too long.
Those above basic objectives are what the Prime Minister of Israel has declared to be our goals in this war we are fighting. Most of the world recognizes the sensibility of this in at least some capacity and really have a hard time arguing against the justice of those objectives. Although under the gun, their inherent antisemitism tries to prevent us from accomplishing those goals by distorting them into something else. It’s the yi’dabru asak- the malicious lies and the yisamru po’alei aven- and the glorification of evil, that King Dovid wrote about in that psalm, that they utilize against us to prevent us from making sure that October 7th doesn’t happen again and that Hamas isn't around the day after to come back and take another swipe at us.
But none of those objectives are revenge. Even Israel doesn’t have the guts to say, we are going in to take revenge. Revenge is a whole new level of objective. Revenge is taken not for security purposes, not for achieving any military victory, or creating a future deterrence. Revenge is payback. It’s making them hurt and suffer because they made us hurt and suffer.
In war there are civilians and soldiers. Military objectives and Geneva rules state that only soldiers are fair game. There are rules about treatment of prisoners, of humanitarian aid, of how to accept surrender. Those rules apply to everyone besides Jews, by the way. But they make sense, because war is about achieving military objectives. Civilians aren’t part of that. And unfortunately for us as of yet, perhaps the problem is that we are only viewing this as a war. A just war, as they like to call it. It’s why even the State of Israel is tragically if not even cruelly differentiating between civilian versus military casualties and even hostages. In war one does that. But this is not a war. We are all equal in this one. There are no soldiers and no civilians. There is only the nation of God and the desecration of Hashem’s name. The regular “rules of war”, even the Torah and Jewish ones don’t apply. For this last fight before Mashiach comes, we need to understand this.
What this battle is rather about, is revenge. This is a totally different animal. Revenge is about making them suffer. It’s killing their babies, their women, destroying their cities. Making them eat dirt. It’s hurting them. It has nothing to do with war. It’s he hurt me and now I have to hurt him. A war is over, when the enemy surrenders, when they’re overpowered, when we conquer them. Revenge isn’t over, until they suffer as equally if not more than we have. Are you ready for that? Does it make you feel uncomfortable? How do you feel about that type of war? And before you answer that question, how would you have answered this question on October 8th, 9th or 10th and are you answering it differently now?
This week, we conclude the book of Bamidbar. We’re parked on the other side of the Jordan river opposite Yericho, we’re ready to hear Moshe’s last speech, which is entire book of Devarim coming up. But before we get there we have one last mission. One last task before we drink that last cup of redemption of “V’heveisi- and I will bring you to the land” that Hashem promised us 40 years before when our Exodus from Egypt began. There’s one thing left that we have to do before Moshe can say his final words and our next leader Yehoshua can bring us home. Hashem, tells us and Moshe as well repeats this command somewhat differently, but they basically keep the same idea, that we need to take revenge. Nikama! Nikama! Nikama! We need to avenge, either the vengeance of The Jewish people, as Hashem commands Moshe, or alternatively if not simultaneously, the revenge of Hashem as Moshe relays it to us. But we need to take revenge against the Midianites. Yup, until we take revenge, we can’t come to Israel. Moshe’s job and teaching isn’t over until we successfully pass this seemingly very difficult challenge.
So, let’s start slowly and understand this. First of all, what did Midian do? The Torah tells us that they sent Bilaam to curse us and he even came up with this idea that the way to get us was to perhaps give some of their daughters to seduce our boys. Hashem doesn’t like that type of stuff. He responded by bringing a plague that killed 24,000 of us,. But even more dramatically, and what gets missed sometimes, is that the Jewish people and leaders killed our own perpetrators of this event and the sinners involved, to the number of close to 200,000. Rashi tells us that each judge killed 2 people. That’s almost 1/3 of the 600,000 number Jewish people that were wiped out from this one event! But you know what? Midian wasn’t the only one that was involved in this act. Moav was as well. Yet there’s no command to do anything to them. In fact, Moav, and their king Balak were the real ones that were behind this thing and it was mostly the Moabite girls that did this. Why aren’t we out to get them?
As well, sure their seduction and sending out their daughters to entice us is wrong and bad, but isn’t that on us? Do you feel comfortable killing non-Jewish women and their families and religions for intermarrying with us? Do you feel comfortable taking revenge against them?
Yet this final mitzva before the redemption gets even more strange. It is after all the longest and most detailed war that we ever have. It is not lead by Yehoshua, our general, but rather by Pinchas, the newest Kohen. Usually the tribe of Levi doesn’t go to fight and yet here they put on their uniforms and stand next to their brothers in arms side by side. One thousand of each tribe, which to be honest isn’t a large army against an entire nation. Put it this way, there were almost 50,000 women captives that our boys came home with. There were five kings and huge armies we fought against. Imagine how many of them there were that we had to fight. And all we had was an army of 12,000?! Why not recruit more? Were they worried about chareidi demonstrations in the street? I would say not, as the ones that were chosen were in fact the most righteous and chareidi of all.
Oh, and once we’re mentioning the women captives for that matter, the Torah goes to incredible detail about the exact amount of each animal that they came back with. There were over a half million sheep, tens of thousands of donkeys and cattle. The Torah goes through precise detail and accounting of every last hoof that we brought home and which we were ordered to divide amongst the nation equally and donate a portion to Hashem. Who needs this information and why is this so different and detailed?
As well the extensive recounting of this war includes all of the laws about koshering all the vessels that we took from them. This is not the first war we’ve fought. We just smashed Sichon, Og, we fought Amalek, the Canannites nowhere else does it give us these laws and details. There’s something strange in this narrative and unique. Ma Nishtana ha’milchama hazeh mi’kol ha’milchamos- why is this war different than all the other ones?
The answer though it would seem is that these are not war details. In fact, this isn’t even a war. It’s revenge. As opposed to all our battles which were either defensive, to conquer land, or to remove an enemy that would threaten our security, Midian is none of the above. Its location is in Saudi Arabia far away and they never even threatened to kill us. It’s precisely because of this why the mitzva to attack them isn’t as well against Moav. Moav is in Jordan. An attack against Moav would be construed to be for defensive reasons. It would be to inherit their land. It’s not about revenge. We don’t have to kill their “civilians”, their women, their babies. That’s special for Midian. That’s special for the last battle before we come into the land and are finally redeemed.
Now, if this concept seems challenging to you and your-or our, moral values, don’t feel bad. It seems this idea was challenging to us back then as well. In fact, truth be told, we failed somewhat initially in this mission. We didn’t kill the women. We didn’t kill the ones we thought were innocent. We came back with hundreds of thousands of prisoners; women and babies. Fascinatingly enough when Moshe orders us to kill them all, because after-all this is revenge- not regular war, there is one demographic that is surprisingly spared. The baby girls. Baby boys we kill. Women we kill, Old people we kill. Just leave those little shiktzalach. Why is that? It’s a question I never had before this year, but lately its been troubling me.
Now this is not an Amalek fight either or even the 7 nations of Canaan. This is Midian. They don’t pose a threat to the name of Hashem or His throne being complete, as does Amalek, and they are not preventing us from coming into the land. And thus as opposed to those other nations here we’re not commanded to wipe out the entire nation. As I keep repeating and it becomes clearer and clearer, this is not a war. It’s revenge. It’s Nikama. So then why are we leaving the baby girls? Can you imagine how many babysitters we would need? Figure there were 50,000 women, imagine how many baby girls they had. What’s going on? We’re told that Pharaoh back in Egypt only drowned the Jewish baby boys and wanted to leave the girls to marry them. Are we Pharaoh? The truth is there are some commentators that even suggest that these Midianite girls would grow up and convert and marry Jews. But why? Isn’t there enough of a Shidduch crisis already?
There’s a fascinating Zohar that shares a secret about these girls. It tells us that the words v’hataf banshim- the female babies- in this verse is the same gematria as the word malchus- kingship. The sparing and even perhaps adopting of these baby girls is what defines this entire act as revealing the Kingship of Hashem. There’s another word as well that equals that 496 gematria of the above words. It is the word that introduces the mitzva to attack Midian. “Tzror”- which means to harass, assail, antagonize depending on which translation you utilize. Cause them tzoris. Pain them. Rightfully though, none of the commentaries translate the mitzva as “to attack” or “wage war” against them. This is about inflicting pain. And when we do that Malchus is revealed. The Kingship of Hashem will then be ready to descend on the land.
The Sefas Emes shares what this concept of revenge and this mitzva of Midian is all about. He explains that the only ones that can really have such a brutal capability let alone a desire to inflict such pain and to see such revenge is someone that feels wounded in the most personal of ways. It’s only someone whose daughter was abused, whose baby was murdered, whose son or father or mother are being held in a tunnel as a hostage and being tortured and brutalized. It’s someone that understands that the only way to reveal Hashem in this world that could allow such a thing to happen is by seeing that not just that the criminals are painlessly put to death by injection or in an electric chair or put in a cushy jail for life. It’s not about seeing that our children returned to us and that we have made them no longer into a threat. Hashem, the just King can only be revealed in this world when measure for measure is carried out. When they pay as much as they took. When they suffer as much as they made suffer. The word Nekama in fact is from the word takum- to get up. The only way to that Hashem can rise or anyone can truly rise is by seeing that day when true justice is served. There is a void and a vacuum- a chilul if you will, as long as the world exists and that justice and balance is not restored. Nekama is the restoration of that perfect universe where His Oneness is revealed once again.
Now on the one hand nekama is the most personal and deepest of emotions and actions that one can take. However for it to be pure and holy, for it to be godly, it can’t be personal. It can’t be my revenge. It can’t be a vendetta for my personal slight. The Torah repeatedly tells us that we are not allowed to take revenge. It’s a dangerous path. The truth is we can never even really get true justice or payback from someone. Because after all, even if we gave tit for tat, or an eye for an eye, their taking of our eye or child was without cause and ours is with cause. So it’s never the same.
The revenge Hashem and Moshe teach us that we need to learn and preform before coming into the land, is the revenge of Hashem, it’s the revenge of the Jewish nation. It’s not my payback. It’s payback for what you did to Hashem’s name in this world. It’s payback for what you did to the nation that is One with Hashem. The only way to accomplish that though is if there is no personal negius- nothing about myself in the equation. It’s merely and selflessly entirely for Hashem and our nation. It’s when my love and passion for Hashem and for Klal Yisrael is so great that I would kill the world for them. But the one caveat is that it is entirely about them, about Him, and not at all about my personal agenda.
The Sefas Emes thus explains that it is for this reason, why Yehoshua couldn’t lead the battle. He had some personal in it. He knew that his Rebbi, Moshe, would die and he would lead afterwards. He might fight differently with those other agendas in mind. They had slighted his Rebbi publicly and shamed him. It would be about Moshe and not Hashem or the nation. That can’t work. For then it would be his battle, his revenge and not Hashem’s or Israels'.
Similarly, he explains, that’s why we failed initially in this fight. We left the women and children alive. We left them, because we didn’t see them as a threat. We didn’t hate enough, because we didn’t love Hashem and see the shame and scorn of Klal Yisrael and the Shechina enough. We settled for some “Malchus” revelation by the fact that we did a partial vengeance, but we couldn’t go the final yard. It was only when Moshe got angry at them and they felt his wrath, that they saw how much he felt about what Klal Yisrael and Hashem’s shechina had lost because of this nation that still needed to be set upright that they had the strength to finish the job.
This mitzva is not for everyone. It wasn’t then and it isn’t now. The parsha is called Matos. It’s the leaders of the tribes. It’s the holiest and greatest men. There’s only 1000 of them in each tribe that can negate their own personal inclinations and entirely act on behalf of Hashem and selflessly for the nation of Israel. Yet those 12,000 that are only motivated by the vengeance of Hashem can conquer a world as they join heaven and the Kel Nikamos Hashem in their act. The Mitzva and key word that keeps repeating itself in this command is hichaltzu- which biblically translates as gird yourself, but in fact comes from the word chalitza- remove from oneself. Perhaps even more precisely in our case, it means remove your ‘self’-your ego. Become the avenging arm of Hashem. The rest of the nation will stand behind you. We’re not on your level. Every soldier will have a tribe behind him davening that he is successful in his task. That then brings unity. That reveals kingship. Thus the shechina can be revealed. It can stand.
The key to knowing that this is all about Hashem is by precisely not eradicating them all. A vengeful wild frenzy and killing spree doesn’t stop and spare baby girls. It doesn’t keep track of every sheep, every donkey, every necklace and earing. It doesn’t worry about koshering the vessels. The one common denominator of all these unique factors of this war, is that we are taking out one part and dedicating it to Hashem. We are revealing the godliness. Our act of revenge is one of uplifting, not of destruction. It’s bringing the world to a better place. It’s that my deepest and strongest emotion and actions are only behalf of the nation and there is no other personal self-interest, besides the revelation of the Oneness of Hashem and the Oneness of His nation.
Midyan, the Chasidic masters tell us has the same letters as the word dimyon- imaginary, fake, unreal. (Isn’t it pretty amazing that the word media has the same root…hmmm) Midian represents the idea that there is a “me” that is separate from Hashem. That their daughters are there to entice us to their fantasy existence and drown us in a fleeting world and pleasure that is disconnected from our Creator. In order to battle that force and to reveal Hashem in the world, we need to take that deep passion and channel it directly to Hashem. We need to vengefully stand up against them. We need to destroy that entire world and then bring those very same daughters and uplift them under the wings of the shechina. It’s the exact opposite of the intital decree of Pharaoh so long before. It’s revealing the malchus of the taf b’nashim that will shine forth and eradicate the falsehood of their worlds when those same daughters are pushing baby strollers in Meah Shearim and saying Tehillim and psalms of praise to Hashem whose Kingship will shine over the entire world.
When I concluded the psalm this past Wednesday, I noted that it concludes with the same sentence that we begin our kabbalat Shabbos each Friday night.
Lechu Neranana La’Hashem- let us go out and sing to Hashem
Na’ria L’tzur Yishaeinu- Let us call out to the Rock of our salvation…
Ki Kel Gadol Hashem- for Hashem is a great God
U’melech Gadol Al Kol Elokim- and a Great King above all powers.
The Kingship is revealed, the great eternal day of Shabbos can start at the conclusion of Kel Nekaomos Hashem- when we finally see that revenge of Hashem revealed and achieved in the world.
As I closed my siddur, my phone beeped. Isamiyil Hanniyeh killed in Tehran. Hezbolla’s number two killed in Beirut. Israel assassinates Muhamad Deif Hamas’s commander, The oil ports in Yemen of the Houtis are burning. The headlines keep coming in. We’re taking revenge. Hashem is taking revenge. We’re getting closer to the place we need to get to. Our job is to unite, to be filled with love for one another, to daven, to pray, to push beyond ourselves and our ego and channel all we have into becoming the one nation that can reveal the One King. This Shabbos there are those here saying that it may be the end of the world. I’m looking forward to it being the beginning of a new one.
Have a safe Shabbos and a turned around joyous month of Av,
Rabbi Ephraim Schwartz
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YIDDISH PROVERB OF THE WEEK
" Got shtroft, ubber der mentsh iz zikh noikem....”.- God punishes, but man takes revenge
RABBI SCHWARTZ'S TOUR GUIDE EXAM QUESTION OF THE WEEK
answer below at end of Email
16. The stream that flows into the sea near Tel Akko is____.
What is the closest hospital to the Birya Fortress?
A. Rambam Health Care Campus in Haifa
B. Poriya Medical Center in Tiberias
C. Galilee Medical Center in Nahariya
D. Ziv Medical Center in Tzfat
RABBI SCHWARTZ’S COOL VIDEO OF THE WEEK
https://soundcloud.com/ephraim-schwartz/al-eileh-acapella – For the month of Av my Al Eileh Acapella Vocals and arranged by Dovid Lowy, a song hopefully we will not need to sing this year…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c9UmNLIuaWA - Shai Graucher’s latest release moving Tzur Olamim in memory of his father Dedi and a merit for yeshuos.
https://soundcloud.com/ephraim-schwartz/achainu – My latest release Acheinu or even better please click on this 24/6 link and make me go vira if you have an account - https://24six.app/app/music/content/191798
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=srQmnvg7tPI - Tateleh Kum shoin with an incredible KolKulam Bnai Yeshiva preformance
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5pk4YGioeQE – Mutty Steimetz Kol Demei Bonecha
RABBI SCHWARTZ’S PARSHA PRAYER INSPIRATION OF THE WEEK
War Prayer- We started this column this year to increase our appreciation and our level of prayers during this eis tzara- this time of trouble and war in order that we merit the salvation that we so eagerly await. This week’s parsha though really shares with us how essential these prayers are. The Torah tells us in Parshat Matos about how we prepared for war against Midian. This is a war of vengeance. Unlike our other wars which were defensive in nature, or to conquer the land, We never conquered the land of Midian. We just went in there to October 7th them back a little bit. To give them a taste of what they did to us by making us sin, by seducing our men and causing the wrath of Hashem to fall upon us. This was payback and we did what needed to be done, slaughtering their men, women and even baby boys. Its what you gotta do some time…
Now to prepare for this fierce battle we are told that each tribe gave 3000 troops, yet only 1000 of them ended up fighting. 1000 watched their munitions and the last 1000 prayed for the success in battle. Yes w needed people to daven for us. Now I want you to appreciate this. This is despite the fact that Hashem commanded us to go to war. This is despite that the Urim V’Tumim was asked and we got the approval. Even so, we still need prayer to succeed.
The Netziv in his sefer Meromei Sadeh notes on the Talmud in Berachos 3b that describes the war procedure wherein the Jewish people would go to the Sanhedrin to ask their permission to go to war and to ask the Urim V’Tumim during the period of the Temple. Where Rashi notes that they want to the Sanhedrin to pray on their behalf. This is even after they were assured by Hashem that they would be victorious. And Hashem doesn’t lie. It was a given. Yet, as he writes even though victory was assured there is still a need for prayer, for who knows how many will be wounded or captured or killed until the victory is achieved. For this we need prayers. For this the nation has to unite and to adopt a soldier to daven for 1000-for 1000 in order that they come home safely.
There may or not be reasons whether to say the prayer in davening for the Chayalim or not that is established to say in many shuls. In my shul of course we say it as well as the one for the State and the hostages. Yet whether you say that specific prayer or not, it is inexcusable not to be davening for our soldiers. Every yid with a heart and a neshoma has to understand that our prayers are necessary- if this is true in cases where Hashem has assured our victory then even more so today, when we don’t know what will be. Even more so today when every day our brave young men and women are being killed on the battle fields. We who do not have the privilege of taking a gun and slaughtering these Midianite Amalekites baby-killers and their spawn, need to at least to our share and daven that Hashem give our Chayalim and our leaders the strength to avenge the blood of our people and the disgrace of Hashem and Eretz Yisrael every second one of them still walk the face of the earth. May Hashem answer those prayer speedily!
RABBI SCHWARTZ'S ERA’S AND THEIR PLACES AND PEOPLE IN ISRAEL OF THE WEEK
701 BC- Miraculous Healing – The prayers of Chizkiya were answered. Not only were they answered but they were answered immediately with Yeshaya not even leaving the room and Hashem appearing to him telling him that not only would Chizkiya live but that he would be granted an additional 15 years of life. Thus Chizkiya would live to the age of 54, surpassing the age of kareis- the punishment of being cutoff from Hashem and life that befalls someone who dies before age of 52. Whewww I’m 53, so I guess I should thank Hashem as well…
Chizkiya breaks out in song and praise of Hashem, promising to sing to Hashem for the rest of his life. This is a true descendant of Dovid Ha’Melech, and in fact Hashem had told Yeshaya that Chizkiya’s prayers were answered in the merit of his great grandfather, whose line he would carry on. So in the true custom of Dovid Ha’Melech Chizkiya composes his song of life found in Yeshaya 38. It’s an incredible song that was meaningful for me to read now, as we look at the dire situations that we are in and recognize that the redemption of Hashem could and god-willing will come at any minute.
Yet Chizkiya wants to be sure that this healing that he will be having is for real. So he asks for a sign. Yeshaya ever gracious asks Chizkiya if he wants the sun to set early or set late by 10 hours. To be more accurate, he asked if he wished the shadow of the sun to go forward or backward. Life is called a shadow, it is the shade of the spirit of Hashem and light that is hidden beneath. Chizkiya choses to move the sun backward and extend the daytime. This miracle actually was a reversal our sages and a fixing that took place when his father Achaz died and Hashem made the sun set quicker so that none would have time to eulogize him. See, Hashem doesn’t like eulogies on wicked people. Too bad, we allowed eulogies to take place for our enemies that we killed this week, and didn’t learn from this. So when Chikziya moved the clock backwards it caught up with those missing 10 hours. This miracle and request though as we will see next week will have dire results to it.
Finally, we are told that the healing of Chizkiya took place when Yeshaya, fascinatingly enough put fig bundles upon his blistered sickly body. Those figs healed him. I never really appreciated this story until I was once at my friend Mordechai, the fig farmer in Elifelet, who told me that actually when they pick figs the sap that comes out of it is very acidic and actually destroys the skin. In fact the people that pluck the figs have to wear hazmat suits and gloves so that it doesn’t drip on their skin and burn them. Thus these figs that Yeshaya used on Chizkiya really should’ve been the worst things to use to heal him. And that was part of the miracle. Just like Hashem tells Moshe to throw a bitter stick into the water to make it sweet, and Elisha to throw salt into the water to make it sweet. Hashem wanted to Chizkiya that prayers and teshuva can turn everything around and it is all in His power. May Hashem sweeten our days as well and heal all of those that need refuot.
RABBI SCHWARTZ'S REVENGE JOKES OF THE WEEK
Three rough-looking bikers stomp into a truck stop where a grizzled old-timer yid is having breakfast. One of the bikers extinguishes his cigarette in the old guy’s pancakes. The second biker spits a wad of chewing tobacco into his coffee. The third biker dumps the whole plate onto the floor.
Without a word of protest, Yankeleh pays his bill and leaves.
“Not much of a man, was he?” says one of the bikers.
“Not much of a driver, either,” says the waitress. “He just backed his truck over three motorcycles.”
"I'd like this book on revenge please"
Cashier: "You'll pay for that."
I’m going to start a restaurant called: Revenge is a Dish Best Served Cold. You know what we’re going to serve? Just desserts...
To the thief who stole my Microsoft Office... I will get my revenge... you have my Word...
A blind guy walks into a primarily female bar. During a break in the music, he loudly says "hey, y'all wanna hear a blond joke?"
Being blind, he doesn't realize how many blond women are in the bar. The bartender walks up to him and tells him "Alright man, I know you're blind and new around here, so let me offer you some advice. I am 6'5 and blond. I wrestled in college and I work out everyday. The girl to your left is blond, and she's an MMA fighter who paralyzed an opponent last year by accident . The girl on your right is blond, and she's a boxer. The girl at the table behind you is blond, and she just got out of prison for killing a man. At the table next to her is yet another blond, who beats up people for a drug ring regularly and frequently escapes from jail to enact revenge on people who don't pay up.
Now tell me, cowboy, do you really want to tell a blond joke?"
The blind man sighs. "Nah, I don't want to have to explain it 5 times."
Unbelievable!!! My girlfriend broke up with me yesterday, so in revenge I stole her wheelchair...
Well, guess who came crawling back today...
On the day Elka received her learner’s permit, I agreed to take her out for a driving lesson. With a big grin, I hopped in the back behind the driver’s seat. “Why aren’t you sitting up front on the passenger’s side?” she asked.
“Elka, I’ve been waiting for this ever since you were a little girl,” I replied. “Now it’s my turn to sit back here and kick the seat.”
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The answer to this week”s question is D– That was fast… I’m back to my 50/50 again… I had no clue what stream flows by Tel Akko. To be honest I didn’t even know there was one there. Nachal Na’aman was a stream I never heard of and I can’t imagine that any tour guide would get that question right. It’s a cheap question, nobody goes there… I knew whe I guessed the Gaaton which is by Nahariya that it would be wrong, but at least the correct answer was one I never even heard of before. Part B though was easy. Birya is right outside of Tzfat and therefore the right answer was Ziv hospital in Tzfat. Right now that area is burning up because the government and army really don’t care much about the North. But in good old day would be thee in that area a lot. So half right half wrong makes the correct new score Rabbi Schwartz 10 and Ministry of Tourism 6 on this exam so far.
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