Cave-Men- Parshat Emor / Lag Ba'Omer 5780 / 2020

Insights and Inspiration

from the

Holy Land

from

Rabbi Ephraim Schwartz

"Your friend in Karmiel"

May 8^th 2020 -Volume 10 Issue 29 7^th Iyar 5780

Parshat Emor / Lag Ba'Omer

Cave-Men

I'm sick of writing about Corona- excuse the pun. It's enough already. We have heard all the insights. We have done all the introspection. It's time for something new. How about a tour? Would you believe that I'm available? I'll even give you a discount. Let's get our minds off of this whole thing. It's Lag Ba'Omer this week. The day that we celebrate the Torah of Rabbi Shimon Bar Yochai buried in Meron. Unfortunately, this year it's all closed up so I can't really take you there. But in preparation for that, check out my link below for my pictorial Mishpacha off-the beaten-track tour below. Then of course write them lots of letters to the editor telling them how much you enjoy my columns. It's the least you can do right?

So I can't take you to Meron. But a good tour guide always has a back-up plan. How about a little drive not too far away to the village of Peki'in. There in this Druze village, which incidentally has the longest consecutive Jewish presence for over 2000 years- {Not Jerusalem by the way which we were forced to abandon after the Bar Kochva revolt-} is the proud location of the famous cave where Rebbi Shimon and his son Rebbi Eliezer hid for 12+1 years. They were quarantined if you will. So don't complain about 2 months, try 13 years…

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The famous story goes, there were three Rabbis sitting in the mishnaic coffee room one day talking around the water cooler. Rebbi Yehuda bar Ilai suggested that the Romans were good for the country. It had been some time since the Temple was destroyed already and now the Romans in charge of Israel were fixing up the country. They were improving the failing infrastructure of the roads, the economy and markets were flourishing with all the new jobs they had created. They were making Israel great again after almost a century of depression and economic downturn. Rebbi Yosi, who was sitting there, decided that it was wise to just be quiet. You'd never find him on facebook or blogs commenting. He had a Kosher phone. Rebbi Shimon was never one to stay quiet though. He was an anti-Romer. Whatever they did was just to make themselves wealthy. They probably have some hidden investments in the road companies and malls they were opening. Forget about all the shmutz in their personal lives that filled the tabloids that they were now going to be infecting everyone with. They were a spiritual plague and they should be eradicated. In the words of Tevye- Hashem should keep them far far away from us.

Now as we know Big Roman Brother is always watching. And there was a snitch, Yehuda Ben Gerim, and he told the Romans. The Roman response was to promote Rebbi Yehudah to be the speaker of the Jews. He was on their team. Rebbi Yosi was put under administrative supervision down in the city of  Tzippori and Reb Shimon and his son Reb Eliezer fled over here to Peki'in to hide in this cave. They buried themselves up to their necks and drank from the spring that was there (it's still there in Peki'in although not by the cave, because of earthquakes it got shifted down the mountain) and he ate from the carob tree that was there. I don't know what was the worst part about the whole thing but I think it was eating carobs all day…

12 years were up and he came out and according to the gemara he saw someone running to work. He got so incensed that one would waste the precious time that we were given in this world on the mundane ho-hum of making a living that he pretty much fried the guy. Hashem sent him back to the cave for another year and after the next year he was allowed out to rejoin the society. By the way according to the Aruch Hashulchan, the day he came out of the cave was on Lag Ba'Omer; the 33^rd day of the counting of the Omer. Oh and by the way this story can be found in tractate Shabbos on page 33. Oh and one last thing, since the beginning of the Talmud in tractate Brachos until this story of Rebbi Shimon on page 33 of Shabbos can you guess how many times Rebbi Shimon says a law? You got it… 33. You gotta admit that's pretty cool. But you see that's just the first part of it.

See, there is another story about how Rebbi Shimon made the pretty bold claim that if the whole world was found to be guilty in heavenly judgement and deserving of punishment, he and his son could just get on the other side of the scale and weigh it down to the side of mercy. And even if his son was on the wrong side, he alone had the heavenly power to free us all of punishment. The Maharsha suggests it is because of the suffering he had in the cave. I had a "friend" of mine that told me recently it wasn't that he was just cooped up in the cave. He was stuck there with his kid… I didn't understand what he was talking about…

But to be brutally honest, which I generally try to be- but the longer I am in lockdown here I'm find is becoming easier and easier, I never really got this idea. I don't know about you, but I never bought the concept that someone else's suffering has the power to alleviate me of my sins. Maybe it's all those years I spent knocking Christianity's ridiculous claims. Although it is true that they got most of their ideas from us. But I just felt there has to be something deeper in this idea and statement of Rebbi Shimon. And being that he was someone that always spoke the truth- Roman chips fall where they may, I guess perhaps my pursuit of the truth or at least a deeper understanding of this story, gave me a little bit of extra divine help to find an incredibly powerful and deep idea that I recently shared with my tourists- you guys today, when I visit that cave of his in Peki'in.

It was about two years ago on Lag Ba'Omer when I was heading up to Meron and I saw this small flyer that had some ideas and Torah about Rebbi Shimon. I've since lost that flyer and no idea where it came from. I generally don't read these things. But there on the bus, stuck in traffic, I leafed through it and boom it was a revelation. Recently I've tracked down some of the ideas and sources so I'll share with you what I've got.

Besides Lag Ba'Omer there is another day that has become popular in to visit the grave of Rebbi Shimon. That day is the 7^th of Adar the day of the passing of Moshe Rabbeinu. The Ari'Zl tells us that Rebbi Shimon possessed the completion of the soul of Moshe. Whereas Moshe revealed the written and oral Torah to the Jewish people, Rebbi Shimon revealed the hidden secrets of the Torah; the kabbalah. As well just as Moshe had to flee for his life from the Egyptians after being snitched on by a fellow Jew, so did Rebbi Shimon. The Chasam Sofer even points out that Lag Ba'Omer (without the vav in omer) is the same gematria as Moshe. Oh and one last thing… Rebbi Shimon's claim and power to get forgiveness for all of the Jewish people being obligated… remember how after the golden calf Moshe did the same thing?

Now do you know how Moshe was so confident that he would be able to get forever forgiveness for the Jewish people? He asked Hashem to reveal His face to him with that revelation he knew he would always be able to turn the tide of harsh judgement for us. What's the secret? What can we say or do to be able to stop this global punishment? Hashem put him in a cave and he revealed to him what we are familiar with as the 13 attributes/ middos of Hashem.  Remember "Who knows Thirteen" by your Pesach Seder. If we attach ourselves to Hashem and imitate His ways then we will be forgiven. Hmmm the number 13 and cave sounds familiar? Haven't we heard it before? That's right ladies and gentleman Rebbi Shimon was in the cave for 13 years.

The Livnas Sapir, from Reb Dovid the son of the famous 13the century Rebbi Yehudah Hachasid, ups this idea a notch as he brings from the Zohar that the cave that Rebbi Shimon was holed in was in fact the same cave that Moshe received the 13 middos in. (Yes, I know that Moshe was outside of Israel and Reb Shimon was here- but Hashem could move these things around. He was in the cave for 13 years because each year he learned another one of those Middos of Hashem. Once he had these in his back pocket he was able to return to the world and could then, just as Moshe, find the path to forgiveness for everyone.

The number 13 finds itself in other areas as well. Each morning when we recite the first part of davening of the korbanos sacrifices. And for those of you that have never had time to say it in Shul and thought that davening starts with Baruch She'amar or Hodu- these are the pages after brachos before pesukei di'zimra. You don't have shul anymore so it wouldn't hurt to start saying it. Those prayers conclude with the 13 different methods of logic from which the Torah is derived. Again the sefarim tell us that each one of those methods correspond to each of the 13 attributes of mercy. Remember how Rebbi Shimon left after 12 years and got all upset about the man that was so busy with this world and missing out on the real important spiritual world? Well the last of the 13 attributes that Rebbi Shimon hadn't learned is

"And if there are two verses that contradict each other one must look at the third verse to reconcile the two"

Rebbi Shimon saw a contradiction how can we live a physical existence and at the same time strive for the spiritual. It didn't make sense. In fact there is a Talmud in Brachos (and a great new song I composed down below to its words) that tells us Rebbi Shimon says if a man is busy plowing, planting, reaping, winnowing what will become of the Torah? The man becomes burnt up from this fire of spirituality emanating from Rebbi Shimon. It's kind of like the bright light that came out of Moshe when he came down from talking to Hashem that he had to hide. (The rays of light by the way were called hod-and lag ba'omer is hod she'bhod- but we'll leave that for now). So Hashem sends him back to learn that last attribute. To resolve the contradiction. It's the last attribute of mercy. It is v'nakeh- and I will cleanse you of all sin.

The story concludes with Rebbi Shimon coming out and seeing a Jew running with two myrtle branches. Perhaps not far from this cave we are standing in front of. He asks him where he is running and what they are for and the man responds it is for Shabbos. One is for the positive mitzva to remember Shabbos and one for the negative commandments to watch and not violate Shabbos. Rebbi Shimon then blesses him. Rebbi Shimon comes out to a world preparing for Shabbos.

The Zohar tells us that Rebbi Shimon is very connected to Shabbos. The mitzva of Shabbos is used as the introduction for all of the holidays in this week's Torah portion (I just had to sneak that traditional phrase into this week's Email-and you thought I forgot). This is despite the fact that it is not technically a holiday. The reason for this because Shabbos is the source for all of the holiness in the world. On Shabbos we are a bit like Rebbi Shimon in his cave. No work, no worries, food from Hashem, basking in spirituality, Torah and our family. We are meant to draw that holiness to the rest of the world. Shabbos is the gift of Moshe we recite in our Shabbos davening. And we take that holiness and bring it into the week by preparing for it with love. Rebbi Shimon saw this on the Lag Ba'Omer he came out and he recognized the holy spark in each Jew can become the holy of holies in this physical mundane world if we have the Shabbos to reignite that spark. It resolved the contradiction between the two worlds. Shabbos is the day of the root tashuv- return. We come back to our source. We return to our Father.

The redemption will come Rebbi Shimon teaches us when the Jewish people will observe two Shabbosos we will be redeemed. In other places it says that if we observe one Shabbos it will be enough. I saw once suggested that Rebbi Shimon wasn't arguing he was discussing the two aspects of one Shabbos. The two myrtles. The Shabbos of zachor-always remembering and enjoying the Shabbos and celebrating our holy day and the Shabbos of shamor- removing ourselves from the outside world that pulls, draws and tempts to define us. Become Shabbos yiddin. Become students of Rebbi Shimon. The past two months all of our Shabbosos have been different. We are not in Shul. We don't have our friends. We don't have the Rebbetzin's Chulent Kiddush (ya thought I wouldn't get that in as well didn't you?). It's been more sublime. I don't think anyone is defining themselves anymore by the outside world. We have become Rebbi Shimons Cave students. May Hashem let us out of our caves by this Lag Ba'Omer as he did to our Rebbi. And may we finally bask in that holy light we have been longing for so long.

Have a doubly holy Shabbos and an amazing Lag Ba'Omer

Rabbi Ephraim Schwartz

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RABBI SCHWARTZ’S FAVORITE YIDDISH PROVERB OF THE WEEK

" Hit zikh, du host zikh shoyn eyn mol opgebrit!"- Be careful, you got burned once already!

RABBI SCHWARTZ'S TOUR GUIDE EXAM QUESTION OF THE WEEK

answer below at end of Email

26) A Roman triumphal arch can be seen in:

A.    Caesarea

2. Yodfat
3. Jerusalem
4. Beit Guvrin

RABBI SCHWARTZ’S COOL VIDEO  OF THE WEEK

https://youtu.be/ppovWxuFfTw   - Totally awesome Od Yeshvu Malchus choir Acapella porch minyan Corona version… Gives the song a whole new meaning…

https://vimeo.com/413256679 - If you have time (and who doesn't?) and want to see an awesome video this is a special video of a collection of never before seen footage of tens of gedolim/ great Jewish Rabbis from the last 100 years..

https://soundcloud.com/ephraim-schwartz/rebbi-shimon-bar-yochai – In honor of Lag Ba'Omer my latest composition and release!! Rabbi Shimon Bar Yochai Omer… One of my most magnificent compositions with vocals and arrangements by the extraordinarily hartzig talented awesome Dovid Lowy- (non-acapella)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9ZCsdn4k6R0 – Very cool Lag Ba'Omer historical footage 1950's Israel

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QNwEbXrP9pE – Aharon Razel Lech Ami Chadarav- My Nation go in your room

RABBI SCHWARTZ'S PARSHA/MITZVA CONNECTION OF THE WEEK

Parshat Emor-V'Kidashto- Honoring a Kohen- Here's a mitzva that a lot of people do regularly and are not even aware that they are fulfilling a biblical commandment. It's also one that one can easily fulfill and we miss out on our chance. Not anymore! The Torah in the beginning of this week's Parsha shares with us the mitzvos of Kohanim. It concludes with a mitzva for the Jewish people to sanctify the Kohen. The Talmud tells us that this mitzva is fulfilled

Gittin (59:) The kohen should open first (liftoach rishon), he should bless first, and he should take a nice portion first"

So every time we bentch after eating and we honor the Kohen to lead is in bentching we are fulfilling a positive commandment. We are showing that we hold his position to be sacred. Similarly, when we give him the first Aliya to the Torah when we read it in Shul he is as well being honored by the congregation. (May we be able to get back to fulfilling that one very soon god-willing when we return to our shuls).

So this is definitely a positive commandment when it comes to fulfilling positive commandments. What about regular things? So like all Jewish things there will be a debate. It revolves around that above talmud's cases of "opening first" and "taking a portion first". Some suggest that means only by Torah gatherings he should be the first speaker and by mitzva meals or maaser or even tzedaka he can take first. But not necessarily letting him go in line before you in the supermarket. Others suggest that those cases are even by regular day speaking and meals a Kohen should have first dibs. The Magen Avraham seems to say we should be strict about this and always give a Kohen first dibs and show him honor. He wonders why people are not strict about this as well. So it's not just us… He suggests that perhaps it's because maybe our Kohanim are not of clear lineage. But he still maintains people should be strict about it.

Now there is another aspect to this mitzva as well. The Torah tells us that he should be sanctified even against his will. Seemingly Rashi notes this teaches us that if a Kohen is defiling himself in some way we are obligated to keep him pure. The question is if this law applies to giving him honor as well. Are we allowed to ask a Kohen to do us a favor, to serve us, to shlep things? Or can a Kohen forgo his honor? So in general the consensus is that besides for Torah reading where he cannot give up the first Aliya he has the right to forgive the honor. By Torah reading if he wishes not to get the Aliyah he must step out. However, that does not necessarily include menial or degrading labor. That the Meshech Chochma suggests would be prohibited according to all opinions. However, he got paid or got some benefit out of it then it would be fine. As he is doing it for his own good.

One last hopefully never practical aspect of this law that I saw this week is in regards to saving lives. A Kohen has precedence. So if god forbid there was only one ventilator in the hospital the Kohen would get it over the Yisrael. However that is conditioned on the Kohen being on equal Torah level as the other person. For the law is that when it comes to life saving and other areas of of precedence a Talmid Chacham comes first. So if you're a Kohen reading this become a talmid Chacham… And we Yisraels will be happy to honor you all the time even above other Rabbis if that's the case. But even if you're not one. Each time we honor you it is because of you being our connector to Hashem. Here in Israel we feel that more so than in the States because they bless us every day. So a little bit of honor back is the least we can do for all that bracha you bring us.

RABBI SCHWARTZ'S ERA’S AND THEIR PLACES AND PEOPLE IN ISRAEL OF THE WEEK

Eli the Kohen Gadol and sons 929-831 BC – Talk about perfect timing. This past week on the 10^th of Iyar was in fact the yartzeit of the Kohen Gadol that followed Pinchas and who led the Jewish people for forty years; Eli Hakohen. Eli was the forth in line from Moshe then Yehoshua then Pinchas to be the bearer of the tradition from Sinai. He lived in Shilo where the Mishkan was until his death at age 98. He was a tzadik and loved by the people. His children Hofni and Pinchas…not so much… The Navi tells us that their behavior made him age young and they cut they ultimately were the cause of the curse that would always follow his family.

As opposed to the young boy Shmuel who as we mentioned was brought up in the home of Eli and was considered righteous and worthy of prophecy. Chofni and Pinchas were rotten apples. See… sometimes it's not the best solution to keep the kids at home. As well sometimes the parents could be righteous but their children not. This seems to be a repeated message by most of the great people from our Patriarchs and down in Jewish history. What did they do already? Well it depends on how you read the navi. Literally the verses tell us that they didn't "know Hashem", they would demand parts of the offerings that they didn't deserve and send young "hit-men" that would grab the sacrificial food that people would bring as offerings for themselves. As well the navi even suggests that they would "lie" with women that were waiting to bring offerings. Oy... a shanda…

Now the Talmud doesn't take that last one so literally it suggests that it is just a euphemism. What they did was ignore the women who would bring their offerings for childbirth which were burnt offerings and make them wait and sleep over in Shiloh until they would be seen. There was no gain for them in bringing these offerings anyways, no kickbacks so to speak, so they delayed them. This caused the women to be away from home longer than they needed to and thus it was considered like they lay with them.

Eli go two warnings about them. First Elkana, the father of Shmuel brought Eli a prophecy of doom that his line would be cut off and no one will live long. Even more dramatic that his two children will be killed on the same day. Eli confronted his sons, but its nisht ge'helfen. He was speaking to a wall. As well, Shmuel's first prophecy ever as a young man as well was Hashem telling him to tell Eli that his sons would die and no atonement or sacrifices will help them.

We will continue with the story of the fate of Eli and his children. But interestingly enough the Talmud tells us that Abaya and Rabba were descendants of Eli. They both lived about 1300 years or so after this story and curse and they both died young. Rabba who was primarily involved in Torah study lived until 40 and Abaya split his time between Torah study and good deeds live until 60. Eli's grave is not certain where it is although it's in Shilo. Abaya's kever though can be visited and I pass it regularly it is right outside of Tzfat by Biriya next to his contemporary and protagonist Rava.  And of course this a story I like to share with people when we are there.

RABBI SCHWARTZ’S AND EVEN MORE TERRIBLE CORONA JOKES  OF THE WEEK

FUNNIEST MEME's of the WEEK

8-year-old Yanky to Mommy "It's a school bus Mom, Stop calling it the "answer to your prayers"

When we reopen the school the yeshivas be like: All masks must be black with no logos, pictures, designs or fancy trimmings, no exceptions!

My 16-year-old with the best How-will-the-pandemic-change-society insight: We''ll never get off for snow days anymore now that the teachers have and know how to work Zoom

The lockdown is tightening. Now with the rainfalling we can't even go out to the porch

Cinco De Mayo finally falls out Taco Tuesday only to be canceled by a virus named after a Mexican beer.

Yoily in Villiamsburgh to Moishie in Lakewood. "It's not fair! Trump gets to have a secret service… Why can't we?"

You never realized just how anti-social you are until there's a pandemic and your life just hasn't changed that much.

I think my feet are shrinking every time I look straight down I see less and less of them…

Gardening season is off to a great start. I planted myself in front of my computer  weeks ago and I've already grown noticeably

You have to at least admit enjoying watching airlines lose 30 billion dollars after they charged me $30 to check my bag.

I just heard about these giant murder hornets on the News. Should I buy more toilet paper?

Remember Rebbi Shimon Bar Yochai davened for 12 years in quarantine without a minyan just to make sure he didn't get killed. And then when he came out and someone got killed he went back in and didn't daven with a minyan for a whole nother year… I'm just sayin…

Well my resolution not to talk anymore in Shul has been going great. I'm 7 weeks without breaking it once!

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Answer is C–  I got this one right by mistake a little bit. I guessed Yerushalayim although I didn't know of a roman victory gate there. I knew there was one there and there is a pillar that remains there. I certainly was pretty sure there wasn't any by Caesarea Yodefat certainly not and I didn't remember any by Beit Guvrin either. The answer was correct, but the Roman gate wasn't by Shaar Shechem it was by Aco Homo on the Via Dolorosa in the Muslim quarter. I don't guide the Arab quarter much and pretty much deleted much of my tour guide course info from there. But hey I got it right. So that works so the score now is Schwartz 17 and 9 for MOT (Ministry of Tourism) on this exam. So I'm back in passing score range!

Jingle Coins- Parshat Vayakkhel / Shekalim 2019/ 5779

Insights and Inspiration

from the

Holy Land
from

Rabbi Ephraim Schwartz

"Your friend in Karmiel"

March 1^st 2019 -Volume 9 Issue 22-24^th of Adar I 5779

Parshat Vayakhel / Shekalim

Jingle Coins

So besides being a tour guide as you know I also am privileged to have a shul here in Karmiel. The shul thing though, is not a money maker. I don’t know if shuls were ever meant to be. It actually costs me money. Baruch Hashem as our congregation has grown and people contribute, and thanks to the many of you that send in donations and sponsor our weekly E-Mails it costs me less. I appreciate that. So does my tzadekes wife who keeps our books, while her fiscally irresponsible husband strikes ahead living out his dream of having a congregation in Israel and creating a unique place where charedi, daati leumi, americans, russians, ethiopians, chabad and even some secular Jews find their place and join together to serve Hashem and to connect with one another. It’s a chulent of Jews and I like chulent.

Now we don’t have membership in our shul. I was never a fan of the ideology of “pay-to-pray”. I view all of Israel as “members in good standing”. Those of you tourists that visit, are also included in this not so exclusive club. Big donors, small donors, no donors and even shnorrers all have equal status. There’s no board of directors, no president or vice president or secretary or treasurer. It’s me paying the bills with the help of the donations I receive and the International Young Israel behind me for moral support and to clear the large grants that we receive. I’m good with that. I feel privileged to be instrumental and part of providing such a fantastic place that brings Jews of all stripes, colors and kippas together and to create a place and environment in our Holy Land that attracts the 10’s of olim that have moved here and made it their home.

The benefit of the not being hired by anyone is of course I can’t get fired. See Ma, I finally figured out how to hold down a job J. As well, the shul really runs- at least when I’m around and not running around the country on tours- according to the vision that I have for it. Shabbos we daven nusach sefard, obviously the only correct and proper nusach that self-respecting haymish people should daven. Although during the week it’s whoever gets up for the amud that davens in his own nusach. Friday night is Carlebach style, Shabbos morning we have 8:30 Shacharis- which for Israelis is the equivelant of an American 9:30 Minyan as I have the latest minyan in town. We have the blessing for the State of Israel and the army (although not for those that don’t talk during davening part… hmmmm- tircha d’tzibura….(?)). I speak like an American style Rabbi after kriyas hatorah- but I speak in Hebrew. And we have of course a chulent kiddush after davening each week. When asked what the concept of the shul is I tell people that the idea is that there should be at least one thing that everybody has to complain about. To meet that basic Jewish need. Everyone has to give up something to come to our shul, whether it’s the nusach, the mi shebeairachs, the speech, the singing but at the end of the day through doing that it brings us all closer together.

Now I’m not a greedy guy. And I feel very strongly as does aforementioned fiscally responsible spouse that I should share this tremendous merit with my congregants. I shouldn’t hoard for myself, all the divine brownie points and the incredible for all that nachas Hashem has in shamayim every time He looks down at our shul. So I compromised. Twice a year I make appeals for about a week or two after davening each morning. The times of year that I do that are before Purim and before Rosh Hashana. Rosh Hashana, in order to give people some extra merits before the High Holidays and before Purim to share with everyone the joy of holiday giving. It wasn’t difficult to figure out the good times to do this. Every year as we approach Purim we introduce the joy of Purim with the reading of parshat shekalim- the additional torah reading that was read that enjoins every Jew to contribute his half shekel for the daily sacrifices that were brought in the Temple. Now although I told my shul when I started my appeals two weeks ago already, that in a leap year when we have two months of Adar we are told that there is no difference between the first Adar and the 2^nd Adar besides for the reading of megilla and the gifts to the poor. This would imply that the annual adar appeal should happen in the first month of Adar as well as the second. Because obviously the mitzvah to increase happiness begins in the first Adar and you can’t really be happy until you partnered with us in our shul endeavor. Yet we don’t read the portion of shekalim until the 2^nd Adar. We want to read it closer to Purim and closer to Pesach and Nisan when the new sacrifice fiscal year begins again.

Yet this year we read this parsha two weeks in a row. We read it Ki Tisa last week with the mitzvah of shekalim and we read it this week with the supplemental parsha of shekalim again. In fact, from almost three weeks ago by Mincha of Parshat Tetzave we already started reading it. I don’t think there is another parsha that is read that many times consecutively. It’s like the gabbai tzedaka walking around the shul cling cling clinging the pushka. Have you given yet?

Now getting up after davening each day and making a short appeal is not a fun thing. Not for me and not for my congregants. They have to run out and get to work or Kollel and no one wants to hear a short speech asking for money. I try to make it entertaining though, I share a cute vort, a story a joke, some inspiration some guilting, in my inimitable cute Rabbi Schwartz way that you all love- or not… It’s good for two weeks or so, but this year when I started a month early in the first Adar it was certainly getting tiresome. They were glad that they had the past week off though. See when I’m on tours and not in Karmiel, like this past week, there’s no appeal. It’s another reason why I started early this year because I’m not going to be around much the week or so before Purim as I have tours and I really didn’t want to deprive my congregants of this twice a year opportunity to partner with us.

When I returned this morning and gave my shpiel about how sorry I was that I was not around this past week, I told them that I had sent a messenger in my place to make it for me. Did they hear that gabbai all week long? They looked at me strangely and I told them that I certainly did. See as I was driving around Israel this week I heard the thunder and lightning and storms all week along. Didn’t they understand what that was? It was Hashem jingling the pushka upstairs for them to put the money in! He was sending rains of bracha because he wants you to have what to put in our pushka. The thunder is the clanging of that Divine charity box and the lightning is sparks of fire that come off those heavenly coins as they bang against each other. It’s time for shekalim.

Now in case you think I am making this up, the midrash in fact tells us that when Hashem commanded the Jews to give their half-shekels to atone for their sins and souls, Moshe had a hard time understanding it. So Hashem reached under His Heavenly throne and pulled out a coin made of fire. So as you see from this Midrash, what does Hashem have hiding under His throne? Shekels. Like a good Israeli that doesn’t trust the bank system here, Hashem keeps His coins right under His chair. So as I said the thunder and lightning? That’s Hashem clanging His coins together.

Now this is a strange midrash. What is so difficult for Moshe to understand about a half shekel. It seems like a pretty simple concept. Although some suggest that perhaps Moshe had a hard time understanding how a half coin could atone for sins. But there are lots of things that atone that are probably just as difficult. An animal offering a flour offering, even teshuva how does all of that work? In fact, I’m only aware of two other times that medrash tells us Moshe didn’t understand something. When it comes to making the menora and when Hashem explains to him what types of insects are kosher and which ones aren’t. In both cases I understand why Hashem had to show him what they looked like. They’re complicated. But what’s so complicated about a shekel? As well, you can ask what it this whole coin made out fire thing? He didn’t show him an insect made out of fire. And why really does Hashem have these coins under His throne?

The answer I heard once is pretty incredible. A coin and fire are two opposites. A coin is a solid tangible thing. Fire is intangible. It’s hot, it can’t be held it has not form. How do you have a coin of fire. The truth is there is something else like that. You know what it is? It’s us. See, who are we? We are certainly not our bodies. As our bodies change all the time. Sometimes I’m fat, sometimes I’m on a diet and not as fat. I once had hair. Now not so much. When we die our bodies are still there but ‘we’ are not. We are actually a soul and body connected. Now a soul is something like fire. It is intangible. It has no form. Yet our body which has a form when it is joined together with that soul that is who we are. It is called us. The Baal Haturim tells us that shekel is the gematria of the word nefesh- a living being. We are in fact the living breathing fiery coins of Hashem.

There is an interesting halacha about the half shekel coin. Everyone has to give it. Rich, poor, old, young, man and woman. The daily sacrifices can’t be brought until every last Jew has given his or her half shekel. Let’s say someone doesn’t have any money. He has to sell everything he has to make it happen. Let’s say, he doesn’t want to give it? We force him to. And this is not typical like when a person doesn’t want to do a mitzvah we force him until he “says he wants to- ad sh’omeir rotzeh ani”. Here we take it even if he is screaming that he doesn’t want to give it. He’s that bad. Moshe didn’t understand this. How can that be? What type of atonement is that? Hashem showed him the fiery coin. In each Jew there is that pure unadulterated spark that can never be tainted. Each Jew is a shekel of fire. That is what I have under my throne. You may not see it. He may look like the worst unaffiliated, anti-religious, evil Jew and person. But if he is still breathing than he has that holy pure untainted soul inside of him. He is a coin of fire. And not even you, Moshe, can bring the daily sacrifice until you see that he is that half of a shekel that connects to My other half up here under My throne.

So it has been a blessed winter here in Eretz Yisrael. Hashem has been clanging all winter long. The streams are overflowing with rains of blessing the Kinneret is filling up. We have an extra month of simcha; an extra month to bask in the joy of knowing that inside of us is something that is so pure and holy; that it is half of a coin that is sitting under the throne of our Father in heaven. All we have to do now is express that joy. Reveal that spark. Reach into our pockets and connect it to Hashem. We don’t have a mishkan or daily sacrifices to give that half shekel to. But we do have our shuls, the place that we pray and our daily prayers are in place of our sacrifices. In the merit of us answering the call of shekalim, May Hashem then bring us to the next stages of the elimination of Amalek, the purity of the Red Heifer and the month of redemption.

Have a holy fiery Shabbos!

Rabbi Ephraim Schwartz

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RABBI SCHWARTZ’S FAVORITE YIDDISH PROVERB OF THE WEEK

“Tsedokeh zol kain gelt nit kosten un gemilas-chassodim zolen kain agmas-nefesh nit farshafen, volten geven di velt fil tsadikim.”– If one could do charity without money and favors without aggravation, the world would be full of saints.

RABBI SCHWARTZ'S TOUR GUIDE EXAM QUESTION OF THE WEEK

answer below at end of Email

Q A commemorative site for female combat troops is found in:

A. “The joined control position”

B. Palmahim

C. Akhziv

D. Nitzanim

RABBI SCHWARTZES COOL VIDEOS OF THE WEEK

https://soundcloud.com/ephraim-schwartz/techelet-mordechai – You really won’t have a great Purim Seuda unless you learn this song and sing it again and again! My Techelet Mordechai

https://youtu.be/hyBFpPL0REw   -New Ari Goldwag song Hafachta!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JJyQnlX8X30  – Purim Rock of the ages Love It!!!

https://youtu.be/yM6zs91Khns -In honor of Shekalim- what song do we need to hear? Gelt By Lipa fo course!!!

RABBI SCHWARTZ'S “LOMDUS” CONNECTION OF THE WEEK

Parshat Vayakhel– What’s is preferable having or doing something faster or doing it with better quality in a finer or more precise way? This is a debate Israelis and Americans have. Americans like fast food Israelis will never eat food that is sitting and waiting and is not first starting to be prepared when they walk in. How about mitzvos? Is it better to do it with alacrity- zerizus- for my children and seminary girls at the table that don’t speak English, or is it better to do it slower, carefully and making sure it’s all perfect? I think many of you would probably say the latter. But that’s because you’re Americans. But what would our sages say? These are lomdushe klers- dilemmas. And if you are a good lamdan you try to ‘proof-it-out’ from some biblical source. This week’s Torah portion actually gives us a great one.

We are told in the parsha that the leaders of each of the tribes brought their gifts for the mishkan which consisted of the shoham and filling stones. However, when writing the word nesi’im the Torah leaves out the last yud in the spelling. It’s missing a letter. Rashi notes this and brings the midrash to explain

Rashi Shemos (35:27) Rabbi Nathan said: What prompted the princes to donate for the dedication of the altar first [before the rest of the Israelites] while [in contrast] they did not donate first for the work of the Mishkan? This is what the princes said, “Let the community donate what they will donate, and what[ever] they are missing-we will complete.” Once the community completed everything- the princes said, “What are we to do?” So they brought the shoham stones, etc. Therefore, they brought [donations] first for the dedication of the altar. Since at first they were lazy [i.e., they did not immediately donate], a letter is missing from their name

The Shai LaTorah notes that the problem was not that their rationale. It’s nice and commendable to say you will cover whatever deficit in the budget there is. It is because they were lazy, the midrash is telling us. They didn’t act with zerizus. They didn’t jump and do it as fast as possible.

He quotes the Chasam Sofer who suggests that the act of doing something quickly even if its not perfect is actually a disagreement between Avraham and Sarah back in Bereishit. When the angels come to visit Avraham tells Sara

Bereishit (18:6) Hurry and knead 3 se’ah of un-sifted flour, sifted flours and make cakes

Well is it sifted or un-sifted? So the midrash tells us that Avraham told her use un-sifted just make it fast! Sarah however like a good baalahbusta would never serve un-sifted flour put it through 13 sieves to make it clear. She wanted it to be good. What happened? She became tamei-impure in the interim and the whole thing had to be thrown out. {Now she was certainly not expecting to become impure- as an older woman who had not been tamei for years this was not something she ever dreamed would happen, and it was miraculous} See sometimes listening to your husband and doing it fast is better.

The Chasam Sofer explains that this is in fact what we say in Eishet Chayil each week.

Tzofiah halichos beisa- v’lechem atzlus lo sochal- She anticipates the needs of her household, and the bread of idleness, she does not eat.

Because Sarah was anticipating the needs of her guests. She wanted to make sure it was perfect. The bread of idleness. The bread that was delayed and not served fast like Avraham asked was not eaten.

Cool! Let’s hear it for fast food!

RABBI SCHWARTZ'S ERA’S AND THEIR PLACES AND PEOPLE IN ISRAEL OF THE WEEK

Chatzor and the battle of the North 1272 BC – So after Yehoshua conquered the lower plainlands and Negev and killed the 5 Kings he headed back to Gilgal to rest. Meantime here nt he North Yavin the most important remaining Canaani Kings decides this is his chance to attack. He puts together alliance with all of the Kings of the Shomron, the Hermon, the coastal city of Doe both sides of the Jordan and even up to Tzidon in Lebanon. Hashem told Yehoshuah he had nothing to fear.

The battle took place by a place called Mei Merom and Yehoshuah shmoddered them chasing them north and south. He went to Chatzor and burned down the entire city. Despite the fact that they didn’t do that by other cities Chatzor as the instigator and the largest King needed to be taught a lesson. And with this the North became ours.

So the city of Chatzor, by Tel Chatzor is one that we know today. It is in fact one of the largest archaeological sites in Israel and is a UNESCO recognized biblical site. There are many things from different periods found on the tel that was also a Jewish city in the times of King Solomon. However they have found many burnt remains that date back 3400 years to the times of Yehoshua and many smashed Canaanite idols that are exactly as the Tanach tells us.

The harder question is where is this Mei Marom that this huge battle took place? There are some that place it ancient Hula Lake, which was right next to Chatzor. However there are mentions of the Hula independently of that. Others place it near Nachal Pa’aara by Lebanon Israel border where there are hundreds of springs and Yet there are other that suggest it is near Meron, noting the similarities between the names. Regardless the battle took place really over the North here down to Dor right by Casarea as well, so really anywhere in the North is fair to talk about this incredible conquest of the Jews.

RABBI SCHWARTZ’S JEWISH SHUL JOKES  OF THE WEEK

Hymie walks into his synagogue with a dog. The shammas immediately comes up to him and says, "This is a House of Worship, Hymie, you know you can't bring a dog in here." 

"What do you mean I can’t?" says Hymie, "Look at him, he’s a Jewish dog." 

The shammas then notices that the dog has a tallis bag round its neck. 

Hyme then says to the dog, "Benjamin, daven for me." 

The dog stands on his back legs and says, "Woof woof, woof," then opens the tallis bag, takes out a kippa and puts it on his head, exactly in between its ears. 

"Woof, woof," says the dog who then pulls out a tallis and puts it round his neck. 

"Woof, woof, woof," says the dog who then takes out a siddur and starts to pray, rocking from side to side. 

"That's brilliant," says the shammas, "totally incredible. You must get him on TV and the movies and you could make millions.” 

"You speak to him then," says Hymie, "he wants to be a doctor."  

Izzy is sitting in synagogue one Shabbat morning when he falls asleep and starts to snore. The gabbai quickly comes over to him, taps him softly on his shoulder and says, "Please stop your snoring, Izzy, you're disturbing the others in the shul."
"Now look here," says Issy, "I always pay my membership in full, so I feel I have a right to do whatever I want."
"Yes, I agree," replies the gabbai, "but your snoring is keeping everybody else awake." 

The synagogue wanted to help their congregation cope better with the stresses of modern life, and decided to offer a course in Time Management. Soon after the course was announced, a member telephoned the Rabbi.
“What time does the course start, Rabbi?”
The Rabbi replied, “Oh... fivish, sixish....” 

An elegantly dressed man starts up the steps of a large temple on Yom Kippur. At the front door, a security guard stops him:

"Are you a member of this synagogue, sir?" the guard asks.

"No."

"Did you purchase a ticket to attend Rosh Hashana and Yom Kippur services here?"

"No, I did not," the man says.

"I'm sorry," the guard says, "but you are forbidden to enter the synagogue then."

The man is desperate. "I have a very important message to give to Mr. Brian Goldstein. It's a  matter of the greatest importance, an emergency. His wife just had a baby. You must let me in to speak with him."

"Okay, okay," the guard finally says. "I'll let you in. But if I catch you praying..."

After his wife died, an old Jew received a parrot from his sons to keep him company. After a time, he discovered that the parrot had heard him pray so often that it learned to say the prayers. The old man was so thrilled he decided to take his parrot to the synagogue on the Jewish New Year of Rosh Hashanah. The rabbi protested when he entered with the bird, but when told the parrot could "daven" the rabbi, though still skeptical, showed interest. People started betting on whether the parrot would pray, and the old man happily took bets that eventually totaled $50,000.

The prayers began but the bird was silent. As the prayers continued there was still not a word from the bird. When the prayers ended, the old man was not only crestfallen but also $50,000 in debt. On the way home he thundered at his parrot:

 "Why did you do this to me? I know you can pray, you know you can pray. Why did you keep

your mouth shut? Do you know how much money I owe people now?"

To which the parrot replied: "A little business imagination would help you, dear friend. You must look ahead: Can you imagine what the stakes will be like on Yom Kippur?"

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Answer is D–  Absolutely no clue about this one. Even my process of elimination method wasn’t that sure. I’m pretty sure if this was the exam I would’ve skipped this one, as you are allowed to skip 5 questions. I certainly would’ve starred it on the first time around. I eliminated Achziv, because I remember that site for the soldiers that fell in blowing up the bridge there. Joined control position- don’t even know what that it is. Seemingly google doesn’t either but it just sounded like a giveaway answer. I went with Palmachim figured it had something to do with women’s effort and illegal immigration where they were very active in that took place near there. Turns out the answer was Nitzanim commemorating their effort in the first real losing battle in 1948 against the Egyptians by this southern coastal Kibbutz. Another one wrong for me. Ah Well.. Schwartz 16 and 3 for MOT (Ministry of Tourism) on this exam so far.