from the
Holy Land
from
Rabbi Ephraim
Schwartz
"Your friend
in Karmiel"
March 31st
2023 -Volume 12 Issue
24 9th of Nissan 5783
Parshat Tzav- Ha’Gadol
(Check out my latest Mishpacha
column below! )
"Will you just grow up already!"
"Why
don't you act your age?"
"You want to be treated like an adult?
Start acting like one!"
There are perhaps no words more annoying or frustrating
for a kid to hear. I should know. I'm still hearing it... and it still hasn't
worked. I don't understand. I see all these advertisements about recapturing
your youth, all types of anti-aging pills so one can feel like a kid once
again, and therapists preaching about finding your "inner child". It
seems that I was ahead of the game. Why act like an adult when you’re a kid,
only to become an adult looking for his lost childhood? This is a troubling
question and you know what we do with troubling questions at this time of year?
We save them for the Pesach Seder; the night of questions. And do you know what
they answer us inevitably by the Pesach Seder? The reason is…so the children
will ask…sigh…they cycle goes on.
Now the reason behind this custom is NOT because
the Pesach sacrifice-a goat- is also referred to as a kid. Even though this
might be confusing particularly since the last song at the Seder is about this
one little kid/goat that a father bought for 2 zuzim. My kids always thought I
was the father that sold them for 2 zuzim. I reassured them that I wouldn't
sell them for anything less than 20 zuzim and maybe even a Dinar (or a good
dinner). They seemed relieved…or maybe not. Thank God for their mother. Back to
our E-Mail. Although those are not references to Seder night being "kids
night". The rest of the Seder is pretty much all about the kids. In fact
the Torah itself seems to revolve the commandments of this very special and
important night all about children.
The code of Jewish law discusses the
preparations for the Seder as revolving around utilizing all types of tricks to
keep the kids up. Hand out nuts and sweets (translate pump them up on sugar and
lay off the melatonin), wear a kittel- so children will ask, wash without
blessing- so children will ask. The seder pretty much begins all types of
strange activities that would usually get us kicked out of the dinner table,
leaning while drinking wine over a white tablecloth (not for long), dipping
vegetables in salt water and making all types of whiny faces, and stealing the
Afikoman and running an hiding it. It continues with each kid getting up and
asking their hopefully well-rehearsed four Ma Nishtana questions, which of
course then leads into the description of the 4 sons and from there it's the
ten plagues with all their appropriate accoutrements. Singing Dayeinu and
hallel, dipping marror, fressing matzah while leaning on pillows and then all
types of fun songs at the end, it is a night that kids dream of. It's all about
them. So to pre-empt the Seder this year I dare to ask the question. Why?
Why is this night different? Shouldn't the most
important night of the year be one where we as adults focus on the deep
questions and miracles that took place? I understand that kids should know the
traditions but why is it so important that it comes in the form of such strange
child-like behavior so that they ask questions just to ask them? Why must we do
all these strange things-almost behaving like children ourselves- to get them
to ask them? Why are we going donw to their level shouldn't we bringing them up
to ours.
The answer my friends, the Sefas Emes of Ger
suggests, is that is precisely the point of Pesach; to see-rather- to
experience the Exodus of Egypt on this night with the wonder, awe and amazement
of the innocent eyes of children. Perhaps the most next most essential mitzvah
of the night, after the telling/re-enacting of the story, is the eating of
Matzah and the prohibition of chametz. The difference between Matzah and
Chametz is essentially time; time to rise, time to get bloated, time to mature,
time to achieve that perfect state of man-developed food chockfull of wholesome
nutrients, preservatives and minerals and vitamins-like my cheerios box says.
Matzah on the other hand is cut short in that process. It's stuck in that first
state of development. Why is that the main staple? Because we are meant to get
away for a few days from all our man-made world with all the answers and
envelope ourselves in a world of Hashem. A world in which questions don't need
answers, the wonder and amazement of those miracles and that redemption are
awesome enough. We ask out of awe. We ask because we just want to be heard and
we know that our Father is listening to our voice and basking in our awe. We
are all His children and the Seder night is the night that we get back to that
moment…through the eyes and questions of our children.
The Sefas Emes suggests that it is for this reason that this Shabbos before Pessach is referred to as Shabbas Ha'Gadol the great or big Shabbos. He suggests that until this Shabbos when we were in Egypt we observed Shabbos in some way but it was entrenched in slavery. It was a day-off from hard work. It was in an un-commanded state like the observances of a minor. This Shabbos when Hashem commanded us in Egypt to prepare for our Exodus and prepare our Pesach offering was the first time we observed Shabbos as a "Gadol" an adult. Our Bar Mitzvah Shabbos so to say.
What
changed on this Shabbos? We were still in Egypt. The redemption had not yet
come? But we were able to see it. For the first time we moved beyond the 210
year realities of our day-to day life of slaves and experienced the Exodus and
Shabbos before it had even arrived as a Bar Mitzvah boy on his first Shabbos.
We became that youthful, starry eyed young man and we jumped into the
commandment to forget about time and place and move above it with the faith and
dedication to Hashem and our new exciting reality. It is no coincidence that
our first mitzvah Ha'Chodesh Ha'Zeh Lachem- to count the Jewish months
is the introduction to all of the mitzvahs of Pesach. Like a child we don't
have to think or worry about time. Time revolves around us. Not us around it.
I think
about the life through the eyes of a child. The incredible places their tour
guide father takes them. There is nothing more precious than the wonder in
their eyes as they look out at the world. Sure they ask questions, how did this
form this way? Why is it that shaped like that? What type of tree, rock, castle
is that? What's the name of that
mountain, that lake, that star? They really don't care about the answer. They
just want me to know that they're here with me. That I'm sharing the experience
with them.
All the
other nights of the year we are perhaps slaves to time. Slaves to our
responsibilities, slaves to our questions. But on this night of Pesach we are
free to return to ourselves and to that wonder. It's a hard thing to do in one
night. But that's what kids are for. To help us and guide us into that world of
what we once were. Into that beloved child we are to Hashem. It's not about the
kids tonight. It's about us. The kids in us. The kids we may have forgotten
about. As we say in the Haggada even if we are all wise, knowledgeable like the
greatest sages that were sitting in Bnai Brak. Tonight we go back to that
simple childlike wonder and simply re-live and tell that story again like the
first time. If we could do that seder right and we make it until the end. Who
knows maybe Eliyahu might be at the door to sing L'shana Ha'Baah
Bi'Yerushalayim with us. Sounds crazy? Sounds like a child –like fantasy that
he might be there? Then stop growing up. Don't act your age for a night and you
might be surprised. Greater miracles have happened…and will once again..
Have a massively big and great Shabbos,
Rabbi Ephraim Schwartz
******************************************************************
**********************
GUESS WHO’S BACK IN MISHPACHA MAGAZINE JUST IN TIME FOR
CHANUKA!
It’s your favorite Rabbi Tour Guide!!
Check out my latest article on the
HILLS OF EPHRAIM
SHILO!!
https://mishpacha.com/dance-of-unity/
And then post share, and send letters to Mishpacha
telling them how much you enjoy them!
************************
YIDDISH PROVERB OF THE WEEK
““Kleyn
Shlufn Lozn Nit Shlofn, Groyse Kinder Lozn Nit Ru’in.” - Small children don’t let you sleep, Big children don’t let
you relax.
RABBI SCHWARTZ'S TOUR GUIDE EXAM QUESTION OF THE WEEK
answer below at end of Email
17) A type of
Roman amusement facility discovered in Beit Guvrin;
Where can you
find a columbarium?
A) Masada
B) the Keshet
cave
C) Sepphoris
(Zippori)
D) the Leopard
Temple
RABBI SCHWARTZ’S COOL VIDEO OF THE WEEK
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E2gzOvWrS28
-
It’s Pesach acapella season… Six13 Prince of Egypt 25th anniversary
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZfaIDcNiq0I
-Mordechai
Shapiro’s latest Ani Yehudi a song to sing when you’re a proud Jew!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I9JLJ16tXTE
– Hillarious
latest Bardak- An impossible
feast!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6dnZbHWIFTg
– Micha
Gammerman latest our strength is from Hashem “Rakata”
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sExHAL_XQjw
– Abie Rottenbergs Baruch
Hashem it’s Shabbos with Shloimy Gertner awesome!
RABBI SCHWARTZ'S ERA’S AND THEIR
PLACES AND PEOPLE IN ISRAEL OF THE WEEK
The Yarden Purification- 680
BC- So Naaman
upon the advice of the King of Aram- modern day Damascus, Syria comes down
to Elisha in the Shomron. He wants to impress Elisha so he brings
with him his horses and chariots and all entourage. Yet, Elisha knows
that the only cure for leprosy is humility. So he puts Naaman in his place.
He doesn’t even come to the doorway himself. He sends his servant and gives him
a message that he should go down to the Yarden river and dip himself 7
times. If he does that he will be purified.
The place in the Yarden this takes place today is of course
the same place where we entered into the land of Israel and where the water
split. As well it is where Eliyahu went up to Shamayim from. It is no wonder
that the Christians seeking a holy place to make up their baloney stories about
their false Messianic founder Yoshka was baptized there as well. Today
one can got to Kasr-El Yahud and visit the site. It’s a cool place to
see and make the blessings about where Hashem preformed miracles for our
forefathers here.
Naaman,
though is not too impressed. He’s in fact furious. He thought Elisha would
daven for him. He would go to the Bais Hamikdash and perhaps bring
sacrifices on his behalf. Just a dip in the Yarden? That’s all. He feels
he could’ve done the same thing in Aram. Yet, he doesn’t realize that
the real essence of the Yarden is that it is Yoreid. Get off your
high horse. Humble yourself. Do teshuva and Hashem will purify you.
His servants in fact convince him to give it a shot and lo and
behold 7 dips later and he is healed. He’s all better. He comes out and does
teshuva and swears he will never worship idols again. He becomes a Baal
Teshuva. He remains a righteous gentile. Yet, the story is not over yet, because
as we will see, as opposed to this moment being the turning point for Naaman,
Elisha’s servant Geichazi goes down the tubes here.
RABBI SCHWARTZ TERRIBLE
"SEDER IN A BAR" JOKES OF THE WEEK
A Seder plate walks into a
bar
Bartender
says: What can I get you?
Sederplate
says: Nothing right now, I got a lot on my plate
A matzah ball walks into a bar
Bartender says: Is this Round on
you?
Matzah walks into a bar
Bartender says: Looks like you had
a Crumby day?
Moses walks into a bar
Bartender says: Drinks for just
you or your staff?
The Jewish Nation walks into a bar.
Bartender says: You thought
splitting the sea was hard, try splitting this check
Chad Gad Ya walks into a bar
Bartender says: After that last
bar fight with the dog and cat and fire, it's gonna cost alot more than 2 zuzim
to get a drink here
Elijah walks into a bar
Bartender says: What can I get for
you Elijah?
Elijah says: Wait, you can see
me??
A Kiddush Cup walks into a bar
Bartender says: We don't serve
whiners here
Matzah walks into a bar
Bartender says: Havent seen you in
a while, where you been?
Matzah says: I've had some bad
breaks
Charoses and Marror walk into a
bar. The bartender says “Sorry, we don’t serve food here..”
Kiddush Cup walks into Bartender says: Sorry, we don’t serve whiners
here
Wise son and wicked son walk into a bar
Bartender says: What can I get you
boys?
Wise son asks for all the details
of how the drinks are made
Wicked son laughs: It's on his
tab, not mine. Had we been in Egypt I wouldnt have paid either.
Pharoah walks into a bar
Bartender says: So it's a Bloody
Mary or well, a Bloody Mary right?
Pharoah walks into a bar, doesnt speak
Bartender: Speak up? What do you
have a frog in your throat?
Pharoah: frogs here, frogs there
The Son 'who doesnt know how to
ask' walks into a bar
Bartender: Arent you going to
order? Helllo?
A Seder walks into a bar
Bartender: Let me guess this is
going to be different than all other nights?
Afikoment walks into a bar
Bartender: I'll get you a drink,
but dont you get lost because I will find you.
A seder kittel walks into a bar
Bartender says: What did someone die?
A haggadah walks into a bar
Bartender says: The way this guy
rambles on, I'm gonna need my own 4 cups
********************************
The answer to this week”s question is A –Another pretty easy and basic question. Beit Guvrin in the Shefela was a major Roman City and like many of them they had the basic form of entertainment which was gladiator fights and blood sport. It’s a good thing to keep your psychopathic populace engaged and too distracted to rebel against you. In Israel there are three places where we have the remains of those stadiums or Ampitheaters (which is not to be confused with a half ampi which is called a theater and was only for plays and shows). Beit Guvrin, Beit Shean and Caesarea. As far as the Columbarium or the structure where they would keep pigeons and birds in that would be there cell-phone towers as the birds were messenger ones, besides being a good nosh and their poop serving as good fuel for fire and stoves, we have them in many places in Israel. Yet of the list above Masada is the only one where we have quite a few of them in fact. So of course I got it right as they knocked it into our heads. So that makes the score as of now 14.5 for Schwartz and 2.5 for Ministry of tourism on this exam so far…
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